Is your house bigger than your friends houses?

[PhotobearSam]

We are a couple who bought a home 2 yrs ago from my Dad. It is the home I was born in and Dad repurchased it when I was in College and did a reno so it's like new. We changed all the flooring and painted but it has a new roof, new doors, new windows, etc.

He sold it to us for $65,000 but I could easily get $135,000 for it now. It's 2100 sq feet when we include the finished parts of the basement and it's just DH and I and 3 cats. It's 5 bedrooms (which we use as 1 guest room, my office, his computer room, our room and a craft room) and 2 baths (used to be a duplex) and we LOVE it even though it's not a Spa tub, super large rooms, vaulted ceilings etc,... I feel like Cinderella and this is my perfect shoe fit type of place. I feel AT HOME here.

Well, our friends all have HUGE houses and I can't even imagine what kind of debt they must have let alone trying to keep the houses clean.

I was wondering if we are the only ones that our friends houses dwarf our own.

Are you jealous of friends that have bigger, newer, more expensive homes?

We have some friends with a large NEW home and they always end up coming here because we really like to entertain and they really suck at it. It makes me feel like I accomplished our goal of having a HOME nit just a nice HOUSE.

 

[poohandwendy]

We have a small house, smaller than most of our friends homes. (4 BR 2 baths about 2000 sq feet)

I don't really think about how much debt my friends have, none of them seem to be having trouble with it.

No, I am not jealous, I love my own life. If I wanted a bigger house, I would buy one.

I don't think there is a better/worse with something like this. If you can afford your home and are happy with it, it's right for you.

 

[connorlevismom]

We are a couple who bought a home 2 yrs ago from my Dad. It is the home I was born in and Dad repurchased it when I was in College and did a reno so it's like new. We changed all the flooring and painted but it has a new roof, new doors, new windows, etc.

He sold it to us for $65,000 but I could easily get $135,000 for it now. It's 2100 sq feet when we include the finished parts of the basement and it's just DH and I and 3 cats. It's 5 bedrooms (which we use as 1 guest room, my office, his computer room, our room and a craft room) and 2 baths (used to be a duplex) and we LOVE it even though it's not a Spa tub, super large rooms, vaulted ceilings etc,... I feel like Cinderella and this is my perfect shoe fit type of place. I feel AT HOME here.

Well, our friends all have HUGE houses and I can't even imagine what kind of debt they must have let alone trying to keep the houses clean.
I was wondering if we are the only ones that our friends houses dwarf our own.

Are you jealous of friends that have bigger, newer, more expensive homes?

We have some friends with a large NEW home and they always end up coming here because we really like to entertain and they really suck at it. It makes me feel like I accomplished our goal of having a HOME nit just a nice HOUSE.

Why do you assume that your friends are in debt and their houses are filthy. And just because their house is big, does not mean it is not a home. Maybe they don't like to entertain and because you do, they all come to your house. Why should they HAVE to entertain just because they have a large house? Is is not a requirement when you purchase a home.

I am sorry if this comes off as rude, but I cannot believe you think they have dirty houses because theirs is bigger than yours.

Kristine

 

[mickeyboat]

We bought a 100 year old home which we intended to be a starter home. We renovated every square inch of it, and are still there 10 years later. It is the perfect size for us, and we plan to stay there at least until the kids get out of school.

I do miss a family room, though. We are hoping to build a garage in the next year or so, and put a big room above it where we can have a ping ping table and some other games, a couple of couches, a tv, a little fridge, etc. I figure it will be a good place where the kids can hang out with their friends.

I am also considering installing video monitoring - but that is another thread.

Denae

 

[Christine]

Some of my friends have smaller homes, some the same size (my best friend and I have the SAME house ) and some of my friends live in much larger homes. I never really thought about it at all I guess.

 

[Crankyshank]

I am sorry if this comes off as rude, but I cannot believe you think they have dirty houses because theirs is bigger than yours.

Kristine

I don't think she's saying that she believes their houses are filthy. What I got from the statement is that she knows how much work it goes into cleaning her small house, so she can't imagine how much work it is to clean a bigger one.

To answer the OP:
I have friends with bigger homes, and I have friends with the same size home as me (2BR/1BA, 1200 sq ft). I'm not jealous of my friends because they have a bigger house. I'm jealous of one couple because they have a gorgeous Victorian they put a lot of work into, and I'm jealous of my friends with the biggest house because they have a brand new gorgeous kitchen and a maid service. And some of them are jealous of me because of my good sized back yard.
There are pros and cons to a house, no matter the size. Sure, I'd love to have a bigger house, but right now our house is a good size for us. We're going to finish the basement in order to be able to entertain during the winter and to have some more room to move around.

 

[WDWAurora]

Surprisingly enough, ours is probably the largest of our friends, at 1700 sf with a 2 car garage. But...we're young, first of all, and a lot of our friends aren't married so they live with roomates in apartments or townhouses. The relatives that are our age have more debt than we do (we actually do know that, not just an assumption) so they purchased smaller homes so that they could work on paying off previous debt as well (so they made a smart financial decision-that I totally agree with).

We tried to buy as much house as we could afford, because we're hoping to have at least one child soon, my parents live out of town, etc, etc, etc. We have 4 bedrooms, so one for us, one for an office, one will be a second tv room/guest room, and one is basically in limbo for a nursery, although it does have a twin bed in it (my grandmothers can have that one if they come visit). Who knows, my dad could end up moving in with us someday, so I'm sure we'll need all this room someday (and for now we just love having it!)

Right when we were moving in, we found out DH's uncle was buying a 1.2 million dollar home with over 5000 sf and an unfinished basement and 3 car garage. Whoa baby! hehe So ours doesn't even rank compared to that, but I don't care. They aren't going into debt for it and the location is great for them, so I'm glad they found something that works for them.

 

[Buckalew11]

No my house is not bigger. My house about 2000 sq. feet and plenty big enough. We are talking about building a house in a few years and if we do, it will be about this same size (unless the building codes for the sub says it has to be bigger then it will be 2200. I would not want a McMansion and like you, I can't imagine keeping it clean.

I do not think PhotobearSam was saying that they can't keep them clean but I think she feels like me and feels like she can't imagine having to clean one so big, that's all.

There are alot of people around here having trouble with their mortgages. It was something you could see coming though.

 

[Fitswimmer]

Oh wow-no way! I'm single, with no kids. I own a one bedroom condo!!

Even if the lottery balls fell right, the largest house I could ever see myself owning would be 3 bedrooms. Of course, that's only if I lived in Orlando or at the beach where I would be guaranteed guests!

 

[PrincessPAC]

We live in one of the nicest neighborhoods in our area, and our house is pretty large (over 4000 sq. ft.). It was practically given to us by a friend of the family, so we lucked out.

After we moved, our closest friends stopped talking to us. When we did finally get ahold of them, they said "well, you're too good for us now". We never said or did anything to them to make them feel this way. Now, whenever we do run into them, they always have some comment about the house. (It's been 4 years! It's just a house!)

We now have new friends who don't care about the size of our house. They like us for who we are - not b/c of material possessions.

Please don't attack me. I'm not trying to sound snobby. I freely admit that I live in a house that I can't afford (had it not been given to me for next to nothing.)

 

[Lisa_M]

Our apartment is bigger than most of our friend's apartments. We (and they don't have homes), but we are 25 and most of my friends (and me too) have been in college for so long there is no money to buy a house. Also, I am the only one married, so maybe they have no need/want for a house yet. Actually, my best friend, her boyfriend, and their daughter live in a house that his parents own. It is slightly bigger than my apartment, but it's a dump. I'm not being rude, it's really, really bad and in a not so hot area too.

 

[mickeyboat]

Oh wow-no way! I'm single, with no kids. I own a one bedroom condo!!

Even if the lottery balls fell right, the largest house I could ever see myself owning would be 3 bedrooms. Of course, that's only if I lived in Orlando or at the beach where I would be guaranteed guests!

You had better upgrade. I have a hankering to visit New Jersey! There are 4 of us.

Denae

 

[Chloe'sMom]

I think my house is the smallest, but except for one friend our's is the "newest" our house is about 7 years old and 1350 sq feet with a finished basement that gives another 900 sq feet of living space. Most of my friends have 30+ year old homes that are 2000 sq feet on the main level.

They all seem to be doing good.

~Amanda

 

[Buckalew11]

We live in one of the nicest neighborhoods in our area, and our house is pretty large (over 4000 sq. ft.). It was practically given to us by a friend of the family, so we lucked out.

After we moved, our closest friends stopped talking to us. When we did finally get ahold of them, they said "well, you're too good for us now". We never said or did anything to them to make them feel this way. Now, whenever we do run into them, they always have some comment about the house. (It's been 4 years! It's just a house!)

We now have new friends who don't care about the size of our house. They like us for who we are - not b/c of material possessions.

Please don't attack me. I'm not trying to sound snobby. I freely admit that I live in a house that I can't afford (had it not been given to me for next to nothing.)

I don't think anyone should jump on you. It is a fact, you lost a friend who obviously wasn't a friend in the first place is what it sounds like to me. My DH's 3 best friends ar doctors. They have houses that we could all live in and still never see one another. They are still our friends because we like them. When they moved moved up and built these homes, we never felt like they were "too good" for us. Why do some people think that way??? That's a common feeling though, I saw it happen where I used to work between co-workers.

 

[sue1013]

Our house is small, very small compared to the large homes being built now in our area. Most of my friends and family have larger homes than me, I'm not jealous one bit. You need to live your life and make decisions that are right for you. We raised our kids here (DS still in college only here for the summers)and survived now that it's just DH and myself a bigger home is the last thing I want. Everyone has different priorities.

 

[mickeyfan2]

DH and I built the home we wanted. We put much sweat equity into our home and went without stuff done until we could afford it. We got a construction loan/mortgage to put up the basic house and only finish off part of it. We saved and paid cash for the rest. It is now complete and we love it.

All our friends homes seem to fit them just as well as ours fits us. We never discuss finances unless they bring up theirs and ask our opinion.

 

[ducklite]

Some of our friends have much larger homes, others have much smaller homes. We have one friend who is currently homeless. (Not on the street, but definitely with things in storage and living in a motel, so technically homeless. )

I'm not jealous of anyone of them. I love my home, it's just the right size, and I find it very comfortable. It has a spa tub, vaulted ceilings, and all sorts of other things, but we aren't swimming in debt as a result. This is our second home. our first home was smaller and we lived well below our means so that we could save to build this place and have some "upgrades."

I don't think that it's appropriate or even close to accurate to assume that anyone with a larger or nicer home must be drowning in debt. You never really know what someone's circumstances are.

I have a friend who lives in a really cute home, probably 2400 s/f. She works at Home Depot, makes maybe $10 an hour. She drives a brand new car. When she got divorced, she and her ex sold their home--which made them a tidy profit due to real estate market at the time. She put that money into investments and draws on the interest/dividends only. Her father is quite wealthy and bought the house she's living in for her. She only pays her utlities and the taxes. She saved her money and paid cash for the car. But she doens't go around telling everyone her life story, so I'm sure many think she must be in debt to ehr eyeballs. Far from it.

My home is about 2950 s/f under air. I don't know why anyone would think it was harder to keep that clean than a smaller home? I've got an extra hour of vacuuming, dusting, and mopping each month over my previous home which was a little more than half the size.

 

[Darcy03231]

My house is about 1,000 square feet larger than all my friends (we have about 3200 sq). Having said that, my family is also larger so we needed a larger home and trust me, its nothing fancy. When we bought it we had four children living at home and are blended family. We wanted each child to be able to keep having their own bedroom as that was what they were used to and we felt it was going to be hard enough to blend a family without making them give up the privacy they were used to. We still didn't buy as much house as we were "approved" for. We decided how much we were comfortable spending and bought a house for that amount that fit our needs. And, I'll admit, it is a PIA to clean. As soon as the oldest is out of high school we plan to sell and buy something smaller. By that time the children will be: 29, 25, 21 & 19 and, hopefully, we won't need as much house.

 

[connorlevismom]

Our house is small, very small compared to the large homes being built now in our area. Most of my friends and family have larger homes than me, I'm not jealous one bit. You need to live your life and make decisions that are right for you. We raised our kids here (DS still in college only here for the summers)and survived now that it's just DH and myself a bigger home is the last thing I want. Everyone has different priorities.

I agree 100%. People should just do what works for them and not worry about anyone else.

My niece always makes comments that we live in a bigger house than she does and she does not have to have a big house to feel good about herself. Yet, she has 4 4-wheelers, a boat, and 4 snowmobiles. I have absolutely none of those items. So, it is all about priorities. I spend my money on my house because I am a homebody and wanted a bigger house. She brought all those toys because that is what they enjoy doing.

Kristine

 

[darlak]

We sold a 5 bedroom/3 bath home to move to a 3 bedroom/1 bath house. We also went from having 4 kids at home to only having one and this house is waterfront and in a better school system. The oldest room in my house was built in the '20's and after that, each room was added at a different time. It's a work in progress, but we love it. Your priorities change over time. I expect this to be my last house and it's perfect for us now.

I am so far past worrying about those kinds of things. I hope all my friends love their houses as much as I love mine and I hope they can afford them, but it's just not something I ever think about.

(I did have to add a second bath right away!)