Kid "leashes"

[jadelane1]

Sorry jbuey22, I totally disagree with you. I have taken both of my kids at 2 and will be taking the third this year at 2 1/2. They very much enjoy Disney at that age and I will never forget how magical it was for them.
With that said, I think you should do what is best for your family. Don't worry about anyone else. I have never used a leash but won't frown on anyone that does. I give my kids a firm warning when we get into the park. I tell my kids to stay with me and if they start to run off they get strapped in the stroller, end of story. They learned pretty quickly that there were consequences to their actions. Good luck

 

[mjkacmom]

Yes the leash things bug me, but not for the reason you probably think. First of all let me say that I think most of the problem is with kids that are too young. IMO 2-4 years old is too young to really enjoy or remember Disney. We are Big Disney freaks, but waited until my youngest was 5 before we went. We dont normally have alot of cash for a vacation every year, so we waited until my son was 5 and my daughter was 8. That first trip was sooo magical I will never forget it and neither will they. We mulled it over when he was 3 and just decided(because he was a active boy) that a couple more years would make things much more pleasant for ALL of us instead of having a nightmare or a vacation that is even a little bit of an annoyance that we would regret it. At the age of 5 and 8 our kids were the perfect age that we did not need to teather or harness, or even hold hands. Of course we would always go after school had started for the year too and crowds were much tamer at the beginning of October or mid september. NOW having said all of that I should add that our first trip also gave us 2 scares where we lost track of the 5 year old. First was at the Magic Kingdom and having the freedom we did where the kids were quite independent and no longer so boisterous, you very easily could lose track (which we did) after exiting splash mountain. We stopped for a drink of water from the fountain and he musta kept on walking. We lost him for close to an hour or actually about 45 minutes. I was disabled at the time and had a ECV and frantically swept the area speeding around looking for him, while the wife and daughter stayed in one place and continued to look for him and also contacted a Cast Member to get help. I found him eating an ice cream bar that a cast member working a stand had given him to stop him from crying. It was scary let me tell you and we made a mistake no doubt about it. But I still do not think I would use a leash. 2 days later we lost him at the merchandise store at the hotel. He asked if he could have a Buzz Lightyear twirling lollypop, which we said (Sure!!). Then after he got what he wanted(in his mind) he started walking towards the hotel room. We didnt even pay for it, we said "yes" you can have it and he was satisfied and started walking home. After 5-10 minutes of looking around the store, we realized (we did it again) and started our search. We looked at the food court, the arcade, etc.. every place where we thought he might be, but he actually made it all the way back to the room. Which was surprising because all of the buildings looked the same at the All Star resort at the time, and we had a long walk to our room. But he knew just where to go.. So after that tale, I am sure some of you might say that I could have benefited from a Monkey Backpack or whatever, (I dont actually think they had them (13 some odd years ago). And if they did, I am sure they were frowned upon and looked down to much much more than they are now. So yes, keep your family safe, Sure! No doubt! But really what benefit is it for a 2 year old to go to Disney. I never thought so, and I really feel sorry for the mothers who are carrying around an infant. That has to be painful. Even pushing a stroller all day has got to get old quick. I wouldnt do it. We saved our money until the kids were old enough to thoroughly enjoy the vacation. I stand by that even though I did lose my kid twice. But not because he was a runner. He had calmed down by that age, mostly it was our neglect and our first trip to Disney as well since our Honeymoon, so we were looking around and gawking as much as the kids. Plus my son was much calmer, but he was SO independent, that he would just do his own thing and wander off. I guess both instances would have been avoided with a leash, but I still disagree with them, and do not think they are the correct way to teach a child. YES maybe the best way to keep a child SAFE. Sure no doubt! But I wouldnt be showing off my family vacation pictures of me and my kids on leashes. I think that is humiliating and lazy. So lets hear it!

Hmm, parenting advice from someone who only has 2 kids (spaced apart in age), and yet managed to lose a 5 year old not once, but twice on vacation! And hasn't learned the art of paragraphs...

I had a runner (who had a twin sister), and the harnesses were really the only way I could take them out of the stroller when I was out alone with the children when they were young (2 ish). They did have the money backpacks in the stores, but ours had Elmo on them, and they LOVED them. How the heck do you humiliate a 2 year old?

Luckily, we were able to afford to vacation every year. The 3 youngest didn't get to WDW until they were 4/6, but my older 2 went when they were 2/4 (didn't need a harness because ds15 wasn't a runner, and there were only 2 of them anyway).

 

[rachael95]

I was just thinking about this the other day while trying to walk holding my 15 mo old DS's hand in the mall. We'll be at Disney when he's 18 months. He didn't want to ride in his stroller and wanted to walk. I had always thought leashes were terrible things - of course the majority of people I've seen with their kids harnessed were people who were ignoring their kids with the leash that tripped people 20 feet away. Only rarely have I seen people using the harness to keep a closer watch on their kids. But after my experience the other day, I was terrified of being in a big crowd with him and losing my death grip on his hand.

So I've started thinking of a harness or something that I could still hold his hand or at least teach him to hold the harness like the handle grip others use, but still have something attached to him to keep us from being separated if we're jossled. I guess, literally going back to the old phrase "leading him around by the apron strings." which is what mothers did many years ago. They'd tie their children to their apron until they were old enough to go on their own.

So what I'm getting at is, it looks like you have to be in the situation to really understand it. Like so many things in life.

 

[Nancy F]

I'd put one om my hubby if he'd let me. LOL. No way I wouldn't put one on a child. Better safe than sorry I always say. And I don't have any kids.
Nancy

 

[maxiesmom]

The benefit to taking a young child on any vacation is the enjoyment you get making memories together as a family. Maybe the child won't remember that they had a big smile for Mickey Mouse, but you will. Maybe the child won't remember how they played in the pop jets in Epcot and had a grand time, but you will.

If someone doesn't want to vacation with their children until they are older, I think they are missing out on A LOT. Makes me feel kind of sad for them.

 

[kellyjeanie]

Yes the leash things bug me, but not for the reason you probably think. First of all let me say that I think most of the problem is with kids that are too young. IMO 2-4 years old is too young to really enjoy or remember Disney. We are Big Disney freaks, but waited until my youngest was 5 before we went. We dont normally have alot of cash for a vacation every year, so we waited until my son was 5 and my daughter was 8. That first trip was sooo magical I will never forget it and neither will they. We mulled it over when he was 3 and just decided(because he was a active boy) that a couple more years would make things much more pleasant for ALL of us instead of having a nightmare or a vacation that is even a little bit of an annoyance that we would regret it. At the age of 5 and 8 our kids were the perfect age that we did not need to teather or harness, or even hold hands. Of course we would always go after school had started for the year too and crowds were much tamer at the beginning of October or mid september. NOW having said all of that I should add that our first trip also gave us 2 scares where we lost track of the 5 year old. First was at the Magic Kingdom and having the freedom we did where the kids were quite independent and no longer so boisterous, you very easily could lose track (which we did) after exiting splash mountain. We stopped for a drink of water from the fountain and he musta kept on walking. We lost him for close to an hour or actually about 45 minutes. I was disabled at the time and had a ECV and frantically swept the area speeding around looking for him, while the wife and daughter stayed in one place and continued to look for him and also contacted a Cast Member to get help. I found him eating an ice cream bar that a cast member working a stand had given him to stop him from crying. It was scary let me tell you and we made a mistake no doubt about it. But I still do not think I would use a leash. 2 days later we lost him at the merchandise store at the hotel. He asked if he could have a Buzz Lightyear twirling lollypop, which we said (Sure!!). Then after he got what he wanted(in his mind) he started walking towards the hotel room. We didnt even pay for it, we said "yes" you can have it and he was satisfied and started walking home. After 5-10 minutes of looking around the store, we realized (we did it again) and started our search. We looked at the food court, the arcade, etc.. every place where we thought he might be, but he actually made it all the way back to the room. Which was surprising because all of the buildings looked the same at the All Star resort at the time, and we had a long walk to our room. But he knew just where to go.. So after that tale, I am sure some of you might say that I could have benefited from a Monkey Backpack or whatever, (I dont actually think they had them (13 some odd years ago). And if they did, I am sure they were frowned upon and looked down to much much more than they are now. So yes, keep your family safe, Sure! No doubt! But really what benefit is it for a 2 year old to go to Disney. I never thought so, and I really feel sorry for the mothers who are carrying around an infant. That has to be painful. Even pushing a stroller all day has got to get old quick. I wouldnt do it. We saved our money until the kids were old enough to thoroughly enjoy the vacation. I stand by that even though I did lose my kid twice. But not because he was a runner. He had calmed down by that age, mostly it was our neglect and our first trip to Disney as well since our Honeymoon, so we were looking around and gawking as much as the kids. Plus my son was much calmer, but he was SO independent, that he would just do his own thing and wander off. I guess both instances would have been avoided with a leash, but I still disagree with them, and do not think they are the correct way to teach a child. YES maybe the best way to keep a child SAFE. Sure no doubt! But I wouldnt be showing off my family vacation pictures of me and my kids on leashes. I think that is humiliating and lazy. So lets hear it!

Wow, you sure have a lot of feelings about this.

Not sure if you realize, but the child in the OP is 3, not 5. Many people don't use it INSTEAD of teaching children, but more as a safety net while still teaching children not to run.

Also, if I waited until my youngest was 5, my oldest would be 11. I don't want to wait that long. It sounds like it worked great for your family though!

 

[Aliceacc]

I never thought so, and I really feel sorry for the mothers who are carrying around an infant. That has to be painful. ....

Why just the moms??

I guess both instances would have been avoided with a leash, but I still disagree with them, and do not think they are the correct way to teach a child. YES maybe the best way to keep a child SAFE. Sure no doubt! But I wouldnt be showing off my family vacation pictures of me and my kids on leashes. I think that is humiliating and lazy. So lets hear it!

I don't think anyone who buys a harness for a Disney trip is thinking of it as a teachble moment. I think it's more a matter of keeping those kids safe; they can teach them not to run under more controlled circumstances at home.

As to "humiliating and lazy" I disagree. But even if the opinions of others mattered to me, I would much rather be thought to be "humiliated and lazy" than to expose my kids to danger. I love them too much to care what others care of the safety measures I take.

 

[Dani784]

Wow...ok first to the OP: don't worry about what other people think. It's YOUR child and honestly, YOUR neck if something bad happens so you just do what you need to to keep your little ones safe.

That being said, kudos to all the PPs who have been supportive of keeping toddlers safe. As for kid leashes tripping folks, where are you finding some that long and how is a leash that long supposed to keep your child safe? I've only ever seen the little stuffed animal backpacks with the tails you hold. Those tails are no where near long enough to trip someone! It's only two feet or so.

I used mine just yesterday at the mall with my 17 month old. He likes to walk, I'd left his stroller at home, and he weighs 25 lbs so carrying him gets burdensome after a while. No one looked at me funny or if they did, I didn't notice or care. I know it keeps my son safe while protecting his arm. When a small child holds your hand they have to reach straight up. This causes loss of blood flow which is why they let go. Also, if they trip and you catch them by their hand, you risk pulling their elbow or shoulder out if socket. It's MUCH safer to allow them to walk with the safety harness that way if they stumble, they can catch themselves naturally and reduce their risk of injury.

So I'll always opt for the harness over hand holding. Now to the one who mentioned not taking young kids to Disney. First off, you have two children. Therefore you did no disservice to your eldest by waiting for the youngest to turn five. You have the "typical" family with the "preferrable" age spacing. Good for you. Too bad we don't all fit that mold.

My family has four children spaced two years apart. If I were to wait until my youngest is five to attend, my oldest would be nearing 12 and no longer in the "believing in magic" phase. How fair is it to make him wait 11 years to visit just so his baby brother is old enough to remember? (FTR, I went to Disney at barely four and remember plenty. I also remember falling down the stairs at 18 months so who are you to say what a child will or won't remember?) Not to mention that even five isn't old enough to ensure your child won't wander off as you pointed out. Looks like you could have benefited from a child safety leash a couple of times!

Kids wander. Whether they are runners or not, in a place like WDW they are going to be distracted and caught up in the magic and any kid of any age can get separated. So use the harness and you'll save yourself a ton of stress and you'll enjoy your visit all the more knowing your child is always with you.

 

[quagmire0]

Meh. I could club you over the head with my opinions on the subject, but what's the point? It's your kid and you have to do what you have to do. No one here knows your child like you do.

 

[cceandme]

Yes the leash things bug me, but not for the reason you probably think. First of all let me say that I think most of the problem is with kids that are too young. IMO 2-4 years old is too young to really enjoy or remember Disney. We are Big Disney freaks, but waited until my youngest was 5 before we went. We dont normally have alot of cash for a vacation every year, so we waited until my son was 5 and my daughter was 8. That first trip was sooo magical I will never forget it and neither will they. We mulled it over when he was 3 and just decided(because he was a active boy) that a couple more years would make things much more pleasant for ALL of us instead of having a nightmare or a vacation that is even a little bit of an annoyance that we would regret it. At the age of 5 and 8 our kids were the perfect age that we did not need to teather or harness, or even hold hands. Of course we would always go after school had started for the year too and crowds were much tamer at the beginning of October or mid september. NOW having said all of that I should add that our first trip also gave us 2 scares where we lost track of the 5 year old. First was at the Magic Kingdom and having the freedom we did where the kids were quite independent and no longer so boisterous, you very easily could lose track (which we did) after exiting splash mountain. We stopped for a drink of water from the fountain and he musta kept on walking. We lost him for close to an hour or actually about 45 minutes. I was disabled at the time and had a ECV and frantically swept the area speeding around looking for him, while the wife and daughter stayed in one place and continued to look for him and also contacted a Cast Member to get help. I found him eating an ice cream bar that a cast member working a stand had given him to stop him from crying. It was scary let me tell you and we made a mistake no doubt about it. But I still do not think I would use a leash. 2 days later we lost him at the merchandise store at the hotel. He asked if he could have a Buzz Lightyear twirling lollypop, which we said (Sure!!). Then after he got what he wanted(in his mind) he started walking towards the hotel room. We didnt even pay for it, we said "yes" you can have it and he was satisfied and started walking home. After 5-10 minutes of looking around the store, we realized (we did it again) and started our search. We looked at the food court, the arcade, etc.. every place where we thought he might be, but he actually made it all the way back to the room. Which was surprising because all of the buildings looked the same at the All Star resort at the time, and we had a long walk to our room. But he knew just where to go.. So after that tale, I am sure some of you might say that I could have benefited from a Monkey Backpack or whatever, (I dont actually think they had them (13 some odd years ago). And if they did, I am sure they were frowned upon and looked down to much much more than they are now. So yes, keep your family safe, Sure! No doubt! But really what benefit is it for a 2 year old to go to Disney. I never thought so, and I really feel sorry for the mothers who are carrying around an infant. That has to be painful. Even pushing a stroller all day has got to get old quick. I wouldnt do it. We saved our money until the kids were old enough to thoroughly enjoy the vacation. I stand by that even though I did lose my kid twice. But not because he was a runner. He had calmed down by that age, mostly it was our neglect and our first trip to Disney as well since our Honeymoon, so we were looking around and gawking as much as the kids. Plus my son was much calmer, but he was SO independent, that he would just do his own thing and wander off. I guess both instances would have been avoided with a leash, but I still disagree with them, and do not think they are the correct way to teach a child. YES maybe the best way to keep a child SAFE. Sure no doubt! But I wouldnt be showing off my family vacation pictures of me and my kids on leashes. I think that is humiliating and lazy. So lets hear it!

I really wanted to read your whole post.( I agree with harness of little kids) I like hearing peopples opinions wether i agree with them or not it's nice hearing others point of views.
The problem with your post is it was all bunched together. if you had used paragraphs it would have been much easier to read.

 

[srferson]

People who have never needed one will judge. And that's fine. Once they walk past, you'll still have a safe toddler and they'll go on and find a reason to judge the next person they see.

The people who have been there will smile.

Do what's necessary to keep your family safe.

I'm just going to be a bit picky with words here.

Some people who have never needed one will judge.

Some people, especially the people who have been there will smile.

So what I'm getting at is, it looks like you have to be in the situation to really understand it. Like so many things in life.

It looks like being in the situation can really help some people understand it.

We have no kids. But it's easy to see how different children can be. So I just don't get the people that say "I didn't have to use one. You shouldn't have to either. You just have to... blah blah blah *insert perfect parenting advice*..."

And it doesn't take much observation to see how those tiny little hands can slip from yours or how those tiny little legs somehow move your little guy at the speed of light or how difficult it could be to find your little one in a crowd. And even if your child is not so little anymore, if you have them attached to you somehow, I'm going to assume that you know your kid and you have your reasons.

Just wanted to put it out there that not all of us child-free folks are judging your parenting decisions. I see the harness and say 'That's a great idea. And darn that little monkey is cute!'

 

[Aliceacc]

I'm just going to be a bit picky with words here.

Some people who have never needed one will judge.

Some people, especially the people who have been there will smile.

...Just wanted to put it out there that not all of us child-free folks are judging your parenting decisions. I see the harness and say 'That's a great idea. And darn that little monkey is cute!'

You're absolutely right. My apologies.

 

[NotUrsula]

It always cracks me up when a poster here describes the use of walking reins as "humiliating" for a toddler.

Kids that age have been known to strip to the buff during church services and/or finger-paint car windows with their own poop -- I really don't think they have much understanding of the concept of humiliation.

It is a safety tool, and contrary to popular belief, they have been in use for hundreds if not thousands of years. Why do you think that little girl's dresses so often have a tie in the back? Now they are ornamental, but thase ties are a throwback to the days when all small children wore dresses, and those dresses came with what were known as "leading strings" a set of ribbons sewn into the side seams that could be used to help a child learn to walk, and more importantly, to tether that child a child a safe distance away from household cooking fires and farm animals. We tend to forget these days just how dangerous household chores and streets once were, and if mom kept a toddler under her eye, household fires and/or injury by a horse was a HUGE hazard.

I've told this story before, but back in the 1940's my mother once tripped on an uneven sidewalk, hit her head and lost consciousness while walking with an infant in a pram and a toddler on reins. The pram careened into traffic (and by some miracle was not hit!), but the toddler stayed put because the rein was looped on my mother's wrist. She could easily have lost both children that day, through absolutely no negligence of her own, but the reins quite likely saved my sister's life.

 

[mom18]

I will make a note that I have not read all replies..only a few...
You should do what makes you feel safe, and not what others think. All kids are different. My DS- I never needed to, nor have I ever used any harness with him. Even at a toddler age, he would never venture off. Partly of being too afraid, and partly because he is just very well behaved.

DD on the other hand, (2 yr old)...she knows where she is going, knows how to get there, and doesn't care what anyone says. The child runs everywhere. I have tried everything. One day we were in the mall and she ran off for the thousandth time, so we hid on her. The mall was empty, and she ran off to the corner of the mall, sat in front of a window and watched the cars outside. I sat there and watched her where she could not see me, hoping it would scare her enough not to do it again. (before I get any sort of bashed for this I was close enough to her that she couldn't see me but if anything happened I was close enough to be right there) She didn't care. She turned a few times to see if I was behind her, and when she realized I wasn't, just sat there and kept watching the cars.

Point being, especially with two children to care for, being in a huge crowded place for so long, with a toddler, I am all for harnesses where they need it. A toddler is not going to want to ride in a stroller all vacation, nor are they going to want to hold your hand. Toddlers crave independence, no matter where you are.

Go for the harness if it makes you comfortable

 

[samacita]

It makes me sad that there is so much poster bashing in the Families forum. You don't see it get this heated in the Dining, Resorts, etc. forums. People there are more willing to accept that opinions differ, without questioning judgment or character. I wish that type of respect would be applied here too, even in these controversial, hot topic threads.

 

[darnheather]

My daughter loved the monkey on her back.

She wore it even without the leash when she was much older. I bought it originally because we were travelling overnight by train (in seats not a cabin) and I was worried that while I was sleeping she'd get up and wander off. But we also used it while travelling by subway in Korea because that thing is scary (when they say the doors are closing THEY MEAN the doors are closing).

 

[darnheather]

It makes me sad that there is so much poster bashing in the Families forum. You don't see it get this heated in the Dining, Resorts, etc. forums. People there are more willing to accept that opinions differ, without questioning judgment or character. I wish that type of respect would be applied here too, even in these controversial, hot topic threads.

I find this forum (Disboards) to be the most hostile one I visit. I thought people who love Disney would be far less judgmental of all kinds of things, but the internet anonymity seems to bring out the worst in people. It makes me sad, but I try to skim those things and look for the positive.

 

[MeeskaMomma]

I find this forum (Disboards) to be the most hostile one I visit. I thought people who love Disney would be far less judgmental of all kinds of things, but the internet anonymity seems to bring out the worst in people. It makes me sad, but I try to skim those things and look for the positive.

I have also been surprised at this. It really is shocking. Although I haven't read any posts in this thread that seemed particularly rude, but I didn't read them all that carefully.

 

[Zooshoveller]

When our twins were 2-3 years old, they had the monkey backpacks with tail "leashes". DH used them if he took them to places like the zoo. One parent, two toddlers both easily distracted was a recipe for disaster. DH only clipped the tails on if the area was crowded. What irks me is to see one toddler on a leash with 6 adults accompanying the kid. Come on guys! Y'all out number him! LOL

But honestly I don't care. Do whatever makes you the most comfortable. You know what's best for your family!

 

[kfeather]

I got a runner on my hands. We are doing disney for the first time in September. Would I be looked down upon if I strapped one of those backpack leashes on my 3 year old? I also have a 5 year old but he's not a runner. My DS won't even let us hold his hand! He's on this independent phase which is great but when we are in a packed place I totally have trouble having him hold our hands or stay in the carriage. Does anyone else backpack their kids?

I have sworn never to use one... but I understand why others do. The only time I lost sight of my son recently was at Darth's Mall at Hollywood during Star Wars Weekend. Found him all teary eyed because he was afraid. He learned his lesson. Maybe let you kid think he's lost for him to learn to stay close.