Judging a Book by it's Cover *rant*

[kaytieeldr]

If you want to say I was referring to you, then so be it. (Obviously if my comment was about you or not, it struck a chord in someone that claims: "Things strangers say don't bother him/her." And for what it's worth, I wasn't the only one on here referring to someone here needing to learn empathy.
I never said that she should run home and cry every time someone says something to her but trust me when I say that if people were constantly judging you on something that you couldn't control and making it known to you rudely, it starts to bother even the toughest of us. Should she go home and cry about it? No, but saying she shouldn't let it bother her when you've never walked a day in her shoes isn't the answer either.

The CM outside Crystal Palace wasn't judging her in any way. She/he was simply doing the assigned job. Having even a severe limp isn't any kind of indication that the person has the multiple medical conditions the OP describes.

I also wouldn't describe the bus CM's reaction as judgmental, merely awkward and less than appropriate - but we know much more from this thread than any description the OP provided him. She probably would have been better advised to let him know she was having trouble breathing.

She herself describes being in tears - so, as lost*in*cyberspace stated: you can't control what others do; you can only control how you respond. Being in tears and going back to your room because someone who had no way of being aware of your issues does beg the suggestion, "get a thicker skin" or "change how you react".

 

[TwizzleMouse]

The CM outside Crystal Palace wasn't judging her in any way. She/he was simply doing the assigned job. Having even a severe limp isn't any kind of indication that the person has the multiple medical conditions the OP describes.

I also wouldn't describe the bus CM's reaction as judgmental, merely awkward and less than appropriate - but we know much more from this thread than any description the OP provided him. She probably would have been better advised to let him know she was having trouble breathing.

She herself describes being in tears - so, as lost*in*cyberspace stated: you can't control what others do; you can only control how you respond. Being in tears and going back to your room because someone who had no way of being aware of your issues does beg the suggestion, "get a thicker skin" or "change how you react".

I suggest you refer to my original post. I never said the CM did anything wrong at the Crystal Palace. And again, I never suggested her going back to her room was a good reaction. She would be better off to just move on with her day.
What I don't agree with is people who feel it is okay to make remarks regardless. You don't know someones situation so stop judging and just keep your mouth shut is the best way for people to go about it.
I love how people want to dismiss inappropriate behavior by the man working at the bus stop as well as several other posters.

Just like those saying the OP needs "thicker skin" others just need to learn to mind their business. Don't you have something better to do at WDW and other public places than judge other people?

 

[RobynPrincess]

OK, because I don't know a thing about these devices, I went online to research them because what y'all are saying make me 'very' nervous!

The articles that I saw say that anyone touching such a person when the device goes off feels 'nothing' or 'very little' so you would not be aware of it at all. The person 'with' the defibrillator would get the jolt and feel real pain for a 'fraction' of a second. This is very good news - maybe you 2 posters need to get better informed. It would not 'kill' or in anyway 'harm' a baby or anyone else. Can you even imagine if something like this was 'loose' on the unsuspecting public - no way would they allow this!! A lawsuit waiting to happen!

My mum has one of these pacemakers, and I just wanted to agree with you. At no point has she been told not to touch anyone or for people to stay away from her. Not sure where that urban legend came from!

 

[kaytieeldr]

I suggest you refer to my original post. I never said the CM did anything wrong at the Crystal Palace. And again, I never suggested her going back to her room was a good reaction. She would be better off to just move on with her day.
What I don't agree with is people who feel it is okay to make remarks regardless. You don't know someones situation so stop judging and just keep your mouth shut is the best way for people to go about it.

No, we actually do know this person's situation. She described it all clearly. One more time: she cannot control what other people say, only how she reacts. Either comments bother you, a lá the OP, or they don't, aka develop a thicker skin.

I love how people want to dismiss inappropriate behavior by the man working at the bus stop as well as several other posters.

Just like those saying the OP needs "thicker skin" others just need to learn to mind their business.

Well, you'd have to ask the Cast Members - those two people specifically described by the original poster as bringing her to tears - what better or other things they have to do. No guests involved, just Cast Members. And, again, the bus CM could have stopped talking after she briefly described her situation - so, inapproprate but not judgmental.

Don't you have something better to do at WDW and other public places than judge other people?

Advising posters to keep their respective mouths shut is bad judgment. While the OP hasn't been back, she did open the topic for discussion by, well, posting.

 

[TwizzleMouse]

No, we actually do know this person's situation. She described it all clearly. One more time: she cannot control what other people say, only how she reacts. Either comments bother you, a lá the OP, or they don't, aka develop a thicker skin.

Well, you'd have to ask the Cast Members - those two people specifically described by the original poster as bringing her to tears - what better or other things they have to do. No guests involved, just Cast Members. And, again, the bus CM could have stopped talking after she briefly described her situation - so, inapproprate but not judgmental.

Advising posters to keep their respective mouths shut is bad judgment. While the OP hasn't been back, she did open the topic for discussion by, well, posting.

It's interesting that you keep quoting me and telling me to go back and read, etc. How about you go back and read EXACTLY what I said.
I said that the people that were blindly walking by her etc and the CM's didn't know her situation (unless she was wearing a freaking sign that described it to them as she did us in her OP). So therefor they were blindly judging her without knowing her situation and that's what I said people need to stop doing (aka if you aren't informed on something keep your mouth shut). Is that clear enough for you now? I am now done with this thread. There is no reason that bullying the OP or anyone EVER should be acceptable. Sorry not sorry that I will stick up with a fellow poster or anyone who is mistreated and judged.

 

[mousehockey37]

I love WDW, it is my escape from all reality, and over time I'm sure you'll get to learn that about me! But... There is one thing that turns me away from Disney every... single... time.

I am young, 21 years old, and when you look at me I look like a perfectly normal 21 year old girl. And that's where most people are wrong. I actually suffer from multiple brain/neurological conditions, a heart deformity/disease, severe anxiety, arthritis, severe scoliosis, and many other things going on. I've had 2 brain surgeries, 2 surgeries on my left hip that needs a replacement (which they won't do because I am still too young for it to be covered), stomach surgery, and ENT surgery.
I also have spine surgery, heart surgery, and a possible brain surgery in my near future.
I fight for my life every day, but I manage, I am always in constant pain and always fatigued.

My DBF and I went to Disney in February and we had dinner at Crystal Palace. Everything was running pretty late and the waiter was nowhere to be found, but it was right before the fireworks. The fireworks are my thing! I can NOT miss the fireworks EVER! So after we finally paid the check we had 2 minutes to get outside to see the fireworks. We had been in the parks all day, and I was in the wheelchair, but I opted to experience the fireworks on my own two feet! (I can be very stubborn) When we got outside, we were in an apparent "walkway" and instead of a CM nicely telling us, I got screamed at. My DBF and I started to walk away to get out of the walkway, and I have an a very clear limp and cannot walk fast, yet the CM followed us still screaming that we need to move. Can you say embarrassed?! We went back to the room and I cried the rest of the night. Regardless, the firework show was ruined. WDW guest relations were very apologetic and I was fine. Not everyone can be perfect!

Then it happened again... We stayed this past week and I was confined to a wheelchair the entire time, I was just in the hospital for 4 days the week before for my heart not functioning correctly, and not getting enough oxygen.
One night, we decided to go to BLT to watch the Wishes firework show, since we had only seen the Hollowishes show this visit.
We had relaxed all day, I felt I would be capable of traveling there without the chair and feel some sense of normalcy in my favorite place in the world. We saw the show and decided to go to Boardwalk and explore a bit. We decided once we got to the resort, we would get a temporary chair and take a taxi back to our resort (AKL-KV). We took a bus from Contemporary to MK and transferred to a bus to BWV. While we were waiting for the bus to BWV, the line was really long. I kept squeezing my DBF's hand because I couldn't catch my breath, but I was okay. We got to the front of the line, and the bus was PACKED. There was no way I could stand on a crowded, moving bus so we decided to wait for the next one and lean on the rail, and try to catch my breath. (Yeah I know, I should've been in the wheelchair, but I told you I'm stubborn! :little angel:
After telling the person directing people onto the bus that we would wait for the next one, his exact response was "really?" We laughed it off and said yes we will wait. He looked at the people on the bus and said to them "Guess these two don't want to stand, whatever" then as the bus left, he says "why couldn't you stand? You're young" Not that it is any of his business, I said "well I've had two brain surgeries" He snickered and said "standing's good for you" and I just responded with "not for me" and said "well now you have to wait so."
Again... The embarrassment was unreal, tears welled up in my eyes and my DBF just held me.

I get the fact that I look perfectly "fine" but in reality, my body is very ill. I just cannot believe that this continues to be an issue for me, comments and questioning are so embarrassing. I didn't ask to be sick, I was born this way. I'm wondering if I need to start carrying documentation on me. Besides all of the dirty looks I get from guests while in the wheelchair, or kids asking their parents why do I get a wheelchair and their answers are "she doesn't want to walk" HA!

Sorry for such a long story, I guess the moral is as old as time, never judge a book by it's cover!

I know a lot has gone on here, but... as I am the DBF of someone who has a lot of internal medical issues, OP... Did your DBF stick up for you? Did HE say anything?

In a neutral tone I will say that the CM's are hard pressed to keep the walkways clear before, during and after the fireworks shows (2 years ago we had sat down on the curb in the hub at the corner where you cross the bridge to Tomorrowland. The CM was awesome but she was kicking people out of our area.. we had those last minute "stuffers" and she removed them... anyway, you could see she was under a lot of pressure and raising her voice was one of the only ways she could get the point across.) That said, don't take it personally on that. I understand your limp, but they're used to so many people walking extra slow and such to still have a "prime" spot and it clogs up a passage way.

As for the bus stop. If I were to wait for a bus, see it was full and say I'll wait for the next one, and someone have a comment for me (esp the bus driver).. I'd have responded, "well, if you drive like you talk, I'll be safer here" and then sat down and waited for the next bus.

I just would like to know what and how your DBF reacted. There's been times where I have had to step in and intervene with situations. Not because my gf isn't strong enough or whatever, but because sometimes it takes another voice who knows and can get the point across differently.

There's no reason you should ever have to cry sad or upset tears in Disney. Just because a few rude people are there, well, they're everywhere. Just think of what the bus driver would have said had you been in your wheelchair with a full bus of people that there was already standing room only on... You would've chased 3 people out of their seats, the driver would've had to go through all the steps to get you on etc, etc, etc...

To wrap it up, rude people are everywhere, you won't escape them. Find a way to learn how, when they want to snark at you, that you can smile, look back at them, say one or two things and make them hang their head in shame while you go on smiling about your day!

 

[Betty Rohrer]

from what her doctor told her, it is one with I think a defibrillator. doctor said it would react to others if touching when it shocked. only shocked the once while on bus and I think because other guest upset her. the other guest definitely felt as she moved back and said hey you did not have to shock me about it. guest was upset

 

[madaboutMickey]

OK, because I don't know a thing about these devices, I went online to research them because what y'all are saying make me 'very' nervous!

The articles that I saw say that anyone touching such a person when the device goes off feels 'nothing' or 'very little' so you would not be aware of it at all. The person 'with' the defibrillator would get the jolt and feel real pain for a 'fraction' of a second. This is very good news - maybe you 2 posters need to get better informed. It would not 'kill' or in anyway 'harm' a baby or anyone else. Can you even imagine if something like this was 'loose' on the unsuspecting public - no way would they allow this!! A lawsuit waiting to happen!

I went back and reread my post and corrected it. Left out the part about the defibrillator "malfunctioning".
.
I'll ignore your comment about "needing to be better informed" since you had no idea what a defibrillator was.

 

[kaytieeldr]

,

 

[kaytieeldr]

It's interesting that you keep quoting me and telling me to go back and read, etc.

Reiterating what someone else said isn't in any way telling anyone to go back and read.

The OP said nothing at all about people "blindly walking by her etc", so the veracity of this statement is suspect.

Cast Members encounter tens of thousands of guests daily. No reasonable person could expect them to be aware of any individual's invisible disabilities.

The OP wanted to appear "normal" in both incidents, then when she was, she got upset. Once again, one cannot control others' actions, one can only control one's response.

There wasn't any bullying. Inappropriate comments by one of the two CMs described in the two encounters, yes.

 

[momimouse27]

What a world we live in. Some people can be mean, and even though it's Disney there are still awful people, unfortunately.

I live with something similar every day. My son has autism. He isn't severe, and he's not nonverbal. He's actually very verbal! He covers his ears always because of the sounds(sometimes wearing earphones) and he tends to talk to himself...he plays out things he's seen or hears under his breath. There are good days and bad. But he loves Disney so much!

We get ugly looks, sometimes comments. People judging because he's different or has earphones on when we're out to dinner to block the noise. But I've grown a pretty thick skin, and I guess you just have to remind yourself you can't fix stupid! So next time you get one of those CM's, just smile real big, say "have a magical day!" Then turn to your DBF and say something we in the south like to use..."bless her heart".

 

[sunshinehighway]

Reiterating what someone else said isn't in any way telling anyone to go back and read.

The OP said nothing at all about people "blindly walking by her etc", so the veracity of this statement is suspect.

Cast Members encounter tens of thousands of guests daily. No reasonable person could expect them to be aware of any individual's invisible disabilities.

The OP wanted to appear "normal" in both incidents, then when she was, she got upset. Once again, one cannot control others' actions, one can only control one's response.

There wasn't any bullying. Inappropriate comments by one of the two CMs described in the two encounters, yes.

I agree with you. The CM near the Crystal Palace was just trying to keep the area clear. It can get scary crowded over there. The CMs working over there can't just assume everyone has a disability.

The bus incident sounds like a guy that thought he was being funny. Don't we all know "that guy", the one who has no idea his joking around is inappropriate or just plain old unfunny?
It's just not worth getting so upset over that you end up crying.

 

[spacecanada]

I think we all agree that the OP experienced an awful situation that shouldn't have happened in the first place, yet alone at WDW. Some of the other comments and bickering have got out of hand. Could a moderator please close/lock this thread?