Judge me!

[robinb]

Shows you how long its been since I've had an infant

Me too! The last time I used mine was in 2001 .

 

[luvmy3]

Me too! The last time I used mine was in 2001 .

Mine was 2000, I cant believe how long ago that was! I definitely agree with the pp on the fact that an unrestrained infant is safer in their own seat, I just don't think saying a person cant afford their trip is fair. Until the FAA bans lap baby's all together, families that don't buy a separate seat for their under 2 year old can still afford to go on their trips.
Interesting enough they don't ban them because they are worried those families would instead drive. Statistically that is more dangerous.

 

[bumbershoot]

I am open to judgement people, good or bad. My dd1 is horrible sitting still and we have a seven hour flight with her on my lap in two weeks. I can't afford a seat for her and I'll also be with a well behaved but needing lots of attention 4 year old. Oh, and alone with no other adult. Is giving benedryl to make the baby sleep absolutely horrible of me? She's had it before (she went 23 hours without sleeping and approaching hysteria) so I know she doesn't have any allergies to this. Be honest, but be NICE.

I dealt with a squirmy 17 month old on a 4 hour flight from WA to San Diego. I was a miserable, sweaty, shaking MESS at the end of it. (and please note I'm a strong-armed person who had pretty much carried and held DS from the moment he arrived; I had serious arm muscles and thought I could handle it)

My husband was there but couldn't help as he's a bigger guy without much lap for DS to play on, and definitely no space because the person in front of him put his seat back. There was no room there for DS. I had the window seat with DS.

When he finally FINALLY fell asleep, I still couldn't relax because I had to HOLD him. I'm also in the position of being short with relatively short legs, so I was on tip-toes to keep my lap flat; it was either hold him 100% with shaking, exhausted arms or make my legs exhausted and shaky to keep him on my lap while giving my arms a rest. He was so long, though, that arms were never totally at rest, unless I wanted his head on the arm rest.

It was MISERY. When we got to the airport and my brother picked us up I was nearly in tears.

And I spent the entire vacation DREADING the flight home. Why? Because I didn't want to do it again, but we had budgeted to the bone and could not afford a ticket for the way back for DS. So I had to do it again.

It made that vacation awful every time I thought about it.

Getting another seat is just not possible.

Then don't go. Seriously.

Someone said you're visiting grandparents? If so, beg them for money for the seat. Do what you have to do. Or don't go.

If she's an angel who somehow supports her own weight the whole flight and is absolutely a joy, then that's great. But you're not going to know if she'll be like that until you are on that plane. And that's a junky time to find out you've got someone who will be freaking out or squirming or kicking the seatback or etc etc for 7 hours.

I've been there done that, and I will NEVER do it again.

The fact is physics is physics and your arms cannot hold on to your child in te event of turbulence.


My opinion is if you can't afford a seat for everyone you can't afford the trip.

And she especially won't be able to hold the baby if she's been struggling for 5 hours, her arms are tired, and THEN the sudden and extreme turbulence hits. Especially when one hand shoots out in the "keep the 4 year old safe" position.

My opinion based on experience is that if a person can't afford the seat the person can't afford the trip. Or they, at the very least, need to budget for a seat for her on the way back, just in case she's difficult and the OP is having panic attacks about part deux.

I flew with my son on 7 or 8 hour flights depending which direction we were going, 8 times with him on my lap. I don't understand why people are saying lap babies aren't strapped in as my son had a seat belt around him that was attached to my seat belt on the plane. Its the same one they use for people who are too big to fit into the normal seat belt.

That's not supposed to be done. Just think about what would happen to him if there had been horrid turbulence, or if you had crashed upon landing (not from the sky, but like in a car accident once on the ground). Turbulence...with his own seatbelt in his own seat, he's between the unmoving seat and the belt. With YOU under him, he's got moving and much bigger YOU moving up along with him, squishing him into that seatbelt. If you're in the on-ground accident, you are moving forward into him and upward into him, and squishing him in more than one way. Honestly at that point I'd take my chances with airborne baby, hoping he'll land on a soft surface, or at least not between two things squishing him.

We're not supposed to buckle in a lap baby with us.

 

[Missy29]

Interesting enough they don't ban them because they are worried those families would instead drive. Statistically that is more dangerous.

While flying may be "statistically more safe, an infant strapped into a carseat is more likely to survive a car crash than if there was say major turbulence and god forbid but the mother was unable to hold on to the infant. It's just sooo much safer to have the infant in the seat, why risk it?

 

[luvmy3]

While flying may be "statistically more safe, an infant strapped into a carseat is more likely to survive a car crash than if there was say major turbulence and god forbid but the mother was unable to hold on to the infant. It's just sooo much safer to have the infant in the seat, why risk it?

I'm not disputing the fact that an infant would be safer in their own seat if something should happen on the plane. I am just passing along some info I found interesting.

http://www.faa.gov/news/press_releases/news_story.cfm?newsId=7381

According to the FAA, the safest place for a child on an airplane is in an approved child safety device, not on a parents lap. The agency encourages but does not mandate the use of child safety devices on airplanes because of the increased safety risk to families who, if forced to purchase an extra airline ticket, might choose to drive. The risk to families is significantly greater on the roads than in airplanes, according to FAA and National Highway Traffic Safety Administration (NHTSA) statistics

 

[Aliceacc]

I'm not disputing the fact that an infant would be safer in their own seat if something should happen on the plane. I am just passing along some info I found interesting.

http://www.faa.gov/news/press_releases/news_story.cfm?newsId=7381

I don't think anyone is arguing whether it's safer to be in a plane or a car.

The OP was considering giving her child Benadryl because she suspects the child will have a hard time being on her lap for a 7 hour flight, while she's also watching her 4 year old child.

Should the flight be routine, it will just be a very long day for everyone, including the other passengers and that one year old.

But should something go wrong, that child will be safer in her own seat.

And mom would never be able to live with herself had her choice to spend money on Disneyland instead of another seat had tragic consequences.

Skip Disney, get the extra seat, and have a wonderful visit with your parents.

 

[DOREEN1779]

I don't think you're a bad parent at all. You wouldn't have asked anyone if you were. I hope everything works out well for you all and you have a wonderful trip!

I agree. Back in the day, dabbing a wee bit of brandy on a baby's pacifier was acceptable....If in doubt, ask your pediatrician.

 

[luvmy3]

While flying may be "statistically more safe, an infant strapped into a carseat is more likely to survive a car crash than if there was say major turbulence and god forbid but the mother was unable to hold on to the infant. It's just sooo much safer to have the infant in the seat, why risk it?

I don't think anyone is arguing whether it's safer to be in a plane or a car.

The OP was considering giving her child Benadryl because she suspects the child will have a hard time being on her lap for a 7 hour flight, while she's also watching her 4 year old child.

Should the flight be routine, it will just be a very long day for everyone, including the other passengers and that one year old.

But should something go wrong, that child will be safer in her own seat.

And mom would never be able to live with herself had her choice to spend money on Disneyland instead of another seat had tragic consequences.

Skip Disney, get the extra seat, and have a wonderful visit with your parents.

I'm not sure why you decided to quote that and comment. I know exactly what the OP asked about and already "judged" her situation. The post you quoted was pointing out to the pp who quoted me, what I found interesting in the reading I did about why lap babies aren't banned. Threads often evolve, the first person bringing up the fact that the baby shouldn't be on a lap did that, I just added my .02 cents too.

 

[Freesia123]

Just to be clear, my parents ate meeting us there. So DL is the whole point.

I also travelled alone with them on a five hour flight two months ago. I know what I'm getting into. My kids are good travellers, they are very well behaved. i was just wondering if it would be a good idea for her or not. I'm going with not.

 

[fabulousfive]

I would never give my child the medicine. I know moms who have definitely done this and I've always strongly disagreed with that thinking. With that said, I think you will be fine with special drinks or nursing (to help ears), snacks, books (my DD loved books when on planes), toys, maybe even your phone or iPad with shows loaded on it. I never let my kids watch anything until they were 2, but in this case you could make the exception. Bring a tiny pillow or blanket and maybe she will sleep a little. I have travelled many hours with lap babies over the years (by myself) & it's always been okay. Have fun and try not to worry about it too much.

 

[Gracie09]

I'm not disputing the fact that an infant would be safer in their own seat if something should happen on the plane. I am just passing along some info I found interesting.

http://www.faa.gov/news/press_releases/news_story.cfm?newsId=7381

The NTSB has published a great rebuttal to the FAA position that more people will drive if forced to purchase a seat for their infant. Its very interesting reading.

http://www.ntsb.gov/safety/children.html

Also take a look at the sled tests of children on parents laps.

I would also research how cozy the airlines are with the FAA (they get to choose their own safety inspectors and have had some disciplined or even fired if they find problems).

You know my mother said she had a similar discussion with my grandmother (her mil) about car seats. My grandmother thought she was silly to buy a carseat for my sister when they werent required. After all she didn't have one for her kids and they all lived.

 

[katiee37]

I personally wouldn't give a child medicine not medically needed, and I personally would buy them a seat although I can totally understand if finances don't allow for that.
Any of the previous posts about things to do on the plane with the kids would be ideal IMO. Check out the threads filled with links to coloring pages and travel games. Much of this conversation has been about the one-year-old but you're going to need to have stuff to do for the four-year-old as well. I liked the one comment about playing up the older sibling's helper role. Even something as simple as getting a book out of a backpack would immensely help you and make the four-year-old feel good about themselves for helping out. Engage her in conversation about what she's most excited about in Disneyland, what she wants to tell her grandparents that I'm guessing she hasn't seen in a while, etc.
Make sure to bring familiar pillows, blankets and stuffed animals with you, however many your packing situation will allow.
And if one or both of your children start acting up, focus on them and not on other people, to be honest. Any plane bound for the Orlando area or the Anaheim area is bound to have several kids on it and other passengers (hopefully) are aware that things like crying children are almost unavoidable.
Sending pixie dust and hugs your way for a safe and happy trip!

 

[DocWes]

i agree. Back in the day, dabbing a wee bit of brandy on a baby's pacifier was acceptable....if in doubt, ask your pediatrician.

+1

 

[sweetcreams]

The op aske for opinions and my opinion is if you cannot afford the money to but a seat for your child you cannot afford the trip. Yes the FAA does not require seats for infants but the airlines have some pretty powerful lobbies. The ntsb and aap can't require seats but as I said the physics stay the same in the air as on the ground. Logically it also doesn't make sense that and infant is the only thing not strapped down during a flight. If it wasn't a child but a twenty pound bag o shoes one your lap the fa would require you stow it safely before take off and landing and during turbulence. My hold deserves as much protection as a bag of shoes.

Why would the airlines lobby against requiring an infant to have his own seat? Wouldn't they stand to make more money if people had to buy a seat for their baby?

 

[luvmy3]

The NTSB has published a great rebuttal to the FAA position that more people will drive if forced to purchase a seat for their infant. Its very interesting reading.

http://www.ntsb.gov/safety/children.html

Also take a look at the sled tests of children on parents laps.

I would also research how cozy the airlines are with the FAA (they get to choose their own safety inspectors and have had some disciplined or even fired if they find problems).

You know my mother said she had a similar discussion with my grandmother (her mil) about car seats. My grandmother thought she was silly to buy a carseat for my sister when they werent required. After all she didn't have one for her kids and they all lived.

Thanks for the link but I don't think I'll be doing any more research as I'm not planning on having any babies in the near or distant future
Again, I'm not disputing that a baby would be safer in their own seat if something should happen on the plane. However, the fact is, it is allowed, and the OP and anyone else are free to make their own decision on whether they will hold their infant or purchase them a seat. If on the OP's flight the seats are $250 and she has $500, she, her 4 year old and her infant can all afford to fly to DL and meet up with grandma and grandpa.

 

[maxiesmom]

Why would the airlines lobby against requiring an infant to have his own seat? Wouldn't they stand to make more money if people had to buy a seat for their baby?

Not necessarily. Some may decide to drive instead of fly.

 

[cfriend416]

Why would the airlines lobby against requiring an infant to have his own seat? Wouldn't they stand to make more money if people had to buy a seat for their baby?

Because then they risk parents choosing to drive rather than fly if they can only afford a seat for themselves and not the baby. If they allow lap babies they will at least get the $ from a parents ticket.

 

[DocWes]

Your pediatrician may know of something other than Benadryl. Or you could check with one of those natural "health nut" stores, they might have something that makes you sleepy......I have a co worker who is always taking root of something or leaves of whatever.

 

[sweetcreams]

If that were the case, the airlines would still be offering discounts for children, not spending a bunch of money lobbying for lap kids. JMHO of course.

 

[maxiesmom]

If that were the case, the airlines would still be offering discounts for children, not spending a bunch of money lobbying for lap kids. JMHO of course.

A discounted ticket is still not as good as free.