Joe got busted and I almost peed myself

[RickinNYC]

It's a busy time of year for me at work, seems everyone on the planet wants to volunteer this Christmas and help out our clients (homeless adults). Yay for us! It's a pretty awsome, heart welling feeling but boy, you volunteers wear a boy out! LOL!

Anyway, I got home from work around 8:30 last night, tired, hungry and just plain ol' pooped. Normally Joe greets me at the door, Bill bounding and hopping his doggie greetings, butt wagging to and fro with excitement (Bill not Joe). This time I got nothin'. No bounding or hopping, no "Hi honey", just nothing.

Curious, I tossed my briefcase on the couch, hung up my coat and kicked off my shoes. I walked through the apartment and saw light coming from the guest room. Whispered mumblings were uttered, I heard boxes being moved, the crackle of paper. As I walked down the hall, the mumblings became recognizable. "Bill, move your fat butt." "Get out of my way, I have to put this back." "Get your paw off the box." All whispered, all in hushed tones.

I stepped into the guest room and there's Bill, snuffling and sniffing at the pile of Christmas presents I had recently wrapped. And there was Joe, picking up each box, fumbling with it, holding it up to the light, grunting and moving on to the next one. Again, more fumbling, moving, shaking and grunting. Bill was happily moving from one box to the other, grunting his irritation that it wasn't a giant Beggin' Strip, or simply trying a box on for size in terms of a good sitting spot.

I leaned against the doorway and just watched the two buffoons, both of them clueless. Clearing my throat, Bill immediatley looked up from his perch on the largest of the boxes and bounded my way in greeting, his tongue lolling about, big rootbeer brown eyes sparkling, paws ready to smack into my... erm... parts. Joe, on the other hand, dropped the box he was bobbling around, shrieked LOUDLY like a little girl with ringlets, hands fluttering around his chest, cheeks turning a shade red brighter than a Christmas bow.

All I could do, upon seeing his embarrassment/utter horror at being busted, was laugh. Shaking my head I just left the two of them to put away the presents as I headed to the kitchen. Joe soon followed, his face still a bright crimson, babbling, "I was just... I mean... sorry... they're right there you know... I'm sorry... but... you mad?... THEYWERERIGHTTHEREANDIWANNAOPENPRESENTS!"

I just laughed and laughed and laughed, so hard that I thought I was going to pee a little. A 40 year old man who has quickly melted down into a six year old boy.

I told him NO.

 

[tw1nsmom]

Thank you, that made me giggle.

 

[luvwinnie]

TOOOOOOOO funny! I think you need to set up a hidden camera.

 

[Virgo10]

What great pictures you draw in my mind. Rick, if you've kept them, you ought to re-post the "Walking in my underwear" and "Always Eat Before a Party" stories. That would be an awesome Christmas present to the board.

 

[Mermaid02]

Did you tell him he was on the naughty list now? They're all going back bucko!

 

[crazyforgoofy]

Tell Joe I know just how he feels. I like to sneak and peek myself.

The picture in my head is wonderful. Wish I could have seen it for real.

 

[ziggystardust]

gotta love what christmas can do to some people.

 

[Tiggeroo]

hehe, remember the woman who recently had her son arrested for opening christmas gifts early? You could threaten that.
My ds inherited an irish setter several years ago. My dh and I pulled up to her house on Christmas and we are looking at her picture window and the window over the door. Every few seconds we see her dog fly up into the air. We go in. Here is my ds sitting on the floor trying to wrap our gifts. But her dog is barking, jumping on the paper and leaping into the air. This dog is now probably 10yo and he hasn't slowed down at all.

 

[scarlett873]

That would be me...lol

 

[hiwaygal]

Rick, you SERIOUSLY need to publish these stories!! It would be a best seller!!

 

[Mrs.Toad]

 

[Mom2Ashli]

OH MY GOODNESS! Now that is some Funny stuff.

 

[RickinNYC]

TOOOOOOOO funny! I think you need to set up a hidden camera.

Now THAT is a great idea! Instead of a nanny cam, it'd be a JoeBill cam.

 

[TheOtherVillainess]

OMG Rick..you should become a standup comic and tell these stories. You'd have them rollin in the aisles.

TOV

 

[mrsmom]

That is funny Rick, I can just picture you and Joe and Bill , . I hope you guys have a great Christmas!
Kim

 

[MommyPoppins]

I leaned against the doorway and just watched the two buffoons, both of them clueless. Clearing my throat, Bill immediatley looked up from his perch on the largest of the boxes and bounded my way in greeting, his tongue lolling about, big rootbeer brown eyes sparkling, paws ready to smack into my... erm... parts.

I had to read that a few times. I forgot the Bill was the dog. I kept seeing a grown man.

 

[kejoda]

I should of known to be careful on this thread. Not sure if diapers or a seatbelt should be on the top of my list.

 

[pansmermaidzlagoon]

busted for sure!!! Thank you for that -cute story - I could picture it!!!

 

[flrose]

THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU..................That was waaaaaaaaaaaayy too funny! I really needed that.

 

[ChrizJen]

Great story, Rick!
My DP Jen and I have to be REALLY strategic this time of year. Not because either one of us is particularly "sneaky" per se. But mostly because if we're not careful, we'd BOTH have our gifts opened by December 1st!!!!

We're equally weak when it comes to keeping secrets...LOL
So what we've decided to do is hide our gifts off-site if you will. I have no idea where she is hiding mine, but she's made it perfectly clear that they're not in our apartment. And my gifts to her are staying right here in my office until Friday. So the plan is to keep them hidden, then on Christmas Eve (and not before) we will place them under the tree and in stockings. Out of sight, out of mind...right?
You're right. It's pathetic when two grown-ups are reduced to children. But it sure is fun, though isn't it?