I got that dreaded phone call yesterday!

[AshleyW]

I'm so sorry. That must be a hard thing to go through. I always make sure EVERYONE in my car is buckled up when I'm driving. I lost a friend of mine during our senior year of high school because she wasn't wearing a seat belt. Her friend was driving, and my friend and another girl were in the backseat sleeping with no seat belts on. The driver swerved to miss a deer, flipped the SUV and my friend was thrown from the car.

I'm glad that you're son is okay, and hopefully his friend will be okay, too.

 

[dislaney]

 

[disney1990]

I am so sorry to hear this. About a year ago, the son of a friend of ours had an accident and was not wearing a seat belt. He was seriously hurt in the accident.

The Mom just couldn't believe that, after all the seat belt talks that they had had, that he would be driving without one. But, kids just don't see this "happening to them".

Parents keep preaching about seat belts, talking on the cell phone and texting to your children.

 

[iwrbnd]

Thank you everybody! I've been in a trance all day. I finally talked to the other boys mom. He has a broken hand, rib and bruised lung. He may be released from the hospital today. I am relieved he wasn't hurt worse! We all feel so bad. I told my son his car in not to go into drive until everyone has their seatbelt on. Well, I guess I was talking in another language because he obviously didn't do it. The thing is, I've seen this other boy not wear a seat belt in my son's car. I talked to my son and to this boy multiple times about it. We even banned him from my son's car for 3 months because of this and being wild and distracting in the car. I even called his mom at one point to tell her he wasn't wearing his seatbelt and remind her my son is a new driver. This mom was telling the boy, too. Unfortunately, talking to a teenager is sometimes like talking to a wall!

My first concern is obviously with the health of these boys but I have been wondering about liability. Everyone is friends but I know that can turn. What kind of phone call do I need to make to protect myself? Somebody was mentioning that today.

I can say from now on my son (When he gets to drive again at age 35!) will only be allowed one other person in the car. I wish I had enforced that rule earlier. Just about a month ago I thought about doing that and then remembered my high school years and how much fun I had driving my friends around. It's so hard knowing how much to protect and how much independence to have! Parenting teens is the hardest thing I've ever had to do!

 

[momrek06]

Oh, sweetie, please keep us updated.

 

[ols386]

So sorry that this happened.

Hope everything will turn out ok for your son, and I hope and pray that the one boy will recover quickly.

 

[iwrbnd]

I'm not thinking straight and double posted!

 

[Mrs. Charming]

OMG!!

 

[kymmyk13]

My Dd19 flipped her car last year it is very scary. I am going to send you a PM

 

[TeresaNJ]

I'm so sorry you are going through this, and hopefully everyone will be okay. It will be ten years this May that my then 20 yo son and his best friend were in a car accident. They went to the local 24 hr store at around 1am to buy magazines and snacks, and the friend, who was driving, ran a red light and hit another car carrying a few young women. The air bags activated, my son had a momentary loss of consciousness, then was led out of the car by nearby neighbors. His friend also got out of the car, but couldn't walk due to a leg injury. The police arrived, flares were set out, but another car came flying down the road and hit my son's friend, who was thrown, and his neck was broken. The paramedics intubated him to try to keep him alive long enough for his parents to say goodbye. He was taken off life support in the morning. My son has never gotten over seeing his best friend killed, and has a lot of survivor's guilt. Hugs and prayers to you and your family.

 

[iwrbnd]

Thank you again, everybody! I can feel your support even through the computer screen!

 

[hegsag]

Big hugs!!! Hope the boy recovers quickly...

 

[Tinkmom75]

Thank you everybody! I'm still just in shock about this! I talked to the other boy's mom and he is going to be okay! He has a broken hand, rib and bruised lung and may go home from the hospital today. I feel so bad and responsible. I told my son his car should never go into drive until everyone is buckled. I knew this boy didn't always wear it and talked to him about it many times. I even talked to his mom about it and remind her my son is a new driver so she was reminding him too! We even then banned this boy from the car for 3 months because of the seatbelt thing and he was wild in the car and distracting. I feel like we can talk until we are blue in the face but teens don't always listen to our instructions.

I'm mostly concerned about the children's health and safety but I have thought about liability, too. Some of you mentioned making a phone call to a lawyer. What do I need to do?

Just the other day I was thinking about telling my son he can only have 1 other child in the car. But then I remembered all the fun I had driving my friends around as a teen. It's so hard to know how much to protect and how much independence to allow! Parenting teens is the hardest thing I've ever had to do!

From now on if he ever drives again (like age 35!) there will be a limit of one kid in the car!

What a horrible situation. I know it could have been much worse but it's still so hard!

I'm glad your son is OK and I hope the other boy recovers quickly.

I have a new driver. The driver's education teacher stressed not letting them drive/ride with other students in the car for the first 6 months after receiving their license and driving on their own. I have had this rule with my DD and have been ridiculed by her and her friend. I just said my concern is for my DD and not what anyone else thinks. She has tried to get me to let her drive with other kids several times and I said no, not till August. Perhaps I should make it longer.

I also remember the fun I had along with the wild and stupid things I did while driving with other teenagers in the car.

 

[MIGrandma]

Please don't beat yourself up over this. I'm sure your son feels some guilt as well, since he was driving, but it was an accident. I'm glad he is okay, and hope the boy not wearing his seatbelt will be as well. It's hard, as a parent, to let our teen children drive. My own son was in a couple accidents himself when he was a teen. Thankfully he was by himself each time, and wasn't hurt. It's hard though. Hopefully your son will always remember to put his seatbelt on and realize that an accident can happen in a split second so will have learned from this.

 

[SC Minnie]

I'm glad your son is OK and I hope the other boy recovers quickly.

I have a new driver. The driver's education teacher stressed not letting them drive/ride with other students in the car for the first 6 months after receiving their license and driving on their own. I have had this rule with my DD and have been ridiculed by her and her friend. I just said my concern is for my DD and not what anyone else thinks. She has tried to get me to let her drive with other kids several times and I said no, not till August. Perhaps I should make it longer.

I also remember the fun I had along with the wild and stupid things I did while driving with other teenagers in the car.

I have a new driver too and the no friends in the car for 6 months is the rule for our house too. Then after that only 1 friend at the time for 6 months. She of course thinks its unreasonable but I really don't care.


OP-- I hope the boy fully recovers and they all learn a hard lesson from this.

 

[Tinkmom75]

I have a new driver too and the no friends in the car for 6 months is the rule for our house too. Then after that only 1 friend at the time for 6 months. She of course thinks its unreasonable but I really don't care.


OP-- I hope the boy fully recovers and they all learn a hard lesson from this.

I like the only 1 friend for 6 months after the first 6 months. I may use that. Thanks for posting that

 

[Tuffcookie]

TC

 

[iwrbnd]

We had a 1 friend rule for 6 months. I wish I had kept it longer now that he wrecked yesterday! He'll be 17 next month so almost made it a year. I'm going to make the no friend rule or 1 friend rule last even longer for my other children. I've lived and learned! There's nothing worse than getting to a crash scene with 4 injured teens and knowing your son was the one driving! Thanks again for everyone's stories and support! It helps more than you can imagine!

 

[lillygator]

he was life flighted? seems unusual for those injuries. That will be a heft bill I am sure.

Glad to hear everyone is ok and best of luck to you OP.

 

[iwrbnd]

I'm so sorry you are going through this, and hopefully everyone will be okay. It will be ten years this May that my then 20 yo son and his best friend were in a car accident. They went to the local 24 hr store at around 1am to buy magazines and snacks, and the friend, who was driving, ran a red light and hit another car carrying a few young women. The air bags activated, my son had a momentary loss of consciousness, then was led out of the car by nearby neighbors. His friend also got out of the car, but couldn't walk due to a leg injury. The police arrived, flares were set out, but another car came flying down the road and hit my son's friend, who was thrown, and his neck was broken. The paramedics intubated him to try to keep him alive long enough for his parents to say goodbye. He was taken off life support in the morning. My son has never gotten over seeing his best friend killed, and has a lot of survivor's guilt. Hugs and prayers to you and your family.

I'm so sorry you and your son went through that! Thank you for sharing. It helps me to know I'm not alone and it could have been much worse. Again, I'm sorry for what you went through!