Help: My spouse will not stop overspending!

[Lil_Tink]

#1 He makes no mention of children and his posts do not reflect children.

#2 He is also 49 and if he *did* have children the issue of splitting them up is not relevant because the kids would be in college.

That doesnt mean that they would be in college, when my parents are that age my brother wont be in collage. I will just be starting.

 

[Lil_Tink]

I am so confused. On the thanksgiving thread you said that no kids were INVOLVED, I didn't take it as you didn't have any, I took it as she wasn't going to take the kids with her. I may have taken that wrong. Now you are saying that they will live in a broken family, well...yeah. but why would you divorce someone you loved over MONEY? seems pety to me. BOTH of you need to go to marriage counseling, you for having issues with her family, her for having a spending problem.
Now I could be totally out of left field on this one, if I am PLEASE tell me.

Nope. Good advice.


I think that you should GET COUNSELING and talk to her, Talking to people here isnt getting you any farther. Talk to her. .

( BUT I LOVE YOU ALL.. Wooo... )

 

[Lil_Tink]

What a great board. This is really the kid Lil_Tink Babysits, Im only 1 but have a very gifted typing and spelling skills.

 

[Lyn5]

 

[eeyore kelly]

Who let out the troll out of the cage? Will someone please catch he/ she/ it/ they/ questioner/conversationist and please lock he/ she/ it/ they/ questioner/ conversationist back up again.

 

[daddydisneyworld]

go in her wallet. take out the cards, & cut them up. She can re-order them, & you can cut them up, again.

 

[KathyTX]

If a poster annoys you or you believe them to be a troll, please just do not respond to their posts.

The OP has broken no posting guidelines here, but some of the responses are pretty harsh and border on personal attacks.

Let's all be respectful in our responses to each other. If you can't say something nice... you know the rest.

 

[Papa Deuce]

#1 He makes no mention of children and his posts do not reflect children.

#2 He is also 49 and if he *did* have children the issue of splitting them up is not relevant because the kids would be in college.

While I am no fan of Q, and he /she is not one of me, I can say when I am 49, my kids will be 10.

 

[pattyT]

By the way this is my cousins, husbands, sisters sister-in-law's nieces friend.

 

[Stepht5]

#1 He makes no mention of children and his posts do not reflect children.

#2 He is also 49 and if he *did* have children the issue of splitting them up is not relevant because the kids would be in college.

uuummmm his profile says his birth year is 1962... same as mine... and I'm only 43.....
And when I'm 49 our youngest will be 10. And our oldest will be 31. And they are from the same marriage!

 

[CarolA]

Honestly, I have a hard time believing this is a serious thread. If what you say is true, please get yourself counseling. You obviously have issues that are way over your head.

I would like to believe it's a serious thread, but the OP has proven in the past that all he does is stir up trouble and now he would like help???? Sorry, but I find it unlikely that a person like that is actually willing to do what is really necessary. Drama seems to be his friend...

I talk to my wife about this and she will not admit that this overspending is an issue. She says, "life is short, I need to enjoy it". Without admitting a problem-- no change is possible.

Any advice?

Hmm..

FROM THE OP:

I think the spending is a power thing on her part. She basically says WHAT CAN YOU DO ABOUT IT? If I divorce her:

I will have to divide up our assets
Will have to pay for an apartment and rental house just for myself
The kids will live in a broken family

She is controlling the situation because she knows there is little I can do. She refuses counseling and likes conflict.

Well, if she has really spent as much as you say are there any assests?? By the way why do you need a house and an apt? (And as to liking conflict? LOOK IN THE MIRROR!! )

And as to letting you Brother use your ID..... Do you give him your bank account also?

 

[disneymom3]

Well, assuming the thread is serious, I agree with Sparks that divorce is pretty harsh if your only problem is her and money. However you also say she is using it to control you and her family doesn't like you. (Oh wait, now I am getting confused.) Anyway, I know the control thing was on this thread, so that does not speak well of your marriage. As for splitting the assets, I am guessing you meant the debts. Think of it this way, if that is all that is keeping you there, three years from now, are you going to be further in debt or less?

 

[C.Ann]

You might want to go out amongst the general public and "take a poll" in regards to this.. Aim for about 1,011 people and whatever the majority say, there's your answer!!

 

[mickeyfan2]

You might want to go out amongst the general public and "take a poll" in regards to this.. Aim for about 1,011 people and whatever the majority say, there's your answer!!

Maybe Q could stand in front of Wal-Mart and ask each person leaving, "So how poor are you?".