Male sitter at KNO

[eeyore45]

Just my opinions, I'm glad you posted the book.

IF Ken is a teacher can they verify that? What about references? I think its a plus that you have 4 kids, and not one dd alone. Can you check up on Ken? Is he babysitting any other day on site that you can pre meet?

I could post horror stories, but you should work on a case by case basis, and just because he's a teacher, w know teachers have been in the news also - what grade does he teach? Did the school district do a background check?

I would hope that the service would welcome questions, as would Ken, unless they have something to hide...

 

[been there done that]

SuzieQMomof3: I wasn't asking anyones "permission" about who,(male or female) takes care of my children. I was simply originally asking if anyone had heard of Ken, the male sitter of KNO. Of course I would like to get advice on this topic since it is new to me and our children are NEVER with out me or my DH but thought it would be nice to get out w/ friends for 5 hours on our vacation. I did'nt realize the responses would be so divided so I'm sorry if I "struck a nerve" with you but I'm sure Disney would not have KNO working on property if there were problems.

jodifla:Thank you for your kind advice. I understand that this will be hard at first if we decide to do it but like you said; if our kids(the oldest 2 are 6 and 5 and will tell us EVERYTHING)like the sitter we decided on then we would request them every time and feel safe.(We go every year)

I know MANY people go with in room sitters and have heard many positive things about this program. We are not being bad parents. We are taking our children to Disney World because we love them and just want FIVE hours out of 8 fun days!!

 

[been there done that]

Eeyore45,
My friend and I have talked to the manager several times. I know he is a teacher but I don't know what grade he teaches or his background as a teacher. The manager of KNO did say Ken has been with KNO for three years and has had no complaints against him. He was very open to questions. Some sitters do not feel comfortable sitting for 4 children(especially two 1 year olds), but was informed by the manager that Ken was "excited" to do this. We're thinking of seeing if Ken AND a woman sitter could both come to our room. Four kids is hard for ANY 1 person! We would rather pay extra money for two sitters. You had some great questions and when we call we will ask more questions.
Thank You!

 

[SuzieQMomof3]

beentheredonethat-
I apologize for my rant and didn't mean to imply that you or your husband were bad parents. My comments were not directed to you specifically. I've just seen such a trend of parents who don't seem to have confidence and it makes me sad. You had stated that you were "very hesitant," "a little worried," and "pretty torn." I just wanted you to honor your feelings and not be either placated or horrified by other people's stories.

I've never heard a negative comment about Fairy Godmothers or KNO-I'm sure they are very reputable companies and if you choose to use them I truly hope you have a great time. They are your kids and your opinion is the only one that matters.

I've spent too much time on the soap box and I'm getting off now!

 

[bridegirl]

Not to seem like I'm walking both sides of the fence, but...

I totally agree that you have to follow your instincts. Love Gavin DB book - think it's crucial information.

But...we used Ken this past NYE week at the Poly and he was lovely. The first night (because I am paranoid like all moms) - I had him babysit in the connecting room to grandma's room - with grandma in her room listening and checking in occasionally. Then we had him back later in the week.

He was actually much better prepared and had a better attitude than some of the younger girl babysitters we met.

jmho...

 

[justhat]

I have a male friend I worked with at a day care who is great with kids of all ages. I recommend him to others as a great babysitter all the time and would leave my own daughter with him as well (we did last month at our wedding, but he was at the wedding too so it's not like he was ever alone, just needed someone to hold her when I couldn't).

With that said, we we on a Disney cruise last month and left our daughter, who was 3.5 months old at the time, in Flounder's Reef, the nursery for babies 3 months to 3 years old and it will be a very, very long time before I leave her again. We brought her one night as a test and she seemed happy when we got her after an hour. In fact she was so comfortable with the caregiver rocking her to sleep that she cried when I took her back! The next night we forgot to cancel (we booked each night as a backup) so we brought her anyway but it was so crowded we didn't leave her at all and took her to dinner. When we went back the last night we told them that if she cried (one little baby was there every night and crying) to page us and we'd come get her, but we didn't want her there crying. Well we ate dinner and got back in about 90 minutes and she was sleeping in her swing and they were weird about bringing her out to us. Finally they suggested that I go get her (which I was gonna do anyway if they didnt' bring her out immediately) and when I saw her sleeping in her swing her eyes were all puffy and she was doing the 'sniffle breathing' that they do after they've been crying for a very long time. As soon as I picked her up she began to cry again until she heard my voice and calmed down, but then continued sniffling until she woke up to eat. So even though we specifically said to call us if she cried, they did not. To me this is unacceptable as a 3 month old should not be crying so much that she can't stop sniffling for an hour. For fear that this would happen if I left her again, I will not be leaving her again for a very long time, not until she's much older and can enjoy her time with a trusted sitter.

 

[been there done that]

SuzieQMomof3: Thank you for your reply and apology. I am of course worried about anyone caring for our children. This is just our first time and it is scary. But thank you for your advice. We now realize that this is a touchy subject.
Bridegirl: Your the response I was looking for!! Thank you for your info on Ken. I'm so glad you responded. I feel much better knowing he was so good with your children! Did he bring age oriented toys and ask questions about the kids?


justhat:Sorry about your experience. It sounded like the first night went so well; but they definately should have listened to you about paging you if your baby cries. I would'nt want my kid's crying that bad. It's one thing if they just cry for a few minutes but I know that cry your talking about and it is unacceptable to make anyone cry that long. We are leaving our cell phone number for our sitter for the same reason and the better follow through!

 

[robmpg]

What probably happened is the person who booked the sitter service after you was told they had to go with Ken, and they probably freaked out about having a man babysit for them, so now they are asking around to see if someone else isn't so prejudiced against males.

I am better around children than my wife is, and she'd be the first to admit that. But, if a stranger was given the choice to pick between her and I who they'd rather have take care of their children, they'd almost always pick her.

 

[beaglebiz]

I would never consider having a stranger watch my children. I would not consider a "night out" with my DH at Disney. the reason we are there is to enjoy our family. soon, our children will be grown, and DH and I will be able to go out to eat alone, but for now, I stick to a family restaurant.
I think it is silly to think a female stranger would be preferrable to a male stranger to watch children.
My children are only watched by me, my DH and our parents, and in a pinch, my brother.

 

[SuzieQMomof3]

beaglebiz, I don't think your solution is practical. I'm glad it works for you, but it certainly doesn't work for everyone. What if the grandparents or extended family live too far away to sit? or are unwilling or unable? Do those parents never get a night out alone together? Doesn't every marriage need that? I may be wrong, but I'm guessing your children are young.

As the origial poster said, she just wants 5 hours out in an 8 day vacation. That isn't unreasonable. I think the services provided by Fairy Godmothers and KNO fulfill an important need.

It isn't silly to think a female stranger is preferable to a male stranger. In real life, a woman is less likely to harm a child than a man is. There aren't as many female child molesters and that isn't because they just don't get caught. Yes, I know it's sexist and unfair but that's the way it is.

 

[been there done that]

Thanks SuzieQMomof3. I think what Beaglebiz posted in very unfair. My dh and I work opposite shifts and have not one day off together. We do not have extended family that is willing to help us with our children. One of us is always with our children and I am not saying that's a bad thing; we love our children more than anything in this world but I do not have to explain myself to you Beaglebiz. You don't know me so please don't be so judgemental. Like SuzieQMomof3 said, asking for 5 hours out of 8 nights at WDW to spend time with just my DH is NOT a crime!!

 

[jodifla]

Beaglebiz, I don't understand that mind-set at all. We have lots of family time, but I make sure to take time for my marriage, too. My husband works from home and needs to get out once in a while. Luckily, he still prefers to go out with me! And dinner out with a 2 year old isn't really relaxing for anyone.

My husband and I have many lovely evenings out -- we have several trusted baby sitters, including now those in Orlando and Cape Cod, places we like to visit. At first, though, every one was a "stranger." (that's how everybody starts out!)

We get some time on our own, and my son gets to bond with some other adults.

I just dropped him off at his preschool, where he is just in love with his teacher. It's so nice to watch him grow up and enjoy new things and new people.

 

[disneymom3]

I think the big thing to remember on a thread like this is what kind of advice the OP is looking for. This OP was not asking "Do you think I am a bad parent for leaving my kids for a few hours while on vacation?" She is simply looking for some firsthand experience and insight. I am sure that she and her DH have not made this decision without giving it quite a lot of thought. Yes it is a little nerve wracking, but that doesn't mean that it should not be done. I am a bit nervous leaving my kids with the girl who lives down the street, but I do so at least once a week when my and DHs work schedules collide. I have also used the Fairy Godmothers and was totally pleased with the experience. In fact, DH and I decided that instead of taking a trip to WDW without the kids last year, we would just use the FG once or twice to have our couple time.

That said, would I leave my kids with a man I did not know? No, I wouldn't. I wouldn't even have a college guy who works with me and whom I have seen with kids and he's great, take care of my kids. The primary reason is that I have an 8yo DD and it just doesn't feel appropriate. (Don't ask me why it's okay to have a girl take care of my boys--I admit to some irrationality. ) The secondary reason is that which has been stated--there are a heck of a lot more offenders out there who are male.

For the OP, I would go with the Fairly Godmothers and ask for Vera. She is great! Or do a search and find the names that come up a lot. There are several who get mentioned on here regularly.

 

[Amirah95]

My DH said he wouldn't ever leave our DD9 with a male sitter. He's says that he's old fashioned and sitters to him are women only.

**This is another social issue and can get quite nasty.

I just think that when it comes to your children to go with what your heart says and forget about what's socially correct. If you don't feel comfortable with leaving your children with a man, then find another sitting service...I would. I wouldn't want to go out, leave my children and have my comfortability level at 0%...it takes the fun out of going out with the adults.

If my DD cannot go with us then we don't go without her.

 

[been there done that]

thanks disneymom3! I regret ever starting this thread. I did'nt expect it to turn so ugly!
I did call KNO today and ask about Ken. This time I got a diiferent person. She said Ken is in his mid 50's, very energetic, fun, sensitive; also a third grade teacher(he is used to being around groups of kids) She has never had one complaint about him. He babysat a 6 month old last night at one of the resorts and the parents called today and raved about him. She said she could send a female with Ken if we wanted but that it would'nt be necessary.
Like disneymom3 said, everyone is new at first, teachers, day care providers; it takes time to get used to anyone else minding your kids!

 

[ear_poppin]

KNO run all of the Kids clubs at the Universal Hotels as well. It seems like a big well run organisation with a reputation to protect.

Someone on the Universal thread had a problem and the manager is dealing with the problem personally.

For what it's worth I would not imagine a Company with such a reputation would jeopidise that.

However I think four kids of tender age is too much for one person. Insist on the second sitter for that reason...that is what you booked and that is what you want.

You may like to tell them that they are getting some bad press at the moment...so perhaps they would like to honour their agreement and send you two sitters so you can enjoy your meal without sitting there fretting.

Good Luck

Denise

 

[been there done that]

Thanks Denise!

 

[twinmomplus2new]

I am not going to get into the idea of whether this is an ok practice or not. As you said to each his own.
However I am a firm believer in a mothers( Gut feeling) If for whatever reason you are even minutely uncomfortable with this arrangement simply make other plans.

There was just an entire incident lately about a male care giver at One of the Family clubs. Who was abusing children. Not at Disney maybe a Bahamian club?

I switched off with another family member with sitting last time. And this time am considering the kids club at HRH. Now after reading the post regarding Campo Portofino. I am not so sure.

I do know that socially unacceptable or not, If (Josh ) Had been the one and only caregiver there. I would not have been comfortable leaving the kids there.

So I guess I am not much help. Just go with your gut feeling.

 

[Gabrielle]

SuzieQ, I agree with everything you wrote.

I haven't read the book you mentioned. But, after reading this recommendation in a magazine, I've repeated it a few times to both my son and daughter -- if they're ever lost and need direction (they're both teens) -- ask a woman, only.

I woudn't leave my young kids alone with a male babysitter I didn't know.

-Gabrielle

 

[SuzieQMomof3]

Thanks, Gabrielle, I appreciate your comments! I think that book is a must-read for all parents. Another poster, Dutchess, said that she gives it as a shower gift-I think I'm going to do that from now on. It has so many useful ideas in it, and it really makes you think about how you can keep your children safe by trusting your own insticts and teaching your children to listen to their own inner voice.

I have lent "Protecting the Gift" to at least a dozen friends and not one person has said it isn't right on target.

Boy, I had no idea this thread would take of like it did. Unbelievable!

Beentheredonethat, you'll have to let us know what you decided to do and how everything went on your trip.