Honeymoon Registries??

[Julia M]

Hello,

I am curious about what people think about honeymoon registries. My nephew is being married and with the shower invitation I received 2 cards-one with the store registry and one with "honey fund" registry. They are essentially listing their airfare, hotel, car rental and all the "extras" one would do in Hawaii: scuba, tours, dinner show, etc.

I'm middle aged-almost 50 (wow, it's hard to write that!!), so maybe younger people (in their 20's, for example) see this as something typical?

I'm keeping an open mind, but I don't think I really like it. A wedding gift seems different-giving something the couple may use for years to come (I still use some of the wedding presents I received-some on virtually a daily basis, like my silverware). Somehow I feel like you should pay for your own honeymoon!

It's not a huge deal for me, although I do feel it's tacky~I definitely won't donate to it-but am curious what others think?

Julia

 

[WhateverLolaWants]

Certainly something different. I do hope that the honeymoon fund is just options for the wedding gift instead of in addition to.

 

[We_Love_Disney]

I agree that it is tacky. Laying out what you want people to spend their money on is a very tacky thing to do.

The only exceptions, imho, are place settings.

 

[VAfamily1998]

I'm 35, got engaged when I was 22 and married at 23 (in 1998).

I think honeymoon registries are tacky.

When someone I know gets married, I prefer to give them something off their registry at the shower--practical household stuff like towels, pots and pans, kitchen utensils, etc. For the actual wedding gift, I prefer to give something off the registry that is "fancier" like silver, crystal, or fine china...

 

[RayaniFoxmur]

I think it really depends on the family.

We had a regular wedding registry, and a small Disney honeymoon registry with specific dinners and merchandise like a cookbook or bride and groom ears.

HOWEVER in my family a lot of times wedding gifts are ear marked for certain things. Many times in the card people will write "For your first home together!" or "For your honeymoon!" when a check is included. We had quite a few people buy off of our honeymoon registry as well as our regular. Really it was just another option of a registry, they weren't expected to buy off of both.

I do think that Honeymoon registries are becoming more accepted, especially for those couples who are more established and already have things that they need in the home. However, if I didn't know my family as well as I do I don't think we would have set one up ourselves.

ETA: Here's the Disney one: http://honeymoonregistry.disney.go....gLanding/trialProductCatalogLandingPageRender There's Accommodations on there which I think is pretty tacky to include but also things like dining, merchandise and recreation which I would have no problem contributing to. But again, that's just me and my family. YMMV.

 

[DisneyBamaFan]

I have no problem with them asking, but I wouldn't give to that. A wedding present is sufficient.

 

[lsyorke]

Uhhh, if you can't afford a honeymoon, you don't go on one...maybe I'm just to old to "get" this.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

I don't like them.

Perhaps if it were in lieu of a gift registry, I would reconsider. But no, I am not funding your once in a life time dream getaway.

 

[rie'smom]

Uhhh, if you can't afford a honeymoon, you don't go on one...maybe I'm just to old to "get" this.

Pretty soon couples will register at the bank and ask for house down payment money or electric bill or cell phone money. 1 shower gift and 1 wedding gift is my limit. Why don't parents teach their children what's appropriate or better yet have brides and grooms to be never read an etiquette book?

 

[Disney Doll]

Tacky...like a lot of other things these days.
We are losing our sense of propriety.

 

[VAfamily1998]

I googled "honeymoon registry" and found a website where you can register. It also showed a "sample registry"...not sure if it's against TOS to put a link to it from here, so I won't, but basically some of the wording it used REALLY turned me off and confirmed my thoughts of honeymoon registries being tacky. In the sample it told hypothetical guests that they didn't want to "settle for a standard hotel room" on their honeymoon, and with the guests contribution they could upgrade to a luxury room.

 

[minkydog]

If you're old enough to get married, you're old enough to pay for your own dang party! And that goes double for the honeymoon. I would never, EVER think of asking people to pay for my vacation. In fact, when DH & got married we were poor as church mice.Our entire wedding cost $300. You wanna know why? Because that was the sum total of our savings. We didn't have a honeymoon/vacation until about 3 years later. When could afford to pay for it ourselves.

 

[Pakey]

I would not purchase a honeymoon registry gift and I'd be embarrassed if my children did this. Two of the three are married so I'm in luck so far.

 

[starann]

I don't think the registry is in addition to a gift, but in place of it. A lot of couples now already have a house or apartment set up (as most live together before marriage) so they may not register for the typical bridal registry stuff. A Honeymoon registry is to give them something to make their vacation better....a nice meal, an excursion, upgrade their room.

As a guest of a wedding YOU have the choice of what to give....something off their store registry (like Bed Bath and Beyond), something off their honeymoon registry, cash or whatever you want to give them. I see nothing wrong with registering for what you want, but I also know that doesn't mean it's waht you will get!!! LOL!

DH and I already lived together before getting married but we 'upgraded' our things with the registry...meaning the cheap walmart toaster was replaced with a nicer one as was the can opener and the mismatched dishes! But that was us!

 

[tzolkin]

My best friend did this.

They had already paid for the honeymoon and were going to go anyway. I think they looked at it as a way to get cash gifts instead of objects that they would have to move. (They were moving from Atlanta to Seattle three days after they returned and were already donating a lot of the stuff they already had.) I'm sure some people thought it was tacky, but some of their family members liked that there was something that they gave as a "gift"-- a boat ride, dinner at a certain restaurant, etc. I really didn't consider whether it was tacky or not since I had intended to give them money anyway.

DH and I have yet to go on a honeymoon.
We did get mostly cash gifts (that's the norm in my family), but they went into renovating our newly purchased home.

 

[dakcp2001]

In my circle of friends this is the norm. I *think* it is the same as the gift registry you give one not to both. It is for the wedding gift, not in addition to. We are not married yet, but we have gotten a lot of these for weddings we have attended. I usually give cash anyway, I dont care if they use it for home stuff or their honeymoon. But the honeymoon registry is not a new thing amongst my group, I see them all the time.

What irritates me is the Christmas gift registry for the kids, the bachelorette registry lists that have recenlty popped up (now we do gifts for this?), and the registries in which I cannot afford a single item for whatever the occasion.

 

[We_Love_Disney]

I really wonder why people feel compelled to ask for specific items for a wedding, shower etc. I find it rather tacky.

My grandparents had all kinds of treasures around their respective homes, and they would tell stories about the items and how they got them. Some were from the wedding others were from anniversaries and other special events and the story would start with the item, then the people that gave it to them, and some silly anecdote about them. It was a fascinating history lesson into my grandparents lives. Those items and the stories were some of my best memories of my childhood. My parents did the same with us too. It is neat to see these 'adults' as young people embarking on a future and the friends that they had.

But, sure, you can have a check for $50, or some trivial item off your bed, bath and beyond registry that will have no significance or trace of the person that bought it for you. That will surely be one fun story to tell the kids and grandkids. That is why I think registries are tacky. Buy me something that you think I will like and we can make our own story.

 

[LBIJim]

I never heard of Honeymoon Registries until last night. We were at Boscov's and I starting monkeying around with the registry scanner while my wife was browsing the china/crystal department. It asked what you were registering for: shower, wedding, honeymoon, or a handful of other occasions.

I find the honeymoon registry no more tacky than shower or wedding ones. I never bought a gift from a registry list; we always give a check. The couple can use it for what they want: china, linens, tools, groceries, spending money on their honeymoon or whatever.

I don't THINK the honeymoon registry is an attempt for an additional gift; merely another choice. Now if a greedy couple EXPECTS an additional honeymoon gift, I hope they're bitterly disappointed by a lack of response.

Jim

 

[luvmy3]

I think its tacky to have a "honeymoon registry". To me a honeymoon is something that you plan according to the budget you have, not the budget you want your wedding guests to supply. I realize that a couple could just use the cash they recieve at their wedding to pay for their honeymoon, and thats fine, there is just something about asking your guests to help pay for it that seems tacky to me.

 

[MM27]

I think if a couple cannot afford to go to Hawaii on their honeymoon, perhaps they need to think about other places that are more within their budget. I would never contribute to a honeymoon and I think it's nervy for anyone to ask.