Internet in Kids Room

[Tanuki]

I thought you couldn't "accidentally" stumble on stuff on the internet until the day I decided to do a little preliminary shopping for furniture. So I went to a sofa website and the next link I hit to look at a couch went directly to a site with ads which were two adults with no clothes on in the bed enjoying some sort of "marital aid". I was shocked. I think your kid could easily be directed to stuff you may not want them to see just based on that experience.

 

[friendofgusgus]

Parental controls on AOL used to allow you to limit site acess but my kids were able to get around them after a year or so.

Honestly, I would not trust any program unless it updates continuously since there are people whose jobs exist only for the purpose of defeating such things. This is why our computers are unrestricted - many of the programs available have been shown to create a false sense of security when, in fact, they are quite easily outwitted.

 

[SHAYMARAYSMOM]

my DD who is 21 had internet in her room at a young age. She never went on anything bad. I also had the IT guy from work come and set it up with a program that would not allow her to enter sites with key words in them.

 

[NYPDwife]

My kids have their own computer in the living room. I have MSN with parental controls so they can't access any website I haven't approved. It may be a hassle to stop what I'm doing and approve sites, but I'd rather they didn't see all the nasty, dirty stuff that can be linked to from innocent sites like Google. Even with the parental controls, I still keep the computer in view so they can't get into trouble. It's a crazy world out there and while a computer program will help you with the bad websites, nothing will do the job like you can.

 

[Cantw8]

Here's the way I look at it....yes, you can somewhat control what goes on in your own home but you can not control what your kids can do in their friend's homes. Some parents work and aren't around, some parents just don't care...if you make the internet a big "taboo" mystery, kids are going to naturally be drawn to it You need to set guidelines and have a bit of trust, if that trust is thrown back in your face then the internet goes

 

[christineann]

That was not the only reason my kids didn't have computers or TV's in their rooms. Friends have asked me how my kids and I have always been so close; some just don't see how they can do that since their kids are usually in their rooms watching TV or on their computers. This is just another point to consider, one that was a good balance that worked for us.

 

[JimmyPicker]

My kids have their own computer in the living room. I have MSN with parental controls so they can't access any website I haven't approved. It may be a hassle to stop what I'm doing and approve sites, but I'd rather they didn't see all the nasty, dirty stuff that can be linked to from innocent sites like Google. Even with the parental controls, I still keep the computer in view so they can't get into trouble. It's a crazy world out there and while a computer program will help you with the bad websites, nothing will do the job like you can.

This is kind of what I'm hoping to do. No, it won't be in my immediate viewing area, but I'm hoping to stop any site from coming up unless it's disney or webkinz or something like that, something I've pre-approved.

Also, Lara, thanks for the advice about doing something that he can't access the net unless we turn it on for him. If I know exactly when he's online, I can be super stealthy spy mom.

 

[LUVMYTINK]

When I was younger my mom had a list of web sites I was alowed to go onto (such as nick, disney, barbie, and so on) and those were the only sites I was alowed on unless I asked 1st. You could do this by putting websites you think are fine in a favorites list and tell you child to only go to these sites. It always worked for me but it depends on how rebeliouse your child would be about it.

That's what we did with our oldest. He usually only goes online to play games on Cartoon Network and he also knows not to converse with anyone that is not on his list of contacts unless DH or myself knows the person and gives him permission.

Well color me a bad parent because we actually let my six year old go to webkins in her room. (Yet another point in my bad parent book).

Hi there fellow bad parent

Here's the way I look at it....yes, you can somewhat control what goes on in your own home but you can not control what your kids can do in their friend's homes. Some parents work and aren't around, some parents just don't care...if you make the internet a big "taboo" mystery, kids are going to naturally be drawn to it You need to set guidelines and have a bit of trust, if that trust is thrown back in your face then the internet goes

That is exactly how we feel too.

 

[phinsphan]

Our house has 4 different computers in it. 2 laptops and 2 desktops. We use k9 and I love it!!!

K9 is a parent internet filtering program that is free. You can set it so that if your child tries to access a blocked site it barks like a dog. You can also set a timer on it that will shut the computer down for a block of time. I have my older kids computers set to shut down at 9pm and not be available until 8am the next day.

It has parental control so you can set up more sites than what it blocks but from what we've seen blocked it blocks sites like youtube, myspace, p2p sites and many others.

From their website: Blue Coat's unique Web filtering technology divides Internet content into 60 distinct categories. These categories are stored in the master Blue Coat database, through which we maintain and update more than 15 million ratings of websites and domains. A Web site will fall into one or more of these categories, based on the content of the site. To meet your particular needs and preferences, you can configure the software to block or allow specific categories.

You can learn more here
http://www1.k9webprotection.com/


Hope that helps!!!!!!!!!

 

[christineann]

Love the dog barking alert - that's a great idea!

 

[phinsphan]

Love the dog barking alert - that's a great idea!

Yep it's awesome. I've busted many a kid with that bark! It's awesome!

 

[SHAYMARAYSMOM]

That was not the only reason my kids didn't have computers or TV's in their rooms. Friends have asked me how my kids and I have always been so close; some just don't see how they can do that since their kids are usually in their rooms watching TV or on their computers. This is just another point to consider, one that was a good balance that worked for us.

My DD had a TV and PC in her room. She also had other things in her room. SHe is very close to us and has alway been.
A child can have these things in their rooms and you can still be close to them.

 

[TDC Nala]

I think the best move would be to reconsider having unsupervised home internet access for a child, even with a filtering program.

 

[christineann]

Shamaraysmom, that's why I pointed out that the balance worked for us. Some people I know spend very little time with their kids, even when they are home together. I raised two children by myself after my divorce, and spending time together rather than in separate rooms kept the lines of communication open and kept us "grounded". Fourteen years later, I'm glad we did.

 

[Momvic5]

Bsafeonline.com offers great family internet protection.

 

[wtpntigger2]

To answer your question...

We have NoodleNet installed on our computers. Not only can our dd only go to approved websites by NoodleNet or added by us, but she cannot access anything on the desktop of the computer.

 

[MoniqueU]

What do people do that have alot mote then one kid and parents and all that are all hooked to the net? I have a main computer in my great room and can see that my son is playing some war game. I have my laptop down here and will rarely share it. My DD's have computers with net access in their rooms, one is down because the youngest doesnt get that you can't just download everything on earth and not get a virus. The older DD we have some websites blocked like myspace, I have no use for that site.
But every single one of us are all hooked on the internet. There is no way we like to share and I don't have room to set up 6 computers down in my great room. And all of us like our laptops better then the desktops.
I have warned my kids about the dangers, monitor as much as I can but if the six of us had to share a few computers there would be a riot.

 

[audrabolster]

i ve heard good things about net nanny-but honestly-as someone who works internet security and that sort of thing for the military-NO CHILD should have unsupervised internet access -even adults can get sucked into situations they can not deal with effectively-and the world is full of people with issues-even those programs that you think are "safe" or sites that you dont sensor can lead to problems-ANY site with a chat function is dangerous.

Yes. this. Growing up, our computer was in the den where everyone was. There is too much going on the internet nowadays, that I can't imagine a kid having a computer in their room at 9 years old.

 

[LaraK]

What do people do that have alot mote then one kid and parents and all that are all hooked to the net? I have a main computer in my great room and can see that my son is playing some war game. I have my laptop down here and will rarely share it. My DD's have computers with net access in their rooms, one is down because the youngest doesnt get that you can't just download everything on earth and not get a virus. The older DD we have some websites blocked like myspace, I have no use for that site.
But every single one of us are all hooked on the internet. There is no way we like to share and I don't have room to set up 6 computers down in my great room. And all of us like our laptops better then the desktops.
I have warned my kids about the dangers, monitor as much as I can but if the six of us had to share a few computers there would be a riot.

Computers outnumber people in my house. My four year old knows how to manipulate simple commands on the computer. As technology continues to explode I want my kids to be as comfortable with the changes as possible. I figure it will give them a leg up later in life.

I think the challenge is creating a balance between security and stifling kids. As a parent, I can't be there to insulate them forever. I'd rather concentrate on teaching right from wrong and spending as much time as possible instilling good street sense in them so they know how to cope.

My father always taught me that the art of parenting was teaching your children to make it on their own and encouraging them to do at the earliest opportunity. I'm not as ready to do that as my parents were, but I do try to strike that balance. The conversation about "don't take candy from strangers" just sounds different than it did when we were kids.

 

[Pigeon]

And for the lurkers (you know who you are), I know "some people are just idiots" but tell me how you really feel. If I were an idiot, he'd already have it and I would be venting about how he's watching porn and what am I going to do now instead of asking about software. But you'll be the first to know when I find a naughty magazine under his bed because I know you live for that stuff.

And maybe, just maybe people's motivations are a little more benign. Nobody wants your child to be hurt, and I think the responses you have gotten are about keeping your child safe, not about living for other people's embarrassment.

Honestly, I'm thinking "some people are just idiots." Kids are curious and sometime, particularly in the adolescent years think they are much wiser than they are. Kids also learn a whole lot more about technology than their parents realize, including ways around filtering programs. There are a lot of really bad people out there who use the net to get to kids. We just had a girl picked up with a pedophile in our community who lured her on the net. It's scary stuff and it's real. If your kid decides he wants to get around a filtering program, chances are good he'll be able to and you won't know a thing about it.