I am so angry right now

[Serena]

My daughter is a senior and since I am paying for her senior ring, graduation stuff and everything else, she talked with her dad about paying for pictures.
He said sure, asked about how much it would be and told her he would set it aside. This was 2 months ago. Aprox. $200.


Now to tonight, not only does he tell her he won't take her to get them done after all, but he tells her he can only spend about $60 and really doesn't see the need for pictures at all.

Now, this attitude is nothing new to me. What really hurts my daughter and really makes me angry is that he bought his gf's kids a $2,500 4-wheeler, and his gf hinted that he also helped to buy a horse for her, a woman that already has 52 of them.

You know, breaking promises to me, hurt. But when he does it to his own kids, it really ticks me off.

 

[grinningghost]

Oooh, that would make my blood boil too.

 

[Costumesaremylife]

That really stinks. I am very sorry about this. I have no words of wisdom, just hope that it works out.

 

[Serena]

What's really ironic is that he was here and we were discussing the terms of the divorce.

 

[MosMom]

I'm very sorry that he has done this to her. If I were you, I would say something about it and remind him that his biological children still need him.

 

[lilboo]

52 horses??? Please tell me they run their own stables...

I'm so sorry about the pictures for your daughter...can she still get a decent package with $60? Or maybe use that as a deposit and get the rest from Dad in installments?

 

[Serena]

Oh, but see, it's his money as he sees fit. And he didn't say he wouldn't buy them, just that he didn't see the need for so many.
Or that's his reasoning.
We've had this conversation many times. And especially when it comes to her. He can be a good man in so many ways, but this is one area that we never could agree on and caused a lot of our problems. Telling him he's a ******* for the way he treats her was just part of it.

 

[Stepharoonie!]

I know exactly what you're going through Serena...chin up....it will get better!!

 

[Serena]

What will happen is that he will pay his $60 and I will pay some for whatever other pictures I can afford. Probably not much, but I will get my favorite at least.

 

[Serena]

Lilboo, his gf does raise and breed horses. And everything else. She has a farm with all kinds of animals.

 

[C.Ann]

What a JERK !!!

 

[DocRafiki]

Originally posted by Serena
What really hurts my daughter and really makes me angry is that he bought his gf's kids a $2,500 4-wheeler, and his gf hinted that he also helped to buy a horse for her, a woman that already has 52 of them.

What a cretin!!!

Let's see... memories to last a lifetime... of your OWN DAUGHTER... or... yeah, I'd go with the 4-wheeler too

 

[lilboo]

Originally posted by Serena
Lilboo, his gf does raise and breed horses.

I had a feeling it had to be something like that.

Still, horses aren't cheap and with 52(!!!) of them he thinks the $200 graduation pic package is excessive.

Good luck.

 

[KimRaye]

Originally posted by Serena
Lilboo, his gf does raise and breed horses. And everything else. She has a farm with all kinds of animals.

AND that 'lucky' gf has your soon-to-be ex-husband. Kinda like payback, isn't it?

 

[olena]

Oh I'd be furious!

Why not ask if his GF can adopt your daughter, so the purchase will be justified in his eyes?

 

[Val]

Just remind yourself that he will get what he deserves....my dad divorced my mom when I was 11....I was in the middle of 10 kids of a "blended" family. My maternal grand parents unselfishly raised the kids that were "out-of-wedlock" from both my mom and my dad. My dad refused to pay for anything for any of us- school, college, weddings, nothing. He had 7 wives and died suddenly and VERY rich. Each of us kids DID inherit some money- not a lot, but enough for a down payment of our house! BUT- only my youngest sister and I showed up at his funeral. None of the other 8 kids would even come. They said that he never cared about us, so why should they care about him. I am still not sure (its been 9 years) that they were correct- but it is very telling. I do not miss my father- but I miss that he missed out on knowing his 4 lovely grandchildren- my kids. It's too bad he missed out on our accomplishments- none of which he was responsible for (other than that genetic contribution).

My advice: Don't be bitter- get the best "revenge". Have your daughter be a success in life in spite of what her father does. No one can take away her success. Don't let her (or you) live with bitterness- live a ful life. That is the sweetest revenge of all.

 

[GreenEyes0205]

What a jerk! Senior pictures are very important. Is the school making you pay the money up front before the pictures are taken?

A friend of mine couldn't afford the package prices. So when she got the proofs, she took them to a photo store. They were able to take out the word "Proof" that is written on it & copied them. The pictures came out beautiful!! And it cost under $50 to do. We put them side by side of my son's school pictures & the difference was only slight. My other son graduates next year & I am planning on doing what my friend did.

I hope her father comes through with his promise, poor kid. Good luck!!!!

 

[Serena]

Thanks for listening, again. It helps.

 

[4greatboys]

Im so sorry he is acting like a jerk. If its any comfort my x does that a lot. When we split it up my 2 oldest were fairly young, 6 and 4. I asked him at Christmas time if he could chip in some "Santa" money. He said no, if the kids got something he wanted them to know it was from HIM. They didnt think the santa stuff came from me so I wasnt getting his glory. So at Christmas time he gave them 1 thing each. 1 thing--he had plenty of money. His grandfather had given him $1000 and my x didnt know he told me that Anytime either of them ask him for something he says he doesnt have the money but turns around and buys himself whatever he wants.
My dh has really stepped up to the plate with my 2 oldest and supports them far more than their own dad does.

 

[Serena]

I just don't know what to do or say to my daughter when he does this kind of stuff. How do I explain it?