How well would you have to know someone before you spend $1200 ...

[helenabear]

I probably wouldn't go unless I ether definitely had the money no problem.... but it would take a best friend or a close family member for me to spend that kind of money!

 

[momof2inPA]

My sister's family of five is flying to Hawaii for a wedding in a couple weeks. For what they are spending, they could buy a dependable used car. Hope they have fun.

If your husband was close to this guy in college, or if they were roommates, I would send him alone.

 

[nativetxn]

This would have to be my best friend or a family member. I would probably just send a gift instead

 

[CRSNDSNY]

We traveled once like that for my husband's best friend (DH ended up being best man). They got married at an all-inclusive in Nassau. We cashed in our AMEX points for the resort stay. Paid cash for our flights.

I regret the waste of AMEX points and money we spent on the flight. The Resort was HORRIBLE, dirty, disgusting, etc. The bride was hungover on her wedding day and DH and I aren't partiers so it was a total waste of time, money, vacation days, etc. for us.

 

[caitycaity]

we're in the wedding prime of our life too. for the past 3 years we've averaged about 4 weddings a year. this past year, i was a bridesmaid in one, and dh was a groomsman in 2. none were local. on top of that we attended 2 local weddings (fortunately less expensive since we weren't in them and didn't have to pay for a hotel/airfare).

if it were someone that i was good friends with, i would shell out the extra money to go, even if i had to put it on credit. after all, how many times does someone get married (hopefully only one or twice in their life. )? if it were just a friend or aquaintance, and i couldn't afford it, i wouldn't feel guilty saying no. send them a nice gift and call it a day.

i don't know if this is a national trend or not, but we do have friends and family living ALL over the country. most weddings require us to travel. i know when we got married we decided to have the wedding in wdw because we had people that would be coming from 15 different states, west coast, east coast and midwest. we figured we might as well have it some place people would enjoy themselves, if they had to travel anyways. that and it was actually cheaper than trying to do a wedding in d.c.

 

[chager]

I was invited to a cousin's wedding that was taking place on a cruise ship. The cost for us to go would have been close to $2500. We just couldn't afford to go. Of course the fact Dh is terrified of going on a "big boat" meant we wouldn't go even if we had the money. (He has Titantic comments when ever a cruise is mentioned. The whole "Well they said it was unsinkable and it wasn't" thing ) I think she just invited us to be nice and never really expected us to attend.

 

[Doug123]

I'm sure they don't expect you to go to their wedding. Looking at it in a positive way: it was just a nice gesture on their part. Looking at it in a negative way: they want another gift from people they don't expect to cost them a dine (i.e. show up at the reception).

 

[Kermit]

It would have to be a close family member or a really good friend for me to do it. And if I couldn't afford it, I wouldn't feel guilty at all.

We ended up sending invitations to some of the people we knew would never make it to our wedding because we didn't want them to feel snubbed. We were very grateful that most of them didn't send gifts. We would have felt guilty if they had.

I'm glad that we're past the wedding stage of our lives. For about 2 or 3 years, we spent our summers going to weddings. Now we go to baby showers.

 

[Pembo]

Dh was asked to be a part of a college friends wedding a couple years ago. (Dh is a minister). He hadn't talked to the friend in many years, the friend isn't religious at all (leans towards atheism) and dh had only met the bride once.

He didn't go. He called his friend said sorry we can't afford it. (We had a 3 month old at the time). We sent a card and gift. Haven't heard from them since.

Some friend?!

 

[Disney Doll]

I'd have him go alone, if he really wanted to attend. If he's not all that enthused about it, then a nice gift form the registry would be a lovely gesture, with your regrets at not being able to attend.