How would you politely decline wedding invitation ?

[Ember]

She may move in higher socio-economic circles, but she's lacking in manners! This is an example of why etiquette is so important. She has the choice to invite you to her wedding. Once she has issued the invitation that is where her part of this interaction ends. You have an obligation to respond. You did. End of social interaction.

Once you move into, "But why can't you come?!" you are firmly in the "rude" territory. It puts you in the position of defending yourself, which is NOT polite. You could be declining for a painful or very personal reason. You may be declining because you don't like her future husband. It doesn't matter. It's your choice and you made it.

If she continues to push I would say something like, "We've already talked about this. I do regret that I won't be there with you, but I have personal reasons for not being able to attend that I don't feel like talking about."

 

[emer95]

I completely understand and agree with your reasons for not wanting to go, but dang... a teeny tiny greedy part of me would totally want to take her up on her offer to pay for everything and just go for it, and make it a birthday my DS would never forget!

Not that I ever would...but just dreaming about it is fun.

 

[bubie2.5]

Once you move into, "But why can't you come?!" you are firmly in the "rude" territory. It puts you in the position of defending yourself, which is NOT polite. You could be declining for a painful or very personal reason. You may be declining because you don't like her future husband. It doesn't matter. It's your choice and you made it.

I don't think her asking is rude, I think she's asking because she wants to help her friend go to her wedding.

 

[Mom-to-2-Princesses]

I think since you are so understanding about how hard it is to get together for lunch/dinner with her busy, busy schedule She needs to be understanding about how you are busy on her wedding day

 

[MarkBarbieri]

Because if I tell her she'll probably just want to pay for everything....

Tell her that you are uncomfortable with that and would prefer to just have a private celebration at a later time. She's a friend. You should be able to have an honest and frank discussion about it.

 

[Stitchfans]

Give her your address, have her send the invitation. When the inviation comes, mark that you can't attend on the RSVP and send it back.

This is what I would do.

 

[ksjayhawks]

Let her send the invitation, then send the reply card back as "no". If she questions you on fb, simply reply "It won't be possible for us to attend as that is ds's bd weekend and we already have plans. We wish you and xxx the best and look forward to seeing pictures." Repeat this phrase over and over and over!!! Do not go into details, do not offer explanations, repeat the above phrase (or something similar.)

Send a card--and a gift if you want to.