If you buy the Disney approved batteries they will last for 20 minutes, or one parade whichever comes first.
Now my way is the best way, I call it the Tim Allen way. So on to Battery replacement 101 as done by a man for a woman. But mostly for a man.
First it's a road trip to Radio Shack. Get there, and ask the clerk for the following
· 6 feet of #22 American wire gauge cable 2 conductor non-shielded twisted.
· 1 roll of acid cord solder thin layered not the thick stuff.
· 1 temperature variable soldering gun.
· 1 part #270-408 2 AA battery holder with wires, get the one with wires cause you're a girl and you'll hate the soldering part, they all do its in your genes (Don't get all defensive on me ladies I'm just stating fact)
· Get two AA part number 23-149 Hi Capacity Nickel Cadmium Batteries, you can buy these at the Radio Shack battery section, even though James Doohan you know (Scotty from Star Trek) sold out is the battery rep for Radio Shack, and is claiming he finally got the power
. (sellout) but he is in his 60's and just married a girl in her 20's so there is some forgiveness there. (Go men hoorah) oops sorry continuing.
· Get a run of the mill battery charger that will hold two AA batteries.
Now mind you when you present this list to a Radio Shack employee they will most likely smile and just try to sell you a cell phone. We they see you are serious they will go into the back crouch into the fetal position holding on to this years catalog under the James Doohan shrine they have created and cry. Just wait a minute go back there and get them then tell them its alright and help them find the battery section, from there its one step at a time.
After a wasted day at Radio Shack you finally get your goodies home and its operation time.
First take the cover off by removing those little black thingies, also called screws the little X on the top means they are Phillips screws. (Named after the German scientist, and ex Marks brother Yankko Phillips) Note the process of removing then replacing the little black thingies is called Unscrewing and Screwing (A man type private joke dating back to invention of the screw discussed later in this text in detail, and which has nothing to do with what your thinking).
So now we need a tool for screwing and unscrewing (Stop giggling this is serious) the tool is called a Screw Driver
I'm assuming you have tools
everybody has tools, if you don't have tools you can't play, so go to Radio Shack and buy the 14 piece computer tool kit AKA Juniors little mad scientist kit. Catalog number 64-1990.
Now be proud as walk through your neighborhood hold that tool kit up high and yell at the top of your lungs "I am woman I have tools hear me roar" (See I kept it clean) what you really want to shout is "be afraid mankind I have tools and I know how to use them"
well okay enough of that.
Lets get started already
.
Place the patient on the table, and make sure the screws are facing you
(I feel like the lawn sod laying supervisor that had to keep sticking his head out of the window, and yelling green side up guys) Okay remove those black screw thingies using your new tool kit and the Phillips screwdriver.
Remove the cover and expose the guts, there you will find the battery compartment, and a note saying why are you in here only cast members can be in here. Don't worry about it push on remove batteries ***** Very important ***** notice that on the battery there a giant + this is not a religious symbol asking you to pray, it is the symbol telling you this is the positive side of the battery. On the other side is a giant - which is in fact the symbol for the negative side of the battery or the devil choose one and lets go.
Now that the battery is out of the way, you see before you two exposed terminals. You will need to solder the wires you just got onto these terminals.
But since I'm running out of time, I'll just abbreviate the process as only a man could.
Attach the wires to the terminals observe polarity, and connect the wires to the battery case, (if case was bought for a woman's use remove the she leads and solder onto it like a man) Insert the sellouts batteries after charging them of course because they are rechargeable batteries, but we're men so we knew that, and screw (men insert quiet chuckle here) the case shut.
Instruction for women would take much longer and would involve words like thingies, little silvery doodad, strip the wire ¼ of an inch using the OSHA approved tetracycline abrasive maneuvering device, and such, but since I'm almost out of time I had to hurry.
Now every time you want to use your light up pin, just charge your batteries and you go girl, but mind you the Disney suit type folks will follow you around and wonder why your battery isn't dying, if they see your home made contraption they will kick you out of the park unless you buy a years worth of batteries.
Lets see Disney batteries $5.00 and last 20 minutes. My way if you're a woman without tools, and had to buy some
$80.00 but battery is rechargeable and will last 1 million years. If you're a man and already had tools total cost $1.00 cause we used old batteries. and parts from neighbors discarded Speak-N-Spell that we picked up last month from the garbage. and were laughed at by the women. Unhuh!!!!!
Disclaimer:
Ladies I'm sorry I didn't mean it, it was a joke really I know most of you know how to use a screw (insert chuckle) driver.
Men we rock
yea high fives everywhere, we know what solder is and know how to use it
We may not stop and ask for directions, we know where to buy a GPS and figure it out.
Let the flames begin, If I know the women of this board I'm pretty much a dead man so in closing I would like to say it was real y'all, I regret that I have but one life to give for my DIS boards, Lauri's gonna eat me alive
(But Matthew will be here alllllll alone with me and mine so be nice)
You don't have to listen to them Ed.
