I am crazy for going to discon alone without family

[Mskanga]

This is what I was told today by some mothers today at school. Then again I was talking to those mothers who don't ever do anything away from their family , that's fine with me if that's what works for them, but I have to get away from my family every now and then, so does that make me a bad mother / spouse?? Do you know that this actually made me mad?? I think they were all just jealous. I love my family to death, but I love my sanity too.

 

[PandyPaws]

Kanga.... *sigh* yes, I think it must be jealousy. I heard it a couple of times myself
Let me tell you, this is the first trip I've taken on my own in, er *cough*18 years and the first I've been anywhere (including the darned bathroom, or so it seems ) without my kids....and all I can say is...it's doing me a world of good. Now, I love them to death, I miss them terribly, and I think of them at every turn....BUT the opportunity to relax, unwind, go at my own pace and have a little fun of my own is great medicine for the nerves and temperament I will go home renewed and refreshed

Take the comments in stride, Kanga....they tend to come from the same sources that roll their eyes and ask "you're going there AGAIN???"

 

[Mackey Mouse]

Kanga...please.....I think I would have given them the raspberry.. Sounds like jealousy to me plain and simple... they probably would be afraid to go by themselves...

Pandy, I am glad you are getting some R & R... you deserve it and work very hard all year long.......we all do... it is nice to get away by yourself when and if you can..

Enjoy ladies.. see ya soon..

 

[Nancy]

Do I feel a little guilty...As it gets closer to leaving time...yes. But I really NEED this trip by myself. I figure I'll come home and my kids will have more appreciation for what I do for them..(yeah right!)

Everybody I talk to at work about it seems to understand big time why I'm going solo...but I really don't talk to school Mom's at all...I'm sure they would all be horrified.

 

[NancyIL]

Most of my friends think I'm lucky to be going at all. Ignore the negative ones, Kanga - you'll have a wonderful time.

 

[CDoobee]

GUILT?
Yes, unfortunately, I know that one! And, I'm not coming alone. I'm bringing my DH, but we are leaving the kids at home! The 11 year old is staying at my parents house, and the 17 year old is staying home alone! BIG GULP!!! My parents only live 2 miles away, so they are available for anything he needs. My biggest worry is him getting up and to school ON TIME everyday, and remembering to feed and water the animals!!

BUT, I know Kevin and I need this time alone! I'm just grateful that my parents are close and willing and able to help!

See you all soon!

Debbie

 

[Mskanga]

Pandy you made me laugh....the bathroom is the only place I have been able to go alone AND because I locked myself in , but I still had kids knocking on the door....mommy....ROFL.
I have gone overseas three times with my kids , only once I left my children with my parents and went out with all my cousins one night, oh yeah, and last year onboard of the Wonder....kids in the clubs and dh doing whatever he wanted....( the only part of the family vacation that was a REAL vacation to me ) the rest of the days I spent doing what THEY wanted to do and since it was so hot , dh of course spent the majority of the time in the hotel room and I was walking around with the kids in the parks, until one day I said "you are staying with daddy and I will meet you later" he had no other choice but to take them to the MK and I went to EPCOT by myself for three glorious hours.
I know I will miss them terribly and I'm sure that at times but it will be good for all of us to miss each other a bit.
I knew you guys would understand! Thanks

 

[RaySharpton]

Hi, Mskanga. I can't wait to meet you and give you a big hug.

Last year, a lot of DISers talked about the very same thing, along with going after "9-11", and just going solo to meet with a bunch of people that we have never met in person before, nor talked on the phone before, nor knew what their real name was(only their DIS name), and, not even what they looked like.

Not knowing what another DISer looked like and not knowing their real first name made it difficult for me to introduce myself, etc.

Thank you Towncrier(John Hayes) for making everyone a limegreen button with our real first name and our board nickname.

(Has everyone thanked Towncrier(John) for doing this for you)

But it was all very magical.

Everyone loves Disney, and that is what we all have in common.

And everyone talks to each other on the DISboards(thank you, Mr. Pete Werner).

I believe that you will have the most "Wonderful", the most "Magical" Walt Disney World unique vacation experience in your life.

And this vacation for yourself will fill your heart with renewed magic.

You deserve this. And the other mothers that you speak of are just not understanding.

This is like a renewal for you.

You'll have a wonderful, magical time.

And your kids will give you big hugs when you get home because they will realize how much they miss you, the mom, being there all the time, and all the little(really...the big) things that you do that make your home-life and family-life work.

I think that you will be more energized by having fun, laughing, making new friends, and being more appreciated by your entire family when you return.

Just my humble opinion...lol.

Sincerely, Ray

 

[4greatboys]

I am one of those moms who never goes anywhere alone--the bathroom is included in that. I do feel gulity for not bringing the little ones. The big ones wouldnt be home that weekend anyway.
My dh is a great dad and can take care of the little ones but they never spend anytime away from mommie.
But I love the Dis and Disney and the 2 together sounded like such a good time that I couldnt pass it up. And yes I have had several ppl give me odd looks or comments when I say Im going to meet some great ppl I met here at this site. But then again they are clueless to all things Disney or the Dis.
I am looking forward to meeting everyone while Im there.

 

[nativetxn]

I've been travelling alone for years. I have had total strangers actually say the same thing to me I think it's sort of neat that they are jealous of me, and that's all it it.

I love to travel solo, it doesn't mean I don't care about my family.

 

[Towncrier]

I've had second thoughts about this trip. Last year I missed my DD Sarah's 12th birthday to attend DIScon. This year, thankfully, my trip is late enough that I won't miss her 13th. Sue won't tell our friends that I'm going to WDW solo. Again. Last year everyone wanted to know if we were having difficulties in our marriage. Sue and I are very close and we do practically everything together. So it was (and is) quite a shock to see us go our separate ways.

If I could bring my wife and children along to WDW this December, I would in a heartbeat. The time away from them is bittersweet at best. As good as DIScon 2002 is going to be, I know that I will savor my trip home and those first few steps through the front door when I will be greeted by my darling wife and two teenage kids. Life doesn't get much better than this.

My only advice to those traveling solo: Don't go overboard on the guilt gifts.

 

[luvdsny]

Olga, I too have had my fair share of other people giving me some flack for going solo. And I definitely have my fair share of guilt. I shed my first tears last night, and I don't think they will be my last. First thing this morning, after telling me about his dreams , my 4 1/2 y/o said 'now there's only 3 more sleeps until you leave.' And he said it with a smile, but it made me cry again. I haven't been talking directly to him about the trip, as I do not want to stress him out about it. However, he is very bright and has deduced for himself exactly when I leave. It's breaking my heart! I've even looked into buying him a plane ticket and AP so he can come with me. My DD, who is 11, is fine with me going. She'll spend most of her time at my mom's house anyways. LOL And I know that my DS will be fine, as he LOVES his daddy and my DH will be staying home with him, but it still breaks my heart. My DS and I do everything together. I'll miss him.

Now with all that said, I know I need this trip. I can't wait for all you to take my saddness and pain away!

See you soon.

 

[antnee]

i dont think I could do disney without having my family with me

 

[Zarr aka Joe]

A bad mom/spouse? Heck no -- it makes you human

I think everyone needs to do something like that - it will recharge your batteries!

We'll have a complete blast next week!!!!!! Looking forward to finally meeting you!

Pandy: now why didn't you zoom up to Boston and get me before going to WDW -- I could have used a few extra days at the World! LOL. Hope you're having a great time and see you soon

 

[MdmMim]

I, too, think they're jealous! I have travelled solo to WDW many times, and it's a great rejuvenator. A few weeks ago, I announced at work that I was going on vacation for a few weeks. "Where are you going?" "I'm going to WDW," I proudly said, "by myself!" They just looked at me like I was crazy. They don't know what they're missing!

DH is not a big Disney person, but he understands my need to go to WDW and how much I enjoy it. I savor every second of my solo trips.

Yes, you're a mom and a wife--but you're also a woman, one who is entitled to some time to herself once in awhile. Go to DISCon and have a great time!

 

[ripleysmom]

It does not make you a bad mom. I go away without my family sometimes. I have to.

 

[bashful64]

It definitely doesn't make you a bad mom. Sometimes we all need to get away and have some peace and quiet to retain our sanity.

Of course I have also had second, third and fourth thoughts about this trip. I am going to miss all my kids and my DH. My two oldest know that I am going and are ok with it. My DD who is 8 will probably spend most of her time with Grandma and Grandpa while my DS who is 6 will be over the moon becasue he gets to spend 10 days with DH. My littlest one (she just turned 3) is going to take it the worst. She will be ok and she loves her dad and she loves going to Grandma and Grandpa's house but she and I spend almost everyday together, she is a mommy's girl and we are going to miss each other. She already told me that the small suitcase is hers and the big one is mine and I am not allowed to pack anything into the small one becasue that is where her clothes go. *sigh*

It is going to be a very long and teary flight to MCO.....

but then I will be with friends and having fun....and of coursebuying everything in site to take home to them all

 

[mickeyfan1]

I tell people I am going to WDW, they say. Again?!!! How many times can you go there? And of course the inevitable, "Is your husband going with you?" My standard answer is I will never get to go there enough, and heck no, my husband hates WDW and his going will make me miserable. Now, I would love to be able to bring my youngest sister and her 2 boys this trip, they would have a blast, but she can't get the time off work, the boys are in school and can't get out. So it's me solo. I think a lot of people do envy us who can travel and leave our loved ones behind. All of the DHs, DSs, DDs, and DWs who are at home will survive, and probably quite well. Will we miss them?, you bet. Will we do family things again?, of course (unless they decide to send you alone again!). When you get home, you will be refreshed, ready to be that mom or dad or wife or husband or whatever again, and be just as good of one if not better before you left.

Don't let anyone try to make you feel guilty. I doubt that any of you did this with out discussing it ahead of time (except me, I just say, Mark your calendar, I am going wherever on this date for this long, he is used to it). Come and have a good time, call home and hear their voices, buy them a very special gift, you and they will all be fine.

 

[CarolA]

I am a child of a woman who went to Europe numerous times solo while I was growing up. My dad would be off at Military Summer Camp and I would either go to Girl Scout Camp or to my grandparents. (Now keep in mind that this was 30 years ago and communications between Europe and the US were as effective as they are now!)

I can honestly say that I don't think I suffered life long trauma because of this and I bet your kids will survive just fine.

My mom always bought us back one small gift and that was it (These were budget trips, she only got to go because she got free airfare from my Granddad who worked for the airline!)

Don't worry! I actually think it is good for your kids especially your daughters to see you going off on your own like this. I have never been afraid to travel solo and I think I can trace that back to my mother!

 

[Barb]

I didn't start taking solo trips until my boys were much older. But I do know it would have killed me to leave them when they were younger. As we have always lived away from our extended family, it's been just "me and my boys" forever. So I do understand those mixed feelings you're all having. I still have them. I would love for all of us to be going now. But that's just impossible at this time of year. What helps is knowing that we will be going as a family (or as many can make the trip) next summer. Right now, I'm just getting the "friendly" ribbing I get every time I leave them to go somewhere. They miss their mom/wife almost as much as I miss them.