Marrieds choosing not to have kids

[zima-cheryl]

This weekend is my b-day and it is the one day DH can't so no to what I want to do I am choosing to go into the city (Philly) and take a historical walking tour.

We have been going into the city for about 25 years now, we have passed Independence Hall and the Liberty Bell 100s of times, and have taken them for granted b/c they are always there! I want to actually see them up close and personal. I want stories.

DH said fine- I think he has wanted to do it for some time now too.

So how was the birthday Madd? Did you get into Philly for your tour? Did you get cake? And gifts? And spoiled rotten on your special day?

DH and I had a fabulous three day weekend in Portland. It was our first time traveling by train. It was a beautiful three and a half hour trip from Seattle.

Traveling by train is sooo much nicer than air now days... I realize it takes just as long as driving, but no security hassels, no extra charge for every suitcase, minimal delays, more leg room in the seats, it is cheaper, saves the wear/tear on your car, and you can just kick back, nap & enjoy the trip.

 

[zima-cheryl]

I am 25 and my wife is 27. We dont really want kids either.

 

[maddhatir]

I am 25 and my wife is 27. We dont really want kids either.

Welcome!

Pisco is the most politically entertaining liquor in the world. Just read the discussion on wikipedia, you'll understand...just don't let a Peruvian or Chillian know that you're entertained http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pisco

Thanks for the wiki site! I printed it out for DH- he loves to try new things!

BTW- I highly doubt anyone has seen the "green fairy" in this present day I think those that say they have- are fibbing or may have drank the whole bottle and would not remember what the heck they saw!

I was out yardsaling a few weeks back- and a girl had an Absinthe set for sale. It was not the real thing- but we got to talking. She has never tried it- I told her I have a bottle and drink it sometimes. She kept saying how it will cause you to hallucinate etc and I was trying to tell her, no, not anymore- maybe long ago when it was not regulated- but I think it is more of a "myth". She INSISTED that it caused hallucinations and I just walked away-

Whatever- she has never tried it, but she is the expert

 

[maddhatir]

So how was the birthday Madd? Did you get into Philly for your tour? Did you get cake? And gifts? And spoiled rotten on your special day?

A storm started approaching about 3/4 of the way into the tour. The wind picked up, thunder, lightning- we made it back to the Visitors Center just in time for the downpour

I wanted to go into Independence Hall, see the gardens, the cemeteries and do lunch at a Stephen Starr restaurant that was recommended to us by our tour guide!

I told DH I need a b-day part 2! He felt so bad and agreed, so we will go back soon.

I never ask for anything for my b-day or on holidays, only b/c I get everything I want all year long Mom gave me some $$ so I am going to get myself an IPod- yes, I might be the only left on the earth without one!

 

[Shyvioletisme]

nope, neither DH nor I have one...I don't really have a need for an mp3 player right now and DH's boss gave him a cheap one that looks just like an IPOD mini, but isn't...so that works for him

sorry your tour got rained out!!!

 

[KirklandTutu]

Traveling by train is sooo much nicer than air now days... I realize it takes just as long as driving, but no security hassels, no extra charge for every suitcase, minimal delays, more leg room in the seats, it is cheaper, saves the wear/tear on your car, and you can just kick back, nap & enjoy the trip.

I'm trying to convice DH to take the Coast Starlight down to Disneyland. He keeps coming up with reasons not to. First it was the lack of a personal toilet...then I showed him that some sleepers do have them. Then he said it would take away from the time spent in Disneyland. I think he's full of it.

I was out yardsaling a few weeks back- and a girl had an Absinthe set for sale. It was not the real thing- but we got to talking.

Ok, this reminded me of a question I have, and this crew might be the ones to answer it. We have a set of glasses that came with a bar that we got at a second hand store. They are about 3 inches tall and look a bit like an hour glass...pinched in the middle with a balloon bottom and top. Any ideas what it's for?

 

[maddhatir]

Ok, this reminded me of a question I have, and this crew might be the ones to answer it. We have a set of glasses that came with a bar that we got at a second hand store. They are about 3 inches tall and look a bit like an hour glass...pinched in the middle with a balloon bottom and top. Any ideas what it's for?

I did a Google image search and is this what they look like?? Sorry the image is so large.

 

[maddhatir]

and on to another "mind altering note" can you only imagine if this happened!????


http://blog.norml.org/2008/07/29/no...to-urge-ending-federal-marijuana-prohibition/

Members of Congress Demand An End To Pot Possession Arrests

Wednesday, July 30, 2008: At a press conference held this morning, members of Congress called on their fellow lawmakers to remove all federal penalties that criminalize the possession and use of marijuana by adults.

“To those who say that the government should not be encouraging the smoking of marijuana, my response is that I completely agree,” said Representative Barney Frank (D-MA). “But it is a great mistake to divide all human activity into two categories: those that are criminally prohibited, and those that are encouraged. In a free society, there must be a very considerable zone of activity between those two poles in which people are allowed to make their own choices as long as they are not impinging on the rights, freedom, or property of others. I believe … criminalizing choices that adults make because we think they are unwise ones, when the choices involved have no negative effect on the rights of others, is not appropriate in a free society.”

Rep. Frank, along with co-sponsors Rep. Barbara Lee (D-CA) and Lacy Clay (D-MO), urged lawmakers to support HR 5843, An Act To Remove Federal Penalties for the Personal Use of Marijuana by Responsible Adults, which would eliminate federal penalties for possession of up to 100 grams of marijuana, and for the not-for-profit transfer of up to one ounce of marijuana. Other co-sponsors of the measure include Rep. Tammy Baldwin (D-WI); Rep. Earl Blumenauer (D-OR); Rep. Zoe Lofgren (D-CA); Rep. Jim McDermott (D-WA) and Rep. Ron Paul (R-TX).

This proposal reflects the basic recommendations of the National Commission on Marijuana and Drug Abuse (aka the Shafer Commission) in its groundbreaking report to Congress in 1972 titled Marihuana: A Signal of Misunderstanding.

“There is absolutely nothing wrong with the responsible use of marijuana by adults and this should be of no interest or concern to the government,” said NORML Executive Director Allen St. Pierre. “It makes no sense to continue to treat nearly half of all Americans as criminals. “

“I am a 43-year-old man, a graduate of the University of Massachusetts, I pay my taxes and, like millions of other Americans, I occasionally smoke marijuana. I cannot for the life of me understand why anyone would wish to treat me like a criminal, based on my responsible use of marijuana. It is time we stopped arresting responsible marijuana smokers, and HR 5843 would do that under federal law.”

This is the first federal marijuana decriminalization bill to be introduced in Congress since 1978, and reflects the changing public attitudes that no longer support treating responsible marijuana smokers like criminals. According to a nationwide Time/CNN poll, three out of four Americans now favor a fine only, and no jail, for adults who possess or use small amounts of marijuana.

Each year in this country we arrest more and more of our citizens on marijuana charges. In 2006, the last year for which the data are available, we arrested 830,000 Americans on marijuana charges, and 88 percent of those arrests were for personal possession and use, not trafficking. They were otherwise law-abiding citizens who smoke marijuana.

Since 1965, a total of nearly 20 million Americans - predominantly young people under the age of 30 -- have been arrested on marijuana charges; more than 11 million marijuana arrests just since 1990.

Currently 47 percent of all drug arrests in this country are for marijuana, and another marijuana smoker is arrested every 38 seconds. Police arrest more people on marijuana charges each year than the total number of arrestees for all violent crimes combined, including murder, rape, robbery and aggravated assault.

As President Jimmy Carter said in a message to Congress in 1977, “Penalties against drug use should not be more damaging to the individual than the use of the drug itself. Nowhere is this more clear than in the laws against the possession of marijuana in private for personal use.”

 

[BamaTigger]

I havent read this whole thread, but the topic SCREAMED my name! Been married since 92, and Im 35 yrs old and me and DH do not have kids (our 4 furbabies are our kids). Back in 01 I got pregnant and lost it at 3 months. I was taking care of my disabled parents for the last 7 years and I think the miscarriage happened for a reason....of course I was ECSTATIC when I found out I was pregnant, and of course I was DEVASTATED when I lost it....fast forwarding to now...well last year I unexpectedly and suddenly lost my dad (we were EXTREMELY close) and now I am at a point in my life where it is just me and my hubby and our 4 animals and I am at peace. I dont want children now. I guess after caring for my dad and step mom for 7 years, it is time to me and DH. Selfish? Some may think so. But I dont care. Why I like NOT having kids? I like being able to get up and go when i want! I like the quietness in my home. I love going to WDW without kids ( I see the stuff parents go thru with kids....the aggravating stuff, and oh boy...). I just love the life me and my DH have with out kids. My step mom is in a nursing home (she had a brain aneurysm in 2000 and is incompetent-and BTW--my dad passed away from the SAME THING--ironic isnt it). Anyway, back to the nursing home....I go in there and it is HEARTBREAKING to see all those people in there and I wonder if me and DH will be in there one day because we have no one to take care of us when we get old.....BUT that is no reason to have a child....I wouldnt want me to be a burden to my son or daughter if I had one anyway. So alot goes thru my mind about NOT having kids, rather than HAVING kids.

Im perfectly happy without kids. And to all the other couples who dont want any....YAY FOR YA'LL!!!

And for what its worth.....GREAT TOPIC! Its nice to vent to non kid adults...all my friends have kids and they act like Im the worst person in the world for not wanting any!

 

[maddhatir]

I havent read this whole thread, but the topic SCREAMED my name! Been married since 92, and Im 35 yrs old and me and DH do not have kids (our 4 furbabies are our kids). Back in 01 I got pregnant and lost it at 3 months. I was taking care of my disabled parents for the last 7 years and I think the miscarriage happened for a reason....of course I was ECSTATIC when I found out I was pregnant, and of course I was DEVASTATED when I lost it....fast forwarding to now...well last year I unexpectedly and suddenly lost my dad (we were EXTREMELY close) and now I am at a point in my life where it is just me and my hubby and our 4 animals and I am at peace. I dont want children now. I guess after caring for my dad and step mom for 7 years, it is time to me and DH. Selfish? Some may think so. But I dont care. Why I like NOT having kids? I like being able to get up and go when i want! I like the quietness in my home. I love going to WDW without kids ( I see the stuff parents go thru with kids....the aggravating stuff, and oh boy...). I just love the life me and my DH have with out kids. My step mom is in a nursing home (she had a brain aneurysm in 2000 and is incompetent-and BTW--my dad passed away from the SAME THING--ironic isnt it). Anyway, back to the nursing home....I go in there and it is HEARTBREAKING to see all those people in there and I wonder if me and DH will be in there one day because we have no one to take care of us when we get old.....BUT that is no reason to have a child....I wouldnt want me to be a burden to my son or daughter if I had one anyway. So alot goes thru my mind about NOT having kids, rather than HAVING kids.

Im perfectly happy without kids. And to all the other couples who dont want any....YAY FOR YA'LL!!!

And for what its worth.....GREAT TOPIC! Its nice to vent to non kid adults...all my friends have kids and they act like Im the worst person in the world for not wanting any!

Welcome!

I am sorry about your father and your miscarriage

And as I stated before- most of my friends now, say how jealous they are of us and that we made the right choice. Hopefully your friends will come around!

To me, it just seems like kids are just too much aggravation. I love my nieces and nephews, but, I like it when mom and dad are around to control the situation. I like to just step back when things get to dramatic

I told DH a long time ago (and he agrees 100%) there is NO way I want to share you with anyone- nor, do I want to have anyone take my focus away from him. I feel I would resent a child for that reason. We can be together 24/7 and not get sick of each other- It seems to me, that a lot of couple's relationships change when they have kids- and it never looks like it is for the better! You can see them in public and they look aggravated and just not happy. It looks .........sad........

They probably think no one notices- but you can see it!

 

[Shyvioletisme]

I told DH a long time ago (and he agrees 100%) there is NO way I want to share you with anyone- nor, do I want to have anyone take my focus away from him. I feel I would resent a child for that reason. We can be together 24/7 and not get sick of each other- It seems to me, that a lot of couple's relationships change when they have kids- and it never looks like it is for the better! You can see them in public and they look aggravated and just not happy. It looks .........sad........

They probably think no one notices- but you can see it!

DH and I always feel this way too...We really are able to spend all that time together and not get sick of each other and I never wanted/want a kid to take away from that...I too have seen too many couples changed when they have kids and it just seems like that spark is lost between them and they are no longer a couple but just mommy and daddy...that just doesn't seem like a good life to me...

 

[maddhatir]

DH and I always feel this way too...We really are able to spend all that time together and not get sick of each other and I never wanted/want a kid to take away from that...I too have seen too many couples changed when they have kids and it just seems like that spark is lost between them and they are no longer a couple but just mommy and daddy...that just doesn't seem like a good life to me...

ugh- I was watching Super Nanny one night and the husband and wife called each other mommy and daddy. .............creepy!

Needless to say- Jo was NOT too happy about that and told them to put a stop to it!

 

[BamaTigger]

Welcome!

I am sorry about your father and your miscarriage

And as I stated before- most of my friends now, say how jealous they are of us and that we made the right choice. Hopefully your friends will come around!

To me, it just seems like kids are just too much aggravation. I love my nieces and nephews, but, I like it when mom and dad are around to control the situation. I like to just step back when things get to dramatic

I told DH a long time ago (and he agrees 100%) there is NO way I want to share you with anyone- nor, do I want to have anyone take my focus away from him. I feel I would resent a child for that reason. We can be together 24/7 and not get sick of each other- It seems to me, that a lot of couple's relationships change when they have kids- and it never looks like it is for the better! You can see them in public and they look aggravated and just not happy. It looks .........sad........

They probably think no one notices- but you can see it!

Thanks for the welcome and the condolences!

I agree with you about the kid thing...my DH is the type that loves 100% attention TO him, and I know he is not the "selfish" type, but I have always thought that he wouldnt like the attention given to a child--or as much as I would have to give one.

But that is fine with me! I too think kids are aggravating..the school stuff, the activities....ech....Im just not too in love with the "soccer mom" thing.
We have boats, cars, motorcycles, and a nice home and we get to go alot (depending on work), and all my "friends" dont understand how we afford it, especially going to WDW 5-6 x a year, and well...WE DONT HAVE KIDS! I like spending money on ME, DH, MY ANIMALS, AND MY HOME..... I dont see why they should care where my money goes!! Jealous I think....

 

[maddhatir]

But that is fine with me! I too think kids are aggravating..the school stuff, the activities....ech....Im just not too in love with the "soccer mom" thing.

A friend of mine is pregnant for the first time. I said to her "you KNOW? you will soon have to become part of the "play date" scene?" She just got this sad expression on her face and said "but I don't wannnaaaaaa"

I said "too bad- I think it is a requirement, you have to hang out with all the other mommies"

She also said she will be a paranoid mom- running after the kid to put on her helmet and knee pads when she rides a bike. She said she will keep her inside to read books. I said, "yeah- you will probably put a helmet on her for that too" Of course, this conversation was all in fun!

 

[KirklandTutu]

I did a Google image search and is this what they look like?? Sorry the image is so large.

Nope, that's not it, I'll take a picture later and put it on.

 

[EJKorvette]

I saw this thread and had to weigh in, but can't read through all of the posts here at weekday work. Besides, I probably read it all before years ago on alt.fan.child-free, or whatever that newsgroup is called.

I am a fifty-one year old divorced man. I did the Dad thing backwards - back in 1983 I met a woman with three girls from her first marriage. We got married in 1984, and I adopted them in 1986. I left my exwife in 1991, and divorced her in '95 or '96.

My current girlfriend is sixty, has never had nor wanted kids. (She has six cats and two dogs now though).

We love driving up to the World when we can. We are fully aware that we will be surrounded by kids almost anywhere up at Disney. Even when enjoying the more adult attractions to be found at EPCOT.

Luckily no one asks us about kids! And my mom has given up on me remarrying and providing her grandchildren with my genes. (Luckily my brothers already gave her five grandchildren).

As for absinthe -

I have been intrigued by absinthe ever since I read about it in the Scientific American magazine article years ago.

I have tried to make a version of my own by soaking wormwood in hundred-proof vodka. I used to be in the SCA. I brought some of this to several Kingdom events, which resulted in "fairy puke" (the name a friend of mine gave it) being banned from the Kingdom. Any subjects of Trimaris reading this may remember "The Ballad of Imre the Evil".

I have mail-ordered Hill's and Logan-Fils from the Czech Republic. Don't know if I saw any green fairies, but I do know that it messed me up big-time.

Several years ago Saveur had an article about pastis, and mentioned a brand from California that came with an absinthe spoon tied to the bottle. I still use that spoon on the rare occasions I open my bottle of Logan-Fils.

I am looking forward to the stuff that the Wired article talked about, Tim (?) Breaux' brew that is on sale now.

btw loved the scene in Moulin Rouge with La Fée Verte (who looked very similar to a pixie we all know and love very well).

 

[Barthy73]

Here's one off my list of annoying things about kids (and their parents). Many items on my list have been shared many times in this forum.

I can't even rank these, but here goes:

#xxx annoying thing about kids: Using them as an excuse to miss a scheduled event!

My DW had a very well attended Pampered Chef party this week. 21 of the 24 people who committed showed up. The 3 who didn't magically had sick kids. Do they bother to call and let us know ahead of time? NO, of course not. If you're going to commit to something, do it, or don't do it, or have the courtesy to call. After the fact, "I'm sorry, my child was sick" is a very old, very overused excuse. It's almost as bad to me as, "My dog ate my homework."

Sorry, back to your reqularly schedule program now.

:::Steps Off Soap Box:::


BTW, hope you had a nice BD, Madd, sorry to hear it got rained out. :-(

 

[maddhatir]

I saw this thread and had to weigh in, but can't read through all of the posts here at weekday work. Besides, I probably read it all before years ago on alt.fan.child-free, or whatever that newsgroup is called.

Welcome!!!

Here's one off my list of annoying things about kids (and their parents). Many items on my list have been shared many times in this forum.
I can't even rank these, but here goes:

#xxx annoying thing about kids: Using them as an excuse to miss a scheduled event!

My DW had a very well attended Pampered Chef party this week. 21 of the 24 people who committed showed up. The 3 who didn't magically had sick kids. Do they bother to call and let us know ahead of time? NO, of course not. If you're going to commit to something, do it, or don't do it, or have the courtesy to call. After the fact, "I'm sorry, my child was sick" is a very old, very overused excuse. It's almost as bad to me as, "My dog ate my homework."

Sorry, back to your reqularly schedule program now.

:::Steps Off Soap Box:::


BTW, hope you had a nice BD, Madd, sorry to hear it got rained out. :-(

Thanks for the B-day wish!

.....did you have a bad day today and needed to vent!?

 

[PhotobearSam]

Here at our Cottage business, people send their kids to the office for matches all the time...I can't legally give matches to anyone under 16 yrs old...Do not scream at me because you were too lazy to walk to the office yourself. I do not hand matches to CHILDREN...


Rant over.

 

[KirklandTutu]

Ok, so who knows what this is?