'I love you, but I am not IN love with you!' - update Nov 18th post #92

[Mrs Dazzle]

Hope the funeral goes well for you on Thursday, and good luck with the chat with your DH, say what needs to be said

 

[Claire L]

Has this come out of the blue to you ,or has his mood changed towards you recently?

Relationships are odd things and i think we can all be a bit bored with work/eat/sleep cycle etc and get in a rut, but thats just how regular life is, not everyday can be exciting. I hope you are ok

His mood has become more distant over the past 6 months or so He said he has been wanting to tell me for a while but kept putting it off and it was me that actually asked the question that set all of this off! But at least it is now out in the open and I hope we can work through it

Claire

 

[Ware Bears]

for you, Claire.

 

[Booknut]

So sorry about your Nan and I will pray for you both to work through this and come out stronger and happier

 

[TotallyAngelic]

Sorry to hear about your relationship issues and your Nan Claire - sending
I hope the time away will make your DH realise what is important to him and you will be able to work things out (if thats what you want). All relationships get into a rut from time to time and you just need to talk it through, decide if you both want to continue and if so decide what changes you need to make to make things work. Relationships do change with time and not many keep the excitement of a new relationship, and your DH should be able to accept that.

 

[Lizzy Lemon]

Wanted to add my condolences for the loss of your Nan. Hope the talk goes well, at least its out in the open, you can't work on problems if you don't know about them. We've been going through tough times mainly due to our boys health problems, its just worn me out and DH doesn't really understand my devotion to them, I don't understand his lack of devotion to them! When we are together just the 2 of us things seem brilliant but things are getting easier as our boys get older and more capable of looking after themselves. I hope that things work out for you two also. Take care.

 

[UKDEB]

Just catching up, Claire. So sorry to hear all this - life must seem very tough at the moment. I hope tomorrow isn't too stressful.

 

[Snowy-girls]

Thinking of you today Claire .x.

 

[tennisfan]

Thinking of you today, hope it goes as well as expected

 

[Kirsteen]

Thinking of you today Claire

 

[CustardTart]

I've only just logged on and caught up with your sad news, Claire. I really hope today isn't too traumatic, hun - you have such a lot on your plate at the moment...

I don't have any useful advice I'm afraid - keeping my fingers crossed this is one of those relationship blips and you and your DH can sort things out...

 

[Claire L]

Well the funeral went ok

Had a chat to DH again and he says at the moment it is still raw so staying at his Mum's for a bit longer.

Claire

 

[PoppyAnna]

Well the funeral went ok


Had a chat to DH again and he says at the moment it is still raw so staying at his Mum's for a bit longer.

Claire

Been thinking of you today Claire.
Not sure what else to say, I guess it's a all about waiting to see what happens.

Best wishes.x

 

[mandymouse]

Thinking of you and your family Claire

 

[wicket2005]

Just sending you more Claire and thinking about you.

 

[scojos]

just wanted to send my best wishes, thoughts, hugs dust etc.
dh and i went through a very very rough patch last summer, worst time of my life, we have small kids and in the end their happiness had to come first, so we decided to stay togther. luckily it has worked out, and we both make more effort than we did.
whatever happens- you seem very strong, and you will do what works for you. you are at home with "your" things, it must be awful for him to be away, even if it was his choice to leave.
maybe developing a shared hobby like dancing once a week to spend some time together? hope whatever happens, you find happiness.
Tracy

 

[Beep]

Hey,

Really sorry you are having such a bad time of it, and condolences with your Nan.

I split with my husband about 15 years ago - I told him that I loved him but wasn't in love with him. It was one of the hardest things to go through and believe me, it was just as hard for me to say it as it was for him to hear it.

Unfortunately we were just too different and I did love him and care for him but felt there was something missing. We had things in common but they were 'outside' things. We ran martial art clubs and were both instructors, and our life consisted of working and doing martial arts 6 times a week.

I was extrovert and he was introvert. I didn't think I could change him, or want to, just his outlook on life but I couldn't. I was ever the optomist and he was a pessimist. What I considered fun he considered childish and silly.

We decided the best thing for us was to go our separate ways, but we sat down and talked everything through before we decided that. It could have easily gone the other way once we analysed what and where it had gone wrong but for us that wouldn't have been right.

I really hope things work out for you. Whatever happens and whatever you decide between you and wish you all the best x

 

[Claire L]

Well update is that DH is probably going to rent somewhere for 6 months and we are going for a full speration to see how things work for both of us!

On the plus side still going to New York in December as 'friends'

Claire

 

[UKDEB]

So sorry to hear that, Claire - I'm sure it's not what you wanted. You're putting on a very brave face, but you must be feeling very vulnerable right now. Use all the support you can get.

 

[mandymouse]

So sorry to hear your news Claire, sending you lots of hugs