Just a vent about people bumping threads...

[1Prince2Princesses]

I think there should be an option for an OP to close thier own thread. I have started them before and wished I could close it but only a mod can do that and I found jerks can still go to old threads and stir trouble.

There totally should be this option. Then there wouldn't be an issue at all.

 

[DisneyPRPrincess]

I have to agree with you OP. I think it goes overboard sometimes. When it gets to the point of people posting the last time someone logged on, I think that has gone too far. Of course, that's my opinion only and other people are comfortable with other things.

I totally agree with you on that one. That is going a bit overboard.

 

[phorsenuf]

I do understand what you are saying. I am not talking about people asking 'what happened' for a little while after the OP disappears. I am talking about weeks going by after TONS of 'what happened/thinking of you' posts and then even more time going by and people bumping it again and again. Not only that, but continual updates on when the OP has been on the DIS without responding to the thread. Sheesh....it gets ridiculous.

In that particular situation than yes, let it go and send a pm or something because really at this point I think its more of a nosy thing than a concerned thing. Especially if it was particular juicy. That's just human nature.

But other threads (like the dog Gigi or the Girls Scout thread) I am interested in how that was all resolved. I found both of them to be kinda sad and was hopeful for a positive outcome. Do I really need to know if someone's having an affair 2 months after the fact, no, chances are by that time it's pretty obvious what the outcome is.

 

[poohandwendy]

Then they should prepare themselves for people asking for updates. Goes with the territory. The same way the poster of the sensitive information has the right to vent, the readers have a right to ask for updates. I in no way am saying that they should update if they don't feel like it. I think a simple "The situation is being taken care of. Thank you for allowing me to vent, and thanks for all the support and well wishes." PERIOD!

But if the OP doesn't do that, then that is when we get the BTT posts. I am sure if the OP had taken the time to think before posting, they probably wouldn't have posted that information. That is why I am of the belief, think before you post.

Sounds alot like 'Op is getting what they deserve for being so stupid to post a problem here'...doesn't sound much like "Really worried about you OP, hope you are well"

just sayin

 

[Southern4sure]

I really want to know how these people find these threads...

Anytime I do a search...I quit soon afterwards because I NEVER find what I'm looking for or nothing comes up at all.

 

[DisneyPRPrincess]

I do understand what you are saying. I am not talking about people asking 'what happened' for a little while after the OP disappears. I am talking about weeks going by after TONS of 'what happened/thinking of you' posts and then even more time going by and people bumping it again and again. Not only that, but continual updates on when the OP has been on the DIS without responding to the thread. Sheesh....it gets ridiculous.

AAHHHH...now the post makes more sense. And I agree. If the thread has no updates for weeks, then leave it alone. Totally with you on that one.

 

[poohandwendy]

Ok, just letting you all know I am running to the post office, the grocery store etc and I may not be back to this thread for hours...if ever. If I don't come back, no need to be concerned.

 

[meandtheguys2]

So, you don't want us stalking you? Geesh...take the fun out of our day!

 

[1Prince2Princesses]

Ok, just letting you all know I am running to the post office, the grocery store etc and I may not be back to this thread for hours...if ever. If I don't come back, no need to be concerned.

don't worry... we'll bump you

 

[I'mNoPrince]

All the OP has to do is ask the Mods to close it and they will.

Now the thread when closed can't even be viewed so that would solve all of this.

 

[DisneyPRPrincess]

Sounds alot like 'Op is getting what they deserve for being so stupid to post a problem here'...doesn't sound much like "Really worried about you OP, hope you are well"

just sayin

Not at all. I think people need to be a little more selective on what is disclosed to the public. The OP is the only person who is responsible for that. I am not one wanting updates. The way I see it, they will say what they want when they want. Some of those posts I feel are too sensitive to have been placed here to begin with. Wouldn't a Real Life Confidante be a better choice? (Hypothetical question). I say be careful of what you post because it might bite you in the you know what. I say think before you post, because you may regret writing something to the public when your emotions are under control.

NEver said that that the person is stupid. I mean post when your judgement is not clouded by emotions. We do things we regret later when we are overcome by emotions.

 

[Allison]

I think people need to be a little more selective on what is disclosed to the public.

I completely agree. I'm a private person by nature. It's hard for me to even talk to friends about things. So, seeing all the private things people post is amazing to me. It's just not in my pesonality. Not that that is the best way to be either.

 

[meandtheguys2]

Not at all. I think people need to be a little more selective on what is disclosed to the public. The OP is the only person who is responsible for that. I am not one wanting updates. The way I see it, they will say what they want when they want. Some of those posts I feel are too sensitive to have been placed here to begin with. Wouldn't a Real Life Confidante be a better choice? (Hypothetical question). I say be careful of what you post because it might bite you in the you know what. I say think before you post, because you may regret writing something to the public when your emotions are under control.

NEver said that that the person is stupid. I mean post when your judgement is not clouded by emotions. We do things we regret later when we are overcome by emotions.

Of course one should be careful, but when people are in a difficult or emotional state of being, they don't always make the best decisions. I don't see them "OWING" an update, or anything else. Sometimes you just have walk away. And hope that other's let it gracefully die, also.

 

[Sherri]

I just wonder if people are aware of the PM option?

There have been a few threads of sensitive nature regarding family issues that keep getting bumped up after weeks of the OP letting it die and I think it is really insensitive. If anyone is worried about the OP (or their family), or just thinking of them, why don't they just send the OP a nice pm?

To keep bumping the thread comes off as ambulance chasing to me. It rubs salt in the wound where someone really could just want to keep it to themselves or may have just forgotten about it or wanted everyone else here to. It really isn't our right to know the 'ending' just because someone happened to post a thread here in the heat of whatever is happening in their lives.

Maybe some people have walked away and just forgot to post an update, even still... wouldn't a pm be more appropriate than constant 'bumps'?

I dunno, I am certain to be flamed for mentioning it because obviously people are just 'concerned' about their 'friends'...but that is what i think the pm option was designed for. Anyone else feel this way? I just think it would be better to err on the side of caution, that maybe the OP doesn't want to get into it or has alot on their plate right now. That is why I think a pm is ore appropriate if someone is just concerned about them.

Ok, rant over...maybe I will get flamed and then walk away and one of my friends will bump this for me in a month or two...

Well said. I totally, totally agree with you.

 

[annegal]

There once was a thread where someone's relative had "disapeared" for a couple of days & she posted as they were all frantic.

OP gave a brief update , but then observant DISer found a news article about the incident and that relatives real name and location were given. Not good.

I could understand why someone would not come back with an update.

 

[lillygator]

That is the simple reason why items of a sensitive nature should not be posted on a forum of this size. People come on for sympathy, get it, and then when updates are requested people are left hanging. You've peaked peoples interest.

I personally do not put it on the same level as ambulance chasing though. Ambulance chasers happen upon a situation without an invitation. In this case the OP invited everyone into his/her world. Very different.

My advice would not go to the readers, but to the OP of these highly sensitive threads. Think TWICE before posting extremely personal items on a forum.

I agree....sure you can post a vent or whatever but you have to be prepared that this is a public message board. Does the OP have the right not to update, etc. Absoultely.

 

[Missy1961]

I really want to know how these people find these threads...

Anytime I do a search...I quit soon afterwards because I NEVER find what I'm looking for or nothing comes up at all.

Some of them probably subsribed to the thread, so it was easy to bump.

OP, I agree with you. I know the thread you're talking about, but it happens all the time with the "I think my SO is having an affair" kind of threads. I understand why people start those threads, but they really don't owe us an explaination. It's possible that some of these concerned people didn't know they could send a PM. I haved formed friendships here, so I don't doubt that some people were concerned, but I think others want the gossip. Just the nature of people, I guess.

And talking about bumping threads, there was an interesting example the other day--someone had bumped a thread about Halloween! I don't know how they found it unless they were here before under another name & wanted to stir the pot.

 

[DaisyD]

I think it is entertaining and funny to read all the "concerned" posters wanting to hear the ending of stuff. They try to pass off their "concern" as caring but we all know it is pure nosiness.

 

[Crankyshank]

I think there should be an option for an OP to close thier own thread. I have started them before and wished I could close it but only a mod can do that and I found jerks can still go to old threads and stir trouble.

That wouldn't help at all unfortunately. Instead of bumping the OP, there would be threads calling out to the OP and asking for status.

 

[oxfordcircus]

Ok, just letting you all know I am running to the post office, the grocery store etc and I may not be back to this thread for hours...if ever. If I don't come back, no need to be concerned.

I'm sending PD your way because Monday I went to the post office and they were closed. I was like "dang", then I remembered those automated stamp selling things. So I went in but the machine said it was out of stamps. I hope you don't have the same fate. I will be concerned about you until we get an update that they had the stamps you really wanted. In case your experience was as bad as mine, here's a link for you to find stamps: www. usps .com. It really helped me get through Monday.