Help! My Teenager wants a puppy.

[DisnyMama]

My 14 year old DS and I finally live in a house with a fenced yard that is perfect for a small dog. He has been asking for a dog since he was about 8 years old but we either lived in an apartment or a condo which was out of the question. I grew up and loved having a dog. I also know the responsibility that goes along with having a dog and that is where I have the problem. I picture me ending up having to be the one that makes sure it is fead and watered, goes out, cleans up poop, accidents on my carpet (this is one of my biggest issues), vet bills, the extra expense for boarding when we go on vacation. Those were the cons. The pros are all the warm fuzzies that a dog brings to a home. I miss that. My DS has been having issues with depression and is in therapy. His issues are all pretty much caused by his father's lack of contact. I was hoping that having a dog in the house would cause him to have to be dependable to the dog which knowing my son, he would thrive on. He takes alot of pride in doing for others. It would be a two way street where he would give affection to the dog and the dog would give right back to him. This is what I would hope for and might be of some phsycological benefit to my son. Regardless, once it is here we would fall in love with it immediatly and it would be part of our little family.

I was hoping to get some opinions if this is a good idea and if so what types of dogs would you recommend for a small house where little children will be visiting quite often. Also, that might be easy or at least a little less of a challenge to potty train. Thanks.

 

[bettyann29]

The only thing I can say is that a dog will bring something special into your home.. I have never been a "dog person".. We were not able to have a dog due to the same issues you stated.. the last house we lived in no pets were allowed so we werent able to get a dog.. we did adopt a stray cat in the neighborhood.. when we moved here my daughter who was 12 at the time wanted a dog so bad and she promised all the things that kids usually do such as taking care of the dog, feeding, taking for a walk, making sure they have water, and so on.. I knew how badly my children wanted a dog so when we moved into this house 2 yrs ago I caved in and allowed a dog.. Their dads mom took her to the humane society and she picked out a puppy.. he is half terrier and half schnauzer (however you spell it).. His name given was Mathew.. At first I wasnt real keen on the idea and at first she helped do everything but the newness wore off and guess who was taking care of him.. ME... I will say that I have fallen in love with him and he is as much a part of our family as any person that lives here.. He is the doggie love of my life.. I dont know what I will ever do if something happens to him.. It was a little trying in the beginning with the potty training but it didnt take long before he was trained.. honestly that was the worst part.. My opinion is if you realize that in the end you will be taking care of this doggie and you have no problem with that than go for it!! A dog will add so much to your life.. Its unbelievable but its true.. I cant imagine how our lives would be without him.. he is like one of my children.. He is so attached to me and follows me EVERYWHERE I go.. When I go take a bath he is sitting outside the door waiting for me.. when I am in here on the computer he is right by my side.. when Im in bed he is right there with me.. I give a thumbs up to you on this decision..

 

[debden]

Well said and very true BettyAnn!!
Debbie

 

[bekkiz]

Also, from my experiance, potty training isn't hard if you have a few days to stay home with the pup. See if you can arrange to bring him home when you have a 4-5 days off. The I highly recommend the teather method--that's where the dog is basically tied to you all day, and everytime he starts to do the potty dance, you take him out. The people who have the hardest time are the ones who only "potty train" when it is convenient for them, and in the meantime, pup has figured out he fits behind the couch and that it's a nice place to do his business!

Also, crate training is the way to go. When you've decided to get one, come back, and I'm sure we can help you through the steps!

My DH was not a huge fan of the idea of getting a dog, but withing an hour, he was in love. Indy is definatly my responsibility, but he makes me so joyful and happy, I was happy to put up with the 6 weeks of hard work

 

[The Mystery Machine]

OK, I will share my story with you...

We moved away from family in April (Missouri to Texas). I have a 14yodd & a 9yodd.

We had planned on getting 2 puppies when we moved. We got Butters and Gracie from Dog Rescue group in July. They are 11 months now.

Dogs do give alot of love. However they require training, walking and discipline. I think this is the part that my kids were "shocked" by. They did not expect this amount of work and $$$$. We have spent 4,000 so far since July. Maybe more!! AAACK! (Vets, bee stings, stuff in the eye, food, crates, training, health meds, boarding, toys, etc..)

Since your son is depressed this will have an effect on the dog. The dog will view your son as "weak". Be sure to get a breed or personality that will be able to handle this. Be very careful not to get a dominant dog. This will be very important to your son's well being.

The end result here is that depite all of the "work" we love our pups. Through learning how to walk and train the dog, my kids have gained confidence. Even younger dd.

Remember it is exercise, discipline, then affection & food. Go to Ceasar Milan site, he has a video out finally. I need to get it.
"People Training for Dogs".
You will be shocked to learn that the exercise and discipline part will be far more helpful, than the affection from the dog.
The affection is the icing on the cake.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

I also know the responsibility that goes along with having a dog and that is where I have the problem. I picture me ending up having to be the one that makes sure it is fead and watered, goes out, cleans up poop, accidents on my carpet (this is one of my biggest issues), vet bills, the extra expense for boarding when we go on vacation.

I think your son will benefit tremendously from the love of a dog.

However, I think you are right to be concerned. More than likely your son will help, but the brunt of the responsibility may in fact fall on you (these are questions all pet owners should be asking themselves before they commit to a pet so good for you). I hope you and your son can work it out between you, there is nothing like the love of a dog, especially for a depressed teen. I would recommend a beagle type dog for a first time owner (your son).

 

[christineann]

Dogs make life good. I have always had mutts from the shelter and found them to be the best. I was offered two registered black lab pups for the same price that I paid to adopt two mixed breed pups from a shelter and turned it down.

You can say any foolish thing to a dog, and the dog will give you a look that says, 'Wow, you're right! I never would've thought of that!'
- Dave Barry

Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole.
-Roger Caras


A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three
times before lying down.
-Robert Benchley

We give dogs time we can spare, space we can spare and love we can spare. And in return, dogs give us their all. It's the best deal man has ever made.
-M. Acklam

There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face.
-Ben Williams

A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves
himself.
-Josh Billings


That's why I will always have at least one dog!

 

[VSL]

I love dogs. I think that they're wonderful and lots of fun, they give lots of affection, etc.

If you're going to get one though, I really think that you should prepare yourself for the possibility of you looking after the dog, taking him/her for walks, cleaning up after him/her, etc. I'm not saying that this will be true for your son, but so many children grow out of the novelty fairly quickly and enjoy playing with the dog but know that, even if they don't look after it, you will.

Not trying to put you off, just think that you should prepare - getting a dog is a 10-15+ year commitment. They are adorable and lovely, but think it through first.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

More than likely your son will help, but the brunt of the responsibility may in fact fall on you (these are questions all pet owners should be asking themselves before they commit to a pet so good for you).

Very true. I have a 14yodd that I woke up at 10am this morning to go and clean off the muddy paws to let the dogs in.
Now she is showering and then we are going to take them dog walking and training.

Owning a dog will involve you and your son together. It really is a whole family committment.

I would prefer you to view this as more of a sharing responsibility approach with your son. Caring for puppies takes alot of energy.
I think it is like babies. You forget all the work and only remember the cuteness.

 

[tw1nsmom]

Crate training is definitely the way to go. When it comes to the type of dog, we've always had mutts from the pound. If you are going to buy an actual breed, I would go with one that doesn't shed. They're cross breeding poodles with other dogs like labs and spaniels. I'll be looking for one of those if anything happens to our Chip. I love our dog dearly, but if I could change one thing it would be the shedding. No matter how much I clean, there seems to be dog hair everywhere!

 

[beckmrk04]

I have a dog and a big reason my dh and I decided to get her was because of my depression. Last year I was going through a really rough patch and finishing school, newly married, had just bought a house to fix up, and I was overwhelmed and became really depressed. I had ALWAYS had a dog growing up, but we didn't have the space until we moved into our house. Then, with school and work, I didn't have time. SO, on the day I would have walked in my graduation ceremony, I went and got my puppy Jules. (OT- I know- people think I'm crazy for skipping it- but I hated that school and felt no attachment).
She helped me so much!! The best thing about dogs is that no matter what kind of person you've been today, to them you are the greatest human being on the planet, and they will always let you know it.

THAT said, she is a ton of work. Last night, in fact, she deemed it perfectly ok to pee on my bed. WHY?! I have no idea. She is a year old and potty trained. I would also make sure that you are willing to look after the dog once your son moves out, goes to college, etc. Chances are, he won't be taking it along. Finally, gear yourself up to do all of the work for the dog. Just in case. Ifyour son does it- great. But it isn't fair to a dog to get one, then get rid of it because your son isn't taking care of it. You have to want to too.

I would also suggest picking out the puppy together, one that you BOTH fall in love with. Try the website www.dogbreedinfo.com

 

[The Mystery Machine]

Here is the troublemaker Butters...(he is sweet, but he is part shepherd/lab/retriever) He eats like a pig and likes to chew. He also has some fear issues we are working with. Here he is after digging under the chicken wire to keep him out of chewing on the tree and eating the mulch.

Here is the perfect, cute and full of personality Gracie...She loves everyone, is 36lbs, perfect for your family...but you can't have her. Lots of people ask.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

TMM, your dogs are adorable.

beckmrk04, I agree a dog can definitely lift one's spirits. My current dog will be 2yo in April. My family got her for me while I was still in the midst of a difficult year of cancer treatment. I had just lost one of my beloved dogs and the other, her brother, was 13 and could only walk with the help of a wheeled cart and we knew we'd be losing him, too. Talk about down.

This dog was tons of work and there were times I wondered if I was crazy to take on a puppy at that point, but as my wise family knew would happen, she truly helped me recover both physically and emotionally. We lost our other dog shortly afterward and thankfully I had this dog to cushion the blow. I love her to pieces. We just got home after a 10 day trip last night and she hasn't left my side or stopped kissing me. LOL, I missed her so much while we were gone.

 

[chyam]

I know you said you were looking into a small dog.........but please consider a small retired racing greyhound. They are already crate trained when you get them, they walk wonderfully on a leash and have had alot of contact with many people during their racing days. You can usually adopt one as young as 2. These dogs also shed very little. They are also very lovable. And really when you get them they are pretty well potty trained, well they are but they need to get on your schedule. I think with a greyhound you wouldn't have to put in alot of training issues like crate training etc. They are also quite quiet. At least check them out....one site is greytalk.com

 

[The Mystery Machine]

Our Petsmart has dog fairs every weekend, from the Humane Society, Rescue Groups, and the Greyhounds are there too. Check them out and do lots of chatting!!! You can learn alot.

We went a couple of weeks ago, my dd volunteered with a Rescue Group, and the Greyhounds had on a very cool collar, a soft choker collar.
I know it is for their necks but she said anyone can use them for their dogs.

Anyone ever use them? They are called Martingale collars or aka greyhound collars?

 

[bettyann29]

TMM... your doggies are adorable!

 

[nliedel]

I would consider a shelter dog that is older. You will not have to train a dog like that and your son will be saving a life. There are wonderful rescues too for all sorts of dogs, every breed you can possibly think of (we are the loving pets of a Siberian Husky and she rules the roost but I would never suggest that for a first dog to ANYONE! Bless her sneaky, furry heart). I love the Greyhound idea. They are the best dogs! So very gentle and loving. By the time they get through the foster system a lot of "negative" behaviors (pooping on the carpet etc) are gone. We really considered a greyhound before we got our Mani-Nana but I need a dog that can run with me long distance and while a greyhound is a fast runner they are not built for marathons.

 

[horseshowmom]

I've heard nothing but good things from folks who have gone the greyhound route.

Also, one of ours is an adopted Chihuahua. He's not the small type even though he is registered. He weighs about 10 lbs., and he's wonderful. People are constantly wanting to play with him (DD's former BF begged us for him when we got him). He's big enough to really play with without having to be really careful (our other Chihuahua was only 5 lbs., and we felt like we had to be really careful with her).

We got him though a pet adoption organization from an elderly lady who couldn't keep him anymore. He was only 2 (we've had him for a year) but didn't have any idea what to do with toys (he sure does now!).

You might also take a look at petfinder.com for pets in your area.

 

[Tuffcookie]

DisnyMama, I sent you a pm.

TC

 

[Taylor]

Dogs are great, but can be a good deal of work also. Just be prepared for that. Maybe you could house sit Brutus for a week or so?