help me figure out dd (like THATS possible!)

[dismom2]

Sit down with her and watch her/guide her while she does her homework. I promise you, she will do better with you by her side.

Then, do some fun things with her. Do it with her. Any time I start noticing anything possibly bothering my kids, spending more time with them, especially one on one, helps a lot. You can get kids to open up more this way, as well. Just keep it casual and upbeat. Quality time is more valuable than anything.
Kids don't just need friends, but they need time with mom/dad too. Quality time. Fun times. Read to her. Play games. Cook. Laugh. Have fun. Let her know she doesn't have to be perfect, and you love her unconditionally. They need to hear it. Good luck.

 

[powellrj]

I'd hate to send her out on sports team where she'd be totally embarrased 'cause she is nowhere in the caliber of the other girls.

If all of her friends are doing it, I wouldn't worry too much about it. My DD started a new school this year and had never picked up a golf club. When we went to sign-up the office gal asked if she wanted to be on the golf team. I said she had never played before and she said that was fine.

I signed her up, the coach called the day before the first practice and once again I said she had never played before and he said that was fine. I bought her clubs and sent her off to a new school with new clubs where she didn't know a soul.

She was the worst player on the team, but she had such a great time it didn't matter. They had their awards program last night and they teased her about how bad she was when she started but how much better she is now. She can't wait to play next year, where we hope she isn't the worst player on the team, but she made lots of good friends in a place were 9 weeks ago she didn't know anyone.

I guess my point is, if she wants to play, who cares if she isn't the best player, if she enjoys it and learns a new sport, thats whats important!

 

[okeydokey]

I was thinking 4-H as well. IF she doesn't like animal 4-H offers many non animal things as well. My oldest has done a national trip to DC with 4-H and is heading to Atlanta in Nov with 4-H. She also went to North Dakota in the summer with 4-H

I am a 4-H leader and I run an arts and crafts club. My kids have also done gardening, bow and arrow and outdoors clubs. There is something for most everyone and our dues are $12 for the year for as many clubs as you want to join so it's pretty affordable.

My DD went to 4-H overnight camp last year and loved it.

 

[golfgal]

If all of her friends are doing it, I wouldn't worry too much about it. My DD started a new school this year and had never picked up a golf club. When we went to sign-up the office gal asked if she wanted to be on the golf team. I said she had never played before and she said that was fine.

I signed her up, the coach called the day before the first practice and once again I said she had never played before and he said that was fine. I bought her clubs and sent her off to a new school with new clubs where she didn't know a soul.

She was the worst player on the team, but she had such a great time it didn't matter. They had their awards program last night and they teased her about how bad she was when she started but how much better she is now. She can't wait to play next year, where we hope she isn't the worst player on the team, but she made lots of good friends in a place were 9 weeks ago she didn't know anyone.

I guess my point is, if she wants to play, who cares if she isn't the best player, if she enjoys it and learns a new sport, thats whats important!

I hope she keeps up with it. It's a GREAT sport for everyone. It is a sport where everyone can play and it doesn't matter what you shoot, just go out and have fun. We had a woman at our old golf course that would play 18 holes 4 days/week (72 holes of golf), walked all but 18 of those holes at age 98 .

 

[TLuvsD]

It's possible your daughter doesn't actually know how to study effectively. If she's gifted/very smart, she may just be hitting the point where she needs the study skills other students have been using for years. Looking at the pages is not studying. Try working with her, in a positive way, to see what works for her. Remember everyone learns a little differently, so what works for you may not be best for her.
And follow up on the depression. If you are accustomed to doing well, and all of a sudden what you have been doing doesn't work anymore, your parents aren't too happy with you, your friend is skipped ahead in band and you don't feel like you have any "special talent", well that could be depressing. Follow up with the appropriate people, and keep looking for ways to develop her unique abilities, and her self confidence. In my book, that takes actual doing.....
For what it's worth, there was a period of time when D was dragging cupcakes to school constantly. Loved baking, loved decorating, doesn't want to eat them. And there are only 3 of us. Is there a home ec class? Some afterschool, or not at school baking/cooking program? She needs a place to shine.

 

[NHdisneylover]

It's possible your daughter doesn't actually know how to study effectively. If she's gifted/very smart, she may just be hitting the point where she needs the study skills other students have been using for years. Looking at the pages is not studying. Try working with her, in a positive way, to see what works for her. Remember everyone learns a little differently, so what works for you may not be best for her.
And follow up on the depression. If you are accustomed to doing well, and all of a sudden what you have been doing doesn't work anymore, your parents aren't too happy with you, your friend is skipped ahead in band and you don't feel like you have any "special talent", well that could be depressing. Follow up with the appropriate people, and keep looking for ways to develop her unique abilities, and her self confidence. In my book, that takes actual doing.....
For what it's worth, there was a period of time when D was dragging cupcakes to school constantly. Loved baking, loved decorating, doesn't want to eat them. And there are only 3 of us. Is there a home ec class? Some afterschool, or not at school baking/cooking program? She needs a place to shine.

This is an excellent post over all and I highlighted a key point there at the end too