How do you deal with temper tantrums on vacation?

Minnie824

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May 7, 2000
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We took DDs away for the weekend - just one night, and now I'm kindof discouraged for our Disney trip this fall. DDs are 3.5 yrs and 1 yr. We went to a nearby resort town, indoor waterpark, huge kiddie area. They loved swimming and playing and had a great time. After that, we went back to the room, and rested a bit. Neither napped...older one doesn't anymore at all, and younger one, unfamiliar w/playpen not crib for sleeping, plus she had napped the whole drive there. So, then we went out, shopped around, older DD a little grumpy, wanted to buy something. Once we ate our early dinner she perked up. Went to swim again, then went to the gameroom. Big mistake. Older DD saw care bears in one of those stupid claw games where you *try* to grab the stuffed animals out. She wanted one, and we tried, but then I explained to her it was a game we couldn't just buy one. She played a couple more things, then we left. Just went to the lobby to look at gift shop. She wanted water. Her cup. I told her to take a drink from the drinking fountain/bubbler, we'd be 5 min in shop, then back to room. That wasn't acceptable. She screamed and yelled. Finally DH took her back to room, and that was the end of our evening.

Now, I know she was tired, and probably hot, but we rested when we could, asked her about snacks/water all the time. Not sure what else we could have done, other than sit in the hotel room all night. Overall we had a great weekend, but even with one minor setback like that, it makes me wonder how Disney will go. We definitely plan to take breaks, and try for naps in the afternoon there, but for 6 days of going, and new stuff, and being hot and tired, I just don't know how it will be now. Any advice? Thanks!
 
With our DD we try to keep as much to her regular schedule as possible whenever we're away and that helps a lot. We also know that the 1st night in a new place will be rough. Think about it from the child's point of view - everything is new and different. Different smells, sounds, sights, tastes etc. We take as many familiar things with us as possible (toys, bedtime stuff, soap/shampoo, juice boxes, snacks etc) plus we bring some new things to make the trip fun for her.

She's almost 6 now so meltdowns are getting much fewer and farther between. However, when she was your older DD's age we'd just take her someplace quiet and let her get it out of her system. It would last 10-15 minutes and more often then not she'd fall asleep. We learned quickly not to push her and it made the vacation much nicer for all of us. Believe me we spent many evenings in our hotel room reading or watching quiet TV since DD's bedtime is 8pm. Often we'd use this time to take turns exploring our resort.
 
when all 3 of our mice were smaller (actually until about age FIVE!) I always brought along their own "sippy" cups from home and carried them in my bag. Personally, I cannot stand public drinking fountains and it turns my stomach to think of any of our children putting their mouths on them. (YUCK!) Now we bring in bottled water with us in a soft-sided cooler. Just keep them on scheduke as much as possible and bring along fun new snacks for them to eat while in the park. (There are Disney fruit snacks, although your 1 yr old would be too small, sealed fruit cups, teddy grahams, etc.) I thing I have always found, a hungry and/or tired kid (or hubby! :rotfl2: ) makes for a miserable time for me! Try to keep them hydrated and fed! There is certainly a LOT of stimulation in the parks, after all, you will be going to the "Happiest Place on Earth!" So, even if they don't nap, enjoy some "down-time" in the room while cooling off and/or swimming. I'm a grown-up and I can't sleep anywhere but my own bed either. Good luck and have fun! :flower:
 
Your 3.5yo sounds pretty normal to me. You didn't do anything wrong and lots of things right. Under the circustances I don't think you could have prevented the meltdown (except to stay out of the game room, but you know that now!) She was tired and out of her element. So you scoop her up and head back to the room. Draw a warm bath and watch a little Tv. Bring books to read and things from home that she likes to do(puzzles, coloring pages, paint with water, playdoh) Travelling with young kids is not easy, but if you are flexible and don't set your expectations too high you can have a lot of fun.

Hopefully by the time you go to WDW she will have matured a bit, but don't count on it. You know the drill-rest time, water, eat as normally as you can, keep regular sleep hours. We still have at least one meltdown every time we go, and sometimes it's the adults!

Cathy--mom to John(18), Eleni(12), and Christian (10)
 

Much like you when our kids have a melt down we remove them from the situation. I am not sure how well this would work in a hotel room, since we have a travel trailer and can leave the boys inside while we sit just outside. What we have found works for us at nap time is we put in a movie for them to watch and they must stay quiet. Last year my younger son who was 1 at the time would fall a sleep watching the movie, the older one would just relax.
 
I'm going through the same thing now with my 4 year old and 2 year old (although mostly it is the older one)....So much depends on them being tired. I can see a visible change in Grace's behavior once she is tired and it gets worse once she is overtired. The secret is to get them to rest at the first sign of tiredness...if they pass that point they start to lose control and thats when the acting out or tantrums begin. MY dh and MIL are kind of commando with the parks and don't get the point of going back to the hotel to rest so I plan on taking midmorning for shows in darker places, an early counter lunch where they can rest and really just watch how they are behaving. I'm also insisting on a slow morning and afternoon rest the day we do MVMCP since that is the one day that is different from their typical sleep schedule. And of course ditto on keeping them fed and hydrated!
It sounds like you did things right on your trip and the best thing is to remember the triggers and keep note of them on smaller trips so you know what to avoid come Disney time!
Good luck!
 
I'm sure that they will do just fine in WDW. One piece of advice that I would give it to stay out of the shops. If you want to shop, then let DH do something with the kids while you take a peak. If they don't see it, they won't say they want it. Then, near the end of your vacation you can take the kids to get one or two nice things at Downtown Disney. This worked well for us on our last trip.

When our kids were younger, they would have their grumpy moments as well. I always made sure I had snacks and drinks on hand. It is amazing how a package of gummies can completely re-direct the behaviour of a young child.
 
The best thing you can do is pace yourselves. Head off meltdowns at the pass. And then just do what you did. Dont tolerate it take her home, or off to a corner.

I highly reccommend the book 1-2-3 MAgic at this age. You might think you know what its about, but if you havent read the book you need to.
 
I agree with Minkydog.

Your expectation for a WDW trip with small kids is going to be lots of time in the room. There are kids who can go from 8:00am to 10:00pm, but I think they are the minority. Don't try to fit in "one more thing" - its almost always a mistake.

We skipped real naps in favor of slow afternoon, naps on transportation, and early bedtimes. But my kids aren't great nappers - know your own kids. What works for your kids may not work for mine.
 
One thing I would add... My DD at 4 was thrilled to ride many things but her fears get her super upset about rides that I would not expect. She is terrified of Its a Small World, but rides the Haunted Mansion. We let our kids be our guides. If they want to try it we will, if not then we pass it by. If it is something that will make or break the trip for us we will stand in line together and then child swap if we need to. DD was very afraid at the entrance to Buzz but once she saw the cars and knew they did not go any faster than she could walk she decided to ride and had a great time. If she had wanted to skip it we would have let her.
 











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