I am Petrified to Fly, but...

[dirkus]

I am all for flying (heck, I'm a licensed pilot) and the safety statistics are just as others have pointed out -- you are safer flying than driving, but...

If you are looking just at the money, will you need to rent a car when you get there if you fly? If so, driving may still be cheaper.

 

[zzammmi]

Xanex or any of the medications in the Benzodiazepenes (spelling?) family can be helpful in taking the edge off the fear as does many of the suggestions listed. Alcohol is experienced by the brain in basically the same way however; so much in fact that I would steer you away from it if you are in recovery from alcoholism. If a history of substance addicition is not a factor however, a couple of doses shouldn't be a problem. On the other hand, you could consider connecting with a therapist who specializes in the treatment of phobias if you genuinely wish to overcome this fear. In most cases this is a short term kind of treatment that will teach you to relax while gradually exposing you to progressively more real situations. This is a highly effective and focused form of treatment that does not involve delving into your psyche much. Good luck!

 

[bugsy]

Xanex or any of the medications in the Benzodiazepenes (spelling?) family can be helpful in taking the edge off the fear as does many of the suggestions listed. Alcohol is experienced by the brain in basically the same way however; so much in fact that I would steer you away from it if you are in recovery from alcoholism. If a history of substance addicition is not a factor however, a couple of doses shouldn't be a problem. On the other hand, you could consider connecting with a therapist who specializes in the treatment of phobias if you genuinely wish to overcome this fear. In most cases this is a short term kind of treatment that will teach you to relax while gradually exposing you to progressively more real situations. This is a highly effective and focused form of treatment that does not involve delving into your psyche much. Good luck!

therapist, shmarapist, bring on the xanax

 

[dreams91]

Honestly I would stay as far away from sedatives and drugs as you can.

One, because if you make it through the first flight without medication then all subsequent flights will be that much easier. You'll say to yourself, "Hey! I did it once without sedatives I can do it again!"

And two, it's a cheap way to get over a fear. You can't overcome anything unless you face it head on. A lot of people use drugs for things like this and they are fine with that, but think how much more confidence you will have if you overcome this without medication.

Lastly why do you think airports have bars? My sister is petrified of flying as well, or rather she was. The first time she flew I had to pry the Xanax from her hands, but after a shot at the bar she was significantly relaxed. It was a better and safer option than drugs and it made the flight just as easy for her had she taken something. There is less chance of an allergic reaction that way if you have never taken something like Xanax before.

Try to distract yourself with little facts as well. One good thing is to learn facts about the mechanics of airplanes. On our liftoft I distracted her with a running comentary of slat deployment and their function on airplanes. The rest of the way until she fell asleep I talked about the jet engines and wing designs. She was utterly fascinated and too busy trying to figure out how things worked to let her fear conquer her. (And mind you she is very prone to anxiety attacks normally!)

There are two steps that are key in conquering a fear. One facing it head on like you are planning to. And two, understanding what it is that you are afraid of. I had the same problem with sharks. When I was younger I was in the water during a shark attack, less than 8 feet away from the person attacked. I was terrified of all water but after studying sharks have learned enough about them to feel comfortable with the precautions I do take when in water. Then I faced them head on and I now make it a point to swim with them at least once every other year. Now thats a bit different than flying, but I went through the same anxiety. I got into the water and wow was my heart pounding. My breathing was very erratic when the first shark swam under me and it took me awhile to get it under control. But once I had I started distracting myself with facts. Like how they use their lateral line system to sense their surroundings and their dorsal fins to manuever. Now I understand planes are very different from sharks but the same concept applies. If you understand how the object of your fear works you'll calm down. The take off wont be pleasant, but I assure you that you can handle it.

Bring reading material as well. That helps a lot, or a portable DVD player as someone else already suggested. I'd say try to sleep, but when you are trying to fall asleep your mind wanders and thats not good when your afraid of something at that present moment. Stick with distractions.

Plus a little shot of Jose can go a long way in calming those nerves to. Best of luck with it! Feel free to PM me if you need any plane facts to distract yourself with.

I would like to politely disagree with you. I conquered my fear "head on" and everytime I fly, I still get to the state of an almost panic. You can not pry my fingers from the hand rests. I personally belive that Xanax is the PERFECT way to fly. It puts me at ease. I don't feel I need it in everyday life, but to fly, it definitely takes away the physical reactions I have to flying.

 

[bugsy]

honestly, when DH and I got together 10 years ago, he had only
flown twice in his life, always preferred to drive due to FOF. Then I came
along, a travel junkie, who's motto is "anywhere I want to go pretty much
requires a passport and a R/T air ticket". I convinced him to take a trip with
me to China, he doc prescribed xanax, he did famously (loved the trip too,
BTW) He still does not "enjoy" or "look forward to" flying, by any stretch of
the imagination, but I can tell you over the years his DH world
has expanded tenfold. Keep in mind, anything in moderation is fine, excess
can lead to problems, that is, unless you are speaking of excessive Disney
trips! (Is there any such thing? ) p.s. also I believe
anywhere you really want to go, is certainly worth getting there faster,
and without travel burn-out

 

[wifeofjack]

I am going thru the same anxiety that you are. Hubby and I want to go in September and if the price of gas keeps climbing it would be much cheaper to fly, given the recent prices from Southwest. I flew years ago and did not enjoy it at all. He has no fear, but I do. Our daughter flew down a few years ago and had a prescription from the doctor and said it was fine. I am waiting to firm up or plans, gas prices, airline prices, etc. will play a major role in our decision. But 3 hours on a plane instead of 22 hours and 2 days on the road is beginning to sound better every day.
By the way, I too am from Naugatuck. I sent you a p.m., respond if you want. It truly is a Small World after all.

 

[Luckymommyx2]

I have to also recommend fearofflying.com. I'm not fearful of flying but I do not like take-offs (landing I'm okay with) and I do not like any turbulance. I went on the site and it did a really nice job of explaining sounds you hear, reasons behind movement and how things work. Try to find some time to devote to it and I think it will help a lot.
I say go for it and fly...definitely safer than driving. I drive 95 several times a week and it petrifies me so I can't imagine what it would be like driving for 20 hours on it!!! As others have mentioned as well, time is a big factor. I can be in sunny Florida in under 2 hours. Humm...2 hours or 20 hours...no doubts here. Good luck and let us know how you make out!
PS...if you decide to fly, you'll love SWA! You may want to mention your fears to one of the flight attendents because they can help too. Lastly, watch them! This is their job and if they're not panicking I'm not panicking!

 

[THESCHULTZFIVE]

I am in the same boat. I haven't flown in almost 5 years and we are going down in August from PHL! My hands shake at just the thought of walking down that tunnel. I told my family I didn't book our flight when I made the reservation b/c I thought we could wait for something cheaper(which I hear we probably can) but the real reason is that I couldn't even get the words out of my mouth. I had a VERY shaky flight 5 yrs ago and I can still remember the feeling!!! Also, the last time I flew to disney, US air sent our luggage to Connecticut. Our flight had been delayed and finally cancelled and we didn't end up at Disney until 12hrs after schedule. But when we finally got there the Disney cast was UNBELIEVABLE!!! Well, anyway I just wanted to say that I'm scared too.I'll pray for you, ihearttink, if you'll pray for me!

 

[ihearttink]

First off, thank you all for your supporting words. I have been thinking of taking the xanax route. Took it years ago for something else and it gave me no ill effects. I should tell everyone about 20 years ago, back in the olden days, I had booked a flight to Las Vegas with a friend. I got on the plane and almost immediately off. My luggage made it to Vegas with my friend. I tried to do that cold turkey and it definitly did not work. Here are a couple of my fears:

1. Having a major anxiety attack on the plane and making a complete fool of myself;
2. Flying down and so worried about the flight back I can't enjoy my vacation; and
3. My biggest fear is a plan crash (there I said it).

I had almost had myself convinced months ago about flying and then saw in the papers and the news that planes were having those laser lights in the **** pit from somewhere on the ground. One instance would not had scared me, but this happened in different states, New Jersey, Texas and somewhere else. To me that is not a coincidence. They did make an arrest in NJ. But this whole thing just set me back.

I am going to call my doctor and talk to her about the xanax. Maybe then I could do it, just not sure..

I did try the the fear of flying, but that was before the laser incidents. It was helpful. Thanks again everyone.

wifeofjack - did answer your pm before logging on to the boards. Now a see your same reference to a small world after I sent my pm. As the saying goes, great minds think a like LOL.

 

[spiceycat]

i hate to fly too

but hey with these prices you would be crazy to drive. I only have to drive between 9 and 12 hours.

with the magical express you don't need to rent a car. what could be better?

Anyway I intend to take my cassette player, my dvd player and what really does it for me a really good book. Once that you can read and forget where and when you are. the cassette player and dvd you have to have OFF during landing and take-off. the books you can kept until you have to put everything away. - yes I know the worst part!!!

I haven't flown since 1999....

 

[janice1234]

i have the same problem, try a couple of coctails at the airport, it works for me. have fun

 

[annrae]

I had not flown in many years (last time it was puddle jumper) but I fly with my family to Orlando in Dec. It was great! My face was so flushed that my family thought I was going to have a stroke - I was absolutely terrified when I got on the plane but that feeling gradually faded away. When we landed in Orlando, I was very pleased to feel the earth under my feet, but it was great not to have to get out of a car after a two day trip! You will really enjoy the flight - we flew Airtran direct to Orlando.

 

[monorailsilver]

Definetaly fly out of Bradley like another poster said.

It is much smaller & less hectic then JFK/LGA (but I don't mind flying out of there either, my husband doesn't like to go into NYC when Bradley is only 40 min north of us).

And the best is when you land in Orlando & see the airport. I remember going to it for the first time after having been in the old Orlando airport many times. The Florida airports are beautiful (not as nice as Hawaii but compariable).

Kerri (in shoreline CT).

 

[DAWGPOUNDAJ]

What are the laser lights that you had talked about? I had not heard about that at all and perhaps one of the licensed pilots could explain those a bit better, and perhaps the explanation would put you at ease.

For many alcohol is exactly the wrong thing to take for fear of flying.
If you are completely petrified, getting tipsy will just make it worse. Xanax removes the physical reaction to the fears. No shaking, no butterflies. It allows you to relax without zoning out. It helps you realize how easy it is to fly. And how much better it is to be in a 737 than on I95.
You may fall asleep if you take Xanax, but that is due to being relaxed, rather than the thing "knocking you out".
Holly took Xanax for a few of our flights, now she does it without.
Ted

I just wanted to mention that I was in no way suggesting that someone get "tipsy. " Getting tipsy would be extremely wrong before a flight, how would they face the fear head on if their perception is warped by alcohol? I just meant that a shot or two would have a similar effect to Xanax because it relaxes people. Both Xanax and Alcohol affect the brain as someone pointed out in similiar ways. And yes, Xanax helps some people, but I'm a firm believer that people should avoid things like Xanax unless there is NO other option. I was merely suggesting another, and possibly cheaper depending upon ones health insurance, option. Societies biggest thing today is that if someone has a fear or a problem, then they should take a drug to alleviate their symptoms. This trend is a bit horrifying to me so I like to suggest possibilities that are not medications.

I would like to politely disagree with you. I conquered my fear "head on" and everytime I fly, I still get to the state of an almost panic. You can not pry my fingers from the hand rests. I personally belive that Xanax is the PERFECT way to fly. It puts me at ease. I don't feel I need it in everyday life, but to fly, it definitely takes away the physical reactions I have to flying.

Dreams91 brings up a good point that I had not thought of. Sometimes facing something head on does NOT work. In my personal experience it always has worked but for others it has not. Thats something to take into consideration as well. I'd say trying it out is worth a shot though.

GOOD LUCK everyone on your flights and conquering your fear of flying.

 

[ihearttink]

What are the laser lights that you had talked about? I had not heard about that at all and perhaps one of the licensed pilots could explain those a bit better, and perhaps the explanation would put you at ease.QUOTE]


You know the pointers with light they use at board meetings? People were flashing them from the ground into the cockpit of the plane. They can sometimes blind people. There was an arrest made in NJ and the charges being brought were federal.

 

[debden]

MY Uncle was in his mid-fifties before he got on a plane.He was extremely afraid to fly but when he flew NYC to Cancun and back he loved it. Now you can't keep him off an airplane!! He wants to make up for lost time and start travelling all over. I think it's great! If you can get the courage to go on a flight you might be happy you did. It cuts down on alot of driving time and your not half as exauhasted when you get to your destination.

However,I do like the advice Janice gave...Have a drink before you go! It'll help relax you..Really. I do NOT mean have a few and get drunk! NOT!!
When I'm going to be boarding a flight I'm sure is going to be really bumpy I usually have a cocktail. No problem.I'm alot more relaxed for the flight (Not Drunk)
Anyway,whatever you decide have a safe and fun trip!!
Debbie

 

[THESCHULTZFIVE]

What are the laser lights that you had talked about? I had not heard about that at all and perhaps one of the licensed pilots could explain those a bit better, and perhaps the explanation would put you at ease.QUOTE]


You know the pointers with light they use at board meetings? People were flashing them from the ground into the cockpit of the plane. They can sometimes blind people. There was an arrest made in NJ and the charges being brought were federal.

STOP SAYING THAT!!!! LOL! Gees, you are making me sooo nervouse. Why does it have to always be NJ???? LOL!!! I should just move to FLA!

 

[Martha7]

We've been having the laser problem in Detroit too, so it's not only New Jersey! Some years ago, my DH had a brief period of being afraid to fly. He had experienced a rough flight in Europe with his Dad. (Oddly enough, his Dad doesn't even recall the flight.) My brother gave him some 5 mg Valium pills, and it helped. My DH is the biggest control freak, and it was an issue of relinquishing control to the pilots. He said what helped him calm down and get over the fear was the realization that the pilots didn't want to die either, so they would be doing their best to fly safely. He's over the fear, and is a multi-platinum frequent flier. I say do whatever you feel will work for you! If you're not going to have to fly frequently, it's OK to take something to help relax you. My brother, the psychologist agrees that sometimes pharmaceutical help is appropriate for panic attacks.

 

[zzammmi]

therapist, shmarapist, bring on the xanax

I hear ya, Bugsy! I've got nothing against a little pharmaceutical assistance.

 

[bugsy]

I hear ya, Bugsy! I've got nothing against a little pharmaceutical assistance.

like the saying goes..."better living though chemistry"!