Here's what I would do.
Book HoJo (if you haven't). Mark the calendar on day BEFORE the last day you could cancel with them with no penalty, so you can be sure to cancel if you need to.
Cancel the package (FWIW, the meal package isn't actually a financial deal, you're just paying for food up front, which you can do easily by putting money aside or buying disney giftcards every so often if you have a
Disney Store nearby ALTHOUGH I wouldn't do the latter in your situation, just in case he IS laid off and you need the money).
Find out from GAT how much lead-time they need for ordering tickets. Disneyland *just* raised ticket prices, so I can't imagine you're going to have another increase until late next summer. Really check out the difference in prices between 3 and 4 days, b/c the difference isn't all that much (though multiplied by your big family it could add up).
Check out the menus for the restaurants inside the parks at allears.net, and find the websites for the restaurants outside (Coco's, Mimi's, Millie's, Quiznos, overpriced compared to other ones IHOP, and Denny's, to name a few). Get a handle on what you really might spend on food.
If you can figure out a way to save the money for this (oh by the way, disneyshopping dot com has an "outlet" area, and you CAN get some really good prices, which allows you to get souvenirs ahead of time, to pull out of a backpack when the kids get the "I wannas") for this AND save money for the "just in cases" it might really help your hubby. Vacations are so important IF you can take them.
Do you work for pay? If not, start lining up temp jobs you could apply for, if he's laid off. That way he could stay home with the kids and you could bring home the bacon. If you do work for pay already, that idea's not possible, of course.
I wish you lots of luck!!!!