Help! I'm lost in th DFTW world. Any advice appreciated.

[mrsg00fy]

I'll address only the last question....

I would not be happy if my husband planned something like this for me.I'm a planner.....and would want to be part of making the decisions.

I would not like the surprise element of it.....I would not be happy about the high cost not being a joint decision and I also would be upset at being left out of the planning.

That said, you know your spouse the best.....I'm just throwing out a different opinion.

 

[LittleMissMagic]

When I read about your plans, I was thinking what about the dress? However, I think you have a great idea with taking a dress that fits her well into the store. You sound like you pay great attention to detail, so I'm willing to bet that you have a great idea of her tastes and what looks best on her.

Your entire plan sounds so romantic!

Don't forget about the kids, though! Are you going to get a little dress for DD? And an outfit for DS?

Also, if you want to surprise her but still give her some say in the matter, I like what someone suggested earlier about taking her to Franck's for a planning session. That way, it will be a great surprise for her, but she'll still get to plan out the day.

I'm sure whatever way you do it, she will be very surprised and very grateful!

 

[cmugica]

First of all, thanks again to all those that offered thoughts and comments. I'm now certain that I'm going to go through with the surprise. I've already called DFTW and I'm supposed to hear back tomorrow from a coordinator.

I considered an Escape package, but her only sister has already told me she can't come. If her sister (& brother in law) don't come, her parents won't come. Then, I think the Escape wedding might actually bum her out. So, I'm doing a quaint little Memories wedding with our two kids, my Mom, and us.

How to pull it off the surprise? Well, it's still going to be tough. The biggest concern that you all have raised is the dress. I'm thinking of Luau Cove because (1) beach weddings seem cool; (2) getting the kids outfitted seems much simpler; and (3) I can buy a beautiful beach wedding gown with less difficulty than a traditional one.

So, here's what I have put in motion: My wife and I were trying to figure out where we might want to eat (got to get those 180 ADRs set...) and I told her to leave Saturday and Sunday afternoon open during our trip. When she asked Why?, I told her that it's because I had planned a surprise photo session for her birthday. I even showed her the Disney Photo website ( disneyeventphotography.com ).

The photo ruse helped solve a lot of the problems, e.g.:
1) now I have an excuse to block off the time;
2) now she'll also want to be prompt to the appointment;
3) there won't be anything suspicious about getting the family "picture-ready" and she won't kill me for showing up without first warning her that she'd be photographed;
3) she's already looking for a dress that would be appropriate for a beach photoshoot. The Disney photo website reflects that the families should wear white and she's been pestering me for years to have a family portrait with the girls in white dresses and the boys in white shirts & khakis.
4) if her dress seems too informal, I'll just bring a backup dress for her and let her in that morning. (I'll take her favorite-fitting dress & her best friend shopping with me)

I haven't made up my mind, but I am actually now considering waiting until she gets to Luau Cove to let her in on the surprise. It seems like it would be pretty cool if I leave our resort early with the kids ("Honey, we're going to get there early to meet the photographer while you finish getting ready"). That way, when she arrives on the monorail (we're staying at the BLT), the photographer and his "assistant" (aka the coordinator) could greet her and escort her to the beach. By the time she realizes what's happening, the violinist will be playing When You Wish Upon a Star.

It will either be incredibly awesome or she's going to throw me into Bay Lake. Either way, it will make for good pictures.

Now, on to figuring out a cake. That board is even more intimidating than this one.....

 

[lurkyloo]

Sounds like the planning is going well!

The massive Cake Thread on the Restaurants Board can be intimidating, and it's hard to find the info you want, so I made up this cheat sheet with all the prices, phone numbers, etc.:

http://disneytravelbabble.com/how-to/order-cake/by-location/

Just find the resort where you want the cake delivered (either to a room or a restaurant) and call the number listed. There's also a tutorial that will give you an idea of what can be delivered where—for example, if you want a fancy, fondant-covered cake delivered to the Poly, you actually have to call the Grand Floridian. That info is all here:

http://disneytravelbabble.com/how-to/order-cake/

Happy planning!

 

[erin.w]

How exciting!!! Can't wait to follow along!

 

[leonix8238]

First of all, thanks again to all those that offered thoughts and comments. I'm now certain that I'm going to go through with the surprise. I've already called DFTW and I'm supposed to hear back tomorrow from a coordinator.

I considered an Escape package, but her only sister has already told me she can't come. If her sister (& brother in law) don't come, her parents won't come. Then, I think the Escape wedding might actually bum her out. So, I'm doing a quaint little Memories wedding with our two kids, my Mom, and us.

How to pull it off the surprise? Well, it's still going to be tough. The biggest concern that you all have raised is the dress. I'm thinking of Luau Cove because (1) beach weddings seem cool; (2) getting the kids outfitted seems much simpler; and (3) I can buy a beautiful beach wedding gown with less difficulty than a traditional one.

So, here's what I have put in motion: My wife and I were trying to figure out where we might want to eat (got to get those 180 ADRs set...) and I told her to leave Saturday and Sunday afternoon open during our trip. When she asked Why?, I told her that it's because I had planned a surprise photo session for her birthday. I even showed her the Disney Photo website ( disneyeventphotography.com ).

The photo ruse helped solve a lot of the problems, e.g.:
1) now I have an excuse to block off the time;
2) now she'll also want to be prompt to the appointment;
3) there won't be anything suspicious about getting the family "picture-ready" and she won't kill me for showing up without first warning her that she'd be photographed;
3) she's already looking for a dress that would be appropriate for a beach photoshoot. The Disney photo website reflects that the families should wear white and she's been pestering me for years to have a family portrait with the girls in white dresses and the boys in white shirts & khakis.
4) if her dress seems too informal, I'll just bring a backup dress for her and let her in that morning. (I'll take her favorite-fitting dress & her best friend shopping with me)

I haven't made up my mind, but I am actually now considering waiting until she gets to Luau Cove to let her in on the surprise. It seems like it would be pretty cool if I leave our resort early with the kids ("Honey, we're going to get there early to meet the photographer while you finish getting ready"). That way, when she arrives on the monorail (we're staying at the BLT), the photographer and his "assistant" (aka the coordinator) could greet her and escort her to the beach. By the time she realizes what's happening, the violinist will be playing When You Wish Upon a Star.

It will either be incredibly awesome or she's going to throw me into Bay Lake. Either way, it will make for good pictures.

Now, on to figuring out a cake. That board is even more intimidating than this one.....

Your plans sound just wonderful.

I'll be honest, at first I thought if it were me I wouldn't like the surprise. However, you seem to have a great plan in place and are thinking about all the little details that us ladies tend to fuss over. So I have to admit I've changed my mind and think it's a fantastic idea!

Is there any way you could offer your wife a hair and make up session too? Say it's an extra treat for her or something? I'm not sure how your wife is with hair and make up but I know if it was me I'd want someone else to do it as I'm rubbish, ha ha!

Good luck with it all, I can't wait to hear how it all goes!

 

[Chilly]

I think its a wonderful idea and you seem to have all the bases covered.

One idea I did have though is that you said your wife loved the WP. You could ask your planner if there are any weddings on that day and if not perhaps you could pop in there for a couple of photos?

 

[cmugica]

I didn't want to start a new thread and figured since this group has been so helpful, I'd come back with another question.

The planning is going well. DW thinks we're taking pictures and she's excited about the idea. I've pretty much figured out roles for everyone. DS9 will escort her down to the front. DD6 will be a flowergirl and possible MOH.

Fortunately, we've got some companions on the trip to help wrangle the kids before & during the ceremony (which DW thinks is just a photoshoot). Those guests are my Mom and DW's best friend for 20+ years.

I'm considering asking one of them to get ordained to perform the service to add to their participation. Thoughts?

I don't mind paying for a minister, but thought it might be really special and memorable to have either one of these folks actually do the ceremony. But I don't want to lessen or cheapen the experience. Again, I'm aiming for the best VR possible.

So.....what does the group say? Hire a real (but unfamiliar) minister so it feels legit or get Mom or BFF ordained to have a less serious, but more memorable event?

 

[kharmagirl]

I didn't want to start a new thread and figured since this group has been so helpful, I'd come back with another question.

The planning is going well. DW thinks we're taking pictures and she's excited about the idea. I've pretty much figured out roles for everyone. DS9 will escort her down to the front. DD6 will be a flowergirl and possible MOH.

Fortunately, we've got some companions on the trip to help wrangle the kids before & during the ceremony (which DW thinks is just a photoshoot). Those guests are my Mom and DW's best friend for 20+ years.

I'm considering asking one of them to get ordained to perform the service to add to their participation. Thoughts?

I don't mind paying for a minister, but thought it might be really special and memorable to have either one of these folks actually do the ceremony. But I don't want to lessen or cheapen the experience. Again, I'm aiming for the best VR possible.

So.....what does the group say? Hire a real (but unfamiliar) minister so it feels legit or get Mom or BFF ordained to have a less serious, but more memorable event?

I don't think having someone you know and love perform the ceremony will lessen or cheapen the experience at all. We are having our two closest friends do our ceremony and we couldn't be happier. They are excited about doing the ceremony as well. To me it will be much more meaningful to have people who know and love us to perform the ceremony. I get to write the ceremony with my girlfriend who is performing it and we can put in all of the elements we want and leave out those we don't. I love the idea that 30 years from now I'll still know and love the people who initiated our married life. Of course, we are not religious and are not looking for a representative from a church so this made the most sense for us. I say do whatever makes you happiest.

 

[FoodLover]

I'm considering asking one of them to get ordained to perform the service to add to their participation. Thoughts?

I don't mind paying for a minister, but thought it might be really special and memorable to have either one of these folks actually do the ceremony. But I don't want to lessen or cheapen the experience. Again, I'm aiming for the best VR possible.

So.....what does the group say? Hire a real (but unfamiliar) minister so it feels legit or get Mom or BFF ordained to have a less serious, but more memorable event?

Since a vow renewal is not a wedding (therefore not legally binding) your officiant doesn't need to be ordained. You can pick anyone you like to do your ceremony and they can just show up and do it.

However, if you use your own officiant, that person does count in your guest count. If you use someone from Disney's list, the officiant doesn't count.

We used a friend as our officiant for our real wedding (she got ordained for the day) and I'm so glad we did. She did a wonderful, personal ceremony and helped us have a very memorable day.

For our VR at Disney, we used one of their recommended officiants and he was just barely okay. We struggled to get him to personalize the ceremony and he kept wanting to add in religious elements that we didn't agree with. Even though we thought we had come to an understanding, he threw in some unexpected and (for us) inappropriate language during the ceremony. I was annoyed.

Mary

 

[Deesknee]

I think what you are doing is very romantic. Obviously you are very in tune with your wifes likes and dislikes. I have 2 thoughts...1) is she going to be disappointed it is not in the wedding pavilion and 2) would she want to re-wear her original wedding gown?
Neither of which I would care about, but I understand some would.

Either way, I'm sure she will appreciate how much effort you are putting into making this special for her.

Keep us up to date on all the happenings. Wish my dh would come on this board and see how some guys do it. Love him to pieces, but not the romantic.

 

[amymugica]

Just wanted to let everyone who helped give my DH advice know that the surprise wedding was fabulous! The photo session on the beach ruse was very efficient and allowed me to pick out a beautiful, flowing white gown which turned out to be perfect for a beach wedding! They did end up telling me the night before b/c DH was worried I would want to do my hair a certain way or something, but it wouldn't have mattered, since I already thought we were having pictures taken, so I had hair/make-up planned accordingly and had even gotten a spray-tan and mani/pedi before we left home.

We couldn't have had better weather (overcast and about 72 degrees) for a wedding and photos on the beach!

My DS (9) "walked" (ran) me down the "aisle" (beach) as the violinist played my fav Disney romantic songs and our DD (6) played in the sand by DH's feet. My MIL got ordained and performed the ceremony. DH made me cry with his vows, to which mine ended up being something to the effect of "it's just been great. I can't talk or I'm going to break down!".

My best friend was there, as well - which was awesome since she was a bridesmaid in our wedding 15 years ago.

So to all those husbands out there trying to plan a surprise - do it! As for the ladies, I am definitely "a planner" and I think DH was worried the night before b/c I didn't ask any questions. But I told him, "You planned this and now I'm just excited to see what happens." In other words, I reliquished all control b/c it was too late anyway!

The photos are gorgeous and I will definitely try to post some with this if I can figure it out!

 

[NoOrdinaryPrincess]

Aww how lovely!

 

[Elsha]

What an amazing experience for you both!! This was so sweet it made me tear up! :good vibes

Congrats on your VR, and may you have many more loving years together!

 

[lpizzuro123]

So glad to hear how things turned out. How wonderful it must have been. Would love to see pictures.

Linda