In search of my body...not the one I ate!

[keenercam]

Dawn -- You are one amazing person. I started reading because I thought your post was fun and entertaining. I kept reading because you had so much to say that we all WISH we had the courage to admit to. And I am looking forward to visiting and sharing your journey.

I am scrambling at work right now as I plow through my last week before heading off to Orlando for the Disney Marathon. But I wanted to at least take the time to tell you that I really appreciate the courage it takes to share yourself and your family with the rest of your WISH family. Thank you! I can't wait to come back and read more and share this journey with everyone you've brought together here!

 

[Dizneydawn]

Dizneydawn - you just layed it all out there.

I can totally relate to being in a relationship where only one person is responsible for everything that happens.

My husband was shocked my second child was a girl. Like that was NEVER an option. And of course that was my problem, (but I have to add, I AM SO GLAD SHE WAS A GIRL!)

Anyway, thanks for sharing all that. Sounds like your taking back your life on your terms. Which is the whole point.

I am taking my life back...I am proud of myself and scared as heck at the same time. Thank you for sharing your piece of the puzzle as well and thanks for knowing that you are a treasured member of this thread.

Dawn -- You are one amazing person. I started reading because I thought your post was fun and entertaining. I kept reading because you had so much to say that we all WISH we had the courage to admit to. And I am looking forward to visiting and sharing your journey.

I am scrambling at work right now as I plow through my last week before heading off to Orlando for the Disney Marathon. But I wanted to at least take the time to tell you that I really appreciate the courage it takes to share yourself and your family with the rest of your WISH family. Thank you! I can't wait to come back and read more and share this journey with everyone you've brought together here!

Courage and stupidity are only a few moments away from each other....so I will be carefull!! Thanks for the appreciation.

I am going to join you next year at the marathon. I want to have a moment for me that I prove to myself. I am so proud you can be at that point.

I hope your week is good and your life this year is full of blessings and delight.

 

[Dizneydawn]

Thank you to everyone who has PM'd me their weight so far...please know you still have time to get yor tukkus on the line for this 1st weigh in and weight progress!

Take that first step and look at the scale and know it tells only a piece of your life...not the whole life and not the most important one.

It is though a piece that will help you move in the right direction because the first step is not denial!!!!
***NOTE TO SELF...TRIED THAT BUT MY SIZE 6 JEANS TOLD ON ME WHEN THEY BLEW APART AT A RESTARUNT MAMING 2 WAITERS AND KILLING AN ELDERLY PATRON.

TOTALLY NOT MY FAULT BTW...I YELLED DUCK AND IF YOU CAN'T HEAR DUE TO OLD AGE...GET A HEARING AID.

 

[keenercam]

Thank you so much for your kind words, Dawn. I've come a long way to be at a point where I like myself. If you get a chance, you can check out my WISH journal -- it's called "Cam's New Lease on Life". I had to be nearly dying for almost 10 years to get to a point where I learned to actually live like I was dying, and to appreciate every day, and to truly work (at least most of the time) to be a person who I thought my friends and family might miss when I was gone. Instead, I got a miracle. And the joke's on them! They're stuck with me! (Sorry. Didn't mean to hijack your thread! : )

Finishing the 2006 WDW Half Marathon was literally the proudest moment of my life. I am so excited that you will get to have that experience. I know you can do it. You certainly have the strength of will and an indomitable spirit. And LOTS of WISH friends to support you along the way!

 

[SeptemberGirl]

When I sat down to read this thread tonight, I was all over the place. Had a fight with my husband today (about money, which we almost never fight about), a 3yr old who won't settle down and go to sleep, a trip to leave on tomorrow and five tons of laundry, housework, and errands around me...and oh, yeah, paid work to do, too! I hadn't feed myself dinner and I was in the midst of trying to do 10 things at once.

Deep breath!

But reading the last few posts really made me feel happy to be on this thread. I am lucky to have stumbled upon all of you who are willing to share your stories and support each other.

One thing I want to add, there is no shame in your number. What you weigh is just a number, it's not you. We will all be proud with each pound we lose and the number we end up at, but that number that makes us feel bad about ourselves - it's meaningless. We are so much more than that. And you and I know that, but sometimes it's hard to remember.

So my number...my heaviest I was 242. My starting weight on Oct 24, 2007, was 237. I am now 212.2. (Almost 25 lbs!) I want to be 155...or around there. It's a big goal, I like baby steps!

Those numbers only tell you my weight, not my worth. I'm not going to be ashamed of them anymore. But I respect anyone who wants to keep it private!

And for me, part of my story is being a perfectionist...being very organized and put together but never feeling like it's good enough because there's always something more I could do. I need to ditch that along the way. No one is perfect, and no one expects me to be...maybe that should be over my mirror in the morning!

 

[VernRDH]

Dawn- Thank you for sharing that about yourself. We all have something in our life that plays a part in who we are, but does not define us.

I have battled my weight since I was in high school. I was 190 pounds before DH and I got married. Then came my saving grace Redux. Wonder Drug. Lost 30 pounds before we actually said I Do. Was 160 on my DisneyMoon. Then complacency kicked in. The weight came back. I was 197 when I got pregnant with DD. Only gained 11 pounds during my pregnancy. Had toxemia, on bed rest the last 3 weeks. But DD was fine, aside from a pinched nerve in her shoulder which resolved quickly. Went home and put on regular clothes. Then the weight piled on again. And I yoyo dieted. Lost, gained, lost, gained. DH did the same. I had gestational diabetes when I was pregnant and my dr. told me that if I didn't lose the weight, I would get diabetes by 40 years old. My mother passed away in Dec of 2003, rocking my world. My mother was ill for most of her life, and I knew deep in my heart that she would not live to be old and gray. But I was not ready to lose her that soon. My DD was only 4 and my SIL was pregnant with their only child. I became the rock for many and had large shoes to fill. And food was a comfort, a friend. It reminded me of my mother, making the things she made or liked. And most of our weekends involved my dad and bro and sis in law and EATING.

In 2006, I had to have my gall bladder out. Fat, female, fertile, forty-the 4 F's for gall bladders gone bad. (I had 3 out of 4) And in the middle of this, we tried (unsuccessfully) to adopt a child. It was my friends niece, very long story on why she needed a home, but anywho, things did not go well for the 2 months she lived with us. There was therapy for all while she was here and for us after she left. Unfortunately, we had already planned our trip to WDW for Dec 06 with our friends as an adoption celebration, thinking that we would be finalized. Our friends were barely speaking to us, but refused to cancel out, insisting that things were "okay". It was miserable, I was miserable. And the topper was that the weather was chilly for Florida in Dec and I had to spend a lot of time with my nemesis: jeans. Yep, like a big ole hot Italian sausage stuffed in its casing. And I got more miserable. So when we got back I decided that enough was enough. I could not control what anyone else did, but I could control ME. And my body. And how it looked. And how how it looked made me feel. And I took action. Every journey begins with a single step. Mine was then. I had hit rock bottom and there was only one way to go-up (actually down, but ya know what I mean).

SO here I am almost a year after I started this journey (I started WW on 2/1/07) and have lost 50 lbs. I feel better, look better and have lost not only weight, but baggage. I have let go the feelings of loss over the adoption that didn't happen. You never get over losing your mom, but it gets better as time goes by. I am done with the drama that is my father and his "female dog in heat" of a girlfriend. I am doing this for ME. I am the doer-I do for everyone else and neglect myself. Well not any more. I am making myself a priority. And while I will not be a supermodel, supermom or supernanny anytime soon, I will be the best person I can for myself, my husband and my daughter. Because they matter most to me.

Thank you for reading the only slightly abridge version of War and Peace-oh sorry. I meant my life.

Its nice to have friends here, people who understand where you are coming from. Dawn has paid me a wonderful compliment, by asking me for help and advice, and I hope that I can help her and anyone else.

Okay, sap fest over. Feel free to talk among yourselves or return to the All Tupperware channel for the latest in burping bowls!

Edited to add: Since there is no shame in numbers, I show my weights on my weight loss ticker. While I am not "proud" that I was 215 pounds, its reality and I won't hide it. Or from it. So there, 215, I thumb my nose at you. You are gone forever from my life, adios, sayonara, hasta la vista, baby. Look out 115, here I come.

 

[SeptemberGirl]

Dawn- Thank you for sharing that about yourself. We all have something in our life that plays a part in who we are, but does not define us.

I have battled my weight since I was in high school. I was 190 pounds before DH and I got married. Then came my saving grace Redux. Wonder Drug. Lost 30 pounds before we actually said I Do. Was 160 on my DisneyMoon. Then complacency kicked in. The weight came back. I was 197 when I got pregnant with DD. Only gained 11 pounds during my pregnancy. Had toxemia, on bed rest the last 3 weeks. But DD was fine, aside from a pinched nerve in her shoulder which resolved quickly. Went home and put on regular clothes. Then the weight piled on again. And I yoyo dieted. Lost, gained, lost, gained. DH did the same. I had gestational diabetes when I was pregnant and my dr. told me that if I didn't lose the weight, I would get diabetes by 40 years old. My mother passed away in Dec of 2003, rocking my world. My mother was ill for most of her life, and I knew deep in my heart that she would not live to be old and gray. But I was not ready to lose her that soon. My DD was only 4 and my SIL was pregnant with their only child. I became the rock for many and had large shoes to fill. And food was a comfort, a friend. It reminded me of my mother, making the things she made or liked. And most of our weekends involved my dad and bro and sis in law and EATING.

In 2006, I had to have my gall bladder out. Fat, female, fertile, forty-the 4 F's for gall bladders gone bad. (I had 3 out of 4) And in the middle of this, we tried (unsuccessfully) to adopt a child. It was my friends niece, very long story on why she needed a home, but anywho, things did not go well for the 2 months she lived with us. There was therapy for all while she was here and for us after she left. Unfortunately, we had already planned our trip to WDW for Dec 06 with our friends as an adoption celebration, thinking that we would be finalized. Our friends were barely speaking to us, but refused to cancel out, insisting that things were "okay". It was miserable, I was miserable. And the topper was that the weather was chilly for Florida in Dec and I had to spend a lot of time with my nemesis: jeans. Yep, like a big ole hot Italian sausage stuffed in its casing. And I got more miserable. So when we got back I decided that enough was enough. I could not control what anyone else did, but I could control ME. And my body. And how it looked. And how how it looked made me feel. And I took action. Every journey begins with a single step. Mine was then. I had hit rock bottom and there was only one way to go-up (actually down, but ya know what I mean).

SO here I am almost a year after I started this journey (I started WW on 2/1/07) and have lost 50 lbs. I feel better, look better and have lost not only weight, but baggage. I have let go the feelings of loss over the adoption that didn't happen. You never get over losing your mom, but it gets better as time goes by. I am done with the drama that is my father and his "female dog in heat" of a girlfriend. I am doing this for ME. I am the doer-I do for everyone else and neglect myself. Well not any more. I am making myself a priority. And while I will not be a supermodel, supermom or supernanny anytime soon, I will be the best person I can for myself, my husband and my daughter. Because they matter most to me.

Thank you for reading the only slightly abridge version of War and Peace-oh sorry. I meant my life.

Its nice to have friends here, people who understand where you are coming from. Dawn has paid me a wonderful compliment, by asking me for help and advice, and I hope that I can help her and anyone else.

Okay, sap fest over. Feel free to talk among yourselves or return to the All Tupperware channel for the latest in burping bowls!

Edited to add: Since there is no shame in numbers, I show my weights on my weight loss ticker. While I am not "proud" that I was 215 pounds, its reality and I won't hide it. Or from it. So there, 215, I thumb my nose at you. You are gone forever from my life, adios, sayonara, hasta la vista, baby. Look out 115, here I come.

Rock on, you! It was very inspiring to read your story.

And it's all perspective, numbers, isn't it? Your 215 is not that same as mine...I'm proud to be 212 and not 237. And I'll be proud to be halfway through, too, even though your halfway point is nearly my end point! I look at 164 and think, WOW! That would be so skinny for me! I guess what I'm saying is it's not the numbers, it's how we feel. Partly. Or maybe I'm just babbling, I'm tired and my brain is mush.

Great journey, great story. Go you!

 

[Dizneydawn]

September Girl and Vern...
You both made me feel so much more grateful tonight. This group can be one of real friends and real lives and real pounds and real weight loss.

I believe it will be a good day when we all can meet and be great friends in person too.

By the Way....I live 20 minutes from the Mall Of America so if you ever want a Dis Meet here and a chance to shop and reaward our new sizes...we can swing it pretty cheap!!!

I meant inexpensive cheap..not floosy cheap!

 

[Dizneydawn]

I am going to have a better eating day today....I am going to have a better eating day today....

I did awesome yesterday....until 11 p.m. and then...had a Butterfinger....King size...I swear it taunted me....saying....you are so hungry.....you ate supper at 5 and look what time it is.....don't ya want my crunchy goodness.....look how much my chocolate wants you....

So I know I tried almonds beforehand...they were not killing the pangs and my overwhelming urge.

I think I screwed up because I did not eat a few hours after supper...I should have had a yogurt or something to avoid crashing....I also should not have had a King Size Butterfinger in the house....and if I would have been in bed by then...I probably wouldn't of eaten it in my sleep.

On to a new day...will be clocking in excersize today with swimming and plan on an hour of moderate swim....Not falling off today if I can help it...

Treyner won ticets on a radio station to the MN Timberwolves B-Ball game tonight...they include 2 drinks and appetizers at a swanky restarant before and main floor tickets.

I will not have any alcohol tonight...diet coke...and try to not have any bad appetizers...(Do they have any good ones???)

The funny part is that he won them on a womans talk radio station I listen to...he did not understand when he called...it was for ladies night at the game!!! So he was asked if he would bring his mom....did I mention I dislike B-Ball... We will have fun though!

 

[DisneyWorld Delight]

I did bad yesterday too. Not bad like 2 weeks ago when I wasn't even trying, but bad like this.

I went to the grocery store and bought good groceries. No candy, no chocolate bars, no two bite brownies (really only one bite right? So then you have to actually eat two to make them two bite brownies.)

So I got home with all my goodies and it's like I had to fill my gorging quota. While making dinner, (baked chicken breasts, baked potatoes and brocolli in butter sauce) I had a 100 calorie bag of Pepperidge Farm cookies and and few Ritz crackers, (7) and started eating fat free fig newtons. WTH is wrong with me?

I did walk on the treadmill last night and this morning already, which is SUPER good for me. I just keep dreaming about walking and having my butt actually walk with me, instead of trailing behind and slamming into me when I stop. Now thats luxury.

DDawn, have fun tonight. Good luck with the app's. Those are my favorite. (The Butterfinger was a good selection too. I'd have been dissappointed had you went to the dark side for a Milky Way, or even worse, and Nestle Crunch.)

 

[keenercam]

Dawn -- I am sorry that evil Butterfinger tempted you so much. For me, it's salty items. I splurged on mini pretzels from a cheez-it party mix and some tortilla chips. And the whole time I was doing it, I wasn't even enjoying it because I felt so guilty! UGH! I hope you enjoy the night out tonight. Appetizers are a huge weekness for me. I'm not sure what to recommend, but maybe just moderation. Yeah, I know that is supposedly the key to all my problems. LOL!!

DDD -- I am just like that. Cooking really good, healthy food and snacking the whole time. WHY do I do that? Okay, I know the strategies that I should follow. I just have to follow them, right? Here are the things that have worked for me in the past -- chewing gum while preparing dinner; opening a can of cut green beans and picking at those instead of chips, etc. (I really enjoy them right out of the can, and sometimes with garlic and lemon sprinkled, but eating them plain as finger food works as well); cutting up a cucumber and noshing on that or on grape tomatoes while cooking. Okay, having remembered what worked in the past should help me do that in the future.

 

[milestogo]

Phyllis Diller is a comedian from the 70's and early 80's who was a riot and had a potty mouth that she used! She always smoked a long stem cigarette and had a raspy voice. I am officially old at 36! Look her up on google!

BTW: who is Phyllis Diller?


Now I feel old! Going back to the first page of your thread (that I just found) I laughed so hard at this and thought you might get a smile out of a little bit of history:

I used to own a comedy club, grew up loving Phyllis Diller because she paved the way for all women on stage; while Lucille Ball was paving the way for women on television. Women weren't allowed to be funny in the mid 1950's. I'm 46 and the she was a decade before I was born. Here is a little bit about her. She is always good for a smile on any gloomy day. I love your thread, keep it going.

Diller was a housewife, mother, and advertising copywriter. In the mid-1950s, she made appearances on The Jack Paar Show and was a contestant on Groucho Marx's quiz show, You Bet Your Life. Later in the decade, her career took off after sold out San Francisco's legendary nightclub, The Purple Onion, for 87 straight weeks. This is where she cultivated her talent and perfected her act. In her heyday, Diller achieved a record that still stands today in the Guinness Book of World Records for delivering 12 punchlines per minute. She was The Monster's Mate in the Rankin/Bass animated cult classic Mad Monster Party (1967), co-starring Boris Karloff.

In 1998, Diller parlayed her unique cackle into the vocals for the Queen in Disney/Pixar's animated movie A Bug's Life. She created a stage character persona that was a wild-haired, eccentrically dressed housewife who made jokes about a fictional husband named "Fang" while smoking from a long cigarette holder. Another distinct characteristic is her cackling laugh, one of the best-recognized noises in comedy. Diller is given credit for opening the locked doors for the stand-up comedy field to women such as Rita Rudner, Totie Fields, Joan Rivers, Lily Tomlin, Sandra Bernhard, Joy Behar, Rosie O'Donnell and Roseanne Barr

 

[SeptemberGirl]

September Girl and Vern...
You both made me feel so much more grateful tonight. This group can be one of real friends and real lives and real pounds and real weight loss.

I believe it will be a good day when we all can meet and be great friends in person too.

By the Way....I live 20 minutes from the Mall Of America so if you ever want a Dis Meet here and a chance to shop and reaward our new sizes...we can swing it pretty cheap!!!

I meant inexpensive cheap..not floosy cheap!

I say I'm easy all the time...and my husband is like, "Honey, maybe you should use a different word."

Here's to meeting for new outfits!


On bad snacking...it's the worst, isn't it? I will keep doing things and neglect my hunger! Not a good thing, as it leads to those handfuls on M&M's and then I'm too full to eat my nice dinner. My WW leader says when you screw up, just start again with the next meal. A week is too much pressure, sometimes even a day...just take it meal by meal.

I'm leaving for WDW tonight! Wish me luck with my food choices while I'm away! I'll try to check in and say hi.

Okay, I have to go make myself lunch now!

 

[Dizneydawn]

I'm leaving for WDW tonight! Wish me luck with my food choices while I'm away! I'll try to check in and say hi.

I am so excited and jealous for you... do you have a pre-trippie to read...I will look at your sig more closely...I am wondering where you are eating at and staying??

I am going to make the promise to be more dedicated to my work next week also...We had a fire at our warehouse last month so we are now up and operational...I have a goal to make $100,000 a year 2 years from now...so I need to crunch the numbers...parties...recruits etc...

I will do that just like losing weight....
"How do you eat an elephant?"
One bite at a time!

Now I feel old! Going back to the first page of your thread (that I just found) I laughed so hard at this and thought you might get a smile out of a little bit of history:

I used to own a comedy club, grew up loving Phyllis Diller because she paved the way for all women on stage; while Lucille Ball was paving the way for women on television. Women weren't allowed to be funny in the mid 1950's. I'm 46 and the she was a decade before I was born. Here is a little bit about her. She is always good for a smile on any gloomy day. I love your thread, keep it going.

Diller was a housewife, mother, and advertising copywriter. In the mid-1950s, she made appearances on The Jack Paar Show and was a contestant on Groucho Marx's quiz show, You Bet Your Life. Later in the decade, her career took off after sold out San Francisco's legendary nightclub, The Purple Onion, for 87 straight weeks. This is where she cultivated her talent and perfected her act. In her heyday, Diller achieved a record that still stands today in the Guinness Book of World Records for delivering 12 punchlines per minute. She was The Monster's Mate in the Rankin/Bass animated cult classic Mad Monster Party (1967), co-starring Boris Karloff.

In 1998, Diller parlayed her unique cackle into the vocals for the Queen in Disney/Pixar's animated movie A Bug's Life. She created a stage character persona that was a wild-haired, eccentrically dressed housewife who made jokes about a fictional husband named "Fang" while smoking from a long cigarette holder. Another distinct characteristic is her cackling laugh, one of the best-recognized noises in comedy. Diller is given credit for opening the locked doors for the stand-up comedy field to women such as Rita Rudner, Totie Fields, Joan Rivers, Lily Tomlin, Sandra Bernhard, Joy Behar, Rosie O'Donnell and Roseanne Barr

Thanks for the awesome info...I hope you stay with us and I am so glad you at least giggle with my nutty thought process...my ex to be thinks no one can follow me but I think that he says that because he is stupid...and not very funny...and not very smart...and did i say stupid???

I am just kidding...well partially...he does still need Garanimals to match his clothes...that would make him....well...let's see...hmmm...oh yeah...stupid.

I know, I know...that is not nice...he is not stupid....just slower than me...sometimes slower than my niece...she is 3 months old BTW...

Alright...now I am just being mean and vindictive and spitefull and horrible...but not stupid....

Okay...so I am laughing and chuckling at my lame attempt to carry this one sided conversation on...I need to go on Fit day now and see how many carbs I lost for belly laughing

I really am kidding...not about the Garanimals though or about the fact he doesn't think anyone can follow me...

He has been known to explain to me that, "I am the smartest man you will ever know." Which honest to God above...if that is true than I am the sexiest woman you will ever know. Which is close to true if you don't count movie stars, models, TV Hosts, people with matching limbs and anyone with a single snaggle tooth and most of their skin missing due to a nasty case of poison ivy.

 

[Dizneydawn]

Well we have 6 people posting their weight both publically and privately so far.

Dizneydawn - 249#

Grumpy Young Guy -335#
(he feel he has gained and his inner scale is guessing but I told him to stop worrying about his inner and get to a scale somewhere...to be more official...we are official ya know... this is totally scientific and quantitative...ooohhh big word...aren't ya'll impressed??)

Debbie - private

VernRDH - 164.4#

September Girl - 212#

Disney Delight - Private and the first one to P.M. me her weight...THANK YOU



This will be are SUPER STARTING SEXY SIX...
Next week we will follow up with a thread loss and individual accolades!! Thanks to all and please...if I left you out...let me know...I want to include everyone whether you like it or not!!!

 

[DisneyWorld Delight]

...I want to include everyone whether you like it or not!!!

 

[Dizneydawn]

Just got an awsome pm from CHBC who just enjoyed what sounds to be a long and deserved vacation at our fave destination.

Please help me welcome her and let her know we suport all weight loss needs...big and small and everywhere inbetween.

 

[chbc]

Just read your PM. Thank you again. So very happy to be here. I am in it for the duration. I need support and I will support. Hope everyone is having a great day. I need to get on the treadmill. Still have not done that. I miss Mickey, Minnie, Tigger, Goofy, Pluto, Chip & Dale. I do not miss the Disney Dining Plan. It makes so much sense financially when you are going to eat at character meals, sit down dining and then when you add in the Christmas season price boost they tack on, but it does not make waist sense. I've had 2 Tupperware Thirstquakes today of water-if you are drinking out of a thirstquake it must be water. The laughs here are plenty, the honesty appreciated and I found a home here with my love for tupperware in helping to lose weight.

 

[Debbie]

...(he feel he has gained and his inner scale is guessing but I told him to stop worrying about his inner and get to a scale somewhere...to be more official...we are official ya know... this is totally scientific and quantitative...ooohhh big word...aren't ya'll impressed??)

I bought a scale last night. I bought a fancy, dancy Weight Watcher's scale with memory. That's 'cause I can't remember from one week to the next what I weighed in at. CRAFTs disease, ya know. I checked and it was pretty much right on with my original one. I'm hoping that I don't have to keep hopping on the scale to get a 'best of five' weight.

This will be are SUPER STARTING SEXY (SEVEN) ...

Oooh, we are DA BOMB!

 

[milestogo]

Hi all, Are we all ladies at this point? I am an almost psychologist finishing my final classes for my Ph.D and beginning my dissertation. I've been specializing in drug education for 12 years. Part of that work is all about why we behave the way we do and how it relates to the brain and the body. While many of my colleagues specialize in the dealing with our past, I specialize in being proactive, facing our obstacles and how to hurdle over them. While I obviously cannot be a practicing therapist on this thread, I'd be happy to offer myself as the thread counselor and help us all face our obstacles as we figure them out according to our weight goals. As you know I used to own a comedy club, so I'm a little more like Dr. Phil than Dr. Robin. Would that be helpful to anyone?