Journey back to ME!!- I'm getting bugged!!

[toystoryduo]

Hi Julie,

I love your idea of exercising your way to the Port of Tampa! You're off to a great start!

Congratulations on losing 1.2 pounds! That's great that the scale is moving in the right direction. Keep up the good work!

Hope you have a great day tomorrow!

 

[goldcupmom]

7/24 - Day 29/322 days (or Less) until GOAL
(OS) - n/a (NS) - n/a WW 7/19 - 175
July exercise 1230/1800
I'm going to get to Port of Tampa B4 7/27/08 19.77/1769.56 = 1749.79 miles to go

fiber one bar(2)
pretzel(5)
turkey(1)
ice cream(4)



Haven't gotten a chance to WI this week as I've been up & out too early. After DD & I walked on Sunday I got sick & spent the rest of the day tied to the bathroom. I think it was the sour/fake sweetener in the crystal lite tangerine/lime slurpee. That or something I ate on Saturday REALLY did a number on me. Yesterday I still wasn't back up to par. And today it seems after a 2 mo hiatus TOM is valiantly trying to make an appearance(and I'm not even leaving for FL ) . Wonderful!

I'm having problems getting pics onto this computer - DS18 had all the cameras set for HQ and there's several gig worth to transfer. And, I'm very computer challenged! Eventually.....

Today's agenda is to get started organizing for Ebay for fall/winter - which means messing up my clean upstairs. Oh well... Spent an hour paying bills this morning, need to take DD to work & shopping before so will leave soon. Not much else will get done. I'm going to TRY to visit some journals this evening....I feel like such a CAD for not getting to them often!

 

[bekkiz]

I'm sorry you're not feeling well

Good luck with all of your plans for the day (such a bummer you need to mess up your upstairs!), and have a great day!

 

[tbstein]

Hello Julie.

You are such a busy woman.

Sorry you had the bug. It has certainly been going around here.

How was the respone with the different cakes? Sounds like even with the wet floor, it all went well.

I agree on the driving stuff. DS was too confident, but end up doing just fine.

Good luck on walking to Tampa!

Wendy

 

[CACruisin']

she came home now having decided that top speed on cars should be 10 mph "anything above that is scary", and that Reverse is not necessary - just make lots of turns. Then yesterday morning as I was taking her to Drivers Ed she told me she thinks driving will be like bumper cars - she "can't straighten those out after turning, either". Quite frightening!!!

I'm so not looking forward to this part of the kids growing up!

Sorry you didn't feel well over the weekend, but glad you are better now. Silver lining - no calories can stick around on days like that .

 

[goldcupmom]

quickly popping in to let you know I'm still here. DS21 issues, TOM issues, life in general, topped with a lovely dose of pre-birthday blues has had me wanting to do & doing NOTHING!

Got up this morning & decided I needed to knock it off. Logged onto the computer, went to google to look up something about Shedd aquarium for DD & the computer went BLACK! Worse than the blue screen of death it seems. So, DH just left to take it to a computer place - it's almost 6 yrs old I think we should just get a new one...but he likes it - small as it is! But he never uses it....at ALL!!! He leaves tomorrow for Phoenix for the week, so I'll be alone doing the kid runs, Hormone He!! , dealing with DS21 & the 'birthday blues' & all without my computer. I'm on the laptop now, but really don't get along well with it!

So, I really am not sure when I will be getting to journals or really posting. And, maybe all our cruise pictures, family pics, etc, are GONE as the back up drive I got DH for Christmas last year is still sitting in the box - too much trouble to plug it in the USB & let it run...... This happened when our old computer before this one died, too! GRRRRRR!!!!!!!!

So, you can probably guess I'm in a WONDERFUL mood! Food has NOT been good & I'm really trying for it not to get any worse. Didn't make WI this week as I had to run DD to work. Don't think I want to go next week!

Deep in the heart of taking Ebay pics - fortunately, they're still on the camera!

More later from 'not so sane' New Mexico...... Hope everyone is having a better week/weekend than I!!!

 

[traceycooper]

Oh dear Julie, i'm sure things will get better soon!
Hope your feeling better after your illness
I hope you havnt lost your pics, that would be so sad, i'll keep my fingers crossed for you.

 

[toystoryduo]

Julie....Sending prayers and your way.

 

[tbstein]

Oh Julie! I have never seen the black screen, but I can sympathize. In the first year we had our current computer it crashed 5 times. And, since then once, I had to replace the hard drive because it was making noises, and I didn't want it to crash without me being in control. Ha, like that will ever happen. I don't know of anyone who is really in control of their computer!

Sending hugs and pixie dust to help with the rest of the week.

Take care!

Wendy

 

[keenercam]

Oh, Julie, I am so sorry you are going through all of this. I hope that the hard drive can be recovered on the computer. UGH! One of my biggest fears!

I am kind of glad your DD is appropriately intimidated about driving. Mine just had and still has no idea of the dangers and that is very frightening to a mom, too.

Sorry you are going through rough times with DS21. It seems to me things should get easier at some point, but waiting for it to happen is just so frustrating. Just when you think they are stepping up to the plate and becoming more responsible you realize you may have had too much faith in them. :

Hang in there, Julie!

 

[goldcupmom]

This will end up a LONG post, and I'll keep editing/adding in between working today. I'm back, have a new computer I'm trying to get set up/used to. Food has been horrific...... details to follow......

Or maybe it won't. Every time I write a long addition, it tells me I can't post on this. GRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!. Maybe third time's a charm!


Ok, last time I was here was 7/28. Typical Saturday only less sleep, more running. Then I find more drug stuff in DS21 roomful of GARBAGE (& I'm NOT exaggerating! Can't see the floor AT ALL) DH really doesn't care. DH, DD & I had plans to go see Harry Potter after DD got off work. Instead, DH decided to go w/ DS21 to see Simpsons. Ended up meeting DS18 & his GF & her sister's there. After HP DD & I went to Starbucks as it was chilly - had the top on the bug down & it even started to rain a bit. Starbucks was OUT of Decaf Coffee!!!!!! So, I texted DS18 & told him to tell DH that we should have my bday cake (ice cream cake that DH had bought then yelled @ me & threw things from the freezer as it wouldn't fit) since we would all be home. This is at about 10:30 p.m. & I'm NOT a night person, so it was not my idea of fun, but..... I got no response. DH then calls me to ask where we are & I explain. He says DS18 is down the hall, still at the movie, waiting for the girls to get out of the bathroom, but that DH doesn't want to walk all the way down the hall. So, I call DS18, No answer. Call the GF &she says his phone is dead. He fusses, but ends up having them bring him home. DS18 is now angry that I've interrupted his evening & we end up cutting the cake & wolfing down a piece in about 10 min so DS18 & DS21 can both leave. fun, fun, fun.

So, Sunday arrives & I decide to let everyone sleep so I can have some peace & quiet. About 10:30 DD comes down to the laundry room & tells me DH is MAD that we're not doing anything for my birthday. I end up telling him that if he wants we can go to the casino for brunch(I had a free coupon) & maybe play the slots as I knew he had been wanting to. About 12:15 he finally is ready to leave. I get in line to get the voucher for my coupon & he disappears. 20 min later he returns & tells me he'll come sit with me while I eat as his "tummy" isn't feeling well. So, no brunch. But, he wants to sit & play slots, just not near me. I hand him his $40 & off he goes. I sit down & 15 min later I have $17 extra & I'm ready to leave. Finally find him & he's almost used his $40 & is mad at me for being ready to leave after only 20 min. So, I wander some more, lose most of the $17 extra, & find him again. It's now almost 2 p.m & he has the airport shuttle coming at 3 to get him. He doesn't want to leave.

Get home & he says we need to do presents & cards. Fine. I sit around & no one says anything. at 2:55 he rushes in w/ 4 cards (all written by him - 3 w/ kids names on them) & a starbucks card. 3:10 the shuttle still hasn't arrived & he calls. While on hold, a taxi pulls up. He sends me out to see if it's from the shuttle company & it is. He stays on hold, tells me to take his suitcase & put it in the trunk, he gets in the back seat & leaves w/o telling anyone goodbye. That REALLY ticked DD off!!

By this time, I'm angry, hurt, & ready to eat anything in sight. Then DS18 & DD want chinese, so I order for us & DS18 gf & pick up. Eat more than I should & DD & I watch a movie & go to bed.

Monday, my birthday, was no better.... Up at 6, went to the thrift store w/ DD complaining non-stop. Starbucks for Breakfast. Dropped her at work at 11 & went home thinking of a nap. Phone wouldn't stop ringing - creditors for DS21 (who has almost no income as it's not hockey season, is still spending on things I'm sure I don't want to know, & has overdrawn his account by many $100s) About 1:00 I get a text message from DS18 girlfriend's older sister wishing me happy birthday. I respond honestly to thank her& tell her that she is the only one who has so far remembered. She responds that that's horrid. 10 min later I receive a text from DS18 saying "happy birthday n00b". He vehemently denies that she reminded him (until she admits it in front of him).

For well over a week I had told DS18 & DD that we would go to ITZ for my birthday since DH would be in Phoenix. I had a coupon for free birthday buffet & they could play video games while I veg. I putz around waiting for DS18 to get off work at 4:30. 6:15 arrives and he finally walks in & announces that if we want to bring something home he'll eat it, but he won't go out. He's going to the GF house in a bit to help them set up their router. I was LIVID!!!! DD then fusses that I don't matter to her or I'd go w/ just her. Well, she would sit & complain that she didn't want to go play games alone & I didn't want to, thus DS18 needed to come along. Plus, he likes the place & I was paying!

After 30 - 45 min of the arguing I finally walked out crying. Told them I had a husband & gave birth to THREE kids & I would think they could spare one evening to do something with me on my birthday. It's not like they can't predict when my birthday is & plan ahead for it. DD chases me in my car & hops in. We drive about 10 min & go back home. Another 45 min passes & they finally agree we will go to Flying Star to eat - it's now pushing 8 p.m. I eat mac & cheese followed by a HUGE slice of chocolate mousse cake, go home, go to bed & literally cry myself to sleep.

 

[goldcupmom]

Tuesday Morning, up at 6, called the computer place at 8 (DH had informed me that I needed to handle it). The tech who had left DH the message was going to be late. Went to register DD at school. Told that she needs a tetanus shot in DECEMBER 2007, but they won't let her register without it. Send us out to a health services van to get a shot. Wait in more lines & they give her a shot BRUISING her arm. WAY too rough!

Finished registering. Called the computer place & the guy won't be in at all, they looked up the info & said the hard drive is dead (DUH) but for ANOTHER $150 they can run a program to MAYBE get something off it. No guarantees & even if they do get something, it may be only bits & pieces. But for $100 + $150 labor, $160 set up they can replace the hard drive w/ anothe 60 gb. NOT!!! $410 to put in a small hard drive on a 6 yr old computer, $560 if we want them to see if anything is salvagable, + the fee DH had already paid for them to look at it.

Ended up dropping DD at work & meeting my friend (yes my ONE friend I have here after 6 years - NOT KIDDING!) at the casino. I walked out with $61 extra & she with $35. Picked DD up, we ended up having DQ ice cream waffle bowl sundaes for dinner, along with taco bell.

Wednesday DS18 & I spent the day computer shopping & running errands for him. Went to UNM to sign for the Testing office to let the Scholarship office know his GED scores as they never got them the first time (this is TWO buildings away on the same campus) & he wont' get credited the tuition for first semester w/o it. Bought 2 of his 4 books. 1 class the prof. forgot to turn in a book order, the other isn't published yet.

After about 6 hours, we bought an HP computer at Sam's. 22" monitor & it is a TV-PC so I can sit here & talk to y'all & watch TV at the same time. It was the very best deal & cheaper than many of the smaller non-TV computers on sale. After DS18 went to work DD & I spent the evening trying to clean my 'office' & remove the old computer.

Thursday I set this computer up, kept having to run out for different cables, etc. Dinner Wednesday was RioGrande Mud Pie ( lots of chocolate) & coffee. Thursday dinner was ColdStone Creamery Ice cream

So, do you see the pattern????? STRESS.....EAT......STRESS......CHOCOLATE.....STRESS.........EAT.........

I've been really down in the dumps, my weight is, I'm sure, skyrocketing, but I'm almost at the point I don't care anymore.....

Thursday night DH got home about 10:45. I had tried to go to sleep about 9:30, but no luck. Too hot (our swamp cooler only works on low fan - but there's nothing wrong) & I was having a horrid hormone day - hot, cold, hot, cold, heart racing, etc. 11:30 DH was ready to turn in, so tried again to sleep. 12:00 DS18 comes in, 1:00 DS21 comes in, 2:15 Mia needed out, 5:15 Max needed out, 5:40 Chick Fil A called & wanted DS18 to come in on his day off.. I wasn't too nice to them!! 6:00 alarm went off.

I let DD sleep til about 8:30 then she & I went to Kohl's before dropping her at work. After I picked her up we went to the mall. Tax free weekend here. Didn't really NEED anything, but was looking for deals. I ended up with a great pair of cargo jeans from Kohls size 11/12, a Speedo swimsuit from Mervyns for $14 for the gym (if I ever make it back), a skort size 10/12, a dress size 10 from Mervyns - working on it fitting right, but for $8 I couldn't leave it. At Penny's DD got a $180 formal for $14.99 and we got a really cute pair of dressy sandals to share for $10 that were $50.

She also got a couple pair of jeans for school.

This morning she drove with the driving instructor for the first time. Finished all but the interstate hwy driving & parallel parking in an hour. Drives again 8/30 they're that full up.

While she drove I went to a few garage sales. Got DS18 a new tennis racket & cover for $5 & a bag of juniors clothes for $.25 each. A couple things for me, a couple for DD, a couple for DSis & maybe a couple for DS18 girlfriend. Cute name brand stuff all like new.

DD is at work now & DH is at work. I took DS18 in at 5 & I will get him at 2, bring him home then pick DD up at 3. We want to go to the farther away Kohl's as she's looking for the skirt bottoms that match her Nike bikini. She has the boy shorts.

My living room is still mountains of Ebay clothes. I'm SLOWLY getting the pics done, but it's too hot during the afternoon & too dark in the evening, so that leaves me mornings to do them. Plus, I've not gotten the software loaded yet so I can edit them & get them online so I can list. When I finally can I'm really going to have to hit it hard!

Off to pick DS18 up. Hopefully I'll be visiting journals soon. If not, PLEASE know that I'm still thinking about you all & missing you!!

I went to a few GSales.

 

[AmyBeth68]

You definitely need a hug. It's a little late...but Happy Birthday Julie. I'm sorry you had such an awful week . Hang in there. I know things are tough, but maybe just getting into a workout routine will help a little with your spirits *shrug*. But with your busy schedule I'm not sure how you ever fit it in .

Again.... You deserve it!!!!

 

[ScoJo15]

Hi Julie

Sorry things have been so tough there for you...and, like Amy, I know it's late but Happy Birthday! Just know that it won't be so difficult forever and you just have to power through...things will turn around soon...I certainly hope this week is a good one! Hang in there

 

[toystoryduo]

Oh Julie...

I'm sorry that the past few days have been rough. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

Please do something special just for you today.

Happy Belated Birthday!

Have a great Tuesday!

 

[keenercam]

Happy belated birthday, Julie! And just because we understand how badly you just sometimes need junk food, here is some for you!

BTW, if you ever decide to ditch your unappreciative family, we have a nice guest room and our fur baby would love a playdate with your furbabies!

I bet you are really looking forward to ToT, aren't you? It's a shame it's not a solo, pamper-Julie-silly kind of trip.

 

[goldcupmom]

FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL!!!!!!

This summer has been horrid in that I have been able to have NO schedule at all. Thinking on this, I think it has been the cause of my HORRID eating & lack of exercise. I haven't known from hour to hour most days who was where, what I needed to do/when, who would be around to eat & when. Haven't been able to complete any task w/o interruption to have to haul someone somewhere.

Today I should go to WI but I'm not. I'm not stepping on a scale until Monday. The next few days I'm focusing on organization, getting my eating under control & beginning to exercise again. I've walked (still finding all the places I've recorded the miles) but not fast or as regularly as I need to.

I'll figure out where I am on days til cruise a bit later - I'm so lost!!!!

DS21 situation is not better. Driving me INSANE & I'm carrying all the stress in my neck/shoulders so I'm really out of sorts. As of 8/1 he was overdrawn by over $500. His check on 8/3 was only for $380 for 2 weeks. He doesn't see anything wrong with spending what he doesn't have. So what if he bounces a check for a $4 pack of cigarettes or McDonalds? They only charge him an extra $29 for it!!!!!! Between that, my phone ringing all day with his creditors calling, having almost no dishes/silverware(all in his garbage dump room which I won't touch), DH attitude that basically "we know how he is", the knowledge that drugs are likely again in the picture, the stuff I need to get done and I'm not able to due to stress - which causes more stress, and lack of sleep due to ridiculous heat coupled with night sweats, I'm basically a MESS!!!! Someone needs to come KICK me in the BEHIND!!!!!!

SO, I'm trying to get back into a schedule/routine. In an effort I bought a new big page planner last night to try to keep my food/exercise/life in on one page. Plus, I'm getting tired of everyone here thinking I do NOTHING all day everyday!! I don't get a paycheck, therefore I don't count.


Amy, Scott, Tracy, Cam - thanks for hanging in there with me! I can honestly say that there are days when I sit down at the computer & cry because I see that there really are people who care out there....somewhere! And I know that this journal is NOT a fun place to visit lately!

I still haven't made hotel res. for TOT. DD now has BOTH knees hurting nearly constantly & I'm not sure she will be able to come. I'm not good at doing things alone, so I can't say yet if I'll for 100% sure make it.

There's more, I'm sure to write, but I must get moving.

8/9 -

ww yogurt w/ fiber one(1)
panini(6)
ww toffee bar(2)
fiber 1 bar(2)
hot dog(3)
panini(6)
toffee bar(2)
fiber 1 bar(2)

vitamin / calcium
60 oz water, 46 oz diet sunkist
20 min elliptical(.72)

 

[keenercam]

I still haven't made hotel res. for TOT. DD now has BOTH knees hurting nearly constantly & I'm not sure she will be able to come. I'm not good at doing things alone, so I can't say yet if I'll for 100% sure make it.

Julie -- I guarantee you wouldn't be alone!

 

[Amy&Dan]

Hi Julie, first of all Happy Birthday!!! I am so sorry your birthday was less than stellar. Sometimes Mom's birthday gets lost in the shuffle and it really stinks when it does. I am also sorry about the computer (had that happen a year ago, not fun I know) and that ds21 is having these financial problems and that you think drugs may be in the picture. That is all just so much to handle so hang in there and do your best, thats all anybody can do! I hope things look up very soon. The food and exercise are going to get way better now that school has started, I am right there with you on that. I hope things are better today and do know there are lots of people who care about you just as we love the fact you care about us and are there for us in our lives!

 

[goldcupmom]

Thanks Cam & Amy! It really helps to know that y'all are 'somewhere out there!"

Last night was a typical 'no sleep' night. Bed at 9:30. 10:30 DS21 came up to let us know when to wake him & woke dogs. I moved which triggered hot flash. was finally nearly cool at 10:45 when another hit. Almost cool at 11:15 when DS18 came in from work. Repeat cycle until about midnight when I got up to potty and triggered #5. I was still awake then until almost 2 a.m. Up at 5:45. Is it any wonder I'm so tired????

DD did NOT have a fun day at school yesterday. Pasted is the letter going to several in the school/district (easier than relating the story again)

Our daughter R has informed us that she can no longer be in the Concert Choir. She says that you called all of the 10th grade girls in individually and told them somewhat different reasons for making them leave, without ever having heard them sing a note. She was told that the choir was “overcrowded” and that “ALL” of the 10th grade girls would be moved to 4th block Treble (beginning) Choir. Also, you told her that after all the problems surrounding the death of Mrs. T, that the 10th graders still needed time to “heal” and to “support” each other.

After the meeting, a few of the 10th grade girls were allowed to remain in the Concert Choir. Apparently ‘some’, not “ALL” of the 10th grade girls were told they would have to move to 4th block - “IF they wished to remain in choir at all". Since none of the 10th grade boys were moved, it must be deduced that the boys and the few girls who were allowed to remain (some of which were the ones MOST affected by Mrs. Troy’s death) do not need time to “heal” nor the support of their peers. How this determination of which students need “support” and “healing” time was made without having met with the students remains a mystery. I, personally, assisted the substitute in the Mid-High Mixed Choir for several weeks following the death of Mrs. T, and can attest to the fact that, while deeply affected, these students are amazingly resilient. The six students who remain are the ones who live what has become Mrs. T’s song “How Can I Keep From Singing”. For 1/2 of them yesterday became “the day the music died”.

RRHS scheduled these girls into the Concert Choir. They have all been in choir for several years through the RR Public Schools. Their schedules were set by the school who obviously knew how many students they were placing into this choir. To move them now would mean that they would have to be put into ‘leftover’ classes, probably changing at least some of their other classes and their lunch schedule. The time for this was PRIOR to scheduling, PRIOR to issuing schedules to the students. NOT the first day/week of school.

R actually ADDED the 2nd semester of choir at registration as she truly wanted to be in the Concert Choir all year long. The counselor at registration assured us that she could be in Concert Choir all thru RRHS and still manage to take all of her required courses. We were also told at that time that after classes started changing classes was not a viable option as most of the classes are filled to capacity.

To have done this at this time, without having auditions of any kind for ALL of the entering 10th grade students, and without a consistent reason to ALL of those involved, is, in our opinion, unconscionable and unacceptable. It is a shame that of the SIX then 8th grade students who remain from Mrs. T’s New Mexico Honor Choir, only one girl and the two boys are allowed to continue in Concert Choir

Needless to say DD is devastated! If there were a legitimate reason to give the kids the 'boot' she could accept that, but not arbitrary!

So, as typical, today should prove interesting.

DH is still driving the van - with no tail/brake lights. He was pulled over on Tuesday night, but won't bother to check. Won't ride his cycle. So, I can't get my bug in to have the 'check engine' light checked out & a new headlight put in. If he doesn't leave the van for me soon, I'm gonna have to rent a car just so mine can go in!

No clue what food will be today as it's another unpredictable day. Didn't fix dinner last night as I hadn't heard when/if anyone would be home. DH arrived after 6:30 & was NOT happy. Well, when he typically gets home around 5, I can't plan real food to be ready sometime over a 2 hour span! DS21 never knows how long he is working & may or may not come home after. DS18 worked til close & DD ate right after school......This is NOT a restaurant!! If I know people will be here, I will cook. But if I have no clue or it's just me, forget it! There's frozen food + other stuff available!

This weekend I MUST finish the Ebay pics so that on Monday I can start listing again. This stuff is about to take over my house!



8/10 -

34 oz water