Is there a reason?

[connorlevismom]

Maybe I am just in a touchy mood today but this is on my nerves. Why is it that people feel the need to interject their personal beliefs into threads that have nothing to do with them?

What I mean is, why do SAHM's go into threads about daycare and spout that kids should be at home with their moms? Why do working parents go into threads for SAHM's and say that working is better or harder? Why do breastfeeding moms go into threads about bottle feeding and feel the need to tell them how they should be breastfeeding? Why do bottle feeders feel the need to tell breast feeding moms they should cover up?

I think you get the idea here, right? What is the purpose of this? Is it that you just feel the need to tell everyone that YOUR way is best? What makes you want to go into a thread that has nothing to do with you and spout off YOUR beliefs? I just don't get it. Why not just let people live their own lives?

OK, rant over.

Kristine

 

[Alesia]

They're just looking for validation.

-or-

It makes them feel superior.

 

[RMulieri]

Not to sound mean, but that is the way it is.There are always (everywhere and I mean everywhere) that people will give their opinions, whether you want it or not.The old SAHM vs WM, and Breast VS Bottle ,Homeschool,VS Public school debates are constant,constant,constant. I think people take things as a personal assault against them and their parenting styles and choices.I quite honestly don't let it faze me, and I don't even listen to it anymore, it isn't going to change or go anywhere.

 

[ajh88]

I have a theory about that - I think that whoever is on the "opposing" side thinks if they state their arguments clearly/cleverly/whatever that maybe they can convince people to change to see things their way.

I know this is a futile approach, but it's the only thing I can come up with. Unless of course the original person ASKED for opinions or points of view.

Anytime I see things like that, a tiny part of me wants to go to a board where I don't "belong" (the teen board for example) and stir up trouble. I don't have it in me though...I'm timid, even online.

 

[jellybeans0607]

Because they can

 

[Willow25]

I think that the working mom vs SAHM debate gets so heated because working mom's feel their own guilt and SAHM don't feel validated in their "work". Really it is each sides way of combating those feelings. No different than the breastfeeding/bottle feeding.

I really think sometimes why can't we all be happy that in this day and age we have the option of making those choices.

But like someone else said in a public forum you have to expect to get people expressing their opinions.

 

[Stephres]

I think because they feel safe in the "anonymous" internet. They most likely would never talk to their neighbor or friend or relative that way if they disagreed with their parenting, but they feel safe to state their opinion as fact because they can't see the person they might be offending or upsetting.

I agree, it is very frustrating. Whenever I give my opinion, I always try to qualify as it worked for us, may work for you or not. My way is not necessarily the best way!

 

[Luv Bunnies]

I think because they feel safe in the "anonymous" internet. They most likely would never talk to their neighbor or friend or relative that way if they disagreed with their parenting, but they feel safe to state their opinion as fact because they can't see the person they might be offending or upsetting.

Exactly. People like the anonimity of the Internet. They'll type things that they would never dare say to someone's face.

 

[brockash]

Maybe I am just in a touchy mood today but this is on my nerves. Why is it that people feel the need to interject their personal beliefs into threads that have nothing to do with them?

What I mean is, why do SAHM's go into threads about daycare and spout that kids should be at home with their moms? Why do working parents go into threads for SAHM's and say that working is better or harder? Why do breastfeeding moms go into threads about bottle feeding and feel the need to tell them how they should be breastfeeding? Why do bottle feeders feel the need to tell breast feeding moms they should cover up?

I think you get the idea here, right? What is the purpose of this? Is it that you just feel the need to tell everyone that YOUR way is best? What makes you want to go into a thread that has nothing to do with you and spout off YOUR beliefs? I just don't get it. Why not just let people live their own lives?

OK, rant over.

Kristine

I couldn't agree more, and unfortunately my DH is one of them. He's not on these boards, but just with things life in general, boy is it annoying. My philosophy is, if you're not hurting anyone, then do things the way YOU personally think is best, and I nor anyone else should have an issue with it. It doesn't effect us and it's not hurting anyone.

 

[MommytoaSweetie]

I think it's a combination of all of it. It's a way of people expressing their teeny bit of guilt or lack of confidence in their own choice, trying to make it sound better... formula feeding moms may be a teeny bit guilty they didn't try to breastfeed, breastfeeding moms wonder if formula feeding would have just been easier, working moms feel mommy guilt of not being around their kids as often, stay at home moms feel less validation for their job. Like a pp said, the internet is more anonymous, and it's an easier place for someone to go off on their views in a way they may not to their neighbor (even if they still think the same things). It doesn't really make sense to me, and I definitely don't get all of the judgemental views of parenting, but we all want to think that WE are doing the best job out there, so anyone who does something differently MUST be doing it wrong.

 

[disykat]

Many times, people are actually ASKING for opinions. It's kind of a pet peeve of mine to get bawled out for giving an opinion when it was asked for.

I do agree with you, however, on discussion threads. Sometimes people need to just stay out of a discussion that has nothing to do with them or their opinions.