Help! Infant Son HATES riding in the car.

[ClarabelleCowFan]

My 12 week old son Mason absolutely can not stand to ride in the car. He was originally in an infant car seat with the snap in base and we switched him to a Britax Roundabout and he hates both of them. Whether we are in the car for 2 miles to the grocery store or the 70 miles up to the airport in Philly - he screams and screams until we take him out of the seat.

We have gone over the seat and nothing is poking him. We have a shade on the window so the sun isnt in his eyes. We have the vent pointed so it doesnt blow directly on him and keep a blanket on his legs when we do run the a/c so he doesnt get too cold. We went out and bought a Baby Einstein musical light show for the seat and that keeps him quiet for about the first 5 minutes of the ride then he starts wailing again.

The poor guy is miserable and making the rest of us miserable too.

We are supposed to drive to NYC for my baby sister's wedding in 3 weeks - 3 hours each way. Just the thought of the car ride is making me cringe.

Any thoughts or suggestions? Could he be getting car sick at this age?

 

[rrobin3051]

ohhhh...thats a tough one...there are some babies who just dont enjoy the car. I know Morgan who is 2 now didnt the first6-8 weeks. Then he got better and now does fine if nobody is in the backseat with him. The only thing Morgan liked was the radio. It had to be kiss fm..lol and i am not kidding on that one. Im sorry and hopefully he starts to outgrow it. I know I thought the same of Morgan, what newborn doesnt like car rides or stroller rides. I later realised the hated being on his back. He slept on his tummy and that is the only way he wanted to be. He hated swing, stroller(it didnt lay back all the way) and car rides. Like I said around 2 months or so he started tolerating the car rides better. Sorry I dont have any real good advice for you. Keeping my fingers crossed he does better for you in three weeks.

 

[stacy6552]

I'd call the pediatrition and get him checked out. Does he sit in the postion at home ok? With the carrier carseat, would he be ok in it outside the car? If he's fine in the seat itself when its not in the car, then, in addition to calling the DR, I would put a picture of a face on the seat back, maybe that would be reassuring. When my Mason was a baby (13 years ago urgg) they even had mirrors that you could rig to double reflect his face and your's.

 

[susykt4]

Ugh. My daughter was the same way! It was HORRIBLE to ride in the car with her. I wish I could remember how long it lasted, but I think it was only about her first 6-9 months. She has never been carsick and didn't have any problems with the position, she just screamed in her carseat.

We, too, used music. She liked the Wee Sing children's music. We bought it at Barnes and Noble. She especially liked when we sang along with it. That unfortunately lasted ~three years. For her not just any music would do! It could NOT be MY radio station- it HAD to be the crappy kiddie tapes.

Good luck! Most people's babies LOVE the car and they DO NOT understand car-hating babies! If you've already tried music, try different kinds. Listening to "Where is Thumbkin?" over and over really IS better than listening to your kid scream in the car!

 

[Mouse House Mama]

I have been there. It is not fun. Not all of my kids liked the carseat. We use Britax seats too but it didn't matter to my oldest son. He would scream like we were sticking him with pins. It was torture if I had to travel for more than 5 minutes. I would end up crying myself. He hated to stroller too. I was so tired of people telling me to just put him in the car and he will sleep so we could go to some event a million miles away. Yeah right. These were always the same people who didn't have to use carseats when their kids were younger. I don't have any advice except to make sure the baby is fed, burped, and changed right before you go. It may buy you a few minutes. I am sending you hugs I know how stressful this is.

 

[brentm3]

I think you've received some good advice on checking for a medical situation first. A colicy (sp?) kid is probably pretty uncomfortable being bent like that. We used to buy Mylicon by the gallon for our daughter.

If all of that checks out, you may consider investing in a headrest-mountable DVD player for your car.

We did this when the kids were younger to keep them quieter on long rides, but then we encountered a new problem...fighting to get them out of the car. Ugh!

 

[NemoMOm]

My DS hated his car seat and still does only he tolerates it better now. He screamed until about 6 mos. Everyone told me how their child loved the car, not mine lol. And he never fell asleep, even now it's rare. Try getting a cd of kids music and even singing along it helped with DS. Good Luck. They do grow out of it.

 

[Nicolepa]

My son would scream bloody murder whenever we buckled him in his carseat. At his 2 month checkup we found that he had a hernia. He had an operation the next day and the ride home from the hospital was the first quiet ride we'd ever had, even w/the stitches etc.

 

[Alva218]

I empathize. I'm going through the same thing with my six-month old son. He's teething, and I've noticed considerable improvement when he has a teething toy to chew on. If your baby is drooling, maybe he's teething...

Good luck!

 

[kokotg]

My third baby was like this. Every single time we got in the car, he would scream and nothing would make him happy. Even if there were two adults in the car so that one could sit in the back right next to him, he'd still cry. If I was really lucky, he'd give me 10 minutes before he got started so that I could get halfway to a friend's house or wherever before the misery set in. And he never, ever fell asleep in the car. Then it abruptly stopped when he was 5 months old. He's been a perfectly fine passenger ever since.

Does he take a pacifier? If not, you might want to try introducing one (even if only for car rides). My DS wouldn't take one, but not for lack of trying on my part!

 

[MSSANDRA]

I was going to suggest having someone sit beside his as much as possible. Just a hand on him might help. I would also try putting him a sitting position inside for short times in a bouncy chair to try to adjust him to the sitting position. Perhaps time his bottle if he is bottle fed to be given in the car?? Avoid his most fussy times in the car???? If you are the only one in the car, try talking or singing before he starts fussing to reasure him you are there. Our DB really does not like ridding in the car but is ok as long as someone sits beside him. When there is just me I sing to him the whole time

Prayers for better travel!!

 

[fun4disney]

My 12 week old son Mason absolutely can not stand to ride in the car. He was originally in an infant car seat with the snap in base and we switched him to a Britax Roundabout and he hates both of them. Whether we are in the car for 2 miles to the grocery store or the 70 miles up to the airport in Philly - he screams and screams until we take him out of the seat.

We have gone over the seat and nothing is poking him. We have a shade on the window so the sun isnt in his eyes. We have the vent pointed so it doesnt blow directly on him and keep a blanket on his legs when we do run the a/c so he doesnt get too cold. We went out and bought a Baby Einstein musical light show for the seat and that keeps him quiet for about the first 5 minutes of the ride then he starts wailing again.

The poor guy is miserable and making the rest of us miserable too.

We are supposed to drive to NYC for my baby sister's wedding in 3 weeks - 3 hours each way. Just the thought of the car ride is making me cringe.

Any thoughts or suggestions? Could he be getting car sick at this age?

I know, I know, what I am about to say is about a dog, not a child, but I think it still applies......

We had a puupy. He was horrible! to say the least. He HATED to be picked up (Try telling a 3 year old not to do that!) and would bite....He never bit my DS, but I was afraid that someday he might (no, he's not a pit bull or anything like that) so I asked the vet what we could do. She said if he doesn't like to be held, then hold him 100 times a day. he will get used to it.

I would think if you just put your child in the car seat and drove around, even just a block or 2 to start, then after awhile, he'll get used to it.

I don't suggest putting him in it and driving 10 hours, the poor thing shouldn't be tortured, but he does need to get used to being in the seat.

Good Luck and I hope it gets better soon!

 

[happypooh]

Our DS hated the decathalon..preferred his graco so we went and got a graco convertible and he much preferred that - I think it was the angle on the decathalon/marathon. Our DD is ok in the car seat but thinks that when she is in the car we are trying to get her to sleep so if she's not tired she gets upset and cries...but if we sing itsy bitsy spider (with hand motions of course) she is fine (same as her brother at the same age!)...remember this time too will pass. Try and stay calm and get a pacifier that they like.

 

[darlak]

No advice here, just sympathy. My 4th child hated riding in the car. She started screaming the minute we buckled her into the car seat. We just eventually learned to endure it...sort of. By the end of any unavoidable long car trip, the rest of the family was usually dazed and exhausted. She, on the other hand, was completely happy just as soon as we got her out of the car. I always felt somehow slightly guilty, like it was my fault that I couldn't sooth her. I used to be amazed that she didn't eventually just fall asleep from exhaustion. She finally outgrew it....when she was about 2!

Good luck! One day, you'll kid him about this.

 

[NotUrsula]

Being that he's a summer baby, being too hot seems more likely than being too cold. Have you tried windows up vs. windows down, and lifted the back of the canopy so that the a/c can reach his head? Does having someone ride in the back w/ him help or hurt?

Have you tried putting him in the infant carseat in other situations? Try the old colic standby: buckle him into the seat and give him a ride on the clothes dryer. If he'll tolerate that I don't think it is the seat itself, but something about the car or the motion. My DS used to hate lying on his back in the open air; the vista of nothing but sky seemed to make him think he was falling.

 

[2goofykids]

I feel your pain. Both of my kids hated the car. With ds we could drive about 20-30 minutes before he would start crying and I had to sit in the back with him. Once we turned him around (forward facing) he was fine. Once we visited my inlaws, who were 4.5 hours away, ds cried the entire trip home. And he did not fall asleep even with all the crying. My dd was much worse. She cried from the moment we put her in the car until we took her out. I sat next to her, but it didn't help. We just stopped going too many places because it was so stressful. She did have reflux, but I'm not sure if that had anything to do with it because she continued to do it even after we had her on zantac and when the reflux went away. She continued to cry until she was forward facing and able to watch a disney princess sing-a-long dvd. We had to have those on every second in the car for a few months. Now she is pretty happy in the car, she's 22 months.
It is an awful feeling and most people do not understand and can't begin to comprehend what it is like. I'm not even sure my family believed me until they heard dd on the other end of the cell phone screaming. And she screamed to the point she would gag herself. We tried music and her pacifer, but nothing helped until the dvds. I wish I had some advice for you, but all I can offer is sympathy. Good luck!

 

[Mouse House Mama]

I feel your pain. Both of my kids hated the car. With ds we could drive about 20-30 minutes before he would start crying and I had to sit in the back with him. Once we turned him around (forward facing) he was fine. Once we visited my inlaws, who were 4.5 hours away, ds cried the entire trip home. And he did not fall asleep even with all the crying. My dd was much worse. She cried from the moment we put her in the car until we took her out. I sat next to her, but it didn't help. We just stopped going too many places because it was so stressful. She did have reflux, but I'm not sure if that had anything to do with it because she continued to do it even after we had her on zantac and when the reflux went away. She continued to cry until she was forward facing and able to watch a disney princess sing-a-long dvd. We had to have those on every second in the car for a few months. Now she is pretty happy in the car, she's 22 months.
It is an awful feeling and most people do not understand and can't begin to comprehend what it is like. I'm not even sure my family believed me until they heard dd on the other end of the cell phone screaming. And she screamed to the point she would gag herself. We tried music and her pacifer, but nothing helped until the dvds. I wish I had some advice for you, but all I can offer is sympathy. Good luck!

Oh yes, the old scream until you vomit. Been there more times than I care to remember. I can also sympathize with nobody believing you. Some people just assume that all babies will sleep in the car or cry themselves out. Yeah right!!!!

 

[ClarabelleCowFan]

Thanks so much for all the replies.

We will try anything at this point. I have seen those DVD players that strap to the headrests at Target that we could use while he is rear-facing - will have to try that! We do have a built-in system in the truck but the screens were ripped out last week and stolen by some neighborhood kids (idiots left the DVD player, the radar detector though).

DS will sit in his bouncy chair at home with no problems and coo to the bird on his toy bar. We did try sitting him more upright in the car seat but that didn't seem to help. One of my 2 DDs is always in the backseat with him and sometimes he can be soothed by holding their hand but not usually.

He will scream and scream until he chokes himself and at times he lets out piercing screams like he is in pain. We have realized that if he is wet he screams (he does that even when not in the car seat too) so we make sure to change him before we get in the car. We even had extensive workups done to check for kidney issues since those do run in our family and could cause him back pain but all the tests have come back normal (thankfully).

We ran errands today - all within 3 miles of our house - and sure enough he fussed and fussed a good bit in the car. Sigh.

We just moved to MD and are within a short drive of so many places we want to take day trips to (Washington DC, Baltimore, Philly, Hersheypark, etc...) but with DS like this I don't even want to venture out to Target or the grocery store let alone drive an hour or 2 to go somewhere fun.

 

[MinnieGi]

My DD was like that too!!! Hated the car! She was my first and of course all I had ever heard was how much the car soothes a baby...HA! Not my baby!!! I lived in a very convenient area close to shopping etc... and even a two minute ride to the grocery store brought piercing screams! My DD also liked to be held constantly and we think she screamed b/c I was not holding her. However we were never really sure. All I can tell you is hang in there it will pass...eventually. DD did eventually stop crying in the car. I can't remember exactly when but maybe around the 4 - 6 month mark. I know for a while I used to just walk to the grocery store pushing her stroller and buy just enough to fit in the stroller. She was fine in the stroller and we used a travel system so she was in the SAME car seat that snapped from stroller to car!!

Good luck!!

 

[tonilea]

I think it is just a stage. For DS it lasted from around three months to about five months. A pacifier helped. It is terrible. But, this too shall pass. Now DS is an awesome traveler!