If your child stayed hm for college

[luvmyfam444]

Why did you make that decision? Finances? Grades? Maturity?

 

[HeatherC]

My DD just finished her first semester at a local state university. She made the decision based on the fact that she absolutely did not want to live in a dorm situation along with the practical money reasons.

She took and passed all the AP classes she could in high school and started college with 21 credits under her belt. That in itself is saving a ton of money since all her general ed. classes are out of the way. She is doing a dual major of Math and Elementary Education. Since she knows she won't be making six figures as a teacher she did not see the point of taking out tons of student loans to pay back after. She received scholarship money as well, so her entire undergraduate degree will be no more than $30,000.

She is a very practical kid. Not sure my other two will be nearly as practical....and that is ok too.

 

[PollyannaMom]

We're a couple years away from making decisions yet, but at this point, I think I would like my DS to have that transitional experience of living in a dorm between life at home and an apartment of his own. I feel like it was an important step for me. But if it doesn't work out that way, it will probably be logistical/financial concerns that sway it. He's leaning toward urban schools so far, and dorm space may be limited and expensive. (But we live close enough to the city that commuting would be a viable option.)

 

[bluezy]

We allowed our kids to make that decision. We're fortunate that we have several colleges within a 30-40 minute drive so our kids have the opportunity to commute and still get a good education at a respected college/university. We have another dozen or so schools that would be a little closer to an hour commute but many people around here do commute to those schools.

Our oldest son lived on campus for the first 2 years and then chose to transfer schools and commute from home to finish his degree. He felt there were too many distractions when living at school. He also missed his siblings when he was away. The next son never even considered living on campus. He knew it wouldn't work for him. While he's very social, he needs his own living space and would never have survived with a roommate or in a private room in a dorm. He commuted for his entire college career and told me the other day that he has never regretted that decision. Our oldest son said he enjoyed the experience of living on campus but wishes he had transferred and commuted after the first year. They each came out of school with about $30K in loans and are happy that they saved money by not living on campus.

Son #3 is currently in the college application process and while he's probably going to live on campus the first year, he hasn't ruled out commuting.

 

[phorsenuf]

 

[powellrj]

I have 3 that are either in college or have graduated. The middle one was the first to go to college. The oldest went into the army first and now is in college. He does live at his home, because since he was in the army first and married, he is considered a non-traditional student. The youngest is a sophomore in college and has always lived in the dorms. Its a small private college so the dorms are really the only choice they have.

DS #2. I could write a book on his college years. He started off living at home his freshman year so he could commute and not be tied down. 2nd semester freshman year, he moved into the fraternity house. Sophomore and Junior years he lived in what he called satellite housing for the fraternity house. Senior year he was back and forth home and the fraternity house. 5th year, he lived at home and then crashed on different couches at school. He has graduated and is back and forth from our house to his girlfriends.

It has driven me crazy for years and I tried to put a stop to it, but DH insists we let him behave like this. I think its because his parents didn't let him live at home and he swore he would never do that to his kids. The other 2 don't behave like this, but for some reason DS is content to live like this. I figured now that his friends are settled down and starting to have kids, he would too, but he has always said he never wanted to get married and I am starting to believe him.

 

[tinkerbellandeeyor]

Why did you make that decision? Finances? Grades? Maturity?

I went to my community college so I would not have to worry about taking the sat or act

 

[acebatonfan]

Because I don't want to graduate with double the debt than if I commuted from home. Tuition and fees for my university is about $12.5K per year, and room and board is about $12-16K a year (depending on dining plan and what housing you apply for). My parents and I agreed LONG before I started looking at colleges that I am responsible for tuition and room and board (if I live on campus), but they would be more than happy to let me live at home as long as I would like as long as I am working or in school.

I don't know if this would be considered immature or not, but my post-graduation plans include -hopefully- finding work locally and staying at home until I pay my loans off and have a little bit of money in emergency funds/nest eggs. By the time I graduate, I should have about $30K in student loans (I have a few scholarships and AP credits that are helping out), and I really want to move out with as little debt as possible.

 

[NewRVLady]

I remember your other thread about your DD not having good ACT score
I would really recommend Community Collge

 

[rszdtrvl]

Why did you make that decision? Finances? Grades? Maturity?

All of the above. He was a C- average in high school and there was no way I was going to go into debt with him in a 4-year college living on campus - even if he got accepted. He has Aspergers tendencies (has been tested multiple times, but never confirmed, yet never ruled out either) so is a bit immature and unorganized compared to others his age.

He is going into winter quarter at our local community college, and ending grades for fall quarter gave him a B average. He will be attending this college for at least spring 2016 quarter - more than likely the 2016-2017 year too. If his grades keep up, and he shows he could handle it mentally and emotionally, I would be thrilled if he would be able to transfer to a 4-year college.

He has things pretty good at his current community college though - he is student manager for the basketball team (wants to study sports management which is a Bachelors Degree) - and that is something that would have been nearly impossible for him to do had he gone to a larger 4-year college, being only a freshman.

 

[luvmarypoppins]

We let our 3 ds decide. Debt for room and board was a consideration for them too.

We have in less than 30 minutes from our home: (all within commuting distance)
community college main campus
3 or 4 private colleges
State University

Ds1 - chose one of the private colleges, His sat scores were not the greatest
Ds2 - chose the state univ. Had decent sats. The college has now raised their standards and I doubt he would ever get in there today
Ds3 - had to go with his backup plan - the comm. college. Applied to the state and didnt get in. Average sat's. Went to comm. college, Finished one degree while also taking some classes at the state (they have dual status in our state).
Applied again to the community college for a second degree and got into the nursing program and won a full scholarship.
Now he is applying to the state univ. for a masters in nursing program

 

[BellsFam]

Why did you make that decision? Finances? Grades? Maturity?

I chose to stay home. I was very much afraid to leave my family, but mom and dad are divorced and remarried, and because all incomes are considered in terms of FASFA, I qualified for NO assistance... all parents made too much, but had never saved for me... I chose community college for two years and worked, a week before graduation I got a great full time job, never went back to finish my 4yr degree...

My mom was awesome though, for every A grade she paid the class, so a lot of my student debt was only facilities fees and books. I paid rent so I could do what I wanted, (no curfew etc.), but mom and step-dad gave it all back to me when I moved out...

 

[luvmyfam444]

I remember your other thread about your DD not having good ACT score
I would really recommend Community Collge

Amazing how people on here remember random things

 

[HeyIt'sMe]

My DD just finished her first semester of college. She lives at home and commutes to a university which is, depending on traffic, 40-60 minutes from our home. She was the one that decided to live at home.

The reasons:
1-She got a great scholarship at this university that covers her tuition for all 4 years. She uses the 529 account we funded for her to pay for fees and textbooks. Since she plans to continue her education (she's a neuroscience major) she wants to conserve as much of her 529 account funds to use for that future schooling. She didn't want to use 529 funds to pay for room & board now.
2-Her boyfriend attends the same university and is also still living at home. They've been dating for over 3 years and she didn't want to move away.
3-She is a serious homebody and is very close to me & DH. She just wasn't interested in moving away.

Some days the commute does get to her and she says she wishes she lived on campus. But then she says she'd miss her own room...bed...bathroom...being able to go to the kitchen in the middle of the night for a snack.....the comforts of home.

 

[lvillotta1]

Even though my girls are still young I only have 6 yrs before DD#1 goes to college. We have talked at length about college and community college. We have a great colleges here in our city. I think she is leaning for a teaching degree with a major in art as she is very gifted. We even talked about scholarships today etc and living at home vs in the dorms. Ideally I would be able to pay for her college at our state school if she lived at home. She would have to pay for room and board. In this day and age I really would love to see her come out debt free. Then she would hopefully land a job that would afford her to buy a small home and get her life started and she can have an art studio in her home. My sister and I were very blessed we did not have student loan debt after a 4yr degree. I did opt to stay in the dorm for about 2years in my hometown and that was a mistake. I could not live with anyone!!! In the end I moved back home and stayed there for quite sometime for almost 7 years to save money an work as a nurse. I bought my first home 16yrs ago with over 20% down and it will be paid off in 10 years when I am 55. I think the key here is to think long term about what you really want and where you want to be. There are millions of grads who do not have jobs or not a job in their field making peanuts who are living at home and can not even pay basic bills let alone get a home. It is not the short term when discussing college plans it is really life altering.

 

[Jennasis]

I stayed home and commuted to school because that was the college that offered me a scholarship. Great school...just happened to be within driving distance.

 

[leebee]

We live in the town in which our state university is located, so DD really, REALLY didn't want to go to school at the University. She was accepted several places with some very nice merit and other scholarship money, but she knew she'd be looking at about $80K in debt over 4 years if she went to any of these schools, so she decided to go to the hometown University. We realized it wasn't her first choice but that she made a mature, responsible decision, so we let her decide where she wanted to live. I feel that having the full university experience is valuable and that living in the dorms helps with the transition to adulthood, so it was easy for us to support whatever she decided. She lived on campus for the first 3 years, then in a nearby apartment for senior year (where she paid her own rent and utilities). She graduated summa cum laude with a double major and double minor, and about $25K in debt, which is manageable (although annoying... she missed out on $16K in merit money because her guidance counselor neglected to send her transcript by the deadline...)

 

[RedAngie]

Older DD stayed home and commuted freshman year, only 20 minutes away. Then she wanted to live on campus. I was all for it, in fact I wish she'd live on campus all four years. But she saved at least 10K by living at home freshman year.

Younger DD didn't know what she wanted to do. She commuted to the local community college for a year, then took a year off. Then she decided to try living with her father in California, and enrolled in school there. But she was dropping and withdrawing from classes. She finally got her act together and is living on campus until she completes her degree.

 

[disney4us2002]

Amazing how people on here remember random things

No kidding. Or conversely, have a ton of spare time to review old posts. Don't share what you don't want thrown back at you time and time again.

We didn't want our sons to go to CC but the youngest went away and decided his social career was more important than actually going to class or reading a book so he was quite surprised when we yanked his funding after one year. Now he is home, attending the CC nearby and working weekends with very little freedom. Hopefully, lesson learned and he will get back to his away school soon. We also enjoyed not having any "kids" at home.

 

[bigbabyblues]

I stayed at home because I had to pay for college on my own and work full time at the same time. I did get a couple of grants and a student loan. I went to class from 8:00-2:30 and worked from 3-11 at a hospital.

Eta: the degree I wanted did not require going any further from home, or to a better school, either.