I am so angry right now

[ScarlettO]

Originally posted by GreenEyes0205

A friend of mine couldn't afford the package prices. So when she got the proofs, she took them to a photo store. They were able to take out the word "Proof" that is written on it & copied them. The pictures came out beautiful!! And it cost under $50 to do. We put them side by side of my son's school pictures & the difference was only slight. My other son graduates next year & I am planning on doing what my friend did.

I hope her father comes through with his promise, poor kid. Good luck!!!!

This is a fabulous idea! Our proofs had no words on them, and the photo shops(even Wallmart has a copier) can do wonders! And I ended up with too many photos, the most important to the kids were the very small ones that they exchanged and sent in the announcements.

 

[floridaminnie]

Originally posted by Serena
I just don't know what to do or say to my daughter when he does this kind of stuff. How do I explain it?

Give her a hug and tell her that you love her and that YOU will always be there for her. Maybe talk together (her and you) and come up with some type of plan that both you and her can live with about the pictures. She's old enough to understand what her father did and that this probably isn't the first time he's done something like this nor will it be the last. She knows what type of person he is.

 

[Serena]

That's an idea. I'll see what kind of proofs we get.

 

[Serena]

Originally posted by floridaminnie
Give her a hug and tell her that you love her and that YOU will always be there for her. Maybe talk together (her and you) and come up with some type of plan that both you and her can live with about the pictures. She's old enough to understand what her father did and that this probably isn't the first time he's done something like this nor will it be the last. She knows what type of person he is.

Yes, she does by now. I will see her tonight. We're picking out her clothes for the pictures.

I told her I'd talk with her tonight.

 

[jipsy]

Serena, my BF's father did this to him and his sister their entire life. He spent all his money on the women he was cheating with and their children, up until the day he died last summer. After he died, the will gave everything he owned to his new wife of only four years and left his own flesh and blood kids with nothing.

Some men just don't get it. (((hugs))) to you.

 

[dianeschlicht]

Originally posted by GreenEyes0205
A friend of mine couldn't afford the package prices. So when she got the proofs, she took them to a photo store. They were able to take out the word "Proof" that is written on it & copied them. The pictures came out beautiful!! And it cost under $50 to do. We put them side by side of my son's school pictures & the difference was only slight. My other son graduates next year & I am planning on doing what my friend did.

Please DO NOT do as GreenEyes suggests! It is illegal, and can cost you a whole lot more than a picture package if you get caught. Also, that copy place can be fined thousands of dollars for doing that!

I think your EX sounds like a jerk who cares nothing about his child. Let your daughter know you love her, and that you will do what you can to get her picture package. I would only give him one small picture back, and be glad you are getting rid of this jerk!

 

[ScarlettO]

There is a MACHINE at Wallmart where you can do it yourself. I've copied those expesive WDW pics that they take in front of Cinderella's Castle...they are copyrighted, but I neede a copy to send relatives, so I copied it. Now a person at a picture place would not do it, but you can do it yourself at a machine.

 

[bjgrazi]

Laurie, I understand your anger completley. I sent you a PM.

Just remember it will all come back to him 10 fold in the end.

 

[4greatboys]

Originally posted by Serena
I just don't know what to do or say to my daughter when he does this kind of stuff. How do I explain it?

When my x does stuff like that I just tell the kids honestly whats going on. You dont have to say "your dad is a no good #%*$" but its okay to be honest with her and say he is not going to pay for the pictures and is giving $60 and that you will help her all you can. Believe me if she is that old she already knows how he is. Now that my 2 oldest are teens they see lots of things I dont have to tell them. Actually my oldest wont even speak to his dad now--its been atleast 6 months and his dad was in the wrong. Told my ds he didnt care if he ever came back over to visit him and was planning on taking my 14 yr old to Austin last Thanksgiving and didnt want him to say anything to my oldest because then the oldest might have wanted to go Its just very sad the way some parents act after a divorce--they dont realize you dont divorce the kids or their financial responsibilities

 

[Keli]

Serena,
Please don't take the poster's advice about copying the proofs illegally. That might not even be possible depending on who took them because some places give very low resolution pics as the proofs for this very reason (they don't look nearly as good as the real pics will and the copies look even worse than the proof) but whether it's possible or not it isn't a good idea. I know you aren't thinking about it this way but the photographer deserves to be paid for their work and this is just a way of cheating them. Unless you go to a photographer that will give you the rights to your pics. They usually charge a lot more up front but then you can have all the copies you want made from those pics. It might be a better way for you to go.

When Ashli had her senior pics taken last year she hated them. I thought she looked really cute that day but either I was blind or she really did have the dark circles under her eyes that showed up in nearly every pic. So we had my SIL get her camera out and take Ashli's pic outside in various places around town (a college campus usually makes beautiful backgrounds if you can do it on a Sunday afternoon when there's not so many people out walking around). Ashli loved these pics, they cost me nothing but film, developing, and the cost of having copies printed (mostly in wallet size).

 

[MickeysMommy]

to you both.

 

[holycow]

So sad!...(((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))) to you and your DD.


Lisa

 

[Pete's Mom]

To be honest, I would stay out of it and let your daughter handle this direct with her dad especially since she is old enough. I think she can make more progress with him than you at this point. It makes it much easier for him if you are the bearer of bad news.

My son is 7 and when he or his dad (my ex) do something that makes each other mad and then come whining to me about it I tell them, "this is between you guys, you need to work it out". I got tired of them both using me as a buffer, especially when my ex started putting the blame on me and expecting me to fix everything. Now, if Pete says, "I don't want to go to daddy's house this weekend, will you call him and tell him?", I say "no, you call him and tell him". When his dad says, "Pete says he doesn't have fun at my house and wants to stay with you, that's unfair, how can you let this happen?", I say "look, this is between you and Pete, work it out, I don't want to hear it, I am staying out of it". It has forced them to really work things out instead of me running interference and putting a band aid over it.

Keli had a great idea about taking some candid shots. $ 200.00 for pictures is way to high in my opinion. I really feel bad for the seniors who cannot afford it. Why these companies charge such outrageous prices is beyond me.

 

[Serena]

Pete's mom, he did talk to her on the phone. He told her he wasn't taking her and what he was willing to put out for them.

This situation is nothing new. He'll do what he wants, and then I'll do what I can to make it right. Same story, different day.

And about taking the pics to walmart. I was pretty sure it was illegal to copy them. But I didn't know walmarts policies. I was willing to check.
I'll get what pictures I can. That's all I can do. And after all, they are just pictures.

 

[wishuponastarforever]

and to you and DD.

 

[MICKEY88]

I agree with the other people who advised against copying the proofs..it is very illegal and unethical.... any store or business caught doing so could be sued by the photographer,

 

[MICKEY88]

I agree with the other people who advised against copying the proofs..it is very illegal and unethical.... any store or business caught doing so could be sued by the photographer,

 

[Toby'sFriend]

Hey Serena

I know when I was a Senior in High School the high price of the "official" photographer was difficult for many families. We bought the cheapest package possible and then a bunch of us hired a person from the local Community College photography classes to meet us at the park one day and take portraits.

It was alot cheaper because the guy was able to use some of the stuff in a portfolio he was trying to build so he could open his own studio in the near future. In fact, we bragged for months about being models. :lol: We were also able to do some group shots of friends -- which I still have today.

Even if you just know somebody with a decent 35mm camera, you can really come up with some nice portraits on your own using the commercial printing studios.

 

[Serena]

TF, you know, that's an idea. Actually she has been a model for kids in the photography class at school before. I wonder if one of them was still doing it.
It's an option anyway. I'll see, I don't know how much the pictures will be, but I'll see that she gets some good pictures. I'll find out a lot more when I get to the studio, and they have a website I will check too.
thank you all, you make me feel so much better.

 

[Blondie]

I'm sorry you are having to deal with this Laurie.