If you disagree with a policy change at your child's school ..

[Iforgetmypassword]

I have to say I am the extreme opposite of going along with the school, especially when it comes to my children. I believe I have final say as to what happens with my kids and take very unkindly to someone that tells me other wise. I don't understand why anyone would think someone knows what is best or could love them more than me. This particular policy isn't even about what is best for the kids but what is more convienent for the teachers. Besides we pay our taxes which pays the teachers salaries to do what we want in our schools not the other way around.

Unbelievable as it may seem, no teacher will love your child more than you will.

If you're not a chaperone, what is the point of going on the field trip?

So you can hover over them, like any good helicopter parent would.

 

[Becky2005]

What a great problem for a school to have: too many parents wanting to go on field trips.

It is hard on teachers to try and have any authority whatsoever with too many parents around. At least that's what I hear. I've never experienced that problem myself, as we were begging people to come along on our trips.

Yep....and then you have the kid over there crying because mom/dad is leaving and they want to go with them (or parents saying "I'm going to take my kid home") so now you have a big mess!!!

Even in High School sports the rule was the kids ride the BUS to the event and they come home ON the bus!

Our middle school was a little more relaxed on it but you had to sign a waiver stating you were taking your child so they could be accounted for.

I guess I'm just too old and never had my parents following us along on field trips so it never occurred to me to do so with my kids! We used to go to the zoo in 3rd grade and that was the only field trip they asked for lots of volunteers. I volunteered for that one since I knew the ratio was basically 1-2 adults for every 2-3 kids!

Now they don't even go to the zoo anymore and most field trips are gone except for walking ones to the historical center or the nearby nature center.

I do know they usually draw names for field trips here.

I'm betting someone caused an issue on one of the other trips.

 

[java]

Our school used to let whoever wanted to follow come along. I was even allowed to drive someone elses child home from Philly to NJ one trip. He was crying and they said "you take him"

Same trip different year a parent smacked someone else's child.

That was the end pf anyone coming. Now it's a "random" pick. Which is always the same 3.

 

[englishteacha]

Well, I have several students whose parents have criminal records and a few who are not to have contact with any children under age 16, including their own kid. You can bet we require a volunteer profile and background check! Parents can volunteer to chaperone an event but we have the final say whether or not that parent is "needed" on the trip.

I work with big kids, and sometimes their parents think that because they're middle schoolers the kids are able to make good decisions and don't need to be supervised. Ummm....nope. They need supervision, too. Like the time the 7th grader thought it would be a good idea to try to climb a statue in a cemetery in Boston....Mom thought it was "cute". We teachers thought it was pretty disrespectful to climb someone's tomb!

 

[ten6mom]

I am a parent and I see nothing wrong with this policy.

And just because you are a tax payer does not mean the people whose salaries you pay have to do everything you want.

 

[chicagodisneyfan]

Background check for a Chaperone (who is a parent of one of the kids going) to go on a field trip?

That is one of the biggest wastes of tax payer money I have ever heard of. I understand background checks for those who don't have kids in the school (i.e. Teachers, Teacher's Aides, etc.), that makes sense to me, but if you have a kid on the trip, you should be able to go.

I am the type of person who would probably show up, just because they said they didn't want me to, as I would wonder why they don't want me to show up and figure that they are doing something that they shouldn't be doing.

Now, factor in that this is Kindergarten and likely these kids first field trip, most parents will want to be there for that, so I think the school is way out of line here.

If they are worried about parents taking their kids elsewhere, enact a policy that if a child is missing, the police will be called immediately, no exceptions made.

Its a field trip- not graduation? I don't know anyone who follows kids on all their field trips.
Snowflake will have a good time without me!

 

[akcire]

I occasionally do a presentation at the high school for the upper level science engineering classes. I am never alone with any students. I always speak to a group of 60-90 students plus 3+ teachers. Sometimes other faculty come by, I try to make it interesting reflecting the science and current events. The school pulls a background check at least every six months. I also hold a govt security clearance, occasional consultant. The Feds always call when the school district pulls the report. Also the district only pulls state reports not multi state. I've lived all over the world. I could be a murder in Bulgaria or Florida, but since I'm good in IL I'm ok. Clearly the background check is about checking a box.

 

[Jeafl]

I totally understand the policy. When a field trip is planned, a certain number of chaperones are needed. The students are divided up and each chaperone is given x number of students to be responsible for. Chaperone is given the rules, the times to meet, etc. Students are told that the chaperone is in charge and to listen to him/her. Teacher and chaperones, in this day and age, probably have each other's cell phone numbers as well so they can be in touch as needed.

So, then you have a mom or dad show up who isn't a chaperone and that changes the dynamics of the group the mom/dad's student is in. A younger child will want to be with mom and may not listen to the chaperone any longer. Student could get whiny, want mom/dad to take him/her to another place, buy them something, take him/her to restroom now instead of at a break time, etc. Or mom/dad could decide they want to spend more time at the bear exhibit instead of moving on to the lions as planned. Then what does the chaperone do? He/she is responsible for the child on the field trip, so either the whole group waits or chaperone has to override mom/dad which could cause conflict.

There is a reason this policy was developed/changed. If you don't like it, don't let your child go on the field trip and keep them home that day. You can take them to the zoo another time.

And, yes, the school cannot keep you from going to a public place, but you can't be a part of the field trip and you shouldn't try to crash it. Think of how difficult you could make if for your child if you are there and he/she wants to be with you but can't as he/she must stay with the group/chaperone. Do you want your child to be upset or have a meltdown or create problems? I have seen it where parents would show up and "join the group, you won't notice me" and then try and take over the group or tell Suzie that she can run over to that exhibit when she was told no by the chaperone already. It can confuse the students as to who is in charge of their group or cause the group to waste time looking and waiting for a student.

There will be plenty of field trips in the future years and you will get to be a chaperone on one of them. While you may have really wanted to go on this one, you weren't selected. So accept it gracefully.

As a teacher, may I just say...

 

[ten6mom]

Snowflake will have a good time without me!

Hahaha that is hilarious! Nice!!

 

[mamacatnv]

I brought that up ... about the zoo being a public place .. he said that parents are 'being asked' not to show up and if we did it would put teachers in an uncomfortable position. So basically ...'we can't technically stop you, but ...'
He said that each grade received this letter before their scheduled field trip (one trip per year per grade, this school is K-5). Kindergarten is the last trip of the year so we are just.finding out now.

The OP stated the policy has been in effect since the beginning of the year but let each grade's parent know when it applied to them. Each grade gets one field trip per year and it is now the their turn.

Actually, she said they were just informed and does not state when the policy went into effect and that the grades were notified just prior to departure. That does not sound to me like a well advertised change in policy and that is where I as a parent would have an issue.
Like I said, its not about the circumstances, I understand that part, its about a new policy.

 

[declansdad]

Actually, she said they were just informed and does not state when the policy went into effect and that the grades were notified just prior to departure. That does not sound to me like a well advertised change in policy and that is where I as a parent would have an issue.
Like I said, its not about the circumstances, I understand that part, its about a new policy.

Notified prior to their departure...to me that means as each field trip happened throughout the year. She had no need to know it up until this point.

 

[SweetJoy]

Actually, she said they were just informed and does not state when the policy went into effect and that the grades were notified just prior to departure. That does not sound to me like a well advertised change in policy and that is where I as a parent would have an issue.
Like I said, its not about the circumstances, I understand that part, its about a new policy.

Yes, this is it exactly. I don't have a problem sending my kids on field trips without me. I'm not afraid that something awful will happen. I just wanted to know why the change .. he told me, that's that. I'll miss that little 'perk' but I'm not the type of person to make a stink over something like this. Really I was more curious if anybody ever challenges their school policy changes - of any type, not just this example. Dress code, etc for instance - it was honestly the other thread about the 8th grader with the NRA shirt that prompted this thread, it was just coincidental timing about the field trip thing.

 

[mamacatnv]

Notified prior to their departure...to me that means as each field trip happened throughout the year. She had no need to know it up until this point.

That is where I disagree. IMO when a school decides to enact a new policy, I feel it is their responsibility to inform the parents at the onset not whenever it becomes applicable.

IMO not telling the parents until just before departure says to me, they didn't want a bunch of parents whining at them all year and while I understand that, I'm still a parent and I deserve to know of policy changes when they occur not when it becomes convenient for the school to inform me.

 

[mom2rtk]

Life would be so much easier for teachers and administrators if us pesky parents would just get out of their way.

 

[tcufrog]

As the parent of a kindergartner I'm glad that background checks are required at my son's school and that some schools limit the number of parents who come.

It's not uncommon at some schools to have more than 75 Kindergartners. (3 classes of 25). Lets say half the kids have parents who want to come on the field trip. Chances are the parents don't all know each other and the teachers probably don't know all of the parents. It would be easy in that situation for an appropriately dressed and acting child molester to slip into the group. A child lagging behind thinks the person is a parent and when that adult asks him if he needs to go potty that child would think it's safe to go with that adult.

 

[Conkozan]

Our school does not allow anyone other than official chaperones attend. PLUS you do NOT chaperone your own childs group. Your child will be placed with another chaperone.

This was due to parents ignoring the others in the group and solely focusing on the wants and needs of their own child.

 

[ten6mom]

Our school does not allow anyone other than official chaperones attend. PLUS you do NOT chaperone your own childs group. Your child will be placed with another chaperone.

This was due to parents ignoring the others in the group and solely focusing on the wants and needs of their own child.

That's an interesting change. When I chaperone I always have my child in my group. It's not a bad idea actually.

 

[Mickey'snewestfan]

I am sometimes the person at my school who makes decisions, including decisions that might upset parents or teachers.

The first thing I'll say is that the other administrators at my school, and I, put a lot of thought into the decisions we make. That isn't to say that we're always right, but we are always thoughtful, and generally have the best interest of the kids in the forefront of our minds. If someone wants to come in and discuss a decision I've made, I'm happy to have that conversation. Why knows what will happen? You might listen to my reasons and come around to my side. You might convince me to look at the situation in a different way and change my mind. We might find a third solution that works for both of us. Whatever, but it starts with approach admin as if they're intelligent partners.

As to the specifics of the zoo trip, all I have to say is this: Do you have a parent in your community you'd never trust with your kid? Maybe you've heard the way he yells at his wife and it makes your skin crawl. Maybe you've found her toddler wandering in the street one time too often. Maybe you're creeped out by the way he looks at your preteen daughter. Or maybe she's come to pick up her 5 year old with alcohol on her breath many many times. For whatever reason, you've made a decision not to let him/her be alone with your kids.

Well, that neighbor's kids go to school, and their parents chaperone too. As a teacher, I can tell you that I put a lot of thought into how I group kids and chaperones on field trip. I'll take whatever steps I need to make sure that so and so isn't alone with your kids, whether it's rigging the lottery for spots on the bus, or assigning that parent to share a group with me or with my most trustworthy assistant teacher. But on a field trip where parents can come and go freely, it's a lot harder to manage. What if that parent runs into another parent group before you see them, and offers to take a couple kids to the bathroom? And that's just one example.

That isn't to say that there might not be a solution that would make you and the school happy. Maybe if parents sign up in advance, come to the school, attend the safety presentation, and then carpool behind the bus, it can work. Maybe parents can raise money and rent a second bus. If this is really really important to you then a conversation is a good place to start. On the other hand, it's totally reasonable to decide to just live with a polcy that you don't love.

 

[declansdad]

That is where I disagree. IMO when a school decides to enact a new policy, I feel it is their responsibility to inform the parents at the onset not whenever it becomes applicable.

IMO not telling the parents until just before departure says to me, they didn't want a bunch of parents whining at them all year and while I understand that, I'm still a parent and I deserve to know of policy changes when they occur not when it becomes convenient for the school to inform me.

I can see what you are saying, just don't think there was a need to say anything at the begining of the year. I would think that most schools would do that but I have no issue with the way this one did it.

 

[Aliceacc]

Myself and a few other parents are in disagreement with our kids' elementary school over a new change in policy. Basically, parents have always been welcome to 'follow the bus' and accompany any field trip, paying their own way if they weren't chosen as an official trip chaperone. We got a letter from the principal yesterday that told us that the school would no longer accomodate this practice, and if you're not an official chaperone, you're not to attend the field trip (in this case, it's a kindergarten trip to the zoo). I called the principal today to inquire further, and he basically told me that the teachers has requested this change, as they felt it was just too much to keep up with.
I thanked him for his time, said okay, and that was it. I'm not happy about it, but I figured there's nothing I can do about it. It has me wondering though (as does the thread about the 8th grader and the NRA shirt) ... what do you do when you don't like a new policy instituted by your child's school? Just get used to it, make an issue, try to change it ...?

Here's the problem:
Just because you're the parent of a child, doesn't make you a sterling citizen.

I used to have a friend. His wife (Now ex) and I were very close friends, my kids played with his son.

A few years ago, after they moved cross country, he was arrested on charges of sexual abuse of a 12 year old girl.

HE would have been one of the parents on somebody's field trip.

School employees are screened. Parents are not. It's not safe for YOUR child to have other parents there. If anything, they're more dangerous than strangers, because of the automatic acceptance that goes along with being Joey's dad.

Those policies exist for a reason: to keep your kids safe. And if the policy was enacted mid year, I imagine there's a very good reason for it, probably one they're not allowed to share. Perhaps someone's parent has been arrested on abuse charges and is out on bail, perhaps there's a custody dispute and they're concerned that the non-custodial parent will snatch the child, perhaps a million other things they're not at liberty to share.

If you trust these people to care for and educate your children, I would think they would get the benefit of the doubt when it comes to a decision that effects your child's safety.