I need advice!

[bookgirl2632]

A friend of mine recently suggested a trip to Universal this fall. We are both big Harry Potter fans and would really like to see the Wizarding World. It was sort of an offhanded suggestion and nothing was decided or set in stone.

Come to find out that my mother was planning a trip for the fall as well. It was meant to be a surprise for me for my birthday. She was going to tell me well prior to it, but she was going to book it and then tell me.

I feel horrible and I'm not quite sure how to tell my friend about this development. I really can't afford to go twice. I thought about inviting her along, but I don't want to make it seem like she's an afterthought. Besides, she can only afford to go for three days and we are planning a five day trip.

I know that I need to just break the news to her, but I just hate to do it. I know she'll be disappointed. Maybe we can plan a trip together in the spring.

What to do, what to do?!

 

[derekburgan]

Why not just pitch to your friend that you told your family about your plans, and they thought it would make a great family trip as well. There's nothing wrong with your friend not staying the full five days. Tell your friend how excited everyone is that you'll all be together and work with her on lining up things you can do while she is there. Maybe tell her you want to do one special thing with just her (ie: Blue Man Group, a dinner at Margaritaville, etc).

Make it seem like it's something everyone wants and not like she's a third wheel.

 

[Metro West]

I know that I need to just break the news to her, but I just hate to do it. I know she'll be disappointed. Maybe we can plan a trip together in the spring.

What to do, what to do?!

I think you should just tell her what's happened and start to plan a trip in the spring. If she's a real friend, she'll understand your position.

 

[A Mickeyfan]

If your family was planning a trip as a surprise for your birthday, they are making you pay? I may be in the minority here but I would tell my family that I already had plans. If they're making you pay for your trip, it should be up to you when you are going. If they were paying for you, then that is different too.... I'd bow out from my family and go with my friend.. Paying for your own, unplanned by you, birthday surprise trip is not a nice surprise to me... again, I may be in the minority here.

 

[bookgirl2632]

I won't be paying for my portion of the trip, but I still need to pay for certain expenses. I certainly wouldn't expect for my meals and shopping to be paid for. But then, this isn't really the issue.

 

[Magpie]

Okay, since this trip is a birthday present for you, and since you won't be paying for it, then I think you should just explain the situation to your friend. "My family's kidnapping me and taking me to Orlando!"

I'm sure she'll understand - my friends would. Especially considering you guys had no firm plans to go together.

Bring her back some wonderful souvenirs, and make plans to do something together another time.

Good luck!

P.S. As far as inviting her to come along... gauge that one by her reaction. If she seems really disappointed, then make the offer. I don't think she'll consider herself an "afterthought" - after all, you ARE inviting her along on your birthday trip! And presumably that's because you like spending time with her.

 

[momblanch]

I would just be totally honest w/your friend. Talk to her about your family's plan and offer her the choice to travel in the fall w/you and your family, or plan a trip together in the spring.