Lost my daughter to suicide

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This weekend is 4 years. FOUR YEARS, it’s unbelievable, inconceivable that I have survived. I keep picturing my Bri at 4. Then I think it’s 4 years closer to to us joining,

I have not thanked every post, but I have read and appreciate each and every. Please know I am not strong at all. I am the weakest limb on a tree, I am treading.

I start a new job on Monday, I am terrified, like what was I thinking. 🤷‍♀️. However my old boss says I can call her Tuesday in case it doesn’t click, and go right back.
❤Lots of Love ❤ you are stronger than you think, I am mom of a kid that had a rare cancer. People always said I dont know how you do it. It really came down to one step at a time and day by day.
Have a great day at your new job.
 


This weekend is 4 years. FOUR YEARS, it’s unbelievable, inconceivable that I have survived. I keep picturing my Bri at 4. Then I think it’s 4 years closer to to us joining,

I have not thanked every post, but I have read and appreciate each and every. Please know I am not strong at all. I am the weakest limb on a tree, I am treading.

I start a new job on Monday, I am terrified, like what was I thinking. 🤷‍♀️. However my old boss says I can call her Tuesday in case it doesn’t click, and go right back.

Thinking of you ... sending big hugs your way
 
Mommasita Im sending hugs and prayers your way. You are strong even if it doesn't feel like it. The compassion you show others in need on this board has made a difference to me and Im sure to many others. :flower3:
You are incredibly brave! :hug:
 


I hope your first week of work at your new job went well. Learning the million and one little and big things in a new job can be completely overwhelming. Everything takes time to learn. You go girl!!!! :cheer2:
 
I hope your first week of work at your new job went well. Learning the million and one little and big things in a new job can be completely overwhelming. Everything takes time to learn. You go girl!!!! :cheer2:

Thank you. It was very hard this week. I spoke to my old boss Tuesday, I thanked her and told her I wouldn’t be back. Thursday I’m nearly in tears, I sent her an email to see if I could change my mind 😞. I haven’t heard back. She must think I’m certifiable. New jobs are hard, I guess time will tell.
I am very overwhelmed, but it’s Our Thanksgiving here, so a long weekend to relax and unwind,
 
Thank you. It was very hard this week. I spoke to my old boss Tuesday, I thanked her and told her I wouldn’t be back. Thursday I’m nearly in tears, I sent her an email to see if I could change my mind 😞. I haven’t heard back. She must think I’m certifiable. New jobs are hard, I guess time will tell.
I am very overwhelmed, but it’s Our Thanksgiving here, so a long weekend to relax and unwind,
Here’s a big 🤗. Whatever you decide, may it bring you whatever you’re looking for. Please get some rest and enjoy your Thanksgiving!
 
Tomorrow. Tomorrow is my daughter’s 23rd Birthday. I wanted to close this thread, but I can’t, I just can not do it. I feel like that is just another way of making it like she never existed, she is over. She never will be. I wonder so much how much she would have changed in 5 years.

Although I appreciate the well wishes, please know this isn’t the meaning for this thread. It is my therapy, a way to speak my words, my thoughts, my heart.

I will be working, I’ve never worked a Birthday of hers since I’ve lost her, I pray for the strength to be able to make the day. My best friend called, suggested i do what I can, if I can’t, I can’t, that is all. I don’t do well with pity, so I don’t want to tell my boss why, if I can’t, I’ll just say I am not well, which wont be a lie.

Well then, thanks for letting me ramble.
 
Tomorrow. Tomorrow is my daughter’s 23rd Birthday. I wanted to close this thread, but I can’t, I just can not do it. I feel like that is just another way of making it like she never existed, she is over. She never will be. I wonder so much how much she would have changed in 5 years.

Although I appreciate the well wishes, please know this isn’t the meaning for this thread. It is my therapy, a way to speak my words, my thoughts, my heart.

I will be working, I’ve never worked a Birthday of hers since I’ve lost her, I pray for the strength to be able to make the day. My best friend called, suggested i do what I can, if I can’t, I can’t, that is all. I don’t do well with pity, so I don’t want to tell my boss why, if I can’t, I’ll just say I am not well, which wont be a lie.

Well then, thanks for letting me ramble.
:hug:'s

No closing this thread, that's right, mommasita. With you in spirit.
 
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