Invited to a Chinese wedding banquet

[Mish19]

I keep meaning to post this question so since it's raining today I've decided to ask.

My co-worker has invited me to a Chinese Wedding banquet. He and his bride have already gotten married and I'm invited to the banquet. It is at a restaurant in Chinatown (NYC).

How should I dress? I am going to look up Chinese traditions for a guest at a Chinese wedding later but if anyone knows offhand I would really appreciate it.

Thanks!

 

[mommytotwo]

I would think that slacks and a nice top would be fine. Since it's a get together at a chinese restaurant, it sounds casual.

 

[ItsonlyExperiment626]

Dress as you would dress if you were going to a wedding receiption after a wedding. Also bring a wedding gift. You are also going to eat authentic chinese food not what you would find at your Panda Express at the malls. Expect to see the whole chicken and fish which means head and all. These are usual served at these dinners and each has a meaning. Chicken for luck, fish for wealth, so don't be freaked out. Have a good time and if you are open minded, you'll have a wonderful meal.

 

[EthansMom]

I think its also considered to be bad luck to give a gift of knives in many Asian countries.

 

[AnnetteF]

The fact that they are calling it a "wedding banquet", would lead me to believe that people should dress as they would for any other wedding reception. Even though the actual ceremony has already taken place, it is still a celebration of their marriage and I wouldn't assume it is casual. I had the opportunity to attend a Thai wedding several years ago for one of my co-workers. It was one of the most memorable weddings I have ever attended. The ceremony took place in the same room where the reception was later held and was a traditional Thai ceremony with the bride and all of the family in traditional Thai wedding attire, which I can only describe as something similar to Japanese kimonos, but everyone looked beautiful. After the ceremony, the bride changed into a white wedding gown because she wanted the opportunity to wear both. The reception had a band that played both traditional Thai music and popular music and the food was catered , I believe, by a restaurant in Chinatown. The whole thing was very formal and they really went all out!
I also think you would be more comfortable being over dressed rather than underdressed. Go and enjoy, and if it is anything like the wedding I attended, you are in for a great time!

 

[disykat]

I would dress up. Years ago (before internet) dh and I (actually I think he was my fiance at the time) went to the reception of one of his coworkers. We were totally ignorant. DH was the only one from work invited so there wasn't even anyone to confer with.

First, there were two weddings going on in the restaurant. We couldn't read the signs and ended up at the wrong one. We accidently signed in on a silk cloth at the wrong wedding! After we figured that out and retrieved our gift (Oh, sooooo embarassing!), we were seated with the one table of English speaking guests. One gal was a Chinese American married to a caucasion and she sort of translated for us, but wasn't able to do a word for word.

She told us some of the traditions. The wedding couple came to each table and poured tea - at which point we were to give them gold coins - something none of us were prepared for. There is also something about numbers when you give the wedding gifts, so you might want to check into that. I can't remember whether it was even/odd, multiples of three, or whatever - I just remember there was something about numbers.

We had a great time. It was hilarious because they had sort of master of ceremony and lots of joking and laughing - and we had no clue what was going on. We obviously didn't know what was going on, but no one cared. The bride and groom were very gracious and other family members also stopped by our table to greet us in English.

The one I went to was very fancy with the bride changing clothes several times, etc. It was evidently a combination of Vietnamese and Chinese traditions.

 

[Kimberle]

I believe red is the color for good luck.

 

[ImarriedGrumpy]

Don't wear white - it's the color of mourning. And red is indeed the color to wear for good luck. If it's a traditional Chinese event, the bride will be wearing red.

Other traditional things - round tables with 10 people at each table, and several courses served on a "lazy susan" in the middle of the table, one course at a time, with the servers scooping out food for everyone and clearing empty dishes away. Brush up on your chopsticks skills - or be prepared to ask for a fork. For most Chinese weddings, it is a matter of honor for the parents to throw a "lavish" reception with lots of good food, so it's a big feast!
Have fun! I love traditional Chinese wedding receptions - we've been to several and it's always a wonderful time.

 

[MouseWorshipin]

I'd ask my co-worker how I should dress.

 

[adamak]

Don't wear black. That's for sure. Anything you would wear to a wedding is fine.

You WILL have a great time. I can almost assure you that it'll be one of the best meal you'll ever have. Most eloborate for sure. Chinese people know how to eat and throw a great party.
My advices -
1. Try to eat everything. We chinese (or maybe just my family) get offended easily if you think certain food is wierd, or constantly asking "what is this".
2. Know when to say no. They will keep shoving food at you if you don't. (I know it's a contradiction to the above, but the trick is to try a little bit of every dish). You know, most wedding banquet lasts 6-7 hours.
3. Know your limit, alcohol or foodwise. If you have dietary restriction, let the table know ahead of time. Then they'll let you off easier.
4. Have fun. It'll be great. Let us know how it goes.

 

[Mish19]

Thanks for the replies! Whenever I've gone to a wedding I've been a bridemaid so I'm really stuck with the outfit thing. I did buy a skirt, cami, sweater set but I'm not sure if that's good enough.

I will get a red envelope and write a check in some form of 8 denomination, I've heard 8 is a good number in chinese tradition.