light at the end of the tunnel?

[parkers*momma]

I know this is the budget board and this is/isn't budget related but I spend 99% of my time on the budget board and consider you my friends.

For the past two weeks, I have sat or been there for my BFF as her husband unexpectedly passed away. He was admitted to the hospital with pnemonia (sp-brain dead tonight), developed URDS, put in a medical coma, and lastly, his brain started to swell, no brain activity and he was removed from life support. He passed away on 11/21/09 and was buried on 11/24/09.

My Dh was laid off on 9/4/09 and because of the wonderful help from these boards, we have 7 months of expenses put in the savings. (thank you!) With my job, we were surviving, laying back for Christmas, plus able to continue DH's heart meds because we had lost our insurance when he lost his job.

Last week, 11/16/09 DH started a new job! YEA!! He would be getting his first paycheck right at Christmas time, in three short months we would have insurance again, and things were lookng a lil brighter.

Today, my beloved DH suffered a heart attack while watching DD and I put up the tree. I called the squad and he was unconsious by the time they got him to the hospital. Luckily, he survived but is in CCU after emergency surgery to place two more stents in his heart (he had 13 now). I meet with the cardiologist in the morning to find out if he has to have open heart surgery as he told me tonight that is about our only option. He has already told me that no matter what he was ordering new meds...one is over $300 a month alone not counting the ones he is already taking. I'm not sure about the other med...I'll find out more on it tomorrow also.

I'm setting here crying my eyes out as I can't see the light at the end of the tunnel. We have a Santa Believer but the money we have been laying back for Christmas is going to have to go towards the meds as I have to maintain the savings incase he is off work for a long time. Heck, I don't even know if he will still have a job as he is on probation for 30 days. No insurance...massive and I mean MASSIVE medical bills facing us plus huge medication costs. Plus I think I hurt my friend's feeling as she called right after I called the ambulance and all I said is "I can't do this (talk) right now" and hung up. Complete stupid on my part! I've tried calling her a couple times tonight and she isn't answering her phone (dang caller ID). I know she won't be mad as soon as she finds out what was going on but right now, as sensitive as she is...I know she is deeply hurt and I can't go over to her house as she lives an hour away.

Thank you Dis Friends for letting me spew everything here. I'm just at a loss and knew you guys could help me see the light at the end of the tunnel. You guys have offered so much sound advice...I'm hoping you might have a lil for me.

Maddi

 

[kamikazecat]

WOW. I am so sorry you are having to go through this. I will keep you, your family, and your friend in my prayers.

 

[Tinker'n'Fun]

First and foremost:

I can't even imagine where you are right now. How horrible that this is all happening. I wish I could do something to help.

I know that your friend will definetely understand. Just breath and know that the situation will work out for the both of you.

Second, can you contact the RX company and get the meds for free? I know some do this. If not, ask the drs. (every single one you see) to get you samples from the reps. Contact all the agencies in your area that may be able to help. Even if they can only cover one month, that is one month closer you are to keeping your savings.

Once again, I am really sorry and I will pray for you and your family.

 

[kaytieeldr]

Plus I think I hurt my friend's feeling as she called right after I called the ambulance and all I said is "I can't do this (talk) right now" and hung up. Complete stupid on my part! I've tried calling her a couple times tonight and she isn't answering her phone (dang caller ID).

You want one of us to call her for you with a brief explanation? She won't recognize any of our numbers.

 

[mlittig]

Dear Maddi, I am so sorry to hear about all your troubles, you certainly seem to be having more than your share right now You will be in my thoughts and prayers. I pray for a smooth, speedy healing for your husband. Remember to take care of yourself so you will be available to take care of everyone else Please keep us updated, Mary

 

[parkers*momma]

First and foremost:

I can't even imagine where you are right now. How horrible that this is all happening. I wish I could do something to help.

I know that your friend will definetely understand. Just breath and know that the situation will work out for the both of you.

Second, can you contact the RX company and get the meds for free? I know some do this. If not, ask the drs. (every single one you see) to get you samples from the reps. Contact all the agencies in your area that may be able to help. Even if they can only cover one month, that is one month closer you are to keeping your savings.

Once again, I am really sorry and I will pray for you and your family.

Goodness I never thought of that! I just went to the plavix site and it directed me to "partnership in prescription assistance". I listed all of his meds...current and new ones and it brought up not only the Pharmaceutical Companies that might help but other organizations. Ohhh Thank you so much! I'm going to be working on those forms all night!

 

[parkers*momma]

You want one of us to call her for you with a brief explanation? She won't recognize any of our numbers.

Kaytieeldr what a generous and sweet offer. It's 1:00am here so I kinow she is probably already asleep. I'm going to try again in the morning and If I can't get hold of her, I'll PM you her number and name. Thank you for the offer that means so much to me!

 

[mom of 3G's]

I don't have any advice. Just wanted to say I'm thinking of you.

 

[IDoDis]

I'm so sorry for what you are going through. I hope your DH will have a full recovery. As far as the meds he needs, you should write a letter to your state senator's office (via email) asking for help. They may be able to direct you to an organization that can help you. I also think the idea a PP mentioned about contacting the drug reps for some samples is a good direction to go. Start with your pharmacist and the doctor who is seeing him at the hospital to see what they what they might be able to provide for now.

As for the gifts for your DD, get her on the Toys For Tots list. You can register online at
http://www.toysfortots.org/request_toys/toys.asp

If you belong to a church, contact your pastor or priest. If your DD is in school, contact the school counselor and let her/him know, as well. At my school we adopt families in need and provide Christmas gifts and a holiday meal for a certain amount of families.

Your BFF will still be your BFF. Try dialing *67 first and then her phone number immediately after. It will erase the caller ID for that call. If she doesn't answer, leave her a voice message or send her a text.

Good luck and to you!!!

 

[tink_lover]

Wow, I'm so sorry to hear about your husband. What a difficult way to start the holidays. I'm sure you will do all you can to keep the magic for your dd.

Most drug companies no longer have "samples". The assistance plans go according to household income. There are those separate organizations, but they may be difficult to work with - sometimes the funding runs out at the middle of the month and they may not be able to help until the beginning of the following month. I would definately involve your dh case (or social) worker at the hospital for assistance.

 

[angwill]

So sorry to hear of all that is going on. www.needymeds.com is where they list all the forms for medication assistance. I also know the salvation army sometimes will help with one month of medication. Now that I am thinking about it ask to talk to the hospital social worker and see if they can help in trying to get DH on medicaid so the hospital bills and medications will be covered. Since he has been out of work it should be available to him. Good luck to you and keep us updated on DH health and how things work out.

 

[bavaria]

I can't share any advice on the medical cost front, but don't let the worry of Christmas gifts for your daughter bother you.

Remember, right now you have the gift of your family still being intact. I know what it is like to have a father have so many heart problems and go through this over and over - as a child it is even more frightening, and the fact that he is still there for both of you is a gift.

If you focus on being together as a family over the holiday hopefully the stress about gifts will fall somewhat to the wayside, and you can focus on that bigger gift instead.

Sending you best thoughts!

 

[jam217]

I'm sorry to hear that you're going through all this. Sending you good thoughts and keeping you in my prayers.

 

[jpeppers]

I am very sorry to hear what you are going through! If you want to pm me your address and a list of things your DD wants for x-mas I would be more than happy to go on somewhere like Amazon and have an item sent to you for her. Let me know. Take care and I hope things get better soon.

 

[Tink-aholic]

FIRST THING MONDAY MORNING, you should contact DH's former employer. He still may be eligible for COBRA. The payments are expensive (though there is a percentage of relief sometimes available through new governmental programs because he was laid off), but they can backdate back to the date of last coverage (was it the end of the month in which he was laid off?). Even paying for full-coverage COBRA is better than paying those kinds of medical bills.

This is extremely time-sensitive, as you only have a certain number of days to apply after employment ends. You may get in just under the wire, depending upon when his coverage terminated.

Good luck.

 

[Swimalie]

You've gotten some great advice and I don't have any thing to add. Just sending good thoughts and vibes.

 

[beansmom]

oh, bless your heart. Your friend will understand...and Kaytie, that's a great idea.

Jpeppers, that's one of the kindest offers I've ever seen. It certainly helps restore my faith in humanity.

Thoughts and prayers with you, Parkers momma...I think you've gotta good advice. Just know that we are here...please keep us posted.

Hugs.

 

[branv]

I wish I had some advice regarding meds, etc, but I'm clueless on that front. But I did want to send you all the best hopes in the world. Also, just reading your thread I can see that you are clearly a strong woman, with a huge, generous spirit to not only take care of your family the way you do, but to still have the ability to keep your friend in your heart even during a very trying time for you. With such strength, I know you can get through anything. Your family is so lucky to have you.

 

[surfergirl602]

I'm so sorry to hear about your DH. Hugs to you and your family. Are these meds covered under the 4 dollar walmart list? what about state aid? since your hubby can't work right now, they may cover the medical bills for you. We had to do this when my hubby broke his back during a tractor trailor accident. They paid our back medical bills for the accident and his medications and traction.

Let your family know and see if they can pitch in for a few presents for your DD. You'd be amased at the generosity. It's there!

 

[princessmorgan]

I'm so sorry! Big hugs to your family and I pray for a speedy recovery for your DH! If you would like to PM me, too, I would love to send your DD something off her list! A kind Dis'er did something for me awhile back and I promised I would pay it forward! So this would make me very happy