How to tell the kids Nonno died today

[KirstenB]

I'm so sorry. Do you have a pastor, or maybe your MIL does, who could help talk to your children?

 

[Tiger926]

I am so sorry for your loss...we lost my beloved aunt to cancer yesterday as well. She was only 48...

I have no advice as I'm exhausted and just on here as a distraction from the events of the past week, and the days ahead. I wish you luck in figuring out how to tell your kids - they have surely been through enough with losing their mom so young...

I'm sure my aunt has welcomed your dad into heaven with open arms! God bless you, your kids and the rest of your family this holiday season.

Tiger

 

[DWGal210]

As for the funeral, I'm going to ask them if they want to go or not. When Mommy passed away, the girls were only 3 so i thought they were too young. My son said "The last time I saw Mommy I got a hug from her, and I can't get a hug now so I don't want to go."

Your family is in my prayers.

 

[paintnolish]

My sincere condolences on the loss of your wife, and your father in law.

I'd tell the children that he died, and how. I'd make it clear that it was very unexpected and fairly rare.

I'd be very cautious about telling them that their Mother needed her Father so he went to be with her. Something like that can cause all sorts of connections to be made that you never could have foreseen.

Take care.

I'd tell them now. I remember when my Gma passed from cancer. I was 5 and she was too young (58). I remember knowing something was going on but not all the details. Like a pp said, kids are intuitive. It is best to be straight with them.Yes, I'd be careful telling them that their mother needed her father. I hate to say this, but what if they worry about being "needed" by someone in heaven? My dc's Gma passed away a few years and ds was 8-became obsessed with dying for a few weeks-would cry at night. That is when I stressed that Gma was very, very old (which is where I would stress that what happened to their Gpa was very rare). I am also so sorry for the losses you and your kids have faced.

 

[Tiger926]

I'd tell them now. I remember when my Gma passed from cancer. I was 5 and she was too young (58). I remember knowing something was going on but not all the details. Like a pp said, kids are intuitive. It is best to be straight with them.Yes, I'd be careful telling them that their mother needed her father. I hate to say this, but what if they worry about being "needed" by someone in heaven? My dc's Gma passed away a few years and ds was 8-became obsessed with dying for a few weeks-would cry at night. That is when I stressed that Gma was very, very old (which is where I would stress that what happened to their Gpa was very rare). I am also so sorry for the losses you and your kids have faced.

The thing is, being in your 50s is not old at all - that is very young, as you mentioned, and this is what confuses kids. So many people live until they are well into their 80s and 90s. Those are old ages, but in your 50s is very young to die...

We started to do this when my child was your child's age as well, but it doesn't work as we had a miscarriage, lost my uncle at only 60 and just yesterday lost my aunt at 48. You make a great point of children being worried that they, their siblings or their parents might be needed in heaven. This is where we are - we explained to my DD6, that our aunt had a bad disease that made her very sick (cancer). So far, she is good with this, but she is very bright and the questions keep coming. I am worried that she thinks that God might need her as we mentioned that God needed our aunt as an angel as she was the most generous, caring and loving person. I am concerned about the whole thing too, just as I'm sure the OP is. They already lost their mommy at such a young age, and now this...I am so sorry, OP, that this has happened to you and your family.

God bless all of you who have lost loved ones during this holiday season, and who now have the difficult job of telling our children of these deaths.

Life is so hard some days...Tiger

 

[ChrizJen]

I'm so sorry for your loss. I would tell your kids the truth. Tell them that their mommy needed her daddy to take care of her, so he went to be with her in heaven.

My thoughts & prayers are with your family.

That's such a beautiful way to put it. That sounds like a perfect way to tell them.
OP, I'm so sorry for all of the losses you and your precious children have suffered. My prayers are with you and your family.