I'm Having Problems. Help!? Update.

[tinkerbell12]

Ok.
My friend has thought once or twice about committing suicide. She's really emotional but she's never cut herself or harmed herself on purpose.
But her away message talked about suicide being a possible answer.

I IM'd her and talked to her on the phone.
She was totally serious and into it.
Before it was just a spur of the moment-oh-I-can't-stand-it.
That was in 6th grade, a while ago.

I told her that I was going to show the IM to the school counselor.
She freaked out on me, telling me how it was HER business, not mine.
She told me that I shouldn't get involved; that she could work it out herself.
She told me that it would all turn out better, she'd forget about it.

I know she won't forget about it.
Another of my friends, Katie, saw her away message. I talked to her about it and we decided that we should go to the counselor about it.
But I'm scared.
She's going to be VERY mad at me.
But I'm trying to convince myself that I could be saving her life.
But what if she doesn't want it saved? What if this is just another spur-of-the-moment thing, too?

She just left me a voicemail, begging me, pleading me, not to talk to the counselor, but I'm really, really scared.

Is it right to go to the counselor? Is it right to tell people about this? Is it right to show the counselor our IM that has all the negative stuff my friend said about herself? The IM that has comments about suicide on it?

Thanks.

 

[Damhsa04]

You should seriously talk to your councelor. Think about what might happen if you don't. You might lose a friend that you hold very close to yourself. Nobody should want to kill themselves. No matter what it's not the right answer to things.

 

[xo juicy splash]

I would tell their parents.
Your friend shouldn't get mad at your because this isn't like "I'm telling on you because you called me dumb!" This is serious. And if she didn't want anyone to know why did she put it as her away message?

 

[Axel]

As somebody who's been in your friend's position before, go talk to your counselor. I was mad as all hell when my friends took some letters of mine to a teacher, but once everything was over, I was glad they had done it. All I really needed was somebody to vent to and this teacher let me and it helped a lot. Go talk to your counselor. Your friend deserves to have somebody else know.

 

[luckystar]

Go to the school counselor I had a friend who was a cutter. Sure she was a little mad at first but she got the help she needed. She thanked me later on. It took me a couple days to go to the counselor because like you I was confused. Then I went on a school field trip for one of the clubs I was in. In the field trip, a dad who's son had committed suicide went to talk to us. He told us that if we had a friend who was suicidal or cutting themselves to help them by going to the school counselor.

 

[AmandaSparks730]

Go to the councelor ASAP. Your friend is basically shouting for help. A similar situation happened to one of my friends at the beginning of the current school year.

We know she has family problems with her dad (her parents are divorced). She had sent me emails with poems and vents that showed the whole thing. My other friend said that we needed to help her, and soon. My friend begged her not to tell anyone. But, my other friend asked me to send any emails from her that showed the problems. The (other) friend showed the emails to the school councelor. The councelor talked to the Vice Principal, who called my friend's mom. DCYF went to their house as well.

Well, my friend was ****** as **** to my other friend, but my other friend was just like "I don't care if she hates me forever. I just want her to be safe."

Please, help your friend. She needs professional help-before it's too late. Don't ignore her cries for help!

 

[::Snow_White::]

Yes, go talk to your counselor.
I've been in almost the same position as you this year.
Some of my friends talked it out and now everything is ok.
But if there is any sign of it again we are going to talk to the parents of this person.
We didn't care what this person thought we are just trying to keep everyone safe.

 

[imabrat]

She's your friend,this is your business.
God forbid you didn't go to a counselor,and she DID commit suicide,I don't think you would ever forgive yourself.
I know I wouldn't.

 

[SBubba18]

I have a story to share to you all..actually 2

Story #1.
I started having some health problems in 7th grade. I started being in and out of the hospital every couple of weeks. Then 8th grade was the same thing. When I hit 9th grade, everything god better health wise, but friends and school started going down hill. So what happened was a friend and I got into this big fight. I talked it out with other people trying to get their opinions but I couldn't take it anymore. I broke down and self harmed myself. Well, my one friend found out, and threatened to tell my parents. She black mailed me with it. I finally went to my parents and told them everything. Time passed, and all that happened is that it happened again. Now, I have not done it for over a year, and I am happy about it.

Story #2.
I have a good friend, who cuts herself, and is on drugs. Just yesterday she texted me saying that her parents are sending her somewhere to get help. In 9th grade, someone told the councler and they notified her parents. She was set up for some help, but her parents never sent her the first time because she proved to them that she would stop. The same as me, she relapsed and now she does it every chance she gets. She is getting help now and she is happy about it. The only thing I am scared about is what if it happens again..

If you do tell someone about it, she might just relapse and it might happen again, or she might not try and do it again. We never know

 

[tinkerbell12]

She's your friend,this is your business.
God forbid you didn't go to a counselor,and she DID commit suicide,I don't think you would ever forgive yourself.
I know I wouldn't.

That's a VERY good point.



Thanks so much guys, you really talked me into it.
And whoever posted the one that said "I don't care if she hates me, I just want her to be safe," that's exactly how I feel.

 

[BabyPiglet]

Trust me, you should tell someone. She might not want anyone to know now, but in the long run she'll thank you for it.

Good luck.

 

[PowerMonkey]

you should definitely go to your counselor... but more importantly, be there for her.. call up on her to check up from time to time.. make sure she knows that you care a lot about her.. that alone might help her sway away from suicide

 

[Cassidy]

Think about this...


If you would have told someone about it, she would still be alive.

But if you dont tell anyone, you will lose your friend.

IF you tell someone, you will be saving her life. She might be mad at you. But I'm telling you, ITS WORTH IT.

Would you rather have a friend mad at you? Or the friend to kill herself?

Talk to someone about it.

 

[TheAmazingSpidey]

It's better to tell and lose a friend, then to not tell, and lose a life.





...Damn, I'm good.

 

[OneTreeHill]

Telling the counselor is absolutley the right thing to do. In the end, your friend will hopefully see the good you did for her. It would help her in the long run and you could be saving her life.

 

[tinkerbell12]

OK so I went to the counselor.
We talked it out and such.

I saw her come out of the Counselor's office earlier.
She wouldn't make eye contact.

During lunch, she didn't even look in my direction.

She won't talk to me.
She won't pick up her phone.
She won't IM me.
She's doing everything in her power to block our communication off the face of this earth.

She doesn't forgive easily.
I doubt she'll forgive me in the next two months, if ever.

Is there a way to help me gain back her friendship?
Do you think she'll ever trust me again?

Honest opinions please! Thanks.

 

[crazytp93]

OK so I went to the counselor.
We talked it out and such.

I saw her come out of the Counselor's office earlier.
She wouldn't make eye contact.

During lunch, she didn't even look in my direction.

She won't talk to me.
She won't pick up her phone.
She won't IM me.
She's doing everything in her power to block our communication off the face of this earth.

She doesn't forgive easily.
I doubt she'll forgive me in the next two months, if ever.

Is there a way to help me gain back her friendship?
Do you think she'll ever trust me again?

Honest opinions please! Thanks.

Even if she may hate you, you really saved her life.

 

[Pirate Me]

Don't worry about it. You did the right thing in telling her. It'll pass.

 

[BabyPiglet]

It will pass. Just let her have some time alone. Don't bombard her with messages and IM's, etc.

 

[XxCuriosityxX<3]

OK so I went to the counselor.
We talked it out and such.

I saw her come out of the Counselor's office earlier.
She wouldn't make eye contact.

During lunch, she didn't even look in my direction.

She won't talk to me.
She won't pick up her phone.
She won't IM me.
She's doing everything in her power to block our communication off the face of this earth.

She doesn't forgive easily.
I doubt she'll forgive me in the next two months, if ever.

Is there a way to help me gain back her friendship?
Do you think she'll ever trust me again?

Honest opinions please! Thanks.

Give her time, it'll pass. She can't hold onto it forever. You did the right thing.