Hucifer's recipe for disaster

[klacey1]

Hi, I'm joining in! I absolutely love your writing style-- hysterical! We stayed at WL last year and would stop off at F&W sometimes. It really seems like its own little world. My DBF loved seeing families hop into their golf carts haha.

 

[hucifer]

I have fallen to the forgotten area of the pre-trip report lands. How sad. Just goes to show that even a dusty ol' TR needs to be dusted off from time to time. So where were we?

Ah yes!

Not exactly what I had in mind, more like a Stand up Comic I don't picture you with a RED nose at all or orange hair for that matter Definately NOT Bozo for a name

Hmmm. Methinks you ARE picturing me with a big nose and clownish hair. While standing with a mike.

You can say that again…..we put a man on the moon….the berlin wall came down…..Maggie shot Mr Burns.

Uh...hello pot? You've written exactly one TR and promised to write another some four years ago. And thanks for the Simpsons spoiler. I wasn't quite done watching that episode yet.

Better late than never…..would have happened quicker if you hadn’t clogged your brain with all those veggies.

I knew it! Man, I’m tired of being right.

It must be exhausting.

Bad news. I’m pretty sure you were the last vegetarian. You could always tear the pages out. They could be useful for starting fires……wrapping fish…..that sort of thing.

Composting my meat garden, wiping Patrick's butt, etc.

Just think, for all those years…..what Dan thought was a swoon was actually a brief loss of consciousness.

He thought blue was my nature hue.

I love the Vandelay report! I have the kindle edition. Personally, my favorite part is the chapter on import/export.

It's one of those reports I just can't put down. (Nice touch on the import/export.)

Now that’s funny

Yet true.

And now,
the reason you came;
the most spectacular site you'll see all day.
ladies and gentlemen,

THE BACKSIDE OF OHIO!

You may not think so, but Patrick gets all excited when he sees it.

Well, in his defense, he was pretty busy learning motor skills, a language, and how to get around without a diaper.

I expected so much more from him.

Wow, insert ominous music and fade to black all ready. I’m picturing you slowly building into an all-out, throw your head back, evil laugh here.

Now we’re talking.

Well said. Maybe you should write this thing.

Okay, so this will be my THIRD attempt to reply to this update. The first time I started but then decided to wait until I was home so that I could give you a better link (see further down). Yesterday I thought "who am I kidding, I'm not going to do this from home", but my reply got lost in the ether-world when I hit the Submit button. Today, I'm going to save it to Word before I submit, just in case.

You good now?

Good thing the whip was out of frame.

I'm really good at cropping. (Read: NOT crop-dusting.)

T25 baby!

Oh, and check out today's Dilbert.

Have you done T25 yet? It's on my list of Beachbody products I'm going to try one day. I actually just purchased Brazilian Butt Lift. Yeah, we'll see how that one turns out.

Welcome to the household of the faithful!

But enough about meat, congratulations on your journey to a saving faith!

Thank you!
[in my best Annie voice]
I think I'm gonna like it here.

Are you telling me that this trip report won't contain any veggie-burger reviews? But they were always so informative and interesting!

I won't miss everyone laughing at my corn patties, that's for sure.

A vice-less Hucifer trip report? Let's hope that the Peanut has a weakness for chocolate or this is going to be borrrrring.

You obviously have no idea how much character my boy has.

Congrats to Dan though!

Thanks! No one is more thrilled than me.

Vandelay Industries! Vandelay Industries!

You caught that one. Yay you.

Love the Charlie Brown shirt.

Can't really tell from the picture, but Patrick is wearing a matching one. I was wearing my Peppermint Patty shirt and I called both of them "sir" all day in a deep voice.

There's a website that I can't get to at the moment because my work firewall prevents websites related to games (what do they think, we'll play games all day? well yeah, probably), that has simulators for Expedition Everest and the Haunted Mansion (Paris version, I think). You can control putting trains into service, loading and unloading people, etc. I think you can find them if you google "expedition everest simulator". Should be "themagical" website, I think.

I looked it up, but I got all confused and stuff. I think it needs directions or something.

Wendy, Wendy, Wendy! Oh, I've missed you so! And now I hope everyone can bear with me while I catch up. Oh, and I haven't read trip reports in a while so I need to get back in the swing of it.

Amy! Amy! Amy! Sooooo happy to see you here! I missed you right back!

Really? Extra points for using the word lugubrious in an everyday context! AND a Tolkein reference? I'm only like two paragraphs in and I already feel like I've hit the pre-trip report jackpot.

[blushes]
Gosh. Thanks.
[kicks pebble with toe]

Spooky. It's like you're right here in my living room.

I am a woman of many talents. Picking up on an apathetic audience is a specialty.

Pinterest--the cause of millions of partially completed craft projects all over the world.

I followed through on this one, though. Or did I?

And yet, I feel like it will be great entertainment for me so I appreciate you taking one for the team.

Anything I can do to entertain the masses.

Well, I know that I personally have fantasized about this trip report for several years now and I've never even met Patrick in person. In a total non-stalkerish way, of course.

Don't worry. That totally doesn't sound weird or scary or creepy at ALL.

All right, already, YES, YES, YES, and YES!!

Sally?

Hi, I'm joining in! I absolutely love your writing style-- hysterical! We stayed at WL last year and would stop off at F&W sometimes. It really seems like its own little world. My DBF loved seeing families hop into their golf carts haha.

Hello there Klacey! I'm glad you stopped in. Thank you for your compliment. I do enjoy writing about my woes.
I'm totally NOT renting a cart. Those are for the rich folks who can obviously afford a more expensive room option but don't for whatever reason.

 

[Peter Panic Attack]

Uh...hello pot? You've written exactly one TR and promised to write another some four years ago.

Fair enough kettle. But, I think you're forgetting that my last TR chronicled an extremely tragic event and that starting another one before I've had time to properly heal might be emotionally dangerous. I think you should also know that 3 out of my 4 therapists agree with me that it's too soon to start a new TR......and the fourth one doesn't really count because he's imaginary and almost completely based upon the character played by Bruce Willis in "The Sixth Sense."

Plus, I can't write at the same time as you because I'll suffer by comparison.

 

[jecskc]

Unlurking momentarily to proclaim myself a huge fan of your TR's. Can't wait to read more of the snark, sarcasm and wit that provides me with so much entertainment. Oh, and thanks for the new word - Ambsace. I mean spell check doesn't even know that word. I will retreat into obscure stalk mode and anxiously await your next post.

Susan

 

[englishrose47]

 

[norybell]

So, I actually read your update ages ago, like the same day you posted it, but I have just now managed to peel myself off the ground after passing out over your meat-eating news. Poor Simba has been crawling around our only 60% babyproofed home plaintively calling for his "b**ba, my husband has been crawling around moaning for his dinner, and the poor dog has been stuck with all the housework. Just this morning I finally took a deep, shuddering breath, raised myself up on one elbow, and croaked, "hucifer...vegetarian," before pulling myself back up to my computer and resuming my neglected DIS-ing duties (because, priorities, obviously).

Anyway. Congratulations to you and your family on all of your wonderful discoveries (God, meat, chantix, roller coasters). Dan may be a lost cause for the Disney World excitement, but I bet you can get Patrick on your side.

In unrelated news, in your S&M picture you look so much like a cousin of mine it actually freaked me out a little. So, I don't know if we're twins anymore (thanks to my lingering 30 lbs of baby weight), but definitely cousins, in a traditional, non-Patty Duke style.

And am I the first to catch your Princess Bride reference?

 

[bratus913]

here we are, another trip report? let's have at it. get me going for my last minute June trip.


how sad, our self portrait is missing

 

[glennbo123]

Any update on this disaster?

 

[glennbo123]

 

[Connie96]

Okay. So, I stumbled upon Peter Panic Attack's TR this morning. Catching up there, I saw your comments and TR link and came on over. Once here, I then saw that Great Biscuit had returned, as well, with a new TR.

Holy Resurrected Trip-Reporters, Batman!

For a Monday, today is turning out to be a pretty decent day.

 

[melk]

Just looking at my old subscribed threads.

Did this trip happen yet? Am I missing the real trip report because it's posted somewhere else? I don't want to miss out on any of the hilarity.