Isn't anyone else's spouse a jerk sometimes?

[disykat]

Mine is. I knew it when I married him. He would probably say the same thing about me. We disagree on lots of stuff and debate/compromise pretty regularly. We love each other despite thinking each other are misguided.

I was reading on the "little people big world" thread and people are speculating they're headed for divorce because they argue and Matt's pretty jerky at times. This may or may not be, but it got me to wondering, because it seems like I see this so often on the DIS - the idea that if you're happy you don't argue and don't think each other are giant jerks sometimes.

Is anyone else willing to admit they married a "jerk" and are actually happy?

 

[AKL_Megs]

I wouldn't say my DH is a jerk per se, but he sure has his "jerky" moments.

If something doesn't go his way (like me asking him to help with the dishes while he is busy watching baseball, for instance... ) he can be a downright JERK!

But then again, I'm no walk in the park some days...

 

[Bren's Mom]

I'll admit it! I'm happily married, our 5 year anniversary is next month. And, yes, sometimes my dh is a jerk, and yes, I knew this before I married him! We dated for 4 years before getting married, and lived together, so I knew him well. Sometimes I just want to kick him! But...I wouldn't trade him. Not for anything.

(ETA: Ha AKL, we used the same smiley! LOL And I wanted to add that to me jerk does NOT equal verbally or physically abusive...jerk, to me, is obnoxious or oblivious...but certainly not abusive...my dh would never, ever be mean, even when he IS being a jerk.)

 

[walkerag]

I think it's only natural to disagree with your spouse. You're not going to see eye to eye on everything and yes when my husband doesn't see things my way he is most certainly being a jerk

I had an ex boyfriend that I dated for 4 years and we never argued about anything. Looking back though, it wasn't because I didn't disagree with some things he did or said, it was because I was too spineless in my teenage years and early 20's to say anything to him. NOT ANYMORE!!!

 

[LiLIrishChick63]

yes DH can be a jerk at times, i knew it before i married him.

my BIGGEST pet peeve i have of him is if someone says something kind of rude or condecending to me, he doesn't stick up for me. he CONSTANTLY will say "what?? i didn't hear anything!" to try and get around the situation.

but he's always been like that, and i've known that. i'm usually the one with the bigger mouth so in a way it works out. because if someone says something nasty to me, and he doesn't say anything to them about it, i'm the one going off to them about it lol.

 

[LaurenLC]

I wouldn't call my husband a jerk, but he has jerky moments. I do have to admit that they are pretty few and far between though... I think we all can act a little jerky at times, myself included.

 

[starann]

Hi, my name is Star and my husband is a JERK but I love him!!!!

DH is a very 'strong character' He doesn't care what other people think or feel and usually thinks he is right most of the time. He has a temper. He is a jerk.

However, he can be sweet as pie and give someone the shirt off his back. He is a good father and husband.

A LOT of people find him abrasive, but hey I have girlfriends who's husband to things I could not put up with, so to each their own!

 

[Acklander]

Sure, DH can be a jerk sometimes, but not that often. I'd say we probably argue about once a month, if that. It drives me crazy when he says something like - That shouldn't bother you or That didn't hurt. I HATE it when he tells me how I should feel, and that will usually cause me to blow up, but other than that, it's pretty quiet here. Some people are more comfortable around conflict than others. If we were arguing all the time or on a daily basis, I'd probably bail - as I wouldn't enjoy being at home.
I don't watch the little people/big world show so don't know how often they argue on there, BUT I'd keep in mind that it's a TV show. If they showed them getting along every moment it would probably be very boring, so they just cut and paste the juciest parts.

 

[MnMomtoboys]

Everyone can be jerk sometimes, even ourselves and our kids. Its how they are the other times that matter.

 

[LiLIrishChick63]

Everyone can be jerk sometimes, even ourselves and our kids. Its how they are the other times that matter.

exactly. i have my jerky moments too(it's usually a day or two every month lol ) but the rest of the time i'm pretty nice.

 

[phillmolly]

Star - My DH sounds just like yours, LOL!

DH can defintely be a jerk at times, but for the most part I love him and his jerky parts!

 

[golfgal]

Yes, my husband can be a jerk at times. Some of the 'jerkier' moments come when he thinks I should treat him like his mom did and do everything for him . He also doesn't like to be asked to do things, like just now I asked him to print off our address list so we can start addressing DS17's Grad Party Invites and he cops this attitude. He is playing solitaire on the computer that has the list on it, it isn't like it is a big deal to open the address book and select "print".

 

[busyshrew]

I've often said that my DH has an "[edit]streak" in him.... I've also often described him as being more stubborn than a mule - once he digs his heels in it doesn't matter how much yelling, shouting and bit-dragging I do, he'll just pin his ears and pull back harder.... (and yes, I've said these things TO my husband before I've said them to anyone else!).

It doesn't matter though. He's a wonderful, wonderful man. And I am certainly NOT PERFECT.

I like that line from Glee, "I'm a good man... I'll treat you right. I'll put up with all your crazy".

Yup, that's about right... in my husband, I finally found the man that was happy to put up with all my crazy!

 

[sbell111]

I didn't marry a jerk, but my wife did.

 

[daisax]

Life's too short to live with a jerk. Sure, people can get stressed, but if stress makes somebody nasty -- you're better off alone.

 

[rparmfamily]

Mine definately has "jerky" moments.

 

[krcit]

I don't think I would believe anyone who said their spouse(or themselves) was never a jerk

 

[Pakey]

I've been happily married for 25 years and I only recall one jerky incident of my husband's. He's extremely easy going and this one jerky time was so out of character that I remember it clearly.

I, on the other hand, move from one jerky moment to the next.

 

[VillageMama]

I don't think I would believe anyone who said their spouse(or themselves) was never a jerk

Well, you should believe me because it's true... my husband just isn't a jerk. I knew that before I married him, too.

Now me, on the other hand... my emotions can be all over the place and sometimes I don't handle them as well as I should. Thank goodness hubby is much more even tempered than I am!

LOL... I just saw Pakey's post! We must have married similar men. And they married similar women!

 

[nmmom95]

My husband is not so much a jerk, but he's really uptight, so he can be a giant PITA at times. I, however, am a ray of sunshine!