Is your Olive Garden like this?(Clarified in Post #30)

bananiem said:
Here's my point: It was RUDE of the hostess to interrupt our conversation for her CANNED, SCRIPTED crap. It is NOT "nice service" when the wait person tells us he'll be "delighted to seat us" EVERY STINKIN' TIME WE'RE THERE! It's a script and it needs to be changed once in awhile! Same with the "nice suit and tie" crap. He obviously says it to EVERY MAN that comes in.
Their food isn't that good. I'd rather go to a restaurant that let's the staff
talk for themselves and don't interrupt my dh and my conversation.


Holy Moly. Surely you jest. :scared1: :scared1: :scared1:
 
LadyBears said:
"Miss" - fine, "guys" when in a group setting - fine, "dear" - fine, "Lady" - fine. But "ma'am" is just rude & disrespectful! Ma'am is just as bad as witch with a b or any other curse word. It is a rude term!! Why would I want to be seated or served by someone who is going to disrespect me? That IS offensive!

:confused3 You're kidding me...my mama always said yankees were a little strange about Ma'am, but I never believed her. I guess mama knew what she was talking about.
 
ilovepcot said:
Okay, I'll admit some of the endearments service people use aren't ones I'd choose, BUT...I look at them and realize that some of them "probably" haven't attended Miss Porter's Finishing School and been taught how to "properly" address their patrons. Or, it "could be" they were absent due to illness the day that was addressed. Or, it "could be" some of these people in the service industry aren't high school graduates. And it "could be" they're having a struggle working more than one job and trying to raise a family, don't get enough sleep, have tired backs and sore feet. It "could be" they're doing the best they can with what they've got. Others may not agree, but I think we should cut them some slack!

Very well said...I totally agree ::yes::
 
Tigger&Belle said:
Well, when I'm double the servers age, Miss seems a little silly. I'm ok with Ma'am in that case. But I wouldn't say anything to the waiter about being called Miss and actually get a chuckle out of it. And maybe someone doesn't mind endearments from strangers. That never really bothered me as long as it's not done in a patronizing way.

Guys is something that on the west coast we always said to a group, kind of like other people would say, "ya'll".

When I was younger, I waited tables and approached a table of older women one night saying, "how are you ladies doing over here, can I get you anything?" One of them thanked me for not calling them guys! LOL I did use guys, but only on the younger people. It was always ladies if it was a table of women, guys if it was men or young people, or folks if it was mixed. Perhaps someone took offense, but I was never fake (or I don't think I was. I was always sincere with my guests even if it didn't always show. I wanted to know if they had any little complaint at all or if they needed anything).

I guess if people are so bothered with the wait staff trying to make small talk, perhaps they really should seek alternative places to eat? I think the mainstream wants exactly what they get. You can't please all the people all the time though! I do understand how irritating it might be if the person that seats you keeps saying repetitive things and perhaps he should get a new routine, but.....If that would get you so bent out of shape that you couldn't enjoy your dinner, well.......

I just can't see that ever having any affect on where I chose to eat.
 

I'm in Maryland and I expect, and prefer, Ma'am, too. It is respectful. "Miss" is respectful if used for a young girl. My opinion.
 
LadyBears said:
"Miss" - fine, "guys" when in a group setting - fine, "dear" - fine, "Lady" - fine. But "ma'am" is just rude & disrespectful! Ma'am is just as bad as witch with a b or any other curse word. It is a rude term!! Why would I want to be seated or served by someone who is going to disrespect me? That IS offensive!


WHAT?! Ma'am is considered a cuss word? I guess I'm out of the loop. I've lived in the south a long time and ma'am is a term of repect. You know, "yes, ma'am", no different than 'sir'.

Why don't you just ignore the service people in the restaurant and not make eye contact unless you want something from them, if I bothers you to have them talk to you? That would probably get the message across.
 
LoveWDW said:
I'm in Maryland and I expect, and prefer, Ma'am, too. It is respectful. "Miss" is respectful if used for a young girl. My opinion.

That's just it, everyone likes something else. The wait staff are not mind readers, so they don't know in advance what you like and dislike. One thing I think we can all conclude though, the wait staff is working for tips only (for the most part) and they would never purposely do anything to PO any of their guests. Not if they'd like to keep their bills up anyway.
 
LadyBears said:
"Miss" - fine, "guys" when in a group setting - fine, "dear" - fine, "Lady" - fine. But "ma'am" is just rude & disrespectful! Ma'am is just as bad as witch with a b or any other curse word. It is a rude term!! Why would I want to be seated or served by someone who is going to disrespect me? That IS offensive!

Why is Ma'am offensive? Isn't it an abreviation for madame?
I understand it makes some people feel old -but it is not technically impolite.
 
I would get in serious Doo Doo if I did NOT say Ma'am growing up. I still do if I don't say it.

Everyone should realize that some of us are raised into using this term as a manner of being polite and respectful.
 
minkydog said:
:confused3 You're kidding me...my mama always said yankees were a little strange about Ma'am, but I never believed her. I guess mama knew what she was talking about.
This "Yankee" doesn't want to be called Ma'am yet(I'm 34) but I have never heard of anyone thinking it's rude, just a sign of being older.
I worked in a bank and called older customers ma'am allll the time and never heard a person complain about it, so I don't get the whole "Yankees are a little strange about ma'am" thing.

As for guys--I always call a group of people, male, female or mixed, "guys".
If someone doesn't like it, tough noogies.
 
minkydog said:
:confused3 You're kidding me...my mama always said yankees were a little strange about Ma'am, but I never believed her. I guess mama knew what she was talking about.

Well, as a total Yankee I must say that the year that I taught in Macon, Georgia saw me "ma-amed" more than the rest of my 40plus years together!

I always thought it was rather formal and polite. Showed good manners.
 
I use the term "maam" to my customers, no matter what their age.It's a polite Southern thing, I guess.

But I don't like "Chain "Italian Restaurants. I prefer to find a family run place because the food is more authentic.
 
Well...

I have never been a fan of Olive Garden here. We've only been there a couple times since they opened. Food was only ok, and prices kind of high.

Do you like MacGrill at the Mall? We went once, and it was so loud in there, it pretty much eliminated any table conversation!

herc.
 
Nope, I can say that your situation has never happened at the Olive Garden here. :confused3
 
kidshop said:
WHAT?! Ma'am is considered a cuss word? I guess I'm out of the loop. I've lived in the south a long time and ma'am is a term of repect. You know, "yes, ma'am", no different than 'sir'.

Why don't you just ignore the service people in the restaurant and not make eye contact unless you want something from them, if I bothers you to have them talk to you? That would probably get the message across.

I guess it is a Northern vs Southern thing. Here it is insulting. If you say "ma'am" up here - the common response is "I am NOT a ma'am!".

It doesn't bother me to talk to or to be talked to by "service people" - I worked as a waitress for many years!

clarabelle said:
Why is Ma'am offensive? Isn't it an abreviation for madame?
I understand it makes some people feel old -but it is not technically impolite.

Isn't a Madame the person who runs a brothel?? Maybe if I was receiving the money they make I might think different, but being called a prostitute is not a compliment.
 
LadyBears said:
I guess it is a Northern vs Southern thing. Here it is insulting. If you say "ma'am" up here - the common response is "I am NOT a ma'am!".

Isn't a Madame the person who runs a brothel?? Maybe if I was receiving the money they make I might think different, but being called a prostitute is not a compliment.

I've lived in the north all my 39 years and have never come across this sentiment before - it's very surprising to me, and I don't think all northerners feel this way. Although it makes me feel old when a young whippersnapper calls me "ma'am," it is widely recognized as a sign of respect.
 
LadyBears said:
I guess it is a Northern vs Southern thing. Here it is insulting. If you say "ma'am" up here - the common response is "I am NOT a ma'am!".

It doesn't bother me to talk to or to be talked to by "service people" - I worked as a waitress for many years!



Isn't a Madame the person who runs a brothel?? Maybe if I was receiving the money they make I might think different, but being called a prostitute is not a compliment.

No one is calling you a prostitute when they call you ma'am. Honestly, you'd better stay out of the south if you don't want to be referred to in that manner several times a day.
 
Keli said:
No one is calling you a prostitute when they call you ma'am. Honestly, you'd better stay out of the south if you don't want to be referred to in that manner several times a day.


::yes::
 
Kids can get in big trouble if they don't say ma'am in Texas. I can't believe that anyone thinks it's insulting.

As for Madame, it's not JUST a term for someone that runs a house of ill repute. It's also considered a polite term. In older society, ladies were always referred to as Madame " ". It's left over from that time.

As for the other terms, I don't mind being called Miss, Madame, ma'am, guys or whatever. As long as the person is friendly, they can call me whatever. To me, this is a lot of fuss over some pretty insignificant stuff.
 
"madame" and "madam" -- not the same

anyone who believes they are being insulted by a waitperson calling them "ma'am" needs to re-educate themselves. Seems the less than minimum wage employee is more proper than they are. :rotfl2:
 


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