Jessi and Aaron- December 18, 2010 At Home Wedding followed by Disneymoon

[Eeyores Butterfly]

Intro: Since Aaron and I have set a tentative date for our wedding and are beginning the planning process, I have decided to start a PJ. I really value everyone's advice. But as you can see, in many ways do not do things in the traditional order!

Background:

Groom: Aaron, soon to be 25. Aaron is currently a substitute teacher. He will be getting his Master's in Social Studies education this summer (he is already certified to teach). He is also waiting on a Special Ed certification and a CCNA (some kind of computer networking certification). Aaron also works as a rides supervisor at Worlds of Fun, a theme park owned by the Cedar Fair Company.

Bride: Jessi, 25. I am a K-5 special education teacher. I used to work at Disney, first in Fantasyland Attractions, and then Entertainment. As part of Entertainment, I got to perform in a lot of weddings and they have always had a special place in my heart. I also work at Worlds of Fun and am currently the lead at Viking Voyager (a log flume ride).

Meeting: Aaron and I met when we were taking graduate classes at Truman State University. I was a graduate student and he was in his senior year. We had two education classes together. Somehow, we discovered that we had both worked at theme parks and began trading stories. He used to walk me to my car after every class, even though it was in the opposite direction of his dorm. We would sometimes stand outside my car for an hour or more just talking. When he got his BA, he transferred to a school in KC. I have this rule that the guy must do the asking, but he was very shy and I knew he never would. So I finally took the plunge and asked him out on Facebook. I'm glad I did! We've been dating for 2.5 years now.

Engagement Story: Aaron and I had an evening planned for May 27, but he would not tell me where we were going. I kind of had an idea by the way he was trying to be sneakier than normal that something was up. Originally we were going to go to a place called Powell Gardens, but unfrotunately I had an appointment after school and we wouldn't be able to be there on time. We went to a park that was really pretty and walked and around and chatted. I thought I spied a suspicious looking box in his pocket, but bit my tongue. I love butterflies (obviously) and there was a butterfly garden in the park. He was originally going to do it there until we noticed the names of all the dead children and realized it was a children's memorial butterfly garden (still very pretty).

We went out to dinner at a new restaurant and he acted weird about the fact that I was paying even though it was my turn. After dinner we went to his apartment. He was going to do it inside his apartment, but then he saw his roommate's car and realized his roommate was home. He didn't want to do it with his roommate right there, not that there is anything wrong with that, but he wanted it to be private. So as I am getting ready to step out of the car he says he has something serious he wants to ask me and pulled out the ring. I love it! It was very nerdy- but that is 100% us. (Last week our date night was a trip to the National Archives in Kansas City for an exhibit).

The ring is very special. The diamond belonged to my mother. My father felt bad that her engagement ring was small as they were both college students at the time and bought her a 3/4 ct. round cut diamond solitaire necklace. Unfortunately she has developed an allergy to all metals and she didn't like the fact that it was sitting in a safe deposit box. She gave it to us. The setting is a handcrafted one we chose together. It is a wider band with some filligree work. I love that there is a cross on either side as our faith is very important to us. Until now, I have worn a purity ring given to me by my father when I was 13. Although you can't tell what it is by looking (and I don't say anything unless somebody asks me), it has always been a symbol of my faith. I like having the crosses on either side to remind me of that faith. This is something important to both of us, so I like having a reminder of that in something that is so special. Once I can figure out how to take a decent looking pic I will post it.

Why Disney? Aaron suggested doing Disney for our honeymoon. He knows I want to go back there so much, it was my home for almost three years. We are planning on doing a land/sea honeymoon because he would really like to take a cruise.


Wedding Plans:Well, we sat down with Aaron's parents tonight. They are so nice, I absolutely love them! They were very open to whatever, but most of their family would not be able to make a Florida wedding. We also have decided on a December wedding to accommodate our theme park and teaching schedules, and it simply will not be enough time to plan a Florida wedding. We were already talking about going to Disney around Christmas, so it will work out. I will try to incorporate some Disney touches into the wedding, so there will still be that. The other issue is that it would just be too much money. His side of the family is huge and we are looking at 140 guests on his side alone! We wouldn't be able to have the kind of reception we want at the Disney prices.

 

[Eeyores Butterfly]

Ceremony locations: This will determine pretty much everything else that we do. We are looking at several different ceremony locations, both in the KC area and in Florida. My obvious preference is Florida, but as I said in the OP, we want to make sure that what we do is economically sound and works for both families. My family is literally spread out from coast to coast, so no matter what I do my family will have to fly. His family is mostly located in Nebraska, so a KC wedding would be more convenient. We don't want to cause undo hardships, so that could be our biggest obstacle to any wedding.

By pricing venues and vendors now, I'm hoping to get an idea of just how much more expensive it would be to get married at Disney vs. Kansas City.

Option 1: My church in Blue Springs. Pros: This would certainly be the "easiest" option planning wise. It's $240 for the sanctuary, plus the officiant fee and of course the stipends for musicians and altar servers. I'm a cantor (singer) so I am familiar with the musicians there. I wouldn't have to worry about decorations as we would use the liturgical decorations. Cons: There are a lot of restrictions. We can only use parish musicians and a preapproved list of hymns. I am fairly new to the church so I don't have any strong emotional connection to it at this point. I am the only Catholic in either family, so it would not be a full mass, and I'm not sure how comfortable either family would be.

Option 2: Aaron's church in Lee's Summit. Pros: Aaron's family is very active there and his father is the president of the congregation. Cons: I don't have a lot of info yet. I am not Lutheran, so we would face the same ceremony issue that we would have at my church. I don't think anyone in my family is Lutheran, although his whole family is. I also cannot stand the main pastor. He's a nice man, but he reminds me too much of a Baptist Preacher. I used to be Baptist, and suffered some spiritual abuse at the hands of the preacher at my church in college when I made the decision to convert. His style of preaching brings back all those bad memories, so I would want to use the younger pastor. We would have to get a dispensation of form from the bishop to have a non Catholic ceremony.

Option 3: A Disney wedding using an onsite venue such as the WP. Pros: Disney would be a one stop shop, they would take care of everything which is very nice. There is also a deep emotional connection there. Cons: Once again, I would have to get a dispensation from form. The cost per venue is the most expensive with WP being $3,000, and other locations being $2,000. I also worry about asking our guests to spend the time and money to go to Orlando for a wedding.

Option 4: A Disney wedding, but using my church in Orlando, Holy Family, for the ceremony itself. Pros: It would still be a Disney wedding and I would still have all the ease and convenience of planning through them. The site itself is only $600. This church is special to me. It is where I converted in 2004. I also cantored there after I converted. The priest who confirmed me is still there, and the music director is the same as well. It is a beautiful church, I love the stained glass windows. We would not need to get a dispensation to have the ceremony there. It would also free up a significant amount of our minimum to be used towards the reception, which is nice since Aaron's family is huge! Cons: Same desitination issues as above. I imagine transportation, although provided by Disney, will be a little more complicated. I would have to get my priest to write a letter to Fr. Ennis stating that they are taking care of the required marriage prep.

Unfortunately, I do not have pics of the churches at the moment. I will try to add them as I locate them.

 

[girli565]

It sounds like you have a lot of things to decide on but it's nice to find somewhere to put them down and see what you have so far


Good luck with your planning!

 

[Eeyores Butterfly]

Thanks! I'm hoping that people here can tell me about their planning experiences. I've heard some people say that Disney ended up being just as much or even cheaper than an at home wedding. So having the chance to get input from those who have been in my shoes will help a lot!

 

[girli565]

Thanks! I'm hoping that people here can tell me about their planning experiences. I've heard some people say that Disney ended up being just as much or even cheaper than an at home wedding. So having the chance to get input from those who have been in my shoes will help a lot!

My experience is that a DTFW is way cheaper than having an at home wedding. If I was to have a wedding in Miami I would be spending at least $25-30k because we'd be inviting at least 100+ people and it would be at the Biltmore Hotel and not a banquet hall. Waaaaay more money than we're spending at WDW. And the $10k minimum for weekday 10am or 12pm ceremonies has been a wonderful way to stay on budget.

 

[*Pixiedust1438*]

Congratulations on starting the planning process! I think all of your choices sound like they would be great and all have special meaning to you. Good luck deciding! I'm excited to follow with your plans since our dates will be so close!

P.S. I am going to school to be a teacher as well! It stinks everywhere is cutting jobs right now.

 

[Eeyores Butterfly]

Congratulations on starting the planning process! Me and DF are penciled in for the same week you are looking at, at the WP. I think all of your choices sound like they would be great and all have special meaning to you. Good luck deciding! I'm excited to follow with your plans since our dates will be so close!

P.S. I am going to school to be a teacher as well! It stinks everywhere is cutting jobs right now.

Thanks! I'm really really hoping for the Florida option, but at least I know that if we can't get married there we will have our Disneymoon. If we have it here, I am going to talk to Worlds of Fun about the possibility of having our reception at an in park venue. The supervisors are a very close lot, and as I am dating Aaron, I do a lot with them!

If we do it at Disney, I think it would be awesome to have the reception in the RnR courtyard as we both work on/love coasters, but I can't find anybody who has had theirs there.

Good luck on teaching! It varies a lot by state. I keep hearing Pennslyvania as a state with a lot of openings, where California is laying off a ton. I know in our state, the governor just decided not to pay schools $650,000 they were owed in the month of March. There was absolutely no warning either.

 

[Eeyores Butterfly]

My mom and I went looking at dresses yesterday. I'm very short (4'10"), so we know that any dress will have to be a special order. On top of that, it is going to still require a lot of alterations and June is a busy season. I talked to David's Bridal and it looks like we will need to order probably no later than October in order to have plenty of time. We have started looking so that we can see how much they cost, and keep our eyes out for specific dresses to go on sale. I am trying to lose weight, so I don't want to buy it too early and then find out that there's simply too much to take in.

Here are the main contenders so far (in no particular order):

In the first pic, my mom is holding a ribbon over the trim so we can see what it would look like in the purple color I would probably use. The laces would be in the same color. I tried it on just to see what a pick up skirt would look like, it didn't look as horrid as I thought. I do love the back, it reminds me of a Renaissance dress.

This one is currently my favorite. I was surprised at how nice it looked. The problems with this dress is they have discontinued it so you can only get it from other stores (not special order) and it doesn't come in petite. Sadly, they don't have any that are in a similar style.

My parents really like this one. I'm still not sure about it.

I like this one for the unusual cut of the neck/straps and the coverage it provides. My parents said it makes me look taller, but standing next to Aaron (who is 6'4") I think that illusion will be minimal. I do like the sash, I think it dresses up nicely, but it would not be in black!

I really love this one. We would add sleeves to any strapless if I get married in a church as my church at least does not allow strapless gowns. I was surprised how good some of these looked, but I think they did look better in real life than in pictures. Unfortunately neither my mother nor I are good at fashion adn I want to make sure what I pick is flattering. I don't want to look back at the pics and think, "why didn't somebody tell me that looked so horrible one me?"

 

[Sarah <3 Disney]

These two are my favorites from the bunch. The ones with the pick ups and extra gathering just seem a bit overwhelming for your small frame, in my opinion. And I think the sleeves on the last one are a cute touch! You look lovely!

 

[Eeyores Butterfly]

Thanks! I took my mom with me, and she kept saying, "You know I'm no good at this!" I knew I could count on you all to be honest.

 

[girli565]

I love the second one on you with the purple sash. It's really lovely on you!

 

[Boston Disney Bride]

I also agree that the purple sash dress looks beautiful on you. I think that it falls perfectly on your body and flatters your petite frame. Hope that helps

 

[Brit_Jude]

I agree that these two look good on you. I really like how the second one fits you at the top and defines your waist, it makes you look like a princess. The first one does suit your frame and gives you the option of the color.

Have you thought of a little jacket to wear in the church that can be removed after the ceremony?

 

[*Pixiedust1438*]

LOVE this one on you.

 

[Eeyores Butterfly]

Yeah, I'm either going to do a jacket or attached sleeves. A lot of it will depend on the dress I pick and what all they have. They had a sheer jacket that looked really pretty, but I didn't really have a chance to try it on.

 

[Eeyores Butterfly]

Now that I've got venues priced, my next thing I'm going to look at is reception sites. I think this will be one of the biggest budget factors and help us determine the feasibility of Disney vs. at home. One issue with this is that I simply don't know the KC area that well.

That said, here are the options I am looking at:

Option 1: Worlds of Fun. They have a picnic pavilion, but it is outdoors with a roof and I worry about heat/weather. I also want to ask them about the possibility of an indoor location. This would be nice because so many of our mutual friends are are WoF coworkers and this would allow them to stop by. I'm not sure I would want them to do the catering though. If they do, it will start at $9.00/person, but that is probably BBQ or fried chicken buffet. I also don't know about entertainment.

Option 2: A hotel somewhere in the KC area. There are a couple of nice ones at Crown Center Plaza, including one with a rotating restaurant.

Option 3: Rock 'n' Rollercoaster Courtyard. As I mentioned before, with our theme park connections, this would be a neat and meaningful place.

Option 4: Contemporary. Aaron has told me that he would like to stay at the Contemporary. It's not my cup of tea (it always looks dirty and out of date to me) but their venues look really neat and I think he would really enjoy it. Garden Grill would be cool, but I doubt that would be within our budget.

Option 5: World Showcase. I do like the idea of having something in the World Showcase. Particularly along the time of Illuminations. The one thing that worries me is that it seems like the majority of locations are outdoors. I have dealt with Florida weather enough that I'm not sure I like the idea of an outdoor venue. I remember doing a wedding at Sunrise Point at the Poly and we had to move inside because wind was blowing dirt around and it was screwing up the pictures and getting on the cake. There are some very pretty venues though, so it is defintely something to take into consideration.

Like I said, I think the reception is probably going to be the biggest determining factor. I am calling DFTW this week to find out how it would work budget wise if we had our wedding at Holy Family. My guess is that it would free up a couple of thousand from our minimum for the reception since we would not be spending that on the ceremony (although I'm not sure about the added transportation cost) which would be good. Aaron's family is huge. He has more people on one side than I have on both sides of my family combined. So that is where the majority of hte cost is going to come in.

 

[Eeyores Butterfly]

I talked to Disney today and got some great information for planning as a Catholic bride. Here is what they told me:

They rent their transportation through Mears if you use a bus, and since it is a per hour fee, to her knowledge there would be no extra charge. Basically, I would still meet the minimum, but the bulk would go to the reception. (I would use their floral, but musician, officiant, etc. would be from the church.) Because I am still meeting the minimums, I would still get access to the bridal salon and everything else.

 

[beach bride 2010]

I also really like dress #2 and the last one on you. If it helps any I am also petite and when I was dress shopping I was told by more than one salon to stay away from pick-ups and ballgown styles because they swallow petite brides up. I tried a few on and in my case that statement was true. I ended up having the dress I chose custom made (not from David's but similar in price to the ones I tried on there). It was well worth the extra $250 it cost and it didn't need too many alterations since it was custom made so you do save some money in that area. I ordered in late Oct and it was ready early Feb but I'd definitely recommend allowing more time if you can. The nice thing about having a dress custom made too is that you could probably request that they add a purple sash if that's what you want.
As far as where to have the wedding, it sounds like your budget is set. The next thing you should probably really think about is your guest list. Is it more important to you that everyone you want be at your wedding or is location more important and will you be okay with the reality that a lot of people won't be able to make the trip for various reasons? A Disney wedding is cheaper than an at home wedding for many brides mainly because it completely changes their guest list and cuts a lot of people that would've been at their wedding had they been married locally out. Guests really are one of your biggest wedding expenses-you have to pay for everything from their invite to their favor to their food and drinks so the more guests you have, the more $ your wedding will be.
It looks like you are considering a Wishes wedding vs an escape. If you have it off property at the church figure it'll cost you at least $500 for transportation, at least $2000 for photography if you use RnR Coaster courtyard since you have to use Disney and $1200 for Mickey and Minnie's 30 min set. You haven't added in any floral, decor, reception site rental fee, or food yet and you are already at $3700 at the very minimum. Looking at it that way, an at home ceremony and reception would probably be cheaper.
If it is your dream to get married at Disney though, don't give up on it! You still have plenty of time to save up. Have you considered possibly doing a weekday escape wedding at WDW followed by an at home church blessing and reception? Good luck!

 

[Eeyores Butterfly]

Thanks! I have to admit, I am very impressed with DFTW. I called yesterday with some questions and found out that my email request hadn't gone through. Not only did I receive and e-mail from Pam Pearce yesterday, I received a phone call today from Michelle Gahooly (sp?). I wasn't available so she left me a message. They are definitely on the ball!

 

[princess22]

Congrats!!! I just wanted to stop in and say hi! The dress that you liked that doesn't come in petites was my dress!!! It's a great dress!

How long ago did you work in Fantasyland?