Inspired by "holiday weekend weddings".. Invitations..

[C.Ann]

Do you view them as exactly that - "invitations" - or treat them like a "summons", meaning mandatory attendance?

And this would apply to all occasions - not just weddings..

When I receive an invitation I view it as having been "invited" to attend whatever - meaning I have the option of accepting or declining without feeling pressured or guilty..

How does everyone else feel?

 

[Aimeedyan]

Invitation, I never feel obligated to attend anything... if I dont wanna go, I dont go =)

 

[Rutt and Tuke]

invitation

 

[stinkerbelle]

from family - summons
from friends - invitations

however I wished SOME people in my family would have at least acknowledged the fact that I got married. Once I couldn't attend a cousins wedding (was in college - smack during finals - so I sent a card with a check...luckily I got a thank you 8 months later)

JMO

 

[becka]

I consider it an invitation 99.9% of the time unless it is for a very big family event involving a very close relative (i.e. sister's wedding, etc.) then I guess it is more of a summons.

 

[Scratch42]

I know when I did the dirty deed, since I was from Toronto and he was from CT, it was decided by his parents that it would be a US Long Weekend. That way those that were travelling would have the extra day without having to take the day off!

I did not expect anyone to ruin their weekend just for the sake of a wedding!

If you get invited to something, it is up to you whether or not you want to attend! It's also up to you whether you want to give a gift or not.

I usually decide when I find out who is catering! If the eats are good then I'll go!

Scratch

 

[Christine]

If it is close family I feel that I am expected to go. However, if I did not and I called with a valid excuse I would still be loved.

For friends, I consider it an invitation and if I treasure my long weekend more than going to the wedding I will decline the invitation.

 

[luv2nascar]

I hate holiday weekend wedding
cousin getting married New Years Eve -yuck
I have two kids and would probably need an overnight babysitter
my inlaws are the only ones who watch my kids overnight
and they go to Atlantic City every New Years Eve
so no babysitter so we can not go
I wish they would have picked a different time to get married
it is a problem for me so I hope they have a good time and are happy

 

[Kitty 34]

Family members.....it's a definite must

Others.......invitation

 

[Beth76]

You forgot another option: gift request.

My mom gets invitations from the most random people and always sends a gift. I know this used to be the custom, but I feel it's very outdated. I think now people are just fishing for gifts. (I mean the people who invite distant friends or friends of parents, people they don't really know)

 

[arminnie]

The only time I would consider it a command performance would be for my sister or brother's wedding or for my parents' 50th wedding anniversary.

Anything else including brother and sister birthdays would be optional. I've missed the weddings of some of my best friends because I couldn't get off work, couldn't afford to travel to the wedding, had other commitments. Okay I'll admit sometimes I made sure I had another commitment if I didn't approve of the marriage!

When we had the 50th for my parents we had a very large reception during the day and then a dinner/dance for family only that night. Family only was over 100 people. We invited all of the aunts, uncles, cousins, etc. I was really surprised that so many of them came. I was glad that they did but sure didn't hold it against anyone who didn't come.

Maybe it's because I so often lived 1500 miles away from family and couldn't attend every cousin's wedding that I don't feel bad about declining.

 

[stinkerbelle]

Originally posted by arminnie
Okay I'll admit sometimes I made sure I had another commitment if I didn't approve of the marriage!

omg - I TOTALLY did that recently! Told my friend that I wouldn't be able to go to her wedding cause I'd be in Disney.

guess where she's getting married? yep...disney.

I think she's figured out that I don't approve of it now though...

 

[arminnie]

Originally posted by stinkerbelle
omg - I TOTALLY did that recently! Told my friend that I wouldn't be able to go to her wedding cause I'd be in Disney.

guess where she's getting married? yep...disney.

I think she's figured out that I don't approve of it now though...

That is so funny!

 

[Crankyshank]

Depends on how much grief I'll get from my Mother if I ditch the event

 

[newholiday]

we were invited to 2 weddings in July - we declined both

 

[Christine]

Originally posted by luv2nascar
I hate holiday weekend wedding
cousin getting married New Years Eve -yuck
I have two kids and would probably need an overnight babysitter
my inlaws are the only ones who watch my kids overnight
and they go to Atlantic City every New Years Eve
so no babysitter so we can not go
I wish they would have picked a different time to get married
it is a problem for me so I hope they have a good time and are happy

luv2nascar:

I kind of agree with you on this one. I don't mind holiday weekend weddings but not around the Christmas Holidays. I remember when I got married, I wanted a wedding in December. My mom said "no, not in December. People are getting ready for the holidays and spending time with family--that time is off limits." I was fairly young then and didn't really get it, but I do now. Most people have long-standing traditions/commitments over the Christmas holiday (which extends past New Years) and people with children definitely are in a pinch as the kids are off school, babysitters are out of town etc. New Year's is one weekend I think people should stay away from for weddings.