How much power should schools have?

[Don Disney]

There are countless other places where children learn-NOT JUST IN THE CLASSROOM!!!!! Life experiences,wether it is acceptable to the school district or not,are some of the best learning opportunities!!! This does'nt only apply to vacations,but any,and all experiences a responsible parent decides to expose their children to-we missed a lot of school to go to places like The Smithsonian,Philadelphia,New York,Pennsylvania Dutch Country,Chesapeake Bay,New Jersey Pine Barrens etc..... I am so thankful for all of those experiences-very diverse.So,if the school has a problem with my family going to Disney World,or anywhere else that I choose to take MY children for life experiences,that's just too bad!!! I would not exceedingly have my children miss school,because their education is EXTREMELY important to us-just don't like,or will tolerate them telling me when,or where I can take MY children.I'll follow the rules as best I can,but ultimately,I will make that decision.

 

[jamstew]

Our attendance rules were in place well before NCLB. I can remember not being able to take a week off for vacation in elementary school b/c it was against the rules.

I've been wondering about all the people tying it to NCLB. My kids all graduated many years before NCLB. Our district had really strict attendance policies and serious enough consequences that I only took them out 2-3 times between kindergarten and graduation, and never for more than a couple of days at a time.

 

[JJ&JHsmom]

Attendance is becoming a huge problem in elementary schools because parents pull their children out for vacations in my area. IMO no child should be missing 20+ days of school per year unless the child has a serious illness. Districts are held accountable for student performance and if children are not in school, they cannot learn. Missing school for illnesses or family matters is one thing, but parents have options about vacation time.

 

[mwatson011]

Attendance is becoming a huge problem in elementary schools because parents pull their children out for vacations in my area. IMO no child should be missing 20+ days of school per year unless the child has a serious illness. Districts are held accountable for student performance and if children are not in school, they cannot learn. Missing school for illnesses or family matters is one thing, but parents have options about vacation time.

I would say that posters here are pretty much along the lines of IF their child can miss time WITHOUT compromising their grades/performance, THEN they typically find it ok to take the child out of school for (I am guessing) a week, which, the last time I checked, was five school days, not 20. Even if the child gets two colds during the year and takes a week vacation, they are still not up to 20 school days off. I think most people will agree that 20+ days absent for a relatively healthy child is excessive.

 

[princessmom29]

There are countless other places where children learn-NOT JUST IN THE CLASSROOM!!!!! Life experiences,wether it is acceptable to the school district or not,are some of the best learning opportunities!!! This does'nt only apply to vacations,but any,and all experiences a responsible parent decides to expose their children to-we missed a lot of school to go to places like The Smithsonian,Philadelphia,New York,Pennsylvania Dutch Country,Chesapeake Bay,New Jersey Pine Barrens etc..... I am so thankful for all of those experiences-very diverse.So,if the school has a problem with my family going to Disney World,or anywhere else that I choose to take MY children for life experiences,that's just too bad!!! I would not exceedingly have my children miss school,because their education is EXTREMELY important to us-just don't like,or will tolerate them telling me when,or where I can take MY children.I'll follow the rules as best I can,but ultimately,I will make that decision.

This is exactly the attitude that makes it so hard for teachers to work with parents effectively. Yes, it is your child and you are ultimately responsible for what happens to them, but you have chosen to entrust their education to a school. Wether you like it or not that means giving that school some of the power you as a parent hold to decide what is best for your child. I get that it is really hard for some parents to give up total control over everything that their kids see, hear, and do, but if you are sending them to school you are agreeing to trust the teachers and staff to do what is best for your child's education. To have the attitude that the school has no business controlling their education causes nothing but animosity and resentment on both sides.
Thumbing your nose at the attedance rules is just one more way of saying "you can't control me. I am in charge and no one tells me what to do." At that is what is really boils down to, power and control. Some parents can't let go of it, and some schools do have too much of it, like the school that suspended the child for dancing. However, when you agree to send your kids to a school, you are agreeing to their level of power nad control over what goes on. Parents have to work with the school not agianst it for the partnership to truly work.
It bothers me that so many parents have this attitude and I see it leeching through into the kids. I have students who tell me "my mom says you can't tell me what to do" or " Mom says she's going to come up here and straighten you out" Parents who do not support the school and thier decisions often lead to students with no respect for that school. I am not saying that your kids are this way, but that the choices we make and the example we set has lasting consequences for our kids wether we realize it or not.

 

[MoniqueU]

I live in CA where they threaten to send you to the DA if your kid has 10 or more absences. 2 years ago I could only go on vacation in June that year so planned a trip after testing was over and before the end of the year. I thought I could do the thing where they bring their work with them on vacation. BUt they don't allow that the last 2 weeks of school so my kids didn't get to makeup their work. It turned out not to be a big deal but when I got their report cards what was written down as absences was far less then what they really missed. Hmmmmm that was interesting. We went to Turks and Caicos and my oldest DD learned how to scuba dive. I would never take my kids out for a theme park vacation. I know this is a disney board and you guys all live for WDW but we have disney passes and live 45 minutes from Disneyland, so going off on vacation for a theme park trip no matter how fun it is isn't something I would remotely consider. A foreign country yes, theme park no way.
I havve an older son that is a sophmore in highschool at a private school so they don't have the absense policy that my girls have. He missed 7 and half days due to a legitimate illness and yes it is really affecting him. He is having trouble getting back in the swing of things, not enough time to make up tests and presentations. There is no vaction worth it to me that I would take him out of school for, it is just too darn hard to get back on track.

 

[here757]

i dont think the school had a problem until the same parents kept doing it over and over.. taking advantage of the situation.
once.. twice .. ok but every year.. thats not reasonable..
when these kids graduate high school missing alot of vital information.. who are these parents gonna blame? themselves?? NO. THE SCHOOL SYSTEM

the school systems have been forced to place these policies in place.

 

[Colleen27]

i dont think the school had a problem until the same parents kept doing it over and over.. taking advantage of the situation.
once.. twice .. ok but every year.. thats not reasonable..
when these kids graduate high school missing alot of vital information.. who are these parents gonna blame? themselves?? NO. THE SCHOOL SYSTEM

the school systems have been forced to place these policies in place.

How much vital information is being missed in a week of K? 1st grade? 2nd grade? It would be a sorry excuse for a parent that couldn't get their kids caught up at that level, barring unusual circumstances like a previous poster's foreign language immersion school example. My children would be missing out on far more by *not* vacationing during the school year, because that would mean NEVER vacationing as a whole family together. They can make up what they miss in 5 days away from the classroom, but there's no making up family vacations not taken because between school & work we can never all get away at the same time.

 

[MKCP5]

How much vital information is being missed in a week of K? 1st grade? 2nd grade? It would be a sorry excuse for a parent that couldn't get their kids caught up at that level, barring unusual circumstances like a previous poster's foreign language immersion school example. My children would be missing out on far more by *not* vacationing during the school year, because that would mean NEVER vacationing as a whole family together. They can make up what they miss in 5 days away from the classroom, but there's no making up family vacations not taken because between school & work we can never all get away at the same time.

So we're only talking lower grades here? Cause I have to tell you, you if my DS misses a week of AP physics, I'm not going to be able to helo him out!

 

[Don Disney]

This is exactly the attitude that makes it so hard for teachers to work with parents effectively. Yes, it is your child and you are ultimately responsible for what happens to them, but you have chosen to entrust their education to a school. Wether you like it or not that means giving that school some of the power you as a parent hold to decide what is best for your child. I get that it is really hard for some parents to give up total control over everything that their kids see, hear, and do, but if you are sending them to school you are agreeing to trust the teachers and staff to do what is best for your child's education. To have the attitude that the school has no business controlling their education causes nothing but animosity and resentment on both sides.
Thumbing your nose at the attedance rules is just one more way of saying "you can't control me. I am in charge and no one tells me what to do." At that is what is really boils down to, power and control. Some parents can't let go of it, and some schools do have too much of it, like the school that suspended the child for dancing. However, when you agree to send your kids to a school, you are agreeing to their level of power nad control over what goes on. Parents have to work with the school not agianst it for the partnership to truly work.
It bothers me that so many parents have this attitude and I see it leeching through into the kids. I have students who tell me "my mom says you can't tell me what to do" or " Mom says she's going to come up here and straighten you out" Parents who do not support the school and thier decisions often lead to students with no respect for that school. I am not saying that your kids are this way, but that the choices we make and the example we set has lasting consequences for our kids wether we realize it or not.

Thank-you so much for setting me straight!!!

 

[Colleen27]

So we're only talking lower grades here? Cause I have to tell you, you if my DS misses a week of AP physics, I'm not going to be able to helo him out!

Well, a lot of us who have posted that we take our kids out for vacation every year have specifically said that we won't continue to do so when their academic load becomes prohibitive. I wouldn't pull a kid out of a lab science class or any subject/level that I couldn't help him get caught up on, and since my DD is on track to go into the IB high school program, we won't be taking any vacations during the school year once she reaches high school. The reality of it sucks, to think that we've only got another 4-6 years (depending on DS's courseload) of being able to take the weeklong family vacations we're taking now, but it is something we'll have to accept at some point because they won't be able to miss school without difficulty.

 

[princessmom29]

Thank-you so much for setting me straight!!!

I am not trying to "set anyone straight", just to get you to think about what is happening from the teacher's perspective. Mabye I shouldn't have used "you" to talk about parents in general, but any other construct just seemed cumbersome. I know you probably don't want to hear it, could care less what I say, and are not going to change your opinion, but mabye someone else will think twice about passing that attitude on to their kids.

 

[MKCP5]

Well, a lot of us who have posted that we take our kids out for vacation every year have specifically said that we won't continue to do so when their academic load becomes prohibitive. I wouldn't pull a kid out of a lab science class or any subject/level that I couldn't help him get caught up on, and since my DD is on track to go into the IB high school program, we won't be taking any vacations during the school year once she reaches high school. The reality of it sucks, to think that we've only got another 4-6 years (depending on DS's courseload) of being able to take the weeklong family vacations we're taking now, but it is something we'll have to accept at some point because they won't be able to miss school without difficulty.

I agree! it does stink! I want to be able to show them the world--not just the WDWorld, but I do have to have some constarints now that they are older. No fun!

 

[princessmom29]

I agree! it does stink! I want to be able to show them the world--not just the WDWorld, but I do have to have some constarints now that they are older. No fun!

There is always study abroad. I did it in college and it was a GREAT experience!

 

[MKCP5]

This is exactly the attitude that makes it so hard for teachers to work with parents effectively. Yes, it is your child and you are ultimately responsible for what happens to them, but you have chosen to entrust their education to a school. Wether you like it or not that means giving that school some of the power you as a parent hold to decide what is best for your child. I get that it is really hard for some parents to give up total control over everything that their kids see, hear, and do, but if you are sending them to school you are agreeing to trust the teachers and staff to do what is best for your child's education. To have the attitude that the school has no business controlling their education causes nothing but animosity and resentment on both sides.
Thumbing your nose at the attedance rules is just one more way of saying "you can't control me. I am in charge and no one tells me what to do." At that is what is really boils down to, power and control. Some parents can't let go of it, and some schools do have too much of it, like the school that suspended the child for dancing. However, when you agree to send your kids to a school, you are agreeing to their level of power nad control over what goes on. Parents have to work with the school not agianst it for the partnership to truly work.
It bothers me that so many parents have this attitude and I see it leeching through into the kids. I have students who tell me "my mom says you can't tell me what to do" or " Mom says she's going to come up here and straighten you out" Parents who do not support the school and thier decisions often lead to students with no respect for that school. I am not saying that your kids are this way, but that the choices we make and the example we set has lasting consequences for our kids wether we realize it or not.

I hear that!!!! My DH is a teacher who a 5th grader get in his muzzle this year and tell him "YOU STAY OUT OF MY PERSONAL BUSINESS. GOT IT?" Can you imagine? Because my DH had spoken to the school counselor about his repeated issues in class and how best to handle them. Holy Cow! What is up with the no repsect factor? Dh is 6'1 and 240 lbs! And this kid had NO TROUBLE telling him that he needs to stay out of his personal business

 

[MKCP5]

There is always study abroad. I did it in college and it was a GREAT experience!

Oh I really hope my children will be able to do that!!!!!!

 

[Tinkmom75]

Originally Posted by princessmom29:
Parents have to work with the school not agianst it for the partnership to truly work.

This is only true if the schools also work with the parents. Not including extreme cases you stated earlier, there are a lot of good parents with good students that will not be harmed if they are taken out of school for a vacation. I think these cases should be considered by the administrators seperately, or schools should have guidelines like ours does. You can miss 7 days per trimester. There are exceptions for excused absences like pre-approved family vacations. If you go over the limit then student performance is looked at. To just say you take your kid out of school for vacation then you get jail time and a huge fine is ridiculous. I think this is why so many parents get the attitude you were talking about, because it does need to be a two way street.

 

[jamstew]

So we're only talking lower grades here? Cause I have to tell you, you if my DS misses a week of AP physics, I'm not going to be able to help him out!

No kidding! I wasn't much help to my kids in math after about 5th grade

 

[leeserw]

I am a teacher but family comes first. I took my boys out twice to go to Disney before I went back into the classroom. I got some not so nice comments but my kids were young and it wasn't like I took them out during a major test or anything.

 

[princessmom29]

This is only true if the schools also work with the parents. Not including extreme cases you stated earlier, there are a lot of good parents with good students that will not be harmed if they are taken out of school for a vacation. I think these cases should be considered by the administrators seperately, or schools should have guidelines like ours does. You can miss 7 days per trimester. There are exceptions for excused absences like pre-approved family vacations. If you go over the limit then student performance is looked at. To just say you take your kid out of school for vacation then you get jail time and a huge fine is ridiculous. I think this is why so many parents get the attitude you were talking about, because it does need to be a two way street.

I get what you are saying here, and yes communication does have to be a two way street. We have a similar system in place. It is 4 parent notes per semester, and then it must be doctor's note only. I deo hiwever think that it would be impossible to have schools make decisions on a case by case basis. One parent would be saying " but so and so got to do it so why can't we" ect, and believe me it is almost impossible to explain to a parent that the other student could handle it, but yours can't.