How do you know when it is time to help an elderly parent?

OP, it's probably best not to try to speak to the doctor over the phone, because he/she is almost guaranteed to be rushed. You'll have trouble getting the message across in the time that you will have.

I've found that in cases like these, the very best way is to call up the office and ask for a fax number, then type out all the incidents and send the information over via fax, with a note at the end for the doctor to call you if there are any add'l questions. Needless to say, you don't want to get too wordy; go for bullet points. Having the incidents listed this way gives them time to look it over before a visit and map out any tests they think are necessary; it also lets them forward the info to specialists more easily if a consult is needed.

Sending the information this way also gives the physician the assurance that you are NOT fishing for info that he/she is not allowed to give you -- these kinds of interactions require that all info goes one-way, from you to the physician. They can listen but they cannot comment, so it is easier for them not to do this by phone.
 

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