How old to date?

[PrincessKsMom]

Well poor ds, he got up the guts to ask this girl and she turned him down! He seems only slightly bummed, he did mention he'll probably have more fun going with just his guy friends! But I still felt bad for him. But its part of life and in some ways, I have to say I am a tiny bit relieved!

Sorry to hear it didn't go his way, but glad for you. It's quite possible, like I believe you previously mentioned, that her family won't allow her to date, so, hopefully that will be a small comfort to your son.

 

[saratogadreamin09]

Im currently 14 (3 months from being 15) and my mom just gave me permission to start dating.


Most of the kids in my class have been dating since they were 12/13

 

[saratogadreamin09]

Not meaning to rock the boat, but here goes: Why do parents believe that just because their child hasn't asked them permission to go on a "real" date, that they haven't? Just because no one is of driving age, doesn't mean that "real" dating isn't going on. You don't think that your kids find a way to be with their boyfriend/girlfriend? You don't think that just because it's not a real date in your eyes, they're not kissing, hugging, etc.?

I'm not saying all children do, but I'm really amazed at how many parents think their kids ask for permission/tell them everything that goes on. Do any of you remember asking your parents when you could smoke/drink/have sex? Again, I'm not saying that is what is happening with anyone's children, I'm just saying that I believe it's a little naive to think your kids will come to you every step of the way.

(Stepping aside to put on my flame suit now)

I know so many girls in my class doing this. They always go out with groups, or stay after school with there partner or just see each other in school and never go on dates.


Example-> this one girl in my class had a bf that her parents didnt know about and they had sex in the locker room one day after school. well her parents found out about her bf when she came home pregnant

 

[PrincessKsMom]

Im currently 14 (3 months from being 15) and my mom just gave me permission to start dating.


Most of the kids in my class have been dating since they were 12/13

Thanks for giving us a younger perspective on this issue. I'm always happy to hear from younger DISers because sometimes, as parents, we do forget how hard it is to be a teen. We've all been there, done that, but it's hard to remember how emotions play so much a part of being a teen

 

[Amy&Dan]

Sorry to hear it didn't go his way, but glad for you. It's quite possible, like I believe you previously mentioned, that her family won't allow her to date, so, hopefully that will be a small comfort to your son.

I think he waited too long to ask. The dance is this Friday, and apparently she is going with someone else. Ds always waits til the last minute for EVERYTHING!

Saratogadreamin09: You are just two months older than my son. Thanks for bringing some young perspective to the thread. And my dd12 has friends who "date" which seems crazy to me.

 

[Disney Doll]

I think he waited too long to ask. The dance is this Friday, and apparently she is going with someone else. Ds always waits til the last minute for EVERYTHING!

Well, then maybe he learned a little lesson...don't be a "Last Minute Louie".

Next dance, hopefully he'll get on the stick and ask her sooner! That probably depends on how much he likes her...

I actually broke up with my high school boyfriend 3 weeks before the senior prom because he would wait till the last minute ot ask me out. It was like he checked with all his friends to make sure there wasn't something better going on, and if there wasn't, then he'd make plans with me. Got his attention....

 

[saratogadreamin09]

Thanks for giving us a younger perspective on this issue. I'm always happy to hear from younger DISers because sometimes, as parents, we do forget how hard it is to be a teen. We've all been there, done that, but it's hard to remember how emotions play so much a part of being a teen

I think he waited too long to ask. The dance is this Friday, and apparently she is going with someone else. Ds always waits til the last minute for EVERYTHING!

Saratogadreamin09: You are just two months older than my son. Thanks for bringing some young perspective to the thread. And my dd12 has friends who "date" which seems crazy to me.

Its funny, when I was 12 I really thought I was ready to date but looking back now 12 is actually pretty young. I might look back 2 years from now and say the same thing, but I think that 14 is a good age to start dating.