Horrible Roommates

[Callie]

I got stuck with the absolute worst roommate at school ever. I can't even begin where to start, but I am just boiling now with what she has pulled.
We need swipe keys (like hotel keys) to get into our building, and then our apartment. Well she has misplaced this key twice in the past 2 weeks. She cannot find it again, and instead of getting a replacement (its like 10 or 20 bucks), she has been leaving the sliding glass door unlocked!

We live on the ground floor, how stupid can she be? She also stole the wood security beam and stashed it in her room. I've reported it to the housing president but now just again, I came home to it open.

Just adding it to the list of a person
*Who has never cleaned the apartment
*Doesn't use soap on her dishes
*Doesnt use silverware, except a giant wood spoon to eat
*Has a crazy bf

and it goes on.

 

[mhsjax]

I got stuck with the absolute worst roommate at school ever. I can't even begin where to start, but I am just boiling now with what she has pulled.
We need swipe keys (like hotel keys) to get into our building, and then our apartment. Well she has misplaced this key twice in the past 2 weeks. She cannot find it again, and instead of getting a replacement (its like 10 or 20 bucks), she has been leaving the sliding glass door unlocked!

We live on the ground floor, how stupid can she be? She also stole the wood security beam and stashed it in her room. I've reported it to the housing president but now just again, I came home to it open.

Just adding it to the list of a person
*Who has never cleaned the apartment
*Doesn't use soap on her dishes
*Doesnt use silverware, except a giant wood spoon to eat
*Has a crazy bf

and it goes on.

And some people say that you should never miss the going away to college experience. Um No thanks. I will take my nice comfy home, and no crazy roommates thank you.

Sorry, no advice. I hope everything works out for you.

 

[mamacatnv]

Mom of a college aged kid who has survived a year of dorms, a year of student housing and now has 2 female roomates who are ready to kill him. Their last big brewhaha was something to do with papertowels, toilet paper and hand soap. In his defense he says "They've known me since the dorm, they know I am not Martha Frickin Stewart" I bought their house a case of each to keep the peace.

Okay, all funny aside. You need to continue to harass housing and go up the ranks. Your roomies actions are a direct safety concern for you. I am assuming this is some sort of student housing?
Do not hesitate to get your parents involved if need be. Sometimes, RA's are little more than camp counselors and you need the respect that a parent (who might be helping with the bill) would command. I also suggest you document your conversations with housing.

The other stuff, well, welcome to co-habitating with a stranger. My DS has learned all sorts of things from housing arrangments including conflict resolution and how to stand up for himself.

 

[Callie]

Mom of a college aged kid who has survived a year of dorms, a year of student housing and now has 2 female roomates who are ready to kill him. Their last big brewhaha was something to do with papertowels, toilet paper and hand soap. In his defense he says "They've known me since the dorm, they know I am not Martha Frickin Stewart" I bought their house a case of each to keep the peace.

Okay, all funny aside. You need to continue to harass housing and go up the ranks. Your roomies actions are a direct safety concern for you. I am assuming this is some sort of student housing?
Do not hesitate to get your parents involved if need be. Sometimes, RA's are little more than camp counselors and you need the respect that a parent (who might be helping with the bill) would command. I also suggest you document your conversations with housing.

The other stuff, well, welcome to co-habitating with a stranger. My DS has learned all sorts of things from housing arrangments including conflict resolution and how to stand up for himself.

Yes, its student housing, except basically apartments. My mom says that if they don't inform me of the solution (since my safety is at risk because she's an idiot) then she'll come get involved.

 

[Katie's Butterflies]

Roommate issues stink! (Sometimes litterally!)

Have you tried talking to her about leaving the door open? Because that is a big security issue that affects everyone. Is it just you 2 or are there more people in your apartment? Maybe you could have a (non-accusatory)meeting. Sometimes some people just need a little help seeing the issues.

If you have tried reasoning with her, do as a pp stated and go up the ranks of your housing admins. The door is a serious issue.

Good luck and look on the bright side, it could always be worse!

 

[KPeterso]

I would definitely keep escalating the issue about the door. That is a safety issue, and needs to be addressed and now. I would also start documenting every time you find the door that way, so you can prove this is more than a 1 time thing.

I had a winner of a roommate my freshman year in college. I have a special pet name that I refer to her as many years later, but it is not DIS appropriate. I think one of her finer moments was during parents weekend when she told my parents (who were treating her to a very nice meal out) that I exhibited the classic signs of being a spoiled only child of affluent parents. My parents were too stunned to hear that to respond. Maybe in some ways I was, but in many ways, I was not. She also later told me to move out, and I told her if she was so unhappy that she could leave. She applied for the room change, but did not like the options offered to her, and knew there were openings in other dorms that she would prefer. Guess, I was not that bad then since she didn't want the other options.

I have a lot of other stories about her. I was so happy she did not return to school after freshman year, so I never had to see her again.

good luck, and document, document, DOCUMENT!

Kristin

 

[fraggle551]

It'll be over soon enough. I am so beyond thankful to no longer live with roommates. It just sucks most of the time. The only way anything ever got done at my school (which was a private catholic school) was when my parents called. I could talk to everyone until I was blue in the face and nothing ever happened. Somehow magically right after my father called, everything was taken care of. I hated that my parents needed to fight my battles for my, but at my particular school it was the only way anything got accomplished.

Good luck to you! Just think, summer break is around the corner.

 

[Callie]

Well, I sent her a text saying how its such a serious issue, and that if any of my things get stolen, or I get hurt in any way shape or form she can bet my mom and her lawyer will be taking her to court for the costs. She just laughed it off.
Note I came home to a wide open door after this even.

 

[MnMomtoboys]

This is a major safety issue. And not just for you for the whole building. Get your parents involved now and tell other people in the building that she is doing this. If something happens and someone breaks in she could say that you were leaving the door open. Protect yourself and do something.

 

[holycow]

You POOR THING!

Ugh. I still had nightmares about my room mates in college and that was 30 yrs. ago.

How long do you have to put up with it. Doesn't sound like you are compatible.

 

[DISvirgin1]

Lock her out. Seriously.

And tell whoever is in charge what she is doing. Not sure how many years ago it was, but the college killings in Gainsville come to mind. I believe many of the murder victims had their doors propped open.

 

[merekc]

This is a major safety issue. And not just for you for the whole building. Get your parents involved now and tell other people in the building that she is doing this. If something happens and someone breaks in she could say that you were leaving the door open. Protect yourself and do something.

I don't think I would tell other people in your building/on campus she is doing it. That is just an invitation for trouble.

I would agree that you need to escalate the issue immediately for your own safety. I would also go to the hardware store and buy a bar to use yourself to lock the door even if it locks her out.

 

[Callie]

You POOR THING!

Ugh. I still had nightmares about my room mates in college and that was 30 yrs. ago.

How long do you have to put up with it. Doesn't sound like you are compatible.

I've been dealing with it since AUGUST! We move out the first week of May.
She stays up all night, gets up early, keeps the heat so freaking hot! as well as cooks disgusting smelling mexican sausage bright and early that makes it impossible for me to sleep.

 

[Callie]

Lock her out. Seriously.

And tell whoever is in charge what she is doing. Not sure how many years ago it was, but the college killings in Gainsville come to mind. I believe many of the murder victims had their doors propped open.

I do, I'm not sure how she keeps getting back in, unless now shes just doing it to piss me off. I've only told the RA's i've talked with, and the Housing President. I found the missing bar hidden up in her cabinet in the kitchen.
I've also moved most of my stuff into my room, except my TV because its old, and I guess if its stolen, it just means she'll be buying me a new one.

But for real, I was sitting here when this all started watching tv, and I hear the door moving, and then the curtains, and I'm FREAKING OUT. There she pops in like its no big deal

Also I just sent her another text saying to stop being stupid because she can get a huge security fine for her dumb games (I just read it in a book. Its over a $100). I hope they do.

 

[PixieDustandEeyore]

I lived on first floor of dorms for 4 years and we were told not even to leave our windows open (unless we were ready to face the consequences), so a door would have been a no no!

Good luck with your roommate problems! I know they can be tough can you report it to your residence advisor? My first year we had to report issues with a roommate and they took care of it pretty well.

 

[Princess_Meghan <3]

I had a friend who's roommate left their front door unlocked- not as bad as you have it, since yours actually leads to outside! This girl refused to take her keys anywhere, so one night, my friend packed what she needed, and locked the room up tight, with her roommates keys inside. she went and spent the night in another friend's room. Her roommate was forced to go to the RA because she was locked out, and had to pay lock out fines, etc.

Eventually, my friend switched roommates, and now she's really happy where she's living.

If it's possible, lock the door, put the bar in place, and leave the room. that way she can't get in, and can't get you to let her in. she might be forced to go and talk to someone about not having a key to the room anymore.

I would keep doing everything you've done- sometimes the higher ups at my school ignore a person if it's just one or two e-mails, thinking its a one time thing. if you keep pestering them about it, they'll have to do something.

Is it way too late to request a roommate change? even if your roommate is forced to get a new key and stop keeping the door unlocked, she may not be too happy with you since she has to pay those fines.

 

[Callie]

Shes already used up her lockout fees because I have never let her in. I lock up everything. Now I check the sliding door all the time. It was locked when I left for the animal shelter, and when I got back, she was gone, and it was unlocked

 

[Tink9721]

And some people say that you should never miss the going away to college experience. Um No thanks. I will take my nice comfy home, and no crazy roommates thank you.

Sorry, no advice. I hope everything works out for you.

I totally agree. That's why I'm living at home when I start college next year. 20 minute commute, I have a car, and it's just me and Mom at home.

Sorry OP! Good luck

 

[mom2grace]

Contact campus security/police, vice president of student affairs, etc. Do it in writing so you have proof.

Is it nearly spring break for you?

A nice letter from an attorney asking for a new room after break might be effective.

 

[Bi-winning]

You could try to work it out with the roommate. Or, depending on how far you are willing to go to get rid of her, you could plant drugs (harder than weed) in her side of the room, tell campus security about it, then give campus police permission to enter and search the room. Not that I recommend doing this, but if you are a utilitarian, it would work.

Also, don't hide it deep in her belongings because they don't have the right to search it. Leave it on her desk.