I'm really stressing over my kids missing school

[triplefigs]

to go to Disney in Sept. They will be in Kindergarten this fall and miss 5 days for this trip. My DS is special needs, and he does better in small crowds and needs a longer trip so we can go slowly. That's why Sept is so great for us! BUT... we are in a school district that is VERY STRICT about missing school. I can most likely get one of his MDs to write a letter to try to get the days excused, but I am still really worried that I'm making a big mistake.

I can change the trip to the week before Christmas and they won't miss any school. Downside is that the crowds will be much heavier, and we won't get the free dining.

I could really use some advice please. Having never had kids in public school before, I'm not sure how missing 5 days will affect them socially and academically. Thanks.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

I don't think 5 days is a big deal. If he had the flu he'd be out for at least a week so try to look at it that way. Also- I personally think family vacations are extremely important. Your son will learn so much in that week! My dh and I can't believe the hard time some of the schools give people. We feel that they are our kids and we will decide if they are taking time off of school. I am truly shocked by some of the things that parents have to go through! I can tell you that in my opinion it will not have any great effect on him socially or academically. You have to do what is best for you and your family. I say go for it! You will have a great time and the experience will be priceless.

 

[HeatherC]

I think it will work out just fine. I have 3 kids (5,7,9) and we have taken them out of school almost a week each year for the last couple years. This year my daughter who is in 3rd grade did have a lot of work to do before we left, but it wasn't a problem. I get very annoyed with schools dictating how and when I will vacation with my family. (Yes...I understand why they do it, but it still annoys me.)

There may be a little adjustment when you come back if your child is special needs, but you will have those memories for a lifetime. Especially because your children are in kindergarten, I say go and have fun!!! This is one week out of their school life. Believe me, they will not remember that week at school, but they will certainly remember their trip to Disney.

My vote is GO and have a wonderful wonderful time!!

Heather C

 

[DawnM]

No! Don't stress this, PLEASE! For one thing.....your child is very young. It will be fine.

Dawn

 

[FloridaTeacher]

School is important, but family time is more important.

Talk to your child's teacher. Explain that you are going on a trip. Tell him/her that you don't want your child to fall behind and would be happy to work with your child on any lessons that the teacher feels you could do together (luckily that's very doable in the lower grades).

Most teachers (myself included) will be happy to work with you. I would'nt worry about it affecting them socially, kids are out all the time for time periods a lot longer than a week - after you're back home and they're back at school it'll be like they never left.

One thing that does drive me nuts as a teacher is when I've worked my tail off (no, it's still there and bigger than ever )to get things together ahead of time for a student who will be out, and they come back with none of it completed!!!

 

[MommaluvsDis]

You know, 5 days is a long time to be missing school BUT your children can and will learn things on this trip that they can't in the classroom.

Check with your school board, school district, whatever you call it and ask if they have a program that excuses educational travel days. Ours did and the boys just have to write a 1 page report on something they learned on the trip. Of course, your's being in Kindergarten, you'd have to write it for them.

Ask the teacher for assignments so that they won't be behind. Of all the times to miss, this would be the best. At this point, the teacher is mainly still establishing rules, etc. Not that she's not teaching because I know everything in the classroom is a lesson.

But, most importantly, your children are going to have valuable family time together. These days, we tend to forget to shedule that in.

Go, enjoy, and have a great time with your family.

 

[In a hurry]

Missing 5 K classes isn't going to hurt a child academically and def. not socially. If you are concercned, take the time to work on letter/number recognition satnding in the very short Sept. lines. (1st grade teacher advice!)

I don't have any advice for the strictness of your district, though. Talking to your doc might be your best option.

OTOH, if you can't relax about it, change your plans. YOu don'e need stress and guilt hanging over you!

 

[DisneyMomx7]

Let me make you feel better. When my older kids were little we took them to Disney right before Labor Day for 10 days. They missed 5 days of school. One ds was in kindergarten. He just now got accepted to every law school he applied to - it obviously didn't hurt!

Really I've had kids in kindergarten that got sick for a whole week and they were fine when they got back. My youngest DS missed 5 days of Kindergarten in January when DH ran the marathon and he was fine when he went back. Go for the low crowds, free dining, and if you kids are like mine they'll like being able to swim in September as opposed to December. Have fun!

 

[owensamo]

I think it'll be fine. We're in a similar situation, though for 4-year old PreK. We had a trip planned that would get us back just in time four our DD's first day of PreK next year, but then the free dining package came along, and for what we were going to spend on new tickets we found we could extend our trip by 5 nights! How could we not?

So we have the reservations, but that takes us through the first week of school. DH's all worried about DD missing 2-3 days of 4 year old preK!! I can't believe it. I *might* worry if she didn't already know at least 3 kids in her class, the school *and* the teacher. Her grandma works there and she goes to the 3-year program 2 days a week now so I don't see it being a very stressful transition for her if she misses the first couple of days. DH has an email into her teacher and we haven't heard back yet, but the TA in her 3-year program did say "It's only 4y PreK."

I'm fairly sure we'll keep the reservation. DH is looking forward to the dining too much not to.

 

[3littleHalls]

DD is in Kindergarten and we made the decision for her to miss 5 days back in Feb. I worried about this ever since we booked the trip. I talked with other mothers who had taken their kids out and I also discussed it with her teacher. It worked out great, other than her missing the Valentines party, she made up her missed papers. We did lots of educational things on our trip as well. Just so you know the first few weeks of Kindergarten are about learning classroom rules, and getting the whole class on the same page. So, my DD spent the first grading period reviewing the things she learned in pre-k. I don't regret her missing school at all. That said, we are going back in Sept and she will miss 5 days of 1st grade...I am worried all over again. So I am trying convince myself it will be fine.

 

[Matt'sMom]

As others have stated, check with your school district (regarding policies) and speak with your children's' teacher(s) in advance... and chances are that everything will be fine.

We've taken our son out of school for WDW related trips during both second and fourth grade, and he missed c. 5 days each time without any problems at all. Teachers worked with us to see that he received most of his assignments a couple weeks in advance and could do the majority of the work prior to the trip. In second grade, he was actually ahead of the other students when we returned... and in both years he has earned straight A's and been on the honor roll every marking period. So missing a few days of classroom time certainly did not have any negative impact. And each year he has kept a journal of his travels (recording what he experienced and learned), taken his own photos, and brought back all sorts of special surprises (all with an educational element)... which he then shares with his class afterwards. I also always invite the teachers to come up with any special projects relative to our trip that they might want him to complete--which helps to further relate our trip to whatever they are currently studying in school.

In our case, our SD allows up to five days of excused/educational absences, and our trips have always been approved as 'educational' within days of my submitting the application. They do have restrictions though, regarding when a student may be excused for such trips--in our SD, they may not miss the first or last week of the school year, nor any of the weeks when the entire student body is scheduled for the standardized government testing. So, again, make certain to check with your school district prior to your trip, just in case any adjustments may be necessary.

 

[allboyz]

I have been stressing about this a lot too. My husband has been deployed for 6 months. He just got back. We were trying to swing it so that we could go during Spring Break. However, my husband's command will not allow him to take leave until later in April. So we will have to go the last week which means i will have to take the kids out. My middle son has missed A LOT of days this school year because he has been sick a lot this year. The school nurse said not to worry about it since it is all documented (many dr appts, tests,etc). So far it has not hurt his grades (he had 4 A's and 2 B's on his last report card. So we are just going to go for it. They truly need this family time.

ANYWAY, long story short I say GO and enjoy yourself! Just wanted to let you know that you are not the only one having this dilemma.

 

[Mommy Poppins]

My DH was also deployed for 18 months and just returned in February. Since this is prime income tax season for me, we can't go on a family vacation until after April 15. So we are leaving April 21 and the kids won't be back in school until May 8. They are missing 10 school days. Our district approves 5 days for educational trips. The other 5 are unexcused. I spoke with our principal and he said "Go, have a good time!" My kids are 4th grade, 1st grade and a 4 year old.

I definitely wouldn't worry about a week of kindergarten!

 

[jsbjeb]

Try not to stress about it. We have always taken our kids out of school for family/vacation time for a week during the school year. We have already taken them out this year and next year they will be in 7th and 5th grade and we plan on taking them out a week in Dec.

We just have fill out an "Educational Trip Request" paper and then have it approved by the administrators. Each year has been different regarding homework while we are gone, but we definately think it is worth it to spend the time together as a family!

 

[pedro2112]

A week of quality family time together on a vacation is much more important to a child's well being than a week of Kindergarten.

Enjoy!

 

[MomofCKJ]

Go and enjoy! Really missing a week of Kindergarden is not going to be much. I have am on my 2nd Kindergardener right now. If she missed a week there would be some alphabet papers and a whole lot of coloring that she would miss but that is about it. Nothing that will set him behind.

Allyson

 

[epcotitis]

I teach, I love disney, I hate it when my students miss school for the sniffles! You are a parent. Make a decision for the best needs of your family and DON'T let the school district make you feel guilty about it. DO make sure your children have good attendance for the year (and those to follow). DO be involved in their education! DO NOT regret one moment of taking them out of school for family fun! When they walk accross the graduation platform not one person will whisper "those kids missed five days in Kindergarten! They don't deserve to be valedictorians!!!!"

 

[suz72]

I am feeling stressed, just like you. My older DD will miss 10 days of 2nd grade this October, yikes!

I have talked with many people with varying opinions. Some don't miss for vacation. Some miss, but do independent study. Others miss and refuse to do independent study.

I have realized that you have to do what is right for you. We have been planning this trip for 2 years. Traveling in the summer as a family is not an option for us b/c of DHs job and b/c of $$$$$.

I have made sure that my DD has had excellent attendance this year and will make sure that she has the same (with the exception of the vacation) next year.

Not sure whether we will actually do school work while gone. Haven't decided yet.

I know that this family vacation will create memories that will last a lifetime...my children will not suffer from missing a little bit of school. Yours will not either.

 

[Bird-Mom]

I have a dd who is 4 and has special needs. Last year she went to developmental preschool in a public school. She missed 2 weeks of school for vacation, and then while we were gone, I was working on an alternate placement for her because I had some serious problems with the teacher. When we got back, the new placement had not yet been worked out, so she missed 3 more weeks of school. She didn't miss a beat when she went to the new school as far as social goes and not much academically either. The teachers encourage family time.

She is now in private school (moved to a new district that is awful, long story) and she will miss a couple weeks in Sept/Oct again. No problem. At this school, many of the children are from India, and when they go visit family, they are gone for a couple of months. There doesn't seem to be much issue when they come back.

Do not let the school district intimidate/bully you. They are often all caught up in NCLB and getting funding. When I was fighting for the alternate placement, I threatened to pull dd out until the classroom she was assigned to was full because the overlflow (new kids turning 3 and new kids moving into the district) would get sent to another school where I wanted her to be. Let me tell you, I could hear the panic in their voices as they reassured me that dd would get a new classroom, and there was no need to pull her out.

Have a great trip, ask for concepts that will be covered and work on them if you want. Cherish the family time with your sweetpeas.

 

[triplefigs]

Thank you all so much for your encouragement and advice. Just a little more info for you.

My DS not only has physical disabilities and Learning Disabilities, but he also has numerous medical issues and gets sick a lot. He has surgery several times a year. DS got very sick at the end of our trip in Dec due to too much stress on his little body. I talked to his therapists and Pediatrician about it today, and they all said December is the best for him. Also, DS is refluxing again (he had HORRIBLE GERD as a small child and was hospitalized for months at a time, was on feeding tubes, didn't eat anything orally, had to have a major surgery called a Nissen Fundoplication). Well, the Ped is sending us to the GI doc in 2 weeks cause he thinks the Fundo has loosened up. That surgery is MAJOR, MAJOR, MAJOR. DS was in the hospital for a week and 2 weeks recovery at home. It would require him to get a feeding tube again.

Also he had surgery on his foot 15 months ago for a tendon release, and it is tight again. So that is definitely one major surgery and likely 2 within this year. He already misses so much school for being sick legitimately, that DH and I are very concerned about adding 5 more days of missed school.

Also, it takes DS a LONG time to settle into any new routine and if he misses too much, it completely throws him off. So we are concerned that if he misses the 8th week of school, it may take him another 4-6 weeks to settle back into the routine and then we're in the middle of Thanksgiving and Christmas holidays.

So, we are going to keep the Sept trip as is, but we also have our Dec reservation made. We will keep listening to the advice we are given and make a final decision before we have to pay off the Sept package.

So, I would still appreciate any more advice. Thank you all.