How to tell child they are changing schools?

[DisneyNutMic]

We are moving soon (DS doesn't know this yet either as he is with his Father on vacation right now) and my DS will have to move schools. Any advice on how to tell him that might make it easier for him?? He is going into 3rd grade if that makes a difference.

 

[wahooker]

We are moving soon (DS doesn't know this yet either as he is with his Father on vacation right now) and my DS will have to move schools. Any advice on how to tell him that might make it easier for him?? He is going into 3rd grade if that makes a difference.

If there are specific friends he is very close to, you might want to talk to their parents, and see if you can get your son in some after school activities with them, so he can still hang out with them. Many Cub Scout Packs really start up their year of activities with the new school year, so that might be an option for you and the other kids Parents that is well timed, and would still let him be with his existing friends, even as he gets used to the new school.

 

[Indiana Rose Lee]

I hope you are going to give him some notice both to moving and to changing schools. As much as possible.

 

[DisneyNutMic]

He is already active in a Cub Scout pack (in fact I'm Den Leader). And yes we are telling him as soon as he gets home from vacation with his Father. So he will have over a month on the school change and several weeks on the move.

 

[Indiana Rose Lee]

Oh good! I was worried you were moving while he was gone! I've seen people do that and it didn't turn out well! Glad he is in scouts.

 

[h518may]

I moved a lot as a kid, and I don't think there is any easy way to tell kids about moving.

Some things that might help. Call the new school and see if you can walk through before school starts. Also if possible let him pick some new decor for his room, maybe let him paint the new room.

 

[bumbershoot]

I have no idea. My mom was going to marry and move cross country when I was in 3rd grade. I don't remember this, but she tells me that I threatened suicide. Yep, at 9.

She didn't make the move (not sure she loved the guy anyway, but he'd wooed her at a HS reunion).


So hopefully you can figure out a way to tell him that doesn't cause THAT response in him!

 

[Indiana Rose Lee]

I have no idea. My mom was going to marry and move cross country when I was in 3rd grade. I don't remember this, but she tells me that I threatened suicide. Yep, at 9.

She didn't make the move (not sure she loved the guy anyway, but he'd wooed her at a HS reunion).


So hopefully you can figure out a way to tell him that doesn't cause THAT response in him!

Is this even an appropriate response? Geez. It sounds like you were a controlling drama queen.

 

[phred52]

We moved every 2 years while I was growing up. My parents made each move an exciting adventure. We looked forward to to new friends, new schools, new house.... It was the spin they put on it. I had very smart parents!

I remember going as a family to our new school(s) and wandering around getting familiar with places before classes began. Moving was a positive thing for us as kids.

 

[ilovepooh]

Is it possible to take him to the new school and let him see it. Also, if you're close enough to the new area, perhaps enroll him in some activities that the local children there will be involved in. This way he can possibly make a few friends before school even starts up again. Good luck!

 

[muscarello4]

We moved when our girls were entering 3rd and 5th grades. We made it fun! We let the kids pick out new bedding and paint for their rooms. We got new pets....guinnea pigs! We let them e-mail and call their old friends whenever they wanted. They saw them for two summers, but eventually the friendships faded. They are now very close to their NEW friends in the new home. (Not that they didn't enjoy their old friends, but the relationships now are strong.)

My advice is to let him move on at his own pace. Drive him to go see old friends. Invite them over. Skype. When he starts to make his new friends, he will naturally be able to move on!

Good luck!

 

[DisneyNutMic]

We are only moving 10 miles down the road so he will still be able to call and see any of his old friends he wants to. It won't be a huge deal as far as losing friends.

 

[Leajess99]

We are moving soon (DS doesn't know this yet either as he is with his Father on vacation right now) and my DS will have to move schools. Any advice on how to tell him that might make it easier for him?? He is going into 3rd grade if that makes a difference.

I would sit him down and be honest with him. My oldest has actually attended 7 schools as a result of being an Army brat while his sister has attended 3. The youngest is now in her second school (out of district so I have to drive her everyday) but that was because of her old school having a mold problem causing her health issues. I always sat them down and explained the move and that I would help them get involved in things they like and they can make new friends. There are many books about moving and being the new kid at school.

Take the time to research the school and let your child check out the school's website. If you are only moving within the same city than let him have playdates with his friends from his old school.

Please do not wait too long to tell him that he is moving though.

 

[Leajess99]

We are only moving 10 miles down the road so he will still be able to call and see any of his old friends he wants to. It won't be a huge deal as far as losing friends.

Is there any possibility of him attending the old school out of district?? If you think it would be a lot of stress than check that option out. I was worried about my youngest's moving school (did it between K and 1st and she had already been in the previous school's preschool since she was 3 due to speech). While she still misses some of her preschool classmates, she does not miss the school. The distance from home to her school is 6 miles.

 

[Kriii]

We've been in this situation and usually just explained the move gently. There have been fears and tears that we dealt with by reassuring that all will be ok. Letting dd choose the paint and furnishings for her new room has helped. It also has helped to let her keep as many of her things as she wants even if they don't all fit in the new home. The biggest help has been to be willing to help her visit old friends. Your child will still make new friends but staying in touch with old friends can help. Good luck with everything.

 

[PollyannaMom]

I think the fact that you're not moving far, and you're doing it between school years makes it much easier. He'll still have his current friends, and he'll get to meet some more kids, too.

If he's nervous, remind him that there's no guarantee he'd be in a class with kids he's already friends with even if he was the same school, and that everyone feels new at the beginning of the year, so he'll be starting out even with lots of other kids.

And I agree with everyone who said make a big deal of setting up his new room! We moved 4 times when I was in school (same town) and I always loved the adventure of doing my new room.

If the new house has anything he's always wanted - a pool, walking distance to a playground, whatever, hype that up, too!

 

[DisneyNutMic]

The new house is GREAT. We have access to a pool, tennis courts, a pond to fish in, a GREAT place to ride our bikes. That's the main reason we chose the place actually. He will know a couple of kids in the school, not a ton but a few. I wish it were feasable to keep him in the same school but it's just not. I work in the other direction and his old school is 20 minutes the other direction. I would be driving about 1 hour 15 minutes each morning just to get him to school and get myself to work.