How old is to old "BOYS" in ladies restroom?

[disneywalkers]

The post I was replying to was someone asking about a dad taking their young daughter to the parks and how they would handle using the restroom. Though I will say WDW is probably one of the safest places to let your child use the restroom without help or supervision. Cameras everywhere, and security all over the place. Not to mention many moms and dads who would step forward if it looked as if something odd was going on.

That's the assumption, but it didn't stop that man from taking pictures of boys in the AK (I think it was) bathroom this year. Usually if something has happened once, it has happened before. He was just the one that got caught.

I do want to believe that you don't have to worry at WDW though. That's a nice idea.

I just feel lucky when we travel (and when we are just out he has his 15 year old brother) my 6 year old son has his dad, paw paw and older brother he goes with and I don't have to decide if I should take him with me or not.

I totally get the concern though.

Recently in OK (my home state) an 8 year girl was assaulted in a public bathroom by a man while her mother was right outside the bathroom door waiting on her. He was hiding in the restroom and locked the door and assaulted her while her mother frantically tried to get the door open. Finally a worker was able to get it open, the man ran out and I believe he was caught by other patrons of the business. So that raised the question in that small town about children, in general, going to public bathrooms alone.

I have to be honest, it made me stop and think twice out letting even my 13 year old girl go alone to a public bathroom. I also have an 8 year old girl, and heck no she's not going alone lol.

It's a scary world. I believe we have to do what we feel is right as a parent and stop worrying about what others think all the time.

 

[disneywalkers]

Oh and let me add this, if cameras, broad daylight, security and the like kept criminals from committing crime, more than half of the crimes committed today, would be not committed.

 

[NotUrsula]

Oh and let me add this, if cameras, broad daylight, security and the like kept criminals from committing crime, more than half of the crimes committed today, would be not committed.

True enough, but those crimes are not secretive crimes that require privacy to carry out. And yes, it's all too possible to get felt up in a crowded place, but are you really never going to go to a fireworks show or ride a bus for fear of it?

Personally, I've never understood why people get so fired up over the possibility of a pervert stranger taking surreptitious photos of a child in a public place Not that I'm defending it, naturally, but what exactly is the direct harm to the child? The child does not know that the photo was taken, and is not identified by name in the photo, so there is no trauma likely. I fully agree that it is creepy and disgusting, and that perpetrators should be severely punished when caught, but I honestly don't worry about my child being victimized by it, because if my child is not aware of it and never will be, then I think that in the greater scheme of things, that scenario isn't really worth worrying about.

As to lurkers in restrooms, most multi-stall restrooms these days do not have locking doors, and if they do, then you make it a point to check when you enter. I *always* make it a point to do that in any public restroom if it isn't well-trafficked -- that is just common sense.

You know, a month or so ago I was approaching the ladies room at my local WalMart with my DD, and a man walked into it just ahead of us. When I got inside I mentioned to him that he was in the ladies', and he turned beet red and got out immediately. I guess I could have made a scene and screamed the place down, but I didn't, because it was clear to me that the man was just distracted and went through the wrong door by accident. Have you never in your life goofed up and walked into a men's room? I have: it's embarrassing, all right, but I'm glad no one has ever tried to have me arrested for it.

These discussions always disturb me because of the implication that every man on the planet is all too likely to molest a child if the opportunity presents itself. That's a heinous assumption to make. The average man would no more molest a child than he would commit premeditated murder, and it makes me rather angry to think that strangers might believe that of my husband and my son just because they happen to be male. Pedophiles are a VERY tiny minority in Western culture, and it is neither fair nor wise to tar every man on the planet with that brush.
Take reasonable precautions, yes, but don't succumb to unreasonable paranoia.

PS: Yes, of course this is a rhetorical "you", not addressed specifically to any particular poster.

 

[LilyWDW]

These discussions always disturb me because of the implication that every man on the planet is all too likely to molest a child if the opportunity presents itself. That's a heinous assumption to make. The average man would no more molest a child than he would commit premeditated murder, and it makes me rather angry to think that strangers might believe that of my husband and my son just because they happen to be male. Pedophiles are a VERY tiny minority in Western culture, and it is neither fair nor wise to tar every man on the planet with that brush.
Take reasonable precautions, yes, but don't succumb to unreasonable paranoia.

The whole being afraid that a man will do something to a child is an issue not just in threads like this. I have friends who are guys and who are teachers. They can't reprimand a student (especially a female student) without someone suggesting it is due to something else. I have another male friend who was on a run and decided to stop in a park area. He sat down near a playground and was messing with his phone (looking at his running app) when a mother came over and started to grill him about why he was so interested in watching kids and if was some sort of "sicko".

Most of this is simple paranoia. The stats do not back up the reactions. It is sad and pathetic that this is what the world has come to.

 

[disneywalkers]

True enough, but those crimes are not secretive crimes that require privacy to carry out. And yes, it's all too possible to get felt up in a crowded place, but are you really never going to go to a fireworks show or ride a bus for fear of it? Personally, I've never understood why people get so fired up over the possibility of a pervert stranger taking surreptitious photos of a child in a public place Not that I'm defending it, naturally, but what exactly is the direct harm to the child? The child does not know that the photo was taken, and is not identified by name in the photo, so there is no trauma likely. I fully agree that it is creepy and disgusting, and that perpetrators should be severely punished when caught, but I honestly don't worry about my child being victimized by it, because if my child is not aware of it and never will be, then I think that in the greater scheme of things, that scenario isn't really worth worrying about. As to lurkers in restrooms, most multi-stall restrooms these days do not have locking doors, and if they do, then you make it a point to check when you enter. I *always* make it a point to do that in any public restroom if it isn't well-trafficked -- that is just common sense. You know, a month or so ago I was approaching the ladies room at my local WalMart with my DD, and a man walked into it just ahead of us. When I got inside I mentioned to him that he was in the ladies', and he turned beet red and got out immediately. I guess I could have made a scene and screamed the place down, but I didn't, because it was clear to me that the man was just distracted and went through the wrong door by accident. Have you never in your life goofed up and walked into a men's room? I have: it's embarrassing, all right, but I'm glad no one has ever tried to have me arrested for it. These discussions always disturb me because of the implication that every man on the planet is all too likely to molest a child if the opportunity presents itself. That's a heinous assumption to make. The average man would no more molest a child than he would commit premeditated murder, and it makes me rather angry to think that strangers might believe that of my husband and my son just because they happen to be male. Pedophiles are a VERY tiny minority in Western culture, and it is neither fair nor wise to tar every man on the planet with that brush. Take reasonable precautions, yes, but don't succumb to unreasonable paranoia.

I'm assuming you're not meaning me specifically when you are using the word "you" in your post.

I'm worried or paranoid about any of it. I simply made a statement. I guess that statement opened up a lot though lol

 

[maxiesmom]

Oh and let me add this, if cameras, broad daylight, security and the like kept criminals from committing crime, more than half of the crimes committed today, would be not committed.

We are not talking about just any crime though. We are talking about one that rarely occurs out in public where there are numeros people around to be witnesses. And people who would step in and stop the crime from occurring.

 

[disneywalkers]

We are not talking about just any crime though. We are talking about one that rarely occurs out in public where there are numeros people around to be witnesses. And people who would step in and stop the crime from occurring.

Yes I understand that. My statement was based on another comment by someone else who made the statement below. (See way below) I'm not sure how all this helps keep bathrooms safe though.

And as a previous commenter stated there are fewer pedophiles than we think, I don't assume that as we can't possibly know that, as many haven't been found out.

We started going to a Church 6 weeks ago and last night we found out that the Children's Leader's husband (who also is the daughter and son in law of the Pastor) was sentenced to 12 years (last year) for solicitation of a 13 year old.

I'm still not sure how we feel about all that. That was a shocker.

My point being, we would be surprised.

I do give every male the benefit of doubt. I'm not worried about the bathrooms at Disney. Even after the man was caught taking pics of that 8 year old boy. Some gas stations yes lol

The problem with the pics I see, is if they do get away with it, our technology is such, that within 24 hours a pic over the stall of "your" boy or girl could end up viral.

But I'm not worried, I just realize it could happen. What I see on these threads, you have the over worried/paranoid and then you have the doesn't happen or at least not very often side. Then there's the good middle. I admit when I started having kids I was more paranoid about it but after having 6, I'm a little more relaxed.



Another commenter said "Though I will say WDW is probably one of the safest places to let your child use the restroom without help or supervision. Cameras everywhere, and security all over the place. Not to mention many moms and dads who would step forward if it looked as if something odd was going on."

 

[NotUrsula]

The problem with the pics I see, is if they do get away with it, our technology is such, that within 24 hours a pic over the stall of "your" boy or girl could end up viral.

But not on a general site or one that will be crawled by Google, so there is very little chance that anyone that the child knows would actually see it, unless the child unknowingly associates with pedophiles. Child pornography is illegal and very traceable on computers; for that reason it is hidden in places where it is pretty hard to just stumble across it. When this kind of stuff goes viral it does so inside chat rooms and on member-only websites, and my kids are not going to be there to see it.

As to schools, church groups, sports teams, etc., that *is* a context where pedophiles have to be screened for very aggressively, because that is the sort of position that they seek out: one where kids will know and trust them, and one where they can control the atmosphere and find occasions to be alone with a child. It's no accident that so many of the ones who are eventually caught are found to have managed to gain trust in positions and associations such as these. Any adult who takes such a position has to accept the fact that he or she is subject to scrutiny, and needs to be scrupulously careful to avoid any actions that might be misinterpreted.

 

[Granny square]

You can't protect your kids from everything. Working with what is probable you make decisions knowing that some like letting them have a youth leader, priest, teachers aid or Boy Scout leader, or even more so a parent or step parent are leaps of faith. Directing so much negative to stranger danger is foolish for the child. It is illogical and is causing a generation to grow up to not understand what is really safe and what is perceived to be safe.