My mother and her husband have been "renting" a house we own near Orlando. They moved into this house when we moved from Orlando to Tampa back in 1996. We don't have a written agreement, but they have been giving us $500/month. It used to be $575, but when the A/C went, they paid to have it replaced and we lowered the rent to $500 till we made up the repair bill. Needless to say, that was paid off years ago, but we kept the rent at $500. Now, understand that the mortgage, insurance, taxes and homeowners assoc. dues totals over $750/month, but we've been "eating" the difference so they could have a place to stay.
Well, we have a lot of equity built up in that house and we can't take out an equity loan on it because it is not our primary residence. So, with college expenses for our DD (17) pretty much around the corner, plus the fact that the insurance company is not renewing the house after it runs out in May because of hurricane risk, and the fact that we have a lot of debts we'd like to pay down/off, we have decided to put the house up for sale.
Well, the way my mother and stepdad are acting you would think we were throwing them out on the street.
You have to understand another fact. My brother passed away last August at 48 of colon cancer. Before he passed away, be got paperwork to change the beneficiary on his 401K from my mother to me (as executor of his estate, he wanted me to take all of his life insurance proceeds as well as the 401K and put it in trust funds for his 2 children). He never got the chance to change the 401K from my mother's name. So, she is "chafing at the bit" to get her hands on $35,000!!!. She even asked me last year at his funeral, if I had looked into the paperwork required for her to receive this money! AT HIS FUNERAL! I couldn't believe her.
She KNEW he wanted that money to go to his kids. He made her his beneficiary before he was even married and had any kids (by the way, he was divorced, so his ex-wife is out of the picture). Well, Mom doesn't care. She said the money's hers and she needs it. Even before we told her we needed to sell our house, she was anxious for this money. They have themselves so deep in debt, they weren't even going to be able to pay us another month's rent.
So, my sister and I tried to let her know that if she's going to get this money (which she is), that our brother really wanted his kids to have it (they are 18 and 17) when they turned 21. She said "they're getting enough money from his life insurance".
Granted, they're going to need this money anyway to find another place to live, but we're so afraid that they're going to blow it really fast. They are accustomed to living in a certain fashion -- they were living in our house which is a 3BR, 2BA, 2 car garage, central A/C, very modern for $500/month!!! They're not going to find anything like it for that money. So, the last I heard the first place they looked at was $2700/month. At that rate, that money's not going to last long!
She is now not on speaking terms with either of us. I tried to tell her that she shouldn't break her ties with the only family she has left, and that we were willing to help her find another place, but she's so stubborn and selfish.
Sorry, I went on and on about this, but it's been urking me to no end and my sister and I can't believe she's supposed to be our mother!!!
Well, we have a lot of equity built up in that house and we can't take out an equity loan on it because it is not our primary residence. So, with college expenses for our DD (17) pretty much around the corner, plus the fact that the insurance company is not renewing the house after it runs out in May because of hurricane risk, and the fact that we have a lot of debts we'd like to pay down/off, we have decided to put the house up for sale.
Well, the way my mother and stepdad are acting you would think we were throwing them out on the street.
You have to understand another fact. My brother passed away last August at 48 of colon cancer. Before he passed away, be got paperwork to change the beneficiary on his 401K from my mother to me (as executor of his estate, he wanted me to take all of his life insurance proceeds as well as the 401K and put it in trust funds for his 2 children). He never got the chance to change the 401K from my mother's name. So, she is "chafing at the bit" to get her hands on $35,000!!!. She even asked me last year at his funeral, if I had looked into the paperwork required for her to receive this money! AT HIS FUNERAL! I couldn't believe her.
She KNEW he wanted that money to go to his kids. He made her his beneficiary before he was even married and had any kids (by the way, he was divorced, so his ex-wife is out of the picture). Well, Mom doesn't care. She said the money's hers and she needs it. Even before we told her we needed to sell our house, she was anxious for this money. They have themselves so deep in debt, they weren't even going to be able to pay us another month's rent.
So, my sister and I tried to let her know that if she's going to get this money (which she is), that our brother really wanted his kids to have it (they are 18 and 17) when they turned 21. She said "they're getting enough money from his life insurance".
Granted, they're going to need this money anyway to find another place to live, but we're so afraid that they're going to blow it really fast. They are accustomed to living in a certain fashion -- they were living in our house which is a 3BR, 2BA, 2 car garage, central A/C, very modern for $500/month!!! They're not going to find anything like it for that money. So, the last I heard the first place they looked at was $2700/month. At that rate, that money's not going to last long!
She is now not on speaking terms with either of us. I tried to tell her that she shouldn't break her ties with the only family she has left, and that we were willing to help her find another place, but she's so stubborn and selfish.
Sorry, I went on and on about this, but it's been urking me to no end and my sister and I can't believe she's supposed to be our mother!!!
You have every right to vent.
